Posts by KittenHuffer

Aviation watchdog says organized drone attacks will shut UK airports ‘sooner or later’

Re: Solution pretty simple though

Whoosh!

AI slop hits new high as fake country artist goes to #1 on Billboard digital songs chart

Re: Max Headroom...

Already been done!

Help desk boss fell for ‘Internet Cleaning Day’ prank - then swore he got the joke

Re: Sodding salesmen

Decades ago when I still did 2nd line support we had one secretary (there is always one) who consumed 90% of the training budget for their department, yet still seemed to need 90% of the help provided by IT Support. Repeated visits would be made to sort out problems that could not be replicated whilst the techie was stood there.

I'm there one time, and the issue could not be replicated. So I started to spin a yarn about the small RFID device that techies carried that would be picked up by the machine, and cause it to start working again. How I managed to keep a straight face I'll never know, as I could see the other secretaries all smirking and some of them going to great lengths to avoid laughing.

I returned to the IT department, only to be dragged in front of the Boss, to help him understand why he'd just has a request for one of the RFID devices that the techies carried!

25 years of meatbags permanently in space on the ISS

One step forward, two steps back!

When I was a mere baby, man walked on the Moon. We have not been back in over 50 years.

Now after 25 years of someone living in orbit, we are to lose that as well. How long before someone returns?

What's next? We stop flying high altitude aircraft.

You'll never guess what the most common passwords are. Oh, wait, yes you will

Re: What about username?

Even more annoying are the sites that require an email for the username ..... and then tell me that I have not entered a valid email address! The most annoying being my local council.

I have a domain in the .email TLD, and generate a unique email address for each site that I login to. That way if I start getting spammed I know who lost or handed out the email address.

But I occasionally run across sites that say that <yourcompany>@<mydomain>.email is not a valid email address. Only one of which has actually responded when I sent them a message about the problem.

Re: a random character

"icantbelieveitsnotbutter" - We were told that this password was discussed in the Australian parliament!

--------> Mine's the one covered in a suspiciously yellow, slippery substance!

Actor couldn’t understand why computer didn’t work when the curtain came down

Re: The Devil is in the details

ALL of them!

There's mushroom for improvement in fungal computing

Soon .....

..... it won't just be the programmers that are kept in the dark and fed on sh*t!

Smile! Uncle Sam wants to scan your face on the way in – and out

Aliens!

--------> Most photographed!

Sole trader dispatched almost 1M spam texts to hard-up Brits, says watchdog

What I would be more interested in .....

..... would be the story that they actually managed to get the money from this twunt.

It's all well and good making these announcements that someone has been fined for these types of actions. But as I understand it they only seem to get about 5% of the fines actually paid.

Frustrated consultant 'went full Hulk' and started smashing hardware

Re: I'm Not THAT Guy!

..... using a Maltron Single Hand Keyboard

Re: Not smashing..

..... and the horse has learned to sing!!!!!

Re: Get out while you can

Myself, and another guy, left our roles at one place within a month of each other, mainly because they piled everything onto us and didn't pay anywhere near the market rate.

The other guy already had something lined up, and I found something paying twice the rate after 6 weeks.

They interviewed to replace us ...... and failed.

Three months later they tried again ...... and failed.

Finally they shifted the jobs to a different pay scale that was at least 50% more than we had been on. Oh, and had to recruit three people to cover the variety of work that we had been doing.

I always wonder if they wish that they'd actually taken our salary complaints seriously.

The 'golden' rule of any tinkering ..... keep all the bits!

How do you solve a problem like Discovery?

Re: Step 1 might be the hardest.

Baby Hitler? Never heard of him! Who is he?

BOFH: Saving the planet, one falsified metric at a time

Re: Which side of the pond are you?

Waaaat we've got here is a failure to communicate!

Bonus points to those who know the film without practicing their Googlefu!

Apple’s AirDrop makes weird latency spikes for Wi-Fi wonks, researcher finds

Re: Do As I Say

"you're just holding your WiFi network wrong."

FTFY

Fake home invasion vid lands woman in real trouble

Re: So tell me sir...

Lawyer - I'm sorry Mickey, but Minnie being bucktoothed is no grounds for divorce.

Mickey - I never said she was bucktoothed. I said she was fscking Goofy!

Humans flunk the Turing test for voices as bots get chattier

You just train it with Scarlett Johansson's voice instead!

Hmmm.

IQ tests before being allowed to procreate?

China moves to extend control over tech industry's critical rare earths

I was going to say pretty much the same thing.

What is sauce for the goose is sauce for the gander!

Hundreds of millions of business PCs are still on Windows 10 as D-Day nears

Compare these to the promises made by His Muskiness and you will see that they are not even in the same class.

Tile trackers are a stalker's dream, say Georgia Tech researchers

Re: Tile

"You don't need to remember where you put your phone"

I'm kinda confused here. Don't you need the app on your phone to track the tracker that is attached to your phone?

To understand recursion you must first understand recursion!

Britain's policing minister punts facial recog nationwide

I think .....

..... one of these is going on my must have list.

Google reminds EU that Microsoft's cloudy licensing still stinks a year later

Google claim .....

..... that the kettle is black!

AI can now design functional viruses – not the computer kind, either

Re: Virus produced by nation state ...

They are a sub-species.

There is a reason why a high percentage of politicians come from the legal profession! When a lawyer gets greedy enough and sociopathic enough to cross a certain threshold .... they turn to politics!

AI in your toaster: Analyst predicts $1.5T global spend in 2025

Re: Anybody want any toast?

You do know that is what caused the accident?

- What accident?

The accident involving me, the toaster, the waste disposal and a 14lb Lump hammer.

After deleting a web server, I started checking what I typed before hitting 'Enter'

Re: code that ate itself

You can tell I'm in Red Dwarf mode now (see above) ..... cos all I can think is - Do the code go to silicon heaven?

Re: I'd go with Betty

This is crazy. We're talking about going to bed with Wilma Flintstone.

You're right. We're nuts. This is an insane conversation.

She'll never leave Fred, and we know it.

Hack to school: Parents told to keep their little script kiddies in line

Re: Speaking of the 80's & BBC Micros .....

I didn't mention that the password grabber I developed was not a fake login screen, but was the same as yours in that it pulled the password (in the clear) off the network as it went past.

Speaking of the 80's & BBC Micros .....

I happened to go to a school and a college that were in the pilot for the Computers for Schools project in the early 80's. This meant that I had access to a computer room with a dozen BBCs at a time when most schools only had a single machine.

Ours were running ENet rather than EcoNet, which meant that they had a central (BBC Micro) server for the admin rather than allowing the 'admin' software to be run from any of the machines.

We developed a password grabber, cracked the file storage system on the MASSIVE 20MB hard drive, and finished by obtaining a complete list of all user passwords!

Ah, the joys of youth!

BOFH: These office thefts really take the biscuit

Re: When I were a young lad...

In one job, about 30 years ago, the building owner brought in a coffee vending machine. And were charging 50p a cup .... for really shite coffee.

I worked out that I could acquire Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee beans, at around £30/pound, and it would still work out significantly cheaper than the really shite vending machine coffee.

‘IT manager’ needed tech support because they had never heard of a command line

Managers having souls?!? When did this happen?

----------> Typical manager!

Nano11 cuts Windows 11 down to size, grabbing just 2.8 GB of disk space

I always thought .....

..... that the smallest Win11 install was here!

Playing ball games in the datacenter was obviously stupid, but we had to win the league

And then the Aussies decided to flame us for it ....... and we ended up with the Ashes!

-------> Mine is the one that goes out when it is in, and in when it is out! And has a label that says 'Silly Mid On'!

Techie ended vendor/client blame game by treating managers like toddlers

Not always their fault. We had a leased line that would go down overnight (when not used) and the current hitting the (as we found out later) dry joint caused by BT checking the line was enough to get it working again. They finally left a 'tap' in place, and the next time it went down they were able to verify and agree that the line had an issue. It still took a while to locate and fix, but that was just the time it took to localise the dry joint.

Ex-NASA chief: China likely to land humans on Moon before Uncle Sam does again

Hang on!

Don't you mean 20th July 2029? I thought you meant the 60th anniversary of Apollo 11!

Did you pick that date for another reason?

I love the idea ...... unfortunately the moon is waning on that date, and only 5 days from a New Moon.

So unless they were going for 'footprints & flags', and taking off a short time after landing, then it's not a viable phase of the moon I'm afraid.

.

.

[edit] Unless they land on the far side of the Moon!!!!!

Now that really would trump the Merkins! Not only to reuse the date, but to go a step further in landing on the far side!

.

.

[edit squared] Forget this. I was thinking you meant the same date as Apollo 11.

BOFH: HR plays checkers, IT plays 5D chess

Elbow joints are a weak point in fluid transportation systems (pipes!) especially when the flow isn't uniform.

I've had water hammering take out plastic pipes at elbow joints before. Fortunately I was within hearing range, and the sound of the cistern valve closing didn't sound right, so I immediately investigated. The room concerned merely ended up wet, rather than flooding the entire floor.

Re: he's not enough of an idiot to wander too close to a full-height window that opens out ...

I was thinking more 'warped' than 'wicked'!

Re: The PFY still has a lot to learn

'I do wonder what the words "I've just got to nip up onto the roof to get something." suggest is in store for the boss'

I could (sub)frame an answer to your question .... but I'd much rather just observe the impact the Boss makes on arrival at his final destination.

Basic projector repair job turns into armed encounter at secret bunker

Re: Indiana National Guard not very guardy in comparison

I would not have been shocked if the driver had been in an Audi.

I would have been mildly surprised if it was neither a BMW or an Audi.

Re: How did you get in here?

And sometimes those floors are not full height!

Re: Lower ranking officers

I want to know who General Error is? And why is he reading my hard drive?

Did they have a good Michael Caine impersonator on site?

Re: Lower ranking officers

Drinking on duty! That'll be sorted by Corporal Punishment!

I shall only tip mine!

Teen interns brute-forced a disk install, with predictable results

Re: The real lesson here

Now they start at the 'bottom', and slurp their way to the top!

Re: Some things have to be learnt the hard way

I remember commenting about the neat black line a friend had drawn across his shed, and about 18 inches up each wall.

The friend then told me about forgetting to refit the fork oil drain screws on his (IIRC) CB250 wet-dream before he bumped it off the centre stand following a service!