Posts by Ace2

70-knot winds so far blamed for yacht disaster that killed Brit tech tycoon Mike Lynch

Friendly reminder that, “But you should have caught my crooked accounting!” is not a valid defense for said crooked accounting.

C-suite at Alphabet make B-A-N-K from 2024 equity awards

Not a one of them actually did any work.

Linus Torvalds goes back to a mechanical keyboard after making too many typos

You are still using an Apple Desktop Bus device???

Fusion eggheads claim modeling fix for particle escape - at least in stellarators

We could just turn off all of the AI datacenters.

DOGE worker's old creds found exposed in infostealer malware dumps

Re: Much as I'd love to dunk on a scummy DOGE bro

“If this guy has worked in the security world you would assume security testing is part of what he does.”

So many things wrong in this sentence…

These turds don’t ‘work’ in any normal sense of the word. They just know which narcissist knob to polish on the regular. And you know about ‘assume.’

OS-busting bug so bad that Microsoft blocks Windows Insider release

I’m less impressed that it got caught before Canary, and more concerned by - HOW DID IT GET MERGED INTO THE TREE AT ALL?

Brewhaha: Turns out machines can't replace people, Starbucks finds

You can’t drink all day long if you don’t get started early in the morning!

The explanation I’ve heard is that coffee beans vary dramatically in their flavor based on the soil, climate, elevation, etc. So, if you want to make 10000 tons of it that all tastes exactly the same… your only option is to burn it to a crisp.

Hence Starbucks.

Your graphics card's so fat, it's got its own gravity alert

Re: Premature GPU Droop Syndrome

“Premature” would seem to indicate that there’s some point of maturity where this would be normal. An implication I increasingly resemble.

This is an excellent application for beginner-level 3d printing.

Homeland Security boss says CISA has gone off the rails, vows to set it right

Anybody know where to find a good gravel pit?

Elon Musk makes another cut – to his time at DOGE

Re: Sooner than later ..

Yeah, because Al Gore totally would have invaded Iraq on some con-man informant’s say-so.

Fucking ACs.

Trump blinks: 'Substantially' lower China tariffs promised

Mad king? Moronic asshole? Why not both?

El Reg's essential guide to deploying LLMs in production

“Don’t”

Dems fret over DOGE feeding sensitive data into random AI

I’ll feel better about America when Elon Musk is dead.

Krebs throws himself on the grenade, resigns from SentinelOne after Trump revokes clearances

Re: fluctuat nec mergitur⁽¹⁾ ...

"unlike the millions of "ordinary" Americans who have been hording weapons ostensibly against the return of a King and yet seem unmoved by his arrival."

Well put.

Microsoft total recalls Recall totally to Copilot+ PCs

Ha. Ha ha.

Atlassian makes its Rovo AI free, for now, to reduce 'friction' holding you back from agentic nirvana

Sounds great! All of the morons can go learn how to be “prompt engineers,” and I’ll be over here continuing to make $$$$ doing things for people who actually need the things to be done correctly.

Microsoft to mark five decades of Ctrl-Alt-Deleting the competition

This is a true story…

I once held a Windows phone. It was the night my car broke down on the interstate, before I owned even a basic flip-phone. One of my passengers happened to have a Windows phone and handed it to me so I could call a tow truck. The call wouldn’t go through, though. He took it back and said, “Oh, sometimes I have to reboot it before I can make a call…”

System builders say server prices set to spike as Trump plays customs cowboy

Re: Shooting yourself in the foot requires access to a gun

Please sir can I have another

Intel and Microsoft staff allegedly lured to work for fake Chinese company in Taiwan

“Friends and allies”? We still have those?

Tech support session saved files, but probably ended a marriage

Re: I know about ambitious lazy know-it-alls as well

Teachers around here make poverty wages. Again - AGAIN - we’re having a teacher leave in the middle of the year so that they can get a job that pays enough to live on.

In short, go fuck yourself.

Mobile ad world drama: AppLovin not lovin' short seller assault claiming fraud

They named their business “AppLovin”?

It sounds like a rejected McDonald’s promo campaign from the 90s.

Feds charge three over Molotov attacks on Tesla sites in multiple states

Re: Capitol rioters were terrorists by that definition

“More and more evidence”

None, is I believe what you meant to say.

Re: Irony

“Predominantly blue areas”

Fuck you and your made-up nonsense. Fucking coward.

Capital One cracker could be sent back to prison after judges rule she got off too lightly

“She then bragged about the score on GitHub”

Add a few years for utter stupidity!

SAP legacy ERP customers still in no rush to adopt latest platform

Re: Modernisation a customer demand.

It’s a good idea to disclose when you work somewhere…

VA IT contract cancellation DOGE boasted about ... was due to end in 10 days anyway

Re: Early termination fee

“Newt says that 'twas”

For some reason, that all ran together in my mind to “twat”

CISA fires, now rehires and immediately benches security crew on full pay

Re: Benched ? LOL

These are people that think that not paying their bills on time is a good way to save money. It boggles the mind.

One thing that Musk has no conception of is the entire universe of things he doesn’t know. In this case, the relevant ignorance would be the history of the civil service: why we have it, why there is a civil service exam and civil service protections, and why it was such a huge improvement over the old spoils (‘patronage’) system.

We have one of the best, least corrupt bureaucracies in the whole world, and Mr Ketamine is trying to burn it down because he doesn’t even care to try to understand it.

We heard you like HBM – Nvidia's Blackwell Ultra GPUs will have 288 GB of it

Come on bubble… pop pop pop!

Curious tale of two HR tech unicorns, alleged espionage, and claims of a spy hiding in a bathroom

Re: locked himself in a bathroom

Upvoted but with a groan

Surprise! People don't want AI deciding who gets a kidney transplant and who dies or endures years of misery

Re: AI is a fraud, and you and I know it.

If this is a send-up of today’s “AI” trying to make a logical argument, it’s brilliant.

We are rapidly approaching the point where the stock-market fluffing tech people (who should know better!) have engaged in is having real negative consequences. AI is a fraud, and you and I know it. When it was just about getting rich by duping investors it was harmless.

Now it’s making our streets unsafe (FSD and robocabs). Sounds like ATC and the VA healthcare system are next. This is madness.

Cheap 'n' simple sign trickery will bamboozle self-driving cars, fresh research claims

My Tesla doesn’t appear to recognize temporary speed limits (light-up signs in workzones) at all!

SpaceX's 'Days Since Starship Exploded' counter made it to 48. It's back to zero again now

Unfortunately Herr Musk was not a passenger on said vehicle.

All of the carbon reduction stuff I have ever done - recycling, reuse, walking to the store, keeping the AC at a moderate level - all of it just evaporated in the atmosphere. I don’t know what we’re doing as a civilization.

Cloudflare's bot bouncer blocks weirdo browsers

Re: power without responsibility

This is the most remarkably condescending comment I’ve ever seen on El Reg, and that’s saying something.

Here's the ugliest global-warming chart you'll ever need to see

Re: Just another alarmist global warming rant

Thanks for sharing. /s

GNOME 48 beta is another nail in X11's coffin

Re: No Thanks

I have an Intro-to-MechE level understanding of how cars work, and I’m very thankful that’s good enough to get me where I’m going. I suspect for most of the population that computing is similar.

Google confirms Gulf of Mexico renamed to appease Trump – but only in the US

Re: Ha

If you knew anything about anything and weren’t just an ignorant far-right shitposter, you would know that all Alaskans (90%+ Republican!) always have and always will call it Denali, because that’s its name.

'Maybe the problem is you' ... Linus Torvalds wades into Linux kernel Rust driver drama

Re: Lilliput, Blefuscu & boiled eggs

We’re not talking about the page table; we’re talking about the device driver interface. Rust is going to help me get my DMA barrier macros correct how exactly?

Democrats demand to know WTF is up with that DOGE server on OPM's network

It’s almost like they weren’t actually that concerned about Hillary’s email security.

TSA’s airport facial-recog tech faces audit probe

Re: Boiling a frog

And what the failure rate is for white people vs brown people.

Re: Opting out == unsubscribe

I opt out, every time. Mostly the people behind me say, “What? You can do that?”

Fuck all facial recognition tech. It’s trash.

Palantir designed to 'power the West to its obvious innate superiority,' says CEO

Re: Whatever you say Alex, you're the master race

If you had any moral scruples at all, you wouldn’t take a job there in the first place.

Ah yes, preventing goose-stepping in the EU, and bringing it back in swinging style in the good ‘ole USA.

Elon walks like a fucking duck.

Intel has officially missed the boat for AI in the datacenter

Re: "Intel has officially missed the boat for AI in the datacenter"

The boat is taking on water…

Musk torches $500B Stargate AI plan, Altman strikes back

Re: Dear ChatGPT

Ignored? I would be ok with the neglected housecats having a go at the leftovers.

This is how Elon's Department of Government Efficiency will work – overwriting the US Digital Service

Re: Efficiency

I regret that I have but one upvote to give

Re: Once a lap-DOGE ...

I thought the headlines about Ramawhatever “departing DOGE” raised interesting philosophical questions.

Is it possible to depart from somewhere you’ve never been?

Is it possible to depart from something that does not, in fact, exist?