Posts by The commentard formerly known as Mister_C

Tesla board wants to grant Musk $1T in stock, Norway wealth fund says nope

Re: Hybrid Theory

maybe it's just AI hallucinating again

Equinix revealed as occupant of £3.9B UK datacenter campus

Re: water usage of office-building levels

bet you a pound against a piece of shit that there will be zero rainwater harvest on that 85 acres to cover the water requirement, all their water usage will be mains (i.e. drinking water quality).

and don't get me started on where their "renewable" elastic trickery could be better used.

TL;DR - taking lots , giving nothing.

Flight simulator fans revive a classic Boeing 747 cockpit

"it is also just as cool as it sounds."

That's a PoV comment if ever I saw one.

I know exactly what he means. And so does Mrs_C.

'Fax virus' panicked a manager and sparked job-killing Reply-All incident

Re: Early On-Line Shopping

Fans of the highly steamed Goon Show will, of course, be quite used to photographs of currency being used to pay bills.

"

Seagoon: Well, gentlemen, I've read the meter. And you were quite right. You'd only put on one more therm - one and six please.

Grytpype: Right. Here's a photograph of two shillings.

Seagoon: Thank you. And here's a photograph of sixpence - change.

Grytpype: Thank you.

"

and later

"

Seagoon: But if you're President Fred, there's a gas bill here which now stands at four pounds.

Bloodnok: Oh! Right, I'll pay you. Here's a photograph of a four pound note.

"

(Foiled by President Fred, text lifted from https://www.thegoonshow.co.uk/scripts/president_fred.html)

Brits warned as illegal robo-callers with offshored call centers fined half a million

Update. Jo is still working, despite being told to f''' off several times.

Starlink is burning up one or two satellites a day in Earth’s atmosphere

Re: We used to watch out for an "Iridium flare"

Agreed. Goldfish shoals nibbling at my toes is far, far better.

Only way to move Space Shuttle Discovery is to chop it into pieces, White House told

Re: Unless I'm hallucinating...

https://forums.theregister.com/forum/all/2025/10/01/texas_internet_outage_gunshot/#c_5153928

what could possibly go wrong...

Away from Oktoberfest, Munich's museums also serve science on tap

Re: Remove the sub

The U boat is certainly not sea worthy. It was acquired by the then-director of the museum by clever negotiation at the end of the Great War. The German navy was required to dismantle all their U boats and the director presented the case that cutting a hole through the pressure hull would prevent it being usable, and putting it into the basement of a museum hundreds of kilometres from the sea would make it doubly unusable. The U boat was therefore acquired and displayed as a cut-away exhibit.

Extra Geek points available for anyone who cares to name the location of the "other" U boat in Munich?

Brit scientists over the Moon after growing tea in lunar soil

or perhaps a strong Brownian motion producer.

Why Microsoft has the name of an old mouse hidden in its Bluetooth drivers

Re: Why Microsoft has the name of an old mouse hidden in its Bluetooth drivers

Unless you are a Norwegian desk lamp company

https://www.theregister.com/2009/09/11/disney_pixar_trade_mark

Researcher who found McDonald's free-food hack turns her attention to Chinese restaurant robots

Re: Bobdahacker — she

Driver "Bob" Parkhurst perhaps?

https://blackadder.fandom.com/wiki/Driver_Parkhurst

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G1QywDPkDjg

Microsoft keeps adding stuff into Windows we don't want – here's what we actually need

they never sell "Newer! Better!". they just make things slightly worse and claim it's an improvement - what I call "unprovements".

Desktops and printers in coffee shops? Starbucks Korea tells customers to 그만 해

Had the opposite over here

Our bank has closed its nearest branch, requiring us to use online banking. Mr C senior wanted to know how to do it (no smartphone but can use the web). The bank couldn't show him unless he took his device in with him. Would've needed to take desktop PC and monitor in. And probably the interweb connection too.

He's still having trouble with it. We try and help, but their instructions are shit and their helpdesk is clueless. It's caused him more stress than Covid did.

Antivirus vendors fail to spot persistent, nasty, stealthy Linux backdoor

Re: Wow, that's no script kiddie

https://sonichits.com/video/Jasper_Carrott/The_Mole

Intern did exactly what he was told and turned off the wrong server

Re: Incorrect labelling

Or Bangor to watch the horse racing (actually Bangor-on-Dee)

See Caver_Dave's comment below as well...

Problem PC had graybeards stumped until trainee rummaged through trash

Re: Pharmacists

Mrs C used to work at a company that believed this, so when the cutback cull hit they targeted one particular individual based on that (unsound) metric. Problem was, that particular individual was very good at his job and also very focused on keeping everything tidy. Week or two after he was "let go because policy" they ran out of stock for producing their main product line (did I forget to mention he was the raw material buyer) and they had to shut the works down until the supplier could expedite delivery (at premium price)...

Moral of the story - judge the person on how well they do the job, not how well they fit your (prejudiced) profiles.

Microsoft Copilot joins ChatGPT at the feet of the mighty Atari 2600 Video Chess

Re: Turing Test

Unfortunately, if you're persistent enough to get past the chat bot then you end up with a talk bot, and their limited script set means that most will also fail the Turing test.

There's no international protocol on what to do if an asteroid strikes Earth

Re: "Approaching at Hypersonic Speed"

SPEAK UP. CAN'T HEAR YOU. UNLESS YOU SCREAM.

STILL CAN'T HEAR YOU. VACUUM AND ALL THAT

The Rock versus a rock? won't work. Needs paper to beat rock, as any fule know

Trump guts digital ID rules, claims they help 'illegal aliens' commit fraud

Re: Just read the article

and there was me thinking you'd answer with "that would be an ecumenical matter"

Microsoft's plain text editor gets fancy as Notepad gains formatting options

Re: Really pissed off with MS

"Word is now weird and not windows menu compliant"

I can't remember a time when their office suite WAS windows compliant. Menus, Save dialog boxes, Title bars - all different from the OS standard.

Techie fixed a ‘brown monitor’ by closing a door for a doctor

PERVERT

sorry

Pervis

Peter Pervis

SpaceX resets 'Days Since Last Starship Explosion' counter to zero, again

"sudo open the pod bay door" Shirley?

Techies thought outside the box. Then the boss decided to take the box away

Re: Aquarium offices....

It's a lonely plaice if you're the sole occupant.

Microsoft dumps AI into Notepad as 'Copilot all the things' mania takes hold in Redmond

Re: They just can’t help themselves

and also asked if I want t save a changed document when I close it, rather than have it saved for me and then resurrected next time I open Notepad to format-strip something.

Automatic UK-to-US English converter produced amazing mistakes by the vanload

Re: Do they really spell archaeology like that over there?

The Bosphorus is the stretch of water between Turkey and ... err ... Turkey

Re: (larger) US pint

and a litre of water's a pint and three quarters

Dilettante dev wrote rubbish, left no logs, and had no idea why his app wasn't working

Re: Divers log

"as opposed to a pound and a twentieth, or 105 pence."

I believe Sir is referring to One Guinea, aka 21 shillings.

Linus Torvalds goes back to a mechanical keyboard after making too many typos

My daily drive (don't judge me)

Is branded Compaq. Semi-inherited hand-me-down that I've gone back to after trying to keep up-to-date with limited lifespan USB landfill candidates. Purple PS/2 connector, so early 2000s. Runs through a PS/2 / USB KVM switch to my main PC and the work laptop.

Got a couple of black PS/2 connector mechanicals in a box somewhere ('90s computer fair acquisitions) so I reckon I'm nearly future proof, but not in the way that modern manufacturers mean...

Haven't improved my typing accuracy though

808 lines of BBC BASIC and a dream: Arm architecture turns 40

Re: Anybody know if that 808 line program is available?

or is it 404?

Heat can make Li-Ion batteries explode. Or restore their capacity, say Chinese boffins

Dendrites?

20-or-so years ago, there were lots of clickbait articles on the web about curing dendrites in NiCad batteries by zapping them with a chunk of charge (basically using a welding transformer rather than a battery charger). I wondered if this was a similar thing so did a quick search on "dendrite battery" and found many many links to Li dendrite research over the last few years. Could this be another similar piece of research?

Incidentally, on the subject of stuff shrinking when heated (and running off topic from the original article). Steel changes from body centered cubic crystals to face centered cubic crystals, a more compact structure. The steel therefore contracts at the phase change temperature. Whilst an engineering student, I had this demonstrated to me by a lecturer running a current through a steel wire that was fixed at both ends. It expanded as it heated up, causing it to droop and droop and then suddenly shrink and (almost) straighten, then droop again. Allowing it to cool naturally reversed the process, quenching would have kept the structure.. And that's one of the forms of heat treatment

Trump kills clearances for infosec's SentinelOne, ex-CISA boss Chris Krebs

Re: I like Americans…

unfortunately, that's funny as in "this tastes funny" not as in "you're funny, I've laughed twice now".

One of the last of Bletchley Park's quiet heroes, Betty Webb, dies at 101

Re: No More Secrets

It is. Enjoy.

US Army’s laser obsession continues with yet another drone-zapper deal

High Energy Laser = HEL

To be deployed as permanent land-based systems - "HEL on earth",

Airborne will be Sky based - "HEL(S) angels"

Seaborne will be Ocean based - "HEL(O) sailor"

and the infantry semi-portable version will be "HEL in a handcart"

a government funded time travel system will suffer all the usual procurement problems and be delivered late.

Tesla Cybertruck recall #8: Exterior trim peels itself off, again

Re: Glue?

bogies!

Don't want Copilot app on your Windows 11 machine? Install this official update

but it's part of 24H2

so ain't going to sit on my company laptop. I've allowed 24H2 on twice and had to kick it off again twice coz it doesn't like my KVM switch. Lets me log on, but won't go any further towards displaying the desktop. Previous win11 is OK, win7, pi and SuSE (on other KVM ports) are all fine but 24H2 won't play. So I'll stick with unpatched plus @mickaroo's reply to my comment last week about kicking copilot out.

Microsoft adds another Copilot hotkey – this time for AI voice chat

and for the poor buggers that use computers for REAL WORK?

ALT-SPACE is already a hot key combo in the software I use to earn money to pay my mortgage. Will this unprovement(*) take priority? Does this mean that microshit is actively going to make it harder for me to make a living? FFS!

(*) unprovement - an addition to software inflicted by a software house that reduces the user's efficiency

TL;DR - HOW DO I AUTO EJECT THE COPOILOT?

US stocks slip as Trump pulls trigger on Canada, Mexico, China tariffs

Re: told US farmers to "have fun" with the new deal.

he is the domestic source of guano

boy, am I going to get downvoted by the musk 'n' maga fanbois.

DIMM techies weren’t allowed to leave the building until proven to not be pilferers

Re: No honour anywhere

agreed. They used to be Hermes - aka Herpes. We now call them Nevri.

They've got one decent courier round our way who has a small van and sorts out the stuff that the regular courier can't be bothered with. the regular courier has a small ca, so only picks parcels smaller than a takeaway box. We regularly have stuff go missing in transit for a week or more.

HP deliberately adds 15 minutes waiting time for telephone support calls

Why the fracas?

I don't know why anybody would need a helpline for HP.

1 - Shake bottle.

2 - Take top off.

3 - Turn bottle over.

4 - (optional) - Slap bottom (of bottle)

5 - Enjoy food.

OK. Maybe step 2 might cause problems if you can't open source.

James Webb Space Telescope to size up asteroid 2024 YR4 before it rocks our world

Director's Discretionary Time

Sometimes DDT is a good thing

Eggheads crack the code for the perfect soft boil

Re: The puns, they hurt!

eggshellent puns all white. Good yokes.

BT fiber rollout passes 17 million homes, altnet challenge grows

Re: BT Whatnow?

In that case you might also enjoy the (very old) website http://standingonguard.com/ that used to refer to "Canada South"

Asteroid as wide as 886 cans of spam may hit Earth in 2032

to do that would require converting the asteroid's size in SpamTins into Coconuts and then extrapolating in terms of laden swallows. I tried but there wasn't enough room in the margin to show this.

How to leave the submarine cable cutters all at sea – go Swedish

Re: Not everyday does a Prefab Sprout lyric pop up in a Tech article...

Given the Whisky on the Rocks mentioned later, I would think the lyrics to "Glad it's all over" by Captain Sensible to be quoted:

Submarines in the harbor

Incognito

Submarines of your dreams

Not mine

The red red sky

Must take the price

For giving to the people

Who never never go to war

Shove your office mandates, people still prefer working from home

re "Ooh lots of downvotes!"

I'm going to guess that you and BOTH of your friends were behind my downvotes.

I work from home. The TEAM I work with are based all around the country because interwebs. I met my boss AFTER I'd joined the company because being briefed on the company work policies tied in nicely with collecting my company laptop. We work as a team without using cameras for online meetings and we work just as efficiently as teams in the same office. We use technology to allow this in the same way as people use a mechanical crane to do the work that many people used to do with a rope or (technological advance) a rope fitted with block and tackle.

I can understand that many many jobs can't be done remotely. But there is no reason for me to take over an hour to commute 10 miles (fighting past two schools of parents demanding their right to 4x4 their spawn to school) to be in an office to that my boss can see my scowling face. And then another hour back with twats using their cars as battering rams to force their way through queues at roundabouts to be 15 seconds earlier home. I actually work a longer day than I used to when commuting and still have more time at home because I don't spend time sitting in a tin box. hashtab PRODUCTIVITY GAIN

TL;DR Commuting sucks. If there's a better way to work, do it.

you are David Brent and I claim my five pounds

They've only gone and made Doom run in a PDF file

Re: Is there anywhere Doom has not been implemented?

Two spring to mind -

20+ years ago I saw a web page where the writer had gutted a CRT monitor and printed the various sprites on art board. Put them together like a Victorian childrens' theatre. Frame rate was measured in dpf (days per frame).

Fairly recently I read another account on t'web where the writer declared that an attempt to "render frames using LED strips and a Raspberry Pi"... didn't work. IIRC the summary of the paper was "the less said about that, the better." Shame, might've been a fun read [hint, hint to the Contributing Editor]

Re: How much ink?

or a Vegas dealer to riffle shuffle