* Posts by PaddyR

25 publicly visible posts • joined 4 Sep 2007

Set-top box modders sent to prison


right so let me get this...

So...I've got a round letterbox on my 4 litre time travelling fridge and my square premuim beer wont fit thru it.

this guy was jailed for a year for physically doing the modding his pal got 160 hours community service, they estimate they made about £50,000


I wouldnt be suprised if they got their info from modshack, but still wouldnt say the modshack guys deserved that.

does anyone know any websites that show you how to get your microwave to work with the door open, I need a new winter hat.

'Great tits cope well with warming'


titter titter fnarr fnarr

I had these two for the most read on the BBC site

1: Great tits cope well with warming

2: Europeans get drunk 'to have sex'

of course it doesnt beat the google ads i got on the reg with the three step plan

1: Photos of cute girls

2: Sex Offender Registry

3: Sex Offender Database

a natural progression presented by Google

Jacqui Smith un-downgrades cannabis


Wow Man

now you can get 5 years in the pokey for possesion, so for wanting to sit at home giggling you can now cost the taxpayer a bloody fortune, fools.

think i'll go down a bottle of vodka, club some random numptie with the empty, piss myself, fall over and bust my head open, then its off to casualty for some taxpayer funded treatment and i can even amuse myself verbally and physically abusing the hospital staff, ahh a full evening for many.

and dont get caught with those mushrooms that grow the length and breadth of the country they'll give you 7 years for that

Winehouse cans Bond theme project


C'mon Sarah

Lets have it

IT angle, no coat too hot out there but i'll take a paris

Amy Winehouse pitches for Bond theme

Dead Vulture

time will tell, by the way

Hendrix, Joplin, Jones, Morrison , Cobain and many more, so all you critics give it another what, 3 years, then we'll see how good she is


@ Painters?

ha ha, no use posting anon when slagging the moderator.

she knows where you live mate

IT angle, coat and Paris

Paris Hilton

Wine-not- do a duet

with that other genius docherty. she can sing, and she lives the lifestyle, perhaps pete when he gets out the pokey can go round hers for a bit of the brown stuff and they can slabber out a good one.

Sarah's gettin a bit touchy on this one :)

Wheres the IT angle, has some B*****D stole my coat, Paris for F**ks sake

Judge issues arrest warrant for Darth Vader


National Hero

I hope someone got it on camera for youKnob, he deserves a medal. next we want to see the Harry Potter fans get it then the LOTR, star trek etc etc..

Biometric methadone dispensers tested on UK lags


dvd's ps3's wii's

Yes prison is shit for the people who dont belong there (minor fraud, fine defaults, self defence and the like) but to most in the prison system, its a rite of passage, a badge of honour. I've heard a guy say he was going to use his time to get off smack (never did, probably easier to get hold of in there, one method of smuggling i heard of was killing a pidgeon/seagull and stuffing the carcass then tossing it over the wall).

they should not have rights to stay wasted in there or play video games, they should have a grey wall to stare at and shit food.

lets take the futurama idea a step further and re-label the suicide booths "Methadone Dispenser"

US cops taser groom, cuff drunken bride


@David Wiernicki

Zomg zomg amerikkkan woosies you're all big girls blouses, whats wrong with a headlock and a bloody good kicking eh!

None of your point and click this side of the pond, up close and personal.

US teen cuffed for disposable camera 'Taser'



"shock from a plasma lamp through a motherboard", no, really, we do have to ask

Transgender man prepares to give birth


oh well

"why would a vegetarian want a simulated meat sausage?"

it is an interesting philosophical question, yes...but he/she chose to retain his/her female reproductive organs, just in case

so there would seem to be some sort of sausage aversion altogether here.

coat>hat>taxi for paddy

DIY satellite TV installer shoots wife dead


yeah sure, call me a cynic but.....

he thought the wife was in the house, or did he wait till he had a clear shot. What is it they say "marriage isnt a word, it's a sentence" and of course "If i'd killed her i'd be out the jail by now" or "cant live with them, cant get away with digging a huge hole in the back garden and burying them", well we can all stop digging the holes now and just install the satellite system. either bloody idiot or bloody evil genius

MPs get £2k home cinema on taxpayers


@Anonymous Coward

*I'm sorry that some people earn very little money, but £23,000 a year expenses to live in central London really isn't over the top*

tell that to someone working there earning £23,000 with no expense account


Theiving B******s

<total F****N RANT>

bollocks to, *ooh, they need somewhere to live when they are in london* pish, they buy a fuckin house at our expense get it fully furnished for bugger all outlay, then when they no longer *serve* the country the fuckwits can sell the lot, lock stock and barrel and stick the profit in their back pockets, what a completely annoying list that is. Also, of course they just mentioned the other day that they will will now have to produce receipts for purchases over £25, what was the figure before....£250 thats more than twice some peoples weekly wage. what do they do for it, blow hot air up each others arses and pat industry on the back laying the groundwork for a job when they quit parliament, what a state this country is in

</total F****N RANT>

I think i need to go have a lie down, no icon as there isnt an animated gif of some good for nothing bastard getting the shit kicked out of them

Analysts call for secure Facebook access for workers

Paris Hilton

pesky users

Ours are getting round it using internet proxies and it turns out we dont have a policy against either, i must admit to using these aforementioned proxies to see just how stupid new starts are, usually they have profiles on them all.

obviously id give paris a poke

UK supercomputer probes secrets of universe


I'm with paris on this one

I'm pretty sure that article was in english, perhaps amanfrommars could explain it to me in laymans terms.

If they find the answer will we puff out of existence!!!

maybe its 42

El Reg collectible pops up on eBay

Paris Hilton


Ask a frenchman

Paris cos you would

Paris Hilton

Can you reprint the headline story

UK Network staff worst in Europe - That is class, i'm sure my european colleagues would agree with it. yep that exchange rate looks fine to me.

Paris, for the french IT angle

NASA uses vertical treadmill to simulate zero-G jogging

Paris Hilton


A couple of bungee cords hooked into your waistband, could then be hooked to the treadmill to simulate gravity, could someone tell me how to apply for a research grant, I could split it between this artificial gravity and the sexy party drinking projects.

Paris cause surely her knickers will be on bungee cords

Smith says answer to knife crime is through the arch window


I seem to recall

when i was at school we had these really pointy things...what were they called again, oh yes pencils and pens, are crayons the norm now, although you could get one straight out the crayola box with a dangerous pointy end on it

Dildo rails dirty? Help is at hand


As well as cleaning the dildos

They also hover your upholstery, is this a good way to get it clean.

PC superstore unhinged by Linux


Been done

a guy in edinburgh drives a BMW E30 tourer (estate) with a 282HP ford cosworth engine in it, vroom, vroom.

I went to PC World once.........once

Scotland launches electronics design centre


just a wee note

when we rebuild the Golgafrinchams ships, there will be no-one left in the UK

Another investigation into Pirate Bay child porn



ok lets say i'm a total f*****g idiot. i goto pirate bay and search KP and a torrent comes up called "the most horrific KP ever.torrent". i click and start downloading. then i click on peers and get a list of all the IP's i'm connected to. OK the smart sickos will be hiding their real address, but come on its a bloody starting point, i dont believe there ever has been anonimity on the net and you'd be niave to think there was. it would seem to me the pirate bay are doing a service by letting the authorities see their LIVE logs thru the bittorrent client, IP address + timestamp = YOU. so whos bloody responsibility is it then, doesnt sound like the pirate bay's to me