Posts by Phil Atkin

What the 4K: High-def DisplayPort vid meets reversible USB Type C

100W? Isn't the copper a bit thin for that??

I feel a hot cable coming on.

Raspberry Pi B+: PHWOAR, get a load of those pins

It makes a pretty nice synthesizer

Despite it being a HUGE struggle to get it to go fast enough - not sure I can link in here but this was captured straight out of a running Pi - https://soundcloud.com/pisynth/popcorn-on-a-pi

Quid-a-day Reg nosh posse chap faces starvation diet

PORRIDGE!

I have spent the last 4 years eating porridge for breakfast AND lunch. Some 700 calorise, total cost abot 20p. Come on, this should be easy.

Exotic physics takes an arrow to the knee with new ATLAS results

I like that the photo illustrating the article ...

... looks like a Tardis zapping a Dalek ship. Sort of. If you haven't put your glasses on yet.

Meet the BlackBerry wizardry that created its 'better Android than Android'

I second that motion

The QNX engineering team is awesome.

How Google paved the way for NSA's intercepts - just as The Register predicted 9 years ago

Thank you for writing this

When people claim to me that Google are somehow kinder, nicer, less oppressive than Apple I shall think of this and smile.

Bacteria-chomping phages could kill off HOSPITAL SUPERBUGS

a) very interesting

b) keep up the Silicon Roundabout attacks.

That Bong dude hasn't written much lately, did his funding run out? Time for a C round.

Slip your SIM into a plastic sheath, WIPE international call charges

Spelling?!?!

'Peal back' eh - what's the world coming to?

Coming soon to Twitter: Inboxes BULGING with DMs from world+dog

Cue vast celebrity twitter exit

Hmm. I think they've cocked up here.

Third of Brits now regularly fondling their slabs, say beancounters

We'll see the usual pattern ...

... burst of Android sales, never refreshed as people realize they've made a terrible mistake, surge of 'back to Apple' some 12-18 months after the Android push.

IRON MAN MUSK: Elon reveals Tony Stark-style 3D design smarts

Laser sintering ROCKS!

That's the important bit folks, not the 1991 VR stuff. Lasers. Frikkin' lasers.

Apple's Siri 'hurls insults' at Google Glass

This is actually funny you know

Therefore, since the world is such a bloody miserable place lately, why is anybody complaining about this?

Tat bazaar eBay takes a rest for 'scheduled maintenance', goes offline

Tits are still up

Big tits, very much up.

Happy birthday MIDI 1.0: Getting pop stars wired for 30 years

30th anniversary of MIDI, 50th anniversary of the Mellotron!

A good year for unguitars and undrums I'd say.

Elon Musk unveils Hyperloop – the subsonic tube of tomorrow

Try as they might, they will not keep those tunnels free of low-pressure hardened rats

So what happens when one of these 'fearless of a gentle vacuum' rodents enters the compressor at 760 mph? Probably a big old train wreck.

Despite Microsoft Surface RT debacle, second-gen model in the works

Are you sure the platform is WIndows?

Because I don't see many - sorry, any - Tegra Android design wins out there right now. There seems to be the sound of tumbleweed blowing through empty streets compared to 12 or 18 months ago. Let's see how much better they fare when there is a good GPU in there with CUDA / OpenCL capability.

What did the Romans ever do for us? Packet switching...

Bitterly disappointed. I read the title as 'What did The Ramones ever do for us?' so the absence of Blitzkrieg, Baseball Bats, Gabba and Glue left me bewildered until I re-read the titles.

Apple: iOS7 dayglo Barbie makeover is UNFINISHED - report

I for one welcome our new gay pink gradienty overlords

Because they give you a fluffy gay pink phone with one hand, and a man-sweat stinky big-ole-pair-of-bollocks Mac Pro on the other. It's a WW1 shell case in shiny black ceramic stuffed full of GPU and extruded aluminium. It's totally, 100% dude, and is built for hitting 7 stone weaklings over the head. The chicks can keep their MacBook Airy Fairies and their phoney wonies, we men will have out iPads and our Mac Pros.

The new Apple - masculine and feminine sides in perfect balance.

Reg hack prepares to live off wondergloop Soylent

It's missing all the 5 major food groups

As far as I can tell, it has

No pizza

No beer

No bacon cheeseburger

No fruit'n'veg

No ice cream

although it sort of looks like ice cream after a night in the sun.

So zero out of 5 and one bad impersonation. I'll give it a miss.

Barcelona taps Tesla and Tegra for next-gen hybrid supercomputer

This article needs a good proof read

I know 'C' and 'G' look similar and all, but really - get thorough guys.

Weary quid-a-day nosh hack fears colonal mass ejection

Eat charcoal

Kills farts stone dead. Has transformed my life. Plus if you have a woodstove, it's free.

Fried-egg sarnies kick off Reg man's quid-a-day nosh challenge

I reckon I am nearly there, pretty much all the time ...

Since I decided to kick the 'fat bastard' habits of a long and pretty fat lifetime, I've been eating 2 meals a day of porridge with 'jampote' (basically foraged fruit - blackberries, hedgerow damsons and plums - collected for free and frozen in season, then cooked up in big batches with a bit of sugar to make a low-sugar jam). The liquid to cook up the porridge is about 30% water, the rest cheap as hell LIDL UHT semi-skimmed. So for sure my breakfast / lunch budget is about 20p a day. And has been for 3 1/2 years. Dinner is a 'real' meal.

At that rate surviving a week with dinner for 80p and no coffee should be easy (ish). The absence of coffee will be the problem.

Pictures (i.e. porridge is good for you) - http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/121102617700?ssPageName=STRK:MESELX:IT&_trksid=p3984.m1555.l2649

Apple alert as half China's fanbois consider switch to Galaxy S4

In China all software is free

It's cultural - piracy is 100% the norm, and it's way easier to get pirate software onto Android than iOS. Hence the desire to get onto the best Android phone, Makes perfect sense.

Happy birthday, LP: Can you believe it's only 65?

Sod the article

Just print lots more photos of Roxy Music album art please?

Apple engineers 'pay no attention to anyone's patents', court told

"ignore all patents ... "

I'd say in my experience that this is absolutely standard practice - engineers are instructed to never attempt to perform any patent prior art research, if an infringement comes up it's the job of legal to sort it out. So Apple are no better or worse than anyone else.

NASA launches iPhone spaceship app in 3D SPAAAAACE!

Great use for your embarrassing old iPad 1 without a camera ....

.... stick on the table with the registration image showing, allowing your shinier, thinner new iPad to be totally AR cool. It would have been cheaper to buy a printer of course but I wanted the new iPad more.

Standing NEXT to an HTML coder is like standing NEXT TO GOD

Are Bong Ventures hiring?

Seriously, this dude is da bomb. Nobody else in the entire world-beating UK HTML5 industry is quite so zeitgeistig, so utterly au courant. I could thrive in an incubator like that - astonishing, visionary, and surely an acquisition target to grow and frankly improve DFJ. I need those stock options fieldmarshal Bong!

Dark matter hits you once a minute

It's those damn photino birds

The sun Lieserl, the sun!

New iPad can't get its Wi-Fi up

ADSL speed?!

5-6MBits - "That's easily comparable to the ADSL speeds most of us enjoy" - try living in the rural Cotswolds, 1MBit is Ferrari pace round here.

Ten... Valentine's Day gifts for her

So it's true, women can only use technology if it's pink

Expect a thorough kicking when you get home, sir. Particularly if your gift of lurve is a pink USB hard drive.

SpaceX successfully tests SuperDraco rescue rockets

Hmm - if it's working ...

... why is the 'Test fire' clearly a bad rendering? Love what they are doing, but surely they don't need to cheat.

Planet-hunting Kepler hits EXOPLANET JACKPOT

That picture is rubbish

Have they never heard of antialiasing?

EMC Isilon stiffens penetration into NAS arena

"Stiffens penetration"?

How about a New Year's resolution - fewer cock jokes? Go on, you know you want to.

UK's top tech startup: Glasgow's tiny circle of animation wizards

Normally I wholeheartedly agree with Orlowski, however ...

... I don't get this. At all. Is that badly-synced, badly-animated, badly-rendered video supposed to be a showcase of world-beating technology?

Maybe it's just that particular video is rubbish, but if it's genuinely representative of what the software is all about, then the software and the company that created it are doomed. I really hope it's a great piece of software with a very, very poor showcase video.

The Cube: Apple's daftest, strangest romance

Cube

Oh I loved my cube so much ...

Shuttle mission: SPAWNING of the SPACE KRAKEN

Sheena 5

Errr - this could get bad - they'll either come back and demand the oceans. Or maybe they'll whizz off at almost light speed to escape the end of the universe. Depends if they read the short story or the big book.

Nikon D5000 digital SLR

OMFG

This is the third time, I've asked this, I know it's falling on deaf ears, but *PLEASE* get a photographer to review the cameras. Please. I simply cannot tell whether these cameras are any good or not because the photos that illustrate the reviews are garlic-turd stinky.

Canon PowerShot G10

Good Lord, look at the 'example' photos ...

... any chance we could have somebody who can actually take photographs be the reviewer next time? Hard to take any review of a camera seriously when the photos being used to rate it are so laughably dreadful.

Fring brings Skype to the iPhone

Wrong

'Steve Jobs stated explicitly, when he launched the official iPhone developer's kit, that VoIP applications would not be welcome.' - inaccurate. VOIP over WiFi is legit and will be welcomed. Over 3G or EDGE it's disallowed.

T-Mobile sinks money into femtocells

Ubiquitous mobile coverage?

No way - not out here in rural England. Femtocells make perfect sense to turn no coverage an sub-1Mbit broadband into a usable alternative to Skype.

IT problems force HMRC to extend tax deadline

Still unusable today

Great...

iPhone tops smartphone market

Of course it's a smartphone

iPhone most certainly is a smartphone - featurephones have a single CPU tasked with executing the radio stack and the 'OS' (for want of a better expression) - smartphones have a distinct baseband CPU to deal with the cellphone network, and another CPU - the application processor - running the OS and applications.