* Posts by Totally not a Cylon

102 posts • joined 17 Nov 2018


Epic, Spotify, ProtonMail and pals rise up as one against Apple's 30% cut, call for end to Cupertino-style markets

Totally not a Cylon

Ask the users.

Or is that too much like common sense?

I suspect that quite a few Iphone users are like me & my mum; we have Iphones because of the 'walled garden' environment.

Yes, it's a pain when I've written something I want to run on my phone, but why should the whims of Epic (who are disliked for many reasons) get to wreck a nice system? Disruption is not good for the market....

Also would this mean that my Smart TV can now run any app I want to run?

Can I run an app from Sony on an LG?

Or a Ford app on a Mercedes car?

Or go into Waitrose and buy Asda SmartPrice products?

England's COVID-tracking app finally goes live after 6 months of work – including backpedal on how to handle data

Totally not a Cylon

Re: Scotland

Yes and we're calling it a Kermit.......

Something to look forward to: Being told your child or parent was radicalized by an AI bot into believing a bonkers antisemitic conspiracy theory

Totally not a Cylon

Asimov's Foundation series had something similar.

Trouble was all great speechs turned out to have zero content!

Totally not a Cylon

Re: Wibble... ...Out of Bags

Which M though?

It's important.

Zero. Zilch. Nada. That's how many signs of intelligent life astroboffins found in probe of TEN MILLION stars

Totally not a Cylon

He he, yeah we're all hiding from you......

Apart from those pesky maidens who keeping coming for parties......

We've heard some made-up stories but this is ridiculous: Microsoft Flight Simulator, Bing erect huge skyscraper out of bad data

Totally not a Cylon
Black Helicopters

Re: Roof

The ZX81 Flight sim had a better bug.....

Provided your wheels were down you could hit the ground at ANY speed and bounce, often to massive heights....

Someone made an AI that predicted gender from email addresses, usernames. It went about as well as expected

Totally not a Cylon

Re: 100% foolproof gender identification method

Works for ALL cases but does lead to some strange greetings......

"Hello Human type customer, how may I address you today?"

Black hole destroys corona

Totally not a Cylon
IT Angle

It's become a meme,

Blame Trump


Blame Boris


Blame Uncle Vlad......

Totally not a Cylon


for certain values of 'cure'

The patient is no longer suffering from Corona Virus....

Oh deer! Scotland needs some tech smarts to help monitor its rampant herbivore populations

Totally not a Cylon

Re: Reintroduce Wolves & Bears

Shepherds used to stay with their flock and have large dogs (look up Pyrenean Mountain Dog) to protect the flocks from bears, wolves & humans........

It's only the modern practice of letting the sheep run wild which leads to large predation....

Totally not a Cylon

Reintroduce Wolves & Bears

What could possibly go wrong?

And if they happen to munch on the 'other type of herbivore' well, it's probably going to improve the IQ of the population.....

White elephants in the mist: Google's upcoming Pixel 4A may ship without Soli motion recognition, per FCC filing

Totally not a Cylon

Gesture sense = bad

This ends up with President Zaphod having to sit perfectly still otherwise the radio changes channel......

Beware the fresh Windows XP install: Failure awaits you all with nasty, big, pointy teeth

Totally not a Cylon

Re: chewed wires

My cousin used to keep Chinchillas, they seemed to be attracted to any type of network cable even to the extent of climbing a vertical wall to get to them.

The damn things left the easily replaced mouse & keyboard cables alone, just the network cable which went upstairs......

And somehow they knew to not even nibble on mains cables....

Australia's contact-tracing app still basically borked on iOS, says new bug report – and GAPPLE API version tested

Totally not a Cylon
IT Angle

Re: some tech journalism please

Downvoted because:

Apple & Google have developed a way of doing this which doesn't compromise battery life (too much) or user privacy and yet various Governments wnat more tracking and are using a cobbled together centralised thing which actually breaks a few 'programming rules' for iOS.

All the Governements have to do is use the approved api and their trackers work, but they don't get to see the info which they desperately want for reasons unrelated to public health.

The fact Apple & Google have managed to work together should convince everyone to use the damn api they've made not cobble together their own.......

GitHub to replace master with main across its services

Totally not a Cylon

Just go full Weeb

and use Senpai & Kohai.

The the PC brigade can yell 'cultural appropriation' and the original users will say 'we don't care'......


Mistress & Maid......

Sony reveals PlayStation 5 will offer heretical no-optical-disk option. And yes, it has an AMD CPU-GPU combo

Totally not a Cylon

Leisure suit Larry

gets woke.

Sounds a hysterically funny game, provided they have the sense of humo(u)r to actually do it justice.......

Anyone else remember 'Leather Goddesses of Phobos'?

Zak McKraken & the Alien Mindbenders?

Some funny games with an extremely dodgy sense of humour......

EU aviation wonks give all-electric training aeroplane the green light – but noob pilots only have 50 mins before they have to land it

Totally not a Cylon

Re: Reserve power?

Can of Redbull?

It could be 'five to ten years' before the world finally drags itself away from IPv4

Totally not a Cylon

Time for Elon & Linus

Maybe Musk & Torvalds should be paid to develop IPv10?

After all, what could possibly go wrong.........

'Beyond stupid': Linus Torvalds trashes 5.8 Linux kernel patch over opt-in Intel CPU bug mitigation

Totally not a Cylon

Re: El Reg faux pas

Maybe she's telling him off for answering all the questions first.

He's got to give the other kids a chance......

And this is the Register.........

Apple promises third, no, fourth, er, fifth time's a charm when it comes to macOS Catalina: 10.15.5 now out

Totally not a Cylon

Re: Bizzarely

Another one with no problems, maybe it's because my Mac is an old 2013 MacBook Pro?

But then I don't have issues with Windows 10 releases either......

Or perhaps it's the Pi-Hole sitting on my network blocking all the iffy DNS requests?

(Or the dancing round a bonfire at Full Moon???)

Mirror mirror on the wall, why will my mouse not work at all?

Totally not a Cylon

Re: Foot switch

Not just sewing machines....

Audio typists had a foot switch for the tape machine.

The Great British anti-5G fruitcake Bakeoff: Group hugs, no guns, and David Icke

Totally not a Cylon
Paris Hilton

Re: Income

Of course you are....

You're a Cat, it says so right in your username.....

why don't we have a Cat icon? There's Paris but not the right kind of pussy.......

As Brit cyber-spies drop 'whitelist' and 'blacklist', tech boss says: If you’re thinking about getting in touch saying this is political correctness gone mad, don’t bother

Totally not a Cylon
Paris Hilton

Re: Please repaint Darth Vader in different color

Pink used to be a boy's colour and blue for girls....

Seriously, look it up.

One of the earliest references to this original color scheme appeared in a June of 1918 edition of the trade publication Earnshaw’s Infants’ Department,

The generally accepted rule is pink for the boys, and blue for the girls. The reason is that pink , being a more decided and stronger color, is more suitable for the boy, while blue, which is more delicate and dainty, is prettier for the girl.

Forget tabs – the new war is commas versus spaces: Web heads urged by browser devs to embrace modern CSS

Totally not a Cylon

Makes me wonder

How does LISP handle colo(u)r?

(Never had to use it, but know what it's called....)

Totally not a Cylon

Re: What's wrong with CGA?

There's always 8514/a,

nice & simple; would you like green or orange?

Totally not a Cylon

What's wrong with CGA?

Why does a website need any more colours than the CGA standard?

it even has 2 sets of colours for more choice....

Nobody needs more than 4 colours on a page!

OK brainiacs, we've got an IT cold case for you: Fatal disk errors on an Amiga 4000 with 600MB external SCSI unless the clock app is... just so

Totally not a Cylon

Reminds me of an ME upgrade.

Many, many years ago I was upgrading some no-name clones to Win ME.....

Had to turn off processor cache and keep my hand on the mouse, not moving it just resting on it. Take hand off mouse and instant installer crash.....

For 4 hours!!!!!!, pentiums get slow when you turn off the internal cache...

But it worked, system ran fine afterwards with all caches on.

Ofcom waves DAB radio licences under local broadcasters' noses as FM switchoff debate smoulders again

Totally not a Cylon


OFCOM can buy everyone a DAB+ Radio either for their car or home, which has equal function to what they currently use and then they can turn off analogue (British spelling).

Oh, and its all at the expense of the Board who want to turn off analogue, not the taxpayer......

Plus provide their personal number for when the system doesn't work...............

Remember Tapplock, the 'unbreakable' smart lock that was allergic to screwdrivers? The FTC just slapped it down for 'deceiving' folks

Totally not a Cylon

Re: Great Youtube Channel

Have you got to where he opens electronic safes with a fork?

Borky shark: A deserted airport and a Raspberry Pi feeling poorly at baggage claim. Welcome to 2020

Totally not a Cylon

Who knew a bowl of Petunias was sentient?

Hypochondriacs – are your eyes all blurry? It's just YouTube trying to cut video-stream quality worldwide amid the coronavirus pandemic

Totally not a Cylon
Paris Hilton

Virtue signalling.

It's just these companies being seen to be 'doing something', which actually costs them little.

If they really wanted to help people they could offer newer films to stream, reduce fees etc........

or open the back catalog of 80s & 90s TV shows, nice old VHS or DVD quality.......

What the game networks are doing makes more sense; reducing the bandwidth on an 110GB game download will help.

Tech won't save you from lockdown disaster: How to manage family and free time while working from home

Totally not a Cylon

Have a beer....

Though if you want to wind up this type of person just ask if they're sure that the workers who packed the wipes washed their hands after visiting the 'rest room'...........

Eight-core 3.8 GHz CPU. 12 TFLOPS GPU. 1TB NVME SSD. 16GB RAM. Not a half-decent workstation, it's the new Xbox

Totally not a Cylon

Re: "eliminate loading times between levels"

Quote: sometimes loading time can actually be used intelligently and be a valid part of the gaming experience.

Mass Effect elevators.........

running on a high end PC made them a LOT faster........

Totally not a Cylon

Can it run MUD?

a much tougher test for a console, does the keyboard work?

European electric vehicle sales surged in Q4 2019 but only accounted for wafer-thin slice of total car purchases

Totally not a Cylon

Range & Time for a FULL charge

When the range is 500miles and under an hour for a FULL charge then I'll be able to consider an electric vehicle.

Also why are they all single lead charging? Why not have multiple leads?

the more connections the lower the current per connection but the higher the total current.

Plus thinner leads are lighter to handle

Schermata blu di errore: Italy might be in lockdown, but the sh!tshow must go on

Totally not a Cylon

Re: Towel Day

Higher or lower dimensional than Green?

Morrisons puts non-essential tech changes on ice as panic-stricken shoppers strip stores

Totally not a Cylon

Re: "throughput of goods is in excess of the usual Christmas peak"

I hope you also remembered the correct biscuits.......

If not check Captain Coward's memo for which types are appropriate.

If you're wondering how Brit cops' live suspect-hunting facial-recog is going, it's cruising at 88% false positives

Totally not a Cylon
Black Helicopters

Trial it at Westminster

Only when this tech can accurately recognise all MPs and other workers at Westminster should it be allowed to go live on the public.

Or Metro Police HQ.

Let them be the guinea pigs and have their movements tracked........

Aw, look. The UK is still trying really hard to be the 'safest place to be online in the world'

Totally not a Cylon

Re: About time

Don't forget 'hamster dance'

plus ' Caramelldansen'....... (I dare you)

Totally not a Cylon

Re: Have you now or have you ever


Now what?

Young Jacob for IT Minister?

Totally not a Cylon


It worked for bikes why not social media?

Complete with a special section for stories from dear old Uncle Vlad..........

Artful prankster creates Google Maps traffic jams by walking a cartful of old phones around Berlin

Totally not a Cylon

Re: Ingenious

English or German version?

EU declares it'll Make USB-C Great Again™. You hear that, Apple?

Totally not a Cylon

Re: I know I'm weird

I have a total of 2 USB-C powered devices:

A Lumia 950XL yes a Windows Phone, happily running Windows for ARM


A RaspberryPi 4

And I have to say that from experience the lightning connector is much easier to plug in than USB-C and feels stronger..... (YMMV)

Totally not a Cylon

What's wrong with a round power connector?

Just standardise on a proper barrel power connector.....

5.5mm diameter, those ones....

Have the nice side effect of making the damn phone thick enough to hold properly!

US hands UK 'dossier' on Huawei: Really! Still using their kit? That's just... one... step... beyond

Totally not a Cylon
Paris Hilton

Porn & Cat piccys

As the title says.

Do we really care who is looking at all the Porn & Cat pictures that 5G mobile users are looking at?

Windows 7 and Server 2008 end of support: What will change on 14 January?

Totally not a Cylon

Pot meet Kettle

I wonder how many of you lot complaining about 'Windows Telemetry' also have android phones?

You know; the phones which send everything to Google.......

I still have the install disks for OS/2 perhaps that is better?

Smart speaker maker Sonos takes heat for deliberately bricking older kit with 'Trade Up' plan

Totally not a Cylon

Right to repair?

I smell a lawsuit incoming.....

Seeing as Europe and a few US States have 'right to repair' laws, how would a judge interpret this action?

LightAnchors array: LEDs in routers, power strips, and more, can sneakily ship data to this smartphone app

Totally not a Cylon

Re: Yes, but for what?

It is so your Toaster can let you know just before it pops the toast out.....

Register Lecture: Can portable atomic clocks end UK dependence on GNSS?

Totally not a Cylon

Re: first lecture of the decade

IT people count from zero, though.

So is 1 or 0 actually the first number?

Found on Mars: Alien insects... or whatever the hell this smudge is supposed to be, anyway

Totally not a Cylon

Site visit needed?

All these people claiming to have proof/evidence of life on Mars should be offered (voluntold) a trip to Mars to check in person.

Might cut down on all the hype.

Personally, I believe something will be found but it will be fossils or organic residue, aka oil.....

Or we could find a Prothean base and then we're screwed



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