Posts by Captain_Cretin

UK tax collector's phone service 'deliberately' bad to push users online, say MPs

I got through on the phone, but.....

A few years ago, suffering from side effects to medication that were killing my brain; I reached out to HMRC for help, as I couldnt think straight and needed help with my tax returns; online and emails were ignored for months, so I tried calling, I got through several times, and each time was promised help would be provided - but nothing ever came of it; by this time, I was racking up huge fines for not filing my returns.

In desperation, I POSTED A LETTER.

I had HMRC on the phone, talking to me and making an appointment to meet a real live person at a location near where I lived; when he realised I couldn't even retain single digit numbers read out to me to write down, and that I was in need of serious help, he completed the forms for me; got the fines dropped on the spot; and made notes on my account detailing my issues.

That meant HMRC knew I was suffering from a serious medical condition nearly a YEAR before the NHS, as my doctors were ignoring my symptoms.

''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''

My doctors finally took notice when I went blind.

Treatment restored my eyesight and reversed much of the brain damage, however I have large gaps in my memory, nerve damage and still have random issues retaining new information.

Stay safe everyone.

Free-software warriors celebrate landmark case that enforced GNU LGPL

Extra functionality

I looked forwards to coding for an automatic coffee maker extension to my Fritz!box, as it already sits right next to my bed - saving me the bother of lugging up and setting the timer on my existing coffee machine - which is probably full of Chinese spyware anyway.

Tech support world record? 8.5 seconds from seeing to fixing

Minimal consequences

That last guy got off really lightly; I fixed a similarly stupid issue that was costing the company around £1,000,000 a week (1990s numbers), and got the tech management team so angry, they concocted a story to get me fired.

Within an hour of telling the site manager how easily it would be to fix, and detailing exactly how to fix it with minimal down-time, I get called into a room full of senior engineering management and given a severe reaming.

Because it was their incompetence, back when they were the techs, that caused the mess.

I got pulled from the site and the job given to someone on the favoured "B" team, and I was assigned to light bulb replacement duties for a month, before the made up incident they used to fire me.

I got my revenge though, and a few years later, they were ALL made redundant; the company's main site is now a housing estate, and the head office, a luxury apartment complex.

BOFH: It's not generative AI at all, it's degenerate AI

Leagally speaking....

This would never work, abusive, deceptive EULA are not legally enforceable; at least outside of the USA.

Has the company moved location and not told anyone??

Firefox 128 bumps system requirements for old boxes

Re: Hmm

Windows hit it's "Power User Friendly" peak with WinXP, and each release since then has made it harder and harder to work under the bonnet; there were things you could do to an install (both good and bad) with XP that are impossible to do from within an active Win 7 system; but then again, Win 8 to present Win12, lock down the system even further, with Win12 giving all the tinkering options of an early Android phone; ie This, or nothing.

TBF, there were also a few things I could do with Win95/98 that I couldnt do with XP; but they werent deal breakers.

Win7 (I skipped Vista), was when my "Mauve Screen of Death" hack from Win3, stopped working; a mauve background with dark purple text was so much more relaxing than the standard BSOD.

Fixes some recent YouTube issues - with adblockers

As the title, I have been plagued with stalled videos recently, as YT tried their latest attempt to inject adverts; causing the videos to just stall, and requiring multiple page refreshes to clear; sometimes a LOT of multiples!

Since the update arrived, all YT videos play properly again - without adverts.

ARRRH!!!

For the record: You just ordered me to cause a very expensive outage

Practice makes Prefect.

The more often you walk out on an abusive boss, the easier it gets.

I remember feeling physically sick, the first time.

By the time I walked out on my last tech* position, it wasn't even a conscious decision; I was gathering my tools and heading to the door without even thinking about it.

* I was 2 hours late on site - after rescuing 2 girls from a wreck on the M5, and being made to hang around and give a statement by the Police; even though I stayed onsite to finish the job beyond normal end of day - I got docked half a day's pay and told I should have left the girls to die.

Fun Fact: EVERY firm I walked out on, went bust within 24 months of my leaving; am I a jinx, or have a 6th sense?

Windows 95 support chap skipped a step and sent user into Micro-hell

Hmm, I smell a rat.

Win95 was my first exposure to WinOS's and I think I reinstalled it about 50 times in the 1st month, paring it down to under 40 minutes, as I messed around and broke it.

It was quite possible to write a fresh install over the top of the existing install and lose nothing; as long as you hadnt stored anything in any default "My" folders.

To this day, I never use those folders !!

I forget the exact process, I had a printed sheet of instructions from Evesham Micros that had arrived with my mum's new PC - which was the reason I built my first Win PC - to sort out WTF she was doing to hers (saving everything to the root of C: was the main cause, it turns out).

Car dealers openly beg Biden to put brakes on electric vehicle drive

Re: Who wants a second hand EV?

S/H prices are dropping, because who wants to buy a s/h EV for $45K, when you can buy a brand new Tesla for less?

Nearly all of the legacy car makers have had to drastically cut the cost of their new EVs to compensate for that; with many UK prices dropping by up to 50% on delivery mileage EVs over the last 2 months.

Some new EVs are now priced below that of their ICE cousins.

KIA EV9

Since it was specifically named; and I already know the answer...

US dealers are trying to make a 100% markup on the EV9; over European/UK pricing; almost exactly doubling the price.

A guy on one of the forums I frequent posted an invoice for a new (ICE) Dodge he’d ordered; the dealer had added $135K "in high demand" charge on top of the $65k asking price; and this before calculating taxes and the spurious extra charges they like to add to a new car price.

Pre-covid, these cars were around $45K OTR.

Electric vehicles earn shocking report card for reliability

Re: Odd

1st gen Ampera came to Europe; it didnt gain much traction as it was a heavily compromised design; cramped interior, with only 4 seats, no roof rack or towing allowed; and the petrol engine was pretty crude.

Also, the prices were far too high.

Want to live dangerously? Try running Windows XP in 2023

360 Chrome

My wife had this installed on her PC when we first met; it was part of a suite of "360" branded programs replacing standard M$ offering with Chinese government approved versions, and they were FULL of spyware.

Just to be warned; the spyware was so intertwined, it couldnt be removed without trashing the entire PC.

I was still using XP on an ancient Asus 901 Netbook until 2018; as a PC for my overseas travels; I never had any virus issues on it; even plugged in to some Chinese networks of dubious origin.

1KG netbook in the largest Laptop bag you could get, meant an extra 5-10Kg of luggage on a plane; as airlines didnt count laptop bags as hand luggage, and didnt weight them either.

Smartphone recovery that's always around the corner is around the corner

Agreement

My 2019 Xiaomi Mi 9 Lite still reports 98.9% battery capacity using 3rd party battery apps; why the hell would I want to change a perfectly good phone other than for vanity ??

Unlike my sister's 2021 model iPhone, which wont last a day, I dont have ANY battery anxiety, and dont need to charge it more than once/twice a week.

BTW, I dont follow 80/20, but never fast charge it either.

Newer iPhones have worser battery

My sister bought her latest iPhone 18 months ago, the battery is already in a worse state than her 6 y/o iPhone; and wont get her through a full day.

Techie sacked after jetting to tropical island on sick leave

The Odds.

I find the "spotted by colleague" pronouncement very suss, I have visited Hainan; it isnt exactly small, and has at least two major airports (north and south), as well as high speed rail and ferry connections to the mainland.

So the chances of passing through the exact same terminal at the exact same time are VERY low.

Alibaba and Huawei set to debut generative AI chatbots

The released Chinese AI shows one thing very clearly - it has been stolen from a Western source - as it doesnt understand Chinese at all - and has been caught translating Chinese into ENGLISH, then back again - making all sorts of humorous errors due to the fact Mandarin cannot be literally translated; many common Chinese phrases mean one thing, but the actual words mean something entirely different - and the released AI was missing ALL of the phrases.

Then there is Huawei, I look forwards to their next public demonstration, after the "Thai girl in a box" version they brought out last time (Sarah AI) - "YOUNG GIRL AND BEAUTIFUL !! ".

It is worrying that EL Reg has a weaker grasp of what is going on inside Chinese tech companies, than "The China Show"; which is a couple of guys who used to ride around China on motorbikes and film themselves.

Duelling techies debugged printer by testing the strength of electric shocks

Mo-dills

I worked with an old guy like this once.

Hired because he attended the same church as the boss, he was supposed to be an IT expert, but called MODEMS, MODILLS, and couldnt figure out the wiring in a plug.

OBVIOUSLY, he got promoted.

China cuts off two chatbots: A local effort that flopped, and ChatGPT

How about Huawei's Effort ?

Ie, a Thai girl hidden in a booth answering questions, while some stolen avatar rendering is displayed on a screen in front of the booth?

"I am young girl and beautiful !!!!!!"

https://youtu.be/z2jokenN20U?t=206

Smile! South Korea's moon orbiter sends back first snaps of Earth

97th person

May I be the 97th person to point out the Earth has more than one natural satellite. ??

https://youtu.be/GOXKs3nwAl4

Google unleashes fightback against ChatGPT, a Bard by any other name

I wonder.....

For Google, this was a pretty fast response; you don't think they asked ChatGPT to write the "Bard" AI for them ....... do you?

First Patch Tuesday of the year explodes with in-the-wild exploit fix

Re: And so it begins

Details after the fix.

This was one of those tiny Lenovo boxes, with an NVME drive internally, and an old Win7 HDD in a USB case - it appears that the old drive confused Win Update; and also screwed all recovery attempts from my Win10 recovery thumbdrive.

I was faced with options to repair Win7 or Win Vista, despite the recovery tool clearly saying it was Win10 and the NVME drive; ditto all restore or back-up options.

After unplugging the external drive and rebooting, the repair options started working correctly and Win10 options replaced Win7/Vista; so I could roll back a few days and reinstall the updates with no issues.

I hope this helps anyone else facing issues today.

Re: And so it begins

Firth thing my mother did was turn to my step-father and ask what he had done to fcuk it up:-)

And so it begins

I was woken up by a relative phoning and reporting a bootloop after the update this morning.

Meet the merry pranksters who keep the workplace interesting, if not productive

Dobby/Philip ?

I see several different people's stories have been compressed into one.

The call forwarding prank was mine.

The manager involved was so ineffective, I used to refer to him as "Captain Kirk's cardboard cut-out", or "Cardboard cut-out" for short.

Why "Captain Kirk" ? Well, he had this way of being very over energetic in meetings with other managers, making out he carried the weight of the whole company on his shoulders - while doing eff all on the topic once they had all left.

At the end of my tenure (I got fired ); after another diatribe from a factory manager over a constantly failing set of safety cords - I lost it, and explained in great detail that the manager and foreman had botched the installation by not only buying and fitting the wrong spec equipment, but by bodging it's installation as well (because it was cheaper), and then went on to point out that it could be fixed for pennies and 30 minutes work, but that the Manager and his cronies didnt want to admit they got it wrong.

This fault had probably cost the company millions in productivity by this point, as the safety cord failed at least once per day per line, and because we were based at a different site, it usually took us an hour to get there and reset it each time.

After the fix - which I didnt do, as they were busy firing me, the safety cords never failed again.

THE FINER DETAILS

The safety cord run was 50 meters, but the 50m kit was 3x the price of the 25m kit, so the idiots ordered 2x 25m kits for each line, and just tied the ends together, pocketing the extra cash.

The problem was, these safety cut-outs were spring-loaded, so the springs were constantly pulling against each other, and the slightest touch would set them off, requiring 2 guys and some patience to get them reset and back in balance.

MY SOLUTION

Weld/bolt an upright at the mid-point, fit a ring bolt and tie the two runs to the bolt, so each 25m run was independent, and not pulling against the other end.

It took 4 guys 4 hours one Saturday morning to fix all the lines; and the fact they took 4 hours suggests they were slacking off for half of the time.

Windows 10 – a 7-year-old OS – is still having problems with the desktop and taskbar

Even the adverts

M$ coding standards are now so low, even some of the adverts in their Solitaire package lock up, and force you to restart the app.

(Idiot woman with sheep).

And they wonder why people don't want to pay for their cr@p.

The crime against humanity that is the modern OS desktop, and how to kill it

Peak Usability

While I agree that the Win7 menu was the peak; I still feel that WinXP was the peak for actual OS user experience overall.

There were things I could do under the hood in XP that were a LOT more difficult to do in Win7, and virtually impossible/impossible in WIn10.

My first experience of WIn10 was so bad, I went back to Win7 for another 4 years, and my second experience required the use of a Win7 OS PC to fix an issue with the Win10 machine's SSD, because the Win10 OS wouldnt let me fix the error, no matter how many permissions I gave myself.

If Win11 continues the removal of user control, you might as well call it " WinNanny "

Epson says ink pad saturation behind 'end of service life' warning on inkjet printers

Re: Why isn't it user replaceable?

Epson do, or did, printers with replaceable tanks; I replaced the one in my WP-4535 a couple of months ago.

It took all of 5 minutes, unlike a MUCH younger HP printer where the "Removable" covers hiding the tank, disintegrated - and since these covers were actually the main plastic parts of the shell - rendered the entire printer NFU.

Our software is perfect. If something has gone wrong, it must be YOUR fault

A mild infusion of yellow

I would send them a sternly worded letter by recorded delivery; except the latest Win10 update has bjorked my ability to print again.

WE ARE THE BETA TESTERS.

Boffins put supercomputer on the scent of a perfect landfill deodorizer

Fingers Crossed...

I am hoping what they come up with is better than the solution used a few decades ago by a major UK water company; they used "perfume" sprayers.

Except the "perfume" turned out to cause cancer.

Despite this, they kept using them, just telling on-site workers to hold their breath when the sprayers went off.

(That would be me).

For all I know, they STILL use them.

Engineers on the brink of extinction threaten entire tech ecosystems

Re: It isn't just about a paycheck

I cannot express how much I agree with this, I was an electrical/electronic tech from the early 80s through to the late 90s, when I just gave up on the entire industry after encountering more and more issues with working for idiots; from workplaces where I could be proud of the standard of work I performed (I have my name on two Queen's Awards); to places that demanded I bodge jobs to save a few beer tokens, or treated me like dogshit.

In the end, it reached the point where I was waking up every morning, looking for excuses to call in sick; so I quit the industry, and took up a career that paid a tiny fraction of my previous salary, but where I could pour my heart and soul into what I was doing, and where they had to FORCE me to go home, if I was sick.

US EV drivers won't be able to choose vehicle safety alert sounds

Criminal intent

I STILL intend to hack my Kia Soul, so it plays "I'm a Soul Man".

US lawsuit alleges tool used by hospitals shares patient data with Meta

Re: The USA is not alone

Agreed; 2 years ago I caught Dominos Pizza (UK), out; you couldnt get an online payment to process unless you allowed some FaceBook scripts to run.

Not sure if this was Dominos themselves, or the 3rd party payment system they were using, either way, Dominos no longer gets online orders from me, so even if they eventually fixed the issue, they lost my business.

This isnt the first time I have had issues with dodgy/sloppy coding in their payment process either.

GlobalFoundries, STMicroelectronics said to mull French fab

Garlic and Onions

As the only reliable French product was the guillotine, how do we identify and avoid any possible output from this fab, beyond the smell of garlic and onions?

Heineken says there’s no free beer, warns of phishing scam

Free stuff.

Can us older PC users at least get a free cup holder ?

I used to have the free Coke cup holder, but lost it years ago.

Intel delivers first discrete Arc desktop GPUs ... in China

Re: Silly, Narnians can't use Intel

Wouldn't that make Narnia perfect for Intel?

After all, there are plenty of leaks suggesting Intel cant write ANY functional drivers for their new GPUs.

Last I heard, Intel were trying to get hold of a billion monkeys with typing skills.

Makers of ad blockers and browser privacy extensions fear the end is near

Re: Why is Firefox Dying?

People are lazy, plain and simple.

Re: Keep Up the Extensions and Ad Blockers!

I used to use ad blockers, now I use NoScript, and dont need ad blockers, because all modern ads use active scripts, which NoScript can block.

Re: Chrome is the hellmouth

I aslo dont have a FarceBook account, believe it or not - they wont let me have one - every attempt to obtain one (boss insisted I have one), they banned it within 30 minutes or so, even though all I had done was fill in the profile page.

Boss didnt believe me, so she tried using my profile details, and also got banned; I suspect someone with the same surname did something naughty, locally.

Re: Chrome is the hellmouth

Re the pizza place, I stopped using their online service around 18-24 months ago, perhaps they finally took my complaints seriously.

However, I have a very fine grained script blocker and so I know 100% that the FarceBook script was the only one still being blocked, after temporarily allowing all others, one at a time; and it was ONLY when the FarceBook script was allowed to run, that the payment went through.

They PROBABLY have me on some type of list, as around 5 years ago, they were one of several companies that got a blistering letter about infosec, because they were allowing the injection of active scripts into a "secure" payment page, at the last stage of the payment process.

MOST of those sites now have those scripts ready for acceptance at the start of the secure session, with no new scripts injected after that point.

(My own BANK was one of the recipients)

Re: Chrome is the hellmouth

Yeah, I use a different pdf reader by default, but some lazy effing companies running online training/government depts, insist on Adobe and wont work without it.

The one training companies entire website was scripted for Chrome only and was extremely flaky using Firefox; when I complained and their answer was "Use Chrome", I replied, "How about making your devs code to international standards and not be lazy arses".

The website runs a lot smoother now.

Re: The mystery

As I have mentioned in another reply, the tick/untick box to install Chrome uses an active script on some website downloads (looking at you Adobe*), so if you are running a script or ad blocker, you dont always get the option, just a silent install.

*I stopped using Adobe reader some years ago, so I dont know if this is still true.

Re: The mystery

It's very simple, Google paid (and continue to pay) thousands of "Free" software companies like Adobe to include Chrome in all their downloads and updates, with a small "Opt Out" tick/untick box.

So tens of millions of marginally skilled users ended up with Chrome replacing whatever they were using before, and either thinking it was just an update to a new style - or realising, but not knowing how, to get back to their old browser.

Worse, this option uses an active script to display on many of these sites, so if you run a script or ad blocker, it may not show, and you get what is effectively a silent install of Chrome - which is how I ended up with it several times.

Re: Does anyone need more justification

Ré FF not working on some sites, this is the Internet Explorer 6 phenomenon, where one browser so dominates the market, lazy devs dont bother testing to see if their code meets agreed international standards - just test it against the dominant browser.

Last time I checked, FF was 100% standards compliant, Chrome was about 80%.

Chrome is the hellmouth

Chrome will continue to be the lead browser, because it continues to push its install via so many 3rd party apps, and app updates; it only takes a moment of inattention, and suddenly you have Chrome on your PC attempting to take control.

Even as a power user, I have managed to let Chrome slip through twice in the last 5-6 years; both times via an Adobe update - if you have certain active scripts blocked, the "Install Chrome" panel is missing, and you get a silent install - very crafty.

For me, it is a trivial matter to get rid of it, but the average web users may not even notice their original browser has gone; or know how to get rid of it and switch back.

Despite the authors claims that Firefox doesnt have the same level of addons that it used to, not one of the many I use have become unusable in the MANY years I have used the browser. Sure, some sites no longer work correctly, but that is due to lazy devs coding for Chrome only, not Firefox's' fault; and if the devs are that lazy, then I dont trust their coding to be safe anyway, so they can sit and swivel.

At this point, a huge shout of shame at a certain pizza chain, named after a game; where payments cannot be processed unless you allow FaceBook to track you - seriously.

Microsoft: You own the best software keyboard there is. Please let us buy it

Missing 6 words (based on historical precident)

Please let us buy it - so we can *uck it up.

AMD claims its GPUs beat Nvidia on performance per dollar

This performance per $ comparison isnt going to last long if they keep extracting the urine and bumping prices by 20-30% per generation, for a 2-5% performance boost (lower and mid range cards).

On Monday I gave up, and bought what I suspect was the last new-old stock 5500XT in the UK for my PCIE v3 system (£300.44); probably £100 more than it should be, based on pre2020 market conditions, but at least it isnt crippled by having only eight, or God forbid FOUR, PCIE lanes.

Oracle really does owe HPE $3b after Supreme Court snub

Hands up, everyone who thinks that $2.99 Billion will go out in legal fees?

First Light says it's hit nuclear fusion breakthrough with no fancy lasers, magnets

Confused

Are we 100% certain this is a UK group? Shooting things sounds very USian.

Epson payments snafu leaves subscribers unable to print

These subscription systems are a con, and as an aside; why doesnt spell check work for titles?

This is exactly why I refuse to sign up of any "as a service" products, either hardware or software.

I rejected Epson's ink rental service and pay a fraction of their charges to run my printers; as little as 0.1p per page black, and 0.5p colour (WP-4535)

China's digital currency comes to WeChat. Next stop: over a billion users

God is on the side with the biggest guns.

If this later implodes, the CCP wont be worried, they have been the authors of similar Ponzi schemes in the past - and are trying to fend off their housing market Ponzi scheme implosion right now.

If the masses get irked, the CCP has at least 4* military divisions trained in riot control and urban conflict, and hasnt hesitated to use them in the past.

*4 divisions of "Riot Control Militia" were deployed around 10-12 years ago to put down unrest in a number of southern cities, after a local government Ponzi Scheme cost millions their life savings; I doubt that was anywhere near the full number the CCP has.