* Posts by s. pam

647 publicly visible posts • joined 6 Sep 2007

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Elon Musk picks fight with Apple for slashing advertising spend on Twitter

s. pam
WTF?

YAMM - yet another Muskamania Mutter

What is it with this whack a mole guy? Is he Trump’s illegitimate spawn or just brain dead?

Musk: Twitter will have 1 billion monthly users inside 18 months

s. pam
Gimp

Just put it on autopilot, what could go wrong?

Musky boy really is more batshirt delusional than Trumplestiltskin isn’t he?

Man wins court case against employer that fired him for not liking boozy, forced 'fun' culture

s. pam
Facepalm

Good thing today I’ve…

Just completed my yearly mandatory managers global harassment training course!

World's richest man posts memes as $44b Twitter acquisition veers off course

s. pam
Flame

Oxford English Dictionary has a new word

Hey,

Muskimatum: An ultimatum that instantly backfires and destroys everything.

Multi-tasker Musk expects to reduce time at Twitter, seek another leader

s. pam
Trollface

typo in the article

Meh El Reg, there's a typo in the article I feel duty bound to point out:

"he bought for $44 billion isn't planning to run Twitter permanently"

That should say:

"he bought for $44 billion isn't planning to RUIN Twitter permanently"

Happy Friday all!

Elon Musk issues ultimatum to Twitter staff: Go hardcore or go home

s. pam
Big Brother

Cue up music from Talking Heads and Brian Eno...

"Burning Down the House" and "Burning Airlines Give You So Much More" keep replaying every time I see their bat shirt leader's latest orders.

Why Hitler? I'm sure smart readers can understand why that choice!

NHS tech chief dismisses concerns over loss of statutory power to protect patient data

s. pam
WTF?

Not sure NHS really gets digital

Go into the Ward Sister's office on the 7th floor of Hillingdon Hospital and see literal mountains of patient records in stacks from floor to ceiling

BOFH: Don't be nervous, Mr Consultant. Come right this way …

s. pam
IT Angle

should we call time on the BoFH?

As a very long time reader of the BoFH (even before el Reg) I am wondering if its getting past time for the BoFH?

Swiss Re wants government bail out as cybercrime insurance costs spike

s. pam
FAIL

isn't this a case of

a drug dealer telling their customers they need to buy more drugs to get over the drugs they've already bought?

will SwissRe be returning profits to any customer or government dain bread enough to sign up? of course not!

UK government set to extract hospital data to Palantir system without patient consent

s. pam
Flame

Who do I need to contact

To join in the lawsuit against this happening?

I opted out and continue to opt out.

BOFH: It's Friday, it's time to RTFM

s. pam
FAIL

I need some THC

or LSD after that meaningless drivel Simon

PS> our company has multiple wiki pages full of acronyms :(

Ad blockers struggle under Chrome's new rules

s. pam
Megaphone

Easy as solution

Don't use Chrome, it is the stuff of nightmares.

Use Firefox and avoid the insanity of Google's sticky fingers with DuckDuckGo as your default search engine.

Next problem?

Capita to see wave of UK government contracts come to an end by 2025

s. pam
FAIL

Best news of 2022

Absolutely fabulous to see the leeches in Crapita being jettisoned via the door.

Don’t worry darling, they’ll be back under a different banner soon though

Apple to bin apps that go three years without updates

s. pam
Coat

I for one love this idea

I have several reasons this makes perfect sense:

1. A number of app developers either don't exist anymore, or are too lazy to update after getting our hard-earned

2. There's a dearth of apps that just are unstable after recent updates to iOS and their developers seem to not care

3. This will hopefully force developers to not drop a product without a sunset period.

I lead a SW company and we work hard to keep our SW updated - regardless if it is browser or mobile based. Reputational damange by being removed from the App Store should hopefully wake some of these developers up.

Asahi Linux reaches 'very early Alpha'

s. pam
Mushroom

They'd be wise to change their logo!

Apple has sued the pants off of smaller companies / efforts. Their logo is likely to cause Apple's rabid solicitors to invoke orders :(

UK regulator puts NortonLifeLock merger with Avast on ice

s. pam
Coffee/keyboard

Norton is still alive?

WTAF? I thought someone had put a bullet in that system resource hogging POS years ago?

UK Home Office dangles £20m for national gun licence database system

s. pam
Childcatcher

Whilst this may be a real shot in the dark

Please don't let the contract go to some luvvies' firm as it will take 3 times longer than expected and cost 5X more than budgeted! That would lead us to shooting ourselves in the head, again!

A tale of two dishwashers: Buy one, buy it again, and again

s. pam
FAIL

it's not just retailers, i'm being spammed by the local NHS

in trying to navigate the morass of the idiot SW many local surgeries are ramming down our throats so we never speak to a human, our NHS surgery in South Bucks has been doing this to me for weeks! it all comes from being instructed to use their app after a SMS to get a blood test. not being able to book one until SEVEN weeks out, it also had a.n.other link. upon checking that link, the chemist wants to charge me £89 for the same test. i clicked no and now the computer is reminding me i have a pending transaction daily.

UK pins hopes on 'latest technology' to whittle down massive National Health Service waiting lists

s. pam
Mushroom

Great -- another £500M blown on luvvie consultants

FFS why don't they instead pour the money into visa changes, international recruiting, and build some new hospitals.

Taxpayers have suffered FAR TOO MUCH with luvvie consultantcy after luvvie consultantcy coming in, making grandios announcements and SFA comes from it. Then they're fired and a.n.other luvvie consultantcy gets hired.

HIRE MORE STAFF, not paying luvvie consultantcies

Geomagnetic storm takes out 40 of 49 brand new Starlink satellites

s. pam
Big Brother

Absolutely excellent news!

Muck's space junk has ruined a number of evenings of telescope watching with their annoying space junk trails. It is past time to remove them and free the heavens.

If he is so desperate to be Samuel L. Jackson from The Kings Men, he can build a smaller number of geostationary satellites and give them away for free.

Mobile networks really hate Apple's Private Relay: Some folks find iOS privacy feature blocked on their iPhones

s. pam
Megaphone

Simples to get around

Buy your iPhone unlocked-carriers cannot install their own crappy monitors

UK health secretary confirms end for NHS Digital, architect of the GP data grab debacle

s. pam
FAIL

All monies to the consultants, nothing for the patients

B’locks to yet another clusterflock courtesy of the government boffins who can’t share my damn hospital records in Berkshire to my GP in south Buckinghamshire. I had to copy pages of records and email to my GP surgery or they’d have nary a clue why/what was done for the 10 days I was on ward at Wexham Park.

In the end yet again the taxpayers get screwed for billions and the luvvies will laugh all the way to Monte Carlo

/past/epic/fail

Facebook may soon reveal new name – we're sure Reg readers will be more creative than Zuck's marketroids

s. pam
Black Helicopters

Would it be too much to call it…

Mind

Erasing

Retarded

Craphole

Arrogantly

Nuthole

Or ‘Mercan

Other alternative suggested by SWMBO is Anal Mind Erasure Co..

Apple emergency patches fix zero-click iMessage bug used to inject NSO spyware

s. pam
Flame

Apple screws the pre-iOD 13 customers

there's TONS of customers with perfectly working iDevices on pre-13 versions now vulnerable and Apple is doing S.F.A. for them.

so is it time to ditch Apple?

RAF chief: Our Reaper drones (sorry, SkyGuardians) stand ready to help British councils

s. pam
Mushroom

Sill they be armed with…

Anti BMW & anti Audi lane hogging missles?

Amazon to cover 100%* of college* tuition* for hourly employees* in the US

s. pam
Headmaster

Do they have to attend “How to avoid paying taxes” class as well?

Seems many a MBA could be gained on that topic to aid their education

Biggest takeaway from pandemic lockdowns for Microsoft? Teams stopped talking to each other

s. pam
FAIL

Microsoft Teams destroys human race, details at 11

Then it cheers around in Redmond for the human destruction they’ve delivered!

Get out the bunting!

Microsoft adds hybrid meeting features to Teams, including interruption-detecting AI

s. pam
Headmaster

Wot’s a “ Physical meeting room” …?

Yawn for the worst video app on the planet!

These in-features will obviously be for PCs only, as the Mac version of teams is similar to shite on a shingle.

Flushing roulette: Southern Water installing digital sewer monitors to prevent blockages

s. pam
FAIL

Flushing any optimism for clean water

They and Thames Water deserve an enema for the tremendous harm they do to our waterways!

Ex-health secretary said 'vast majority' were 'onside' with GP data grab. Consumer champion Which? reckons 20 million don't even know what it is

s. pam
Flame

total bull shirt

no we're not ok with it Handcock and we have opted it!

What is your greatest weakness? The definitive list of the many kinds of interviewer you will meet in Hell

s. pam
Flame

Additional category required: Interview from Hell

With more than 20 years under my belt, I have twice stupidly been brought in for interviews at the UKs biggest (based in Hatfield), fully automated food warehouse/delivery company. After the interview from hell the first time 4 years agi, I made it extremely clear I would not go throught that again last year.

What happens? I rock up on Zoom, undergo 7 hours of non-stop interviews (vs. F2F previously) only to have it sprung on me, you've still got to do our panel interview. Said company panel interview gives you 1 hour to prep, then you present and through totally B.S. decisions invisible to you, they give you the thumbs down with NO feedback.

Total. Utter. Moppets.

On every level.

I no longer have a burning hatred for Jewish people, says Googler now suddenly no longer at Google

s. pam
FAIL

What utter b'locks

he's trying to do a Cummings and step back from piss poor behaviour yet he doesn't realise on the Internet no one knows you're an asshat forever!

Hungover Brits declare full English breakfast the solution to all their ills

s. pam
Devil

Nothing better than the Texan cure of...

Chicken Fried Steak with gravy*

Hash Brown potatoes

2 scrambled eggs

Southern style biscuits

*= either gravy w/ bacon grease or sausage grease works fine!

India tweaks telecoms laws to make itself an even more attractive offshoring destination

s. pam
Coat

Of course they've got to get reliable networks

the internet backbone and local connectivity in India is appalingly unstable.

Mind the gap(ing mouth): London's Underground to get ubiquitous mobile phone coverage

s. pam
FAIL

El Reg you’ve failed to mention

Virgin/EE already have this in a lot of stations…and it’s another reason to take the bus in Londonium as the last bastion of mobile free zones will soon be gone.

Not an improvement one bit!

What Microsoft's Windows 11 will probably look like

s. pam
Facepalm

Always advertise Windows with a Blue anything!!

Meh, what Marketroid decided that showing a Blue something on a desktop was a good idea obviously hasn't experienced the BSOD enough.

Off to find a tube of airplane glue to sniff....

Want to keep working in shorts and flipflops way after this is all over? It could be time to rethink your career moves

s. pam
Happy

As long as you work for a DECENT company

you can work from wherever provided you have a laptoy and decent bandwidth.

employees have actually worked MORE and to a higher quality due to Covid.

companies too damn stupid to realise this need you to fire them and find a new gig

An anti-drone system that sneezes targets to death? Would that be a DARPA project? You betcha

s. pam
Headmaster

spraying pink spunk doesn't solve the problem

having Drone Vs. Drone wars won't work as when the nasty drone comes down, things will likely still go BOOM.

hasn't DARPA read Spy vs. Spy in Mad magazine?

Siloscape malware targets Windows containers, breaks through to the underlying Kubernetes cluster

s. pam
Pint

Micro$oft never has bugs

Just like a drunken Trumplestilkskin supporter they don’t have bugs. Kudos to the researcher for validating why we don’t release products for Windblows containers!

Cryptography whizz Phil Zimmermann looks back at 30 years of Pretty Good Privacy

s. pam
Thumb Up

I remember my PGP T-shirt well!

When Phil was being harassed by the US Gov’t goon squad there was a legal defence fund setup that by buying a T-shirt with the algorithm on it you contributed. I wore it proudly to conferences and through airport security regularly to taunt officers.

I use OpenPGP on all my devices still to this day!

Lotus Notes refuses to die, again, as HCL debuts Domino 12

s. pam
Pirate

Scrotus Bloats

1/2 an application for 1/2 a brain cell.

Nothing sucks like Notes does - been there, had to sysadmin it at one point. On Solaris

Too easy. Microsoft introduces moderation for Winget package repo after spike in bad submissions

s. pam
FAIL

Should’ve gone to Github

For a serious clue about open source, management thereof & a big frigging clue bagpipes but Redmond is far too arrogant to follow others!

Microsoft releases command-line package manager for Windows (there are snags)

s. pam
Mushroom

Why won't they just support Ansible fully?

We don't need yet another sysadmin package management tool. We need full support for Ansible so we can manage Windblows systems!

Dominic Cummings: Health secretary's 'stupid' targets delayed building UK test and trace system to combat COVID

s. pam
Big Brother

Gollum has spoken

and Cumspot will continue to make anything everyone else's fault except his. his swagger and arrogance of the cluster fluck he had a direct hand in is beyond compare.

Arm freezes hiring until Nvidia takeover, cancels everyone's 'wellbeing' allowance

s. pam
FAIL

Employment solicitors must be salivating

Any merger/acquisition that materially affects employee benefits is a very naughty move BEFORE the ink has dried. And an especially naughty move would be either company materially or directly affecting the other until the merger/acquisition is complete could be legally dangerous!

I hope the affected Arm employees are speaking to solicitors!

Virgin Galactic goes where it's gone twice before, for the first time in two years

s. pam
Angel

When does the final crash test dummy go up on a test flight?

Before this thing has paying customers Beardie should get himself on a flight just to prove he's putting his body where his mouth is!

Microsoft: Purveyors of the finest BORK since the 1990s

s. pam
Trollface

It always reminds me of the old...

Netnews group alt.swedish.chef.bork.bork.bork and makes me chuckle whenever I see a MSFT Bork in the news

Oracle sues Envisage claiming unauthorized database use amid licensing crackdown

s. pam
Megaphone

Time to flush Oracle

and move to Postgres, MariaDB or MySQL and run that on AWS.

far simpler, just export your schema, import and screw Larry.

Not keen on a 5G mast in your street? At least it'd be harder for crackpots to burn down 'a flying cell tower in orbit'

s. pam
Thumb Down

Great more crap

Flying in near-Earth orbit that creates trails across the sky at night thereby obscuring amateur astronomy. Just what we need...NOT!

Another week, another issue: Virgin Galactic mulls test flight restart as VSS Unity fixed – but VMS Eve might be borked

s. pam
Pint

Another Beardie epic fail??

you gotta hand it to Beardie and his fundraising ability to have loads of projects that fail.

Brunel would be amazed the wind direction of suckage around after his demise...

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