Posts by Dan Beshear

Cassini spots MEGA-METHANE SEAS on the north pole of Titan

Re: Down to just "4 per cent of its maneuvering propellant"

Gotta have oxidizer too for it to burn.

PLAGUE of SEX CRAZED MONSTER GRASSHOPPERS to hit East Coast

Re: Noisy little buggers...

Problem with that hypothesis is that the little bastards come out here EVERY YEAR.

Try again?

Anonymity ZUCKS: Facebook's Instagram to switch on face tagging

Re: Curse you Jasper Hamill!

And this is different how?

How long will it take Facebook Home to hit 1bn downloads? 76 years

How many of Facebook's "one billion" are …

… from people with multiple accounts for games, affairs, stalking, FORGETTING, etc.

Against Facebook's TOS? *SHOCK* Tell that to my 11-year old with three accounts and none of them under her name.

Inuit all along: Pirate Bay flees Sweden for Greenland

You wouldn't be waiting for a full moon, just for moonrise.

There would be a built-in minimum 2.6 second lag for information to get to the moon and back. We all know someone would constantly be complaining about the laws of physics and how they should be repealed, a Yank of course.

(Disclaimer: Yank until I figure out where to go to hide from all my student loans. Then ex-Yank.)

Re: I don't even use TPB...

>Some smart business men/women must have thought of this?

Unfortunately, they aren't the holders of the copyrights. Idiots tend to hold them.

News Corp prez threatens to pull Fox TV off the air

Re: FOX ≠ FOX News

It would be a really stupid decision, because Fox itself owns many of its larger-market TV stations, like KDFW Dallas, KTTV in Los Angeles, and oddly enough WNYW in New York. Either these stations go dark, or Fox has to BUY content for these television stations.

Back to Blazing Saddles references: The Sheriff has a gun to his own head, yelling "Nobody moves, or the n***** gets it!" And the citizens of Rock Ridge are too stupid to call his bluff.

Re: *please*

Please Murdoch, pull, like your father should have.

Oi, Microsoft, where's my effin' toolbar gone?

Re: So what else is new?

Make sure it's unicorn blood and not HORSE blood.

Adware-flinging Yontoo yahoos target Mac users: You like trailers, right fanboi?

Re: That'll upset the Apple Cart(el)

How much? I'll bet it won't stop any such boast.

Fanbois aren't really in danger. It's the grannies that believe everything they read from the computer screen that are in danger with them.

This page has been deliberately left blank

Re: Smuggling tadpoles

Would you prefer that she were smuggling plums?

Carrie Fisher dusts off THAT bikini for Star Wars VII

Re: It's called experience, not age!

Yeah, Ford turned *70* last summer, and all the stunt-work of the past is catching up with him now.

Re: "Elderly"?

Tell you what. YOU tell Mrs. Crenshaw from the movie Sorority Row that she doesn't look hot when she's pointing that shotgun in YOUR face.

I will tell her ANYTHING she wants to hear.

Simply nobody is rushing to beat the Microsoft licencing price hike

It is just the 28th ...

If there is a mass crush, it'll be Saturday.

Or they'll just claim they're Yanks and dodge it altogether.

Facebook replaces non-Facebook mail addresses on Timeline

Re: Calm down dears....

I guess I'm still missing the point of the brouhaha.

You've had an @facebook.com address since you signed up for Facebook all those years ago. Any spammer worth a sh¡t (granted this qualifier would exclude 99% of them) should have already been spamming this email address. I haven't seen any spam in the Messages. None.

I just checked my email addresses in Facebook. The Facebook.com address is NOT my primary address, in contradiction to this report.

Sounds like more bitching just to be bitching.

Facebook fesses up to Face.com face finder financing

Hopefully this batch of facial-recognition software can distinguish between Zuckhead and his sister. See http://preview.tinyurl.com/3ogomdf for a memory jog from last summer.

How to get a job in Australia

Forgotten downside

You forgot about all the animals there that are DEADLY. Half the world's venomous creatures live in Australia.

Adam Sandler's cross-dresser shocker is Razzies stonker

Re: Revoke Sandler's oxygen privileges for a week

While we revoking oxygen privileges, I have a list and they will never be missed.

You should limit your statement to Marlon and Shawn's crap. The older kids made some awesome stuff back in the day ('80s-early '90s).

Parents shocked by priestly PowerPoint pr0n

Re: Wow...

We're fleshing out the better points of humor before attacking the self-righteous hypocrisy that is religion. We'll get to the vitriol soon enough, just keeping refreshing.

HTC sues fans for premature unboxing

Re: nda

The REAL Mike Judge would have RTFA'd. Quit using the boss's login, Beavis.

AOL joins advertiser exodus from Rush Limbaugh

Re: He'll get his pink slip soon enough.

Actually, Limbaugh keeps more listeners and makes more money under Democratic administrations than Republican. There's more willing to listen to you when you the voice of the opposition. So the worst thing (other than being dropping by the syndicator) is for Obama to lose. Then he loses what little relevancy he's had.

Duff Mars probe's flaming shards to rain down mid-January

271.74 days, more precisely ...

90% decays in 902.70 days, 90% of what's left in the next 902.70 days, etc. So 1% of it will still be present in 5 years, but it is 10 µg = 1.1*10^17 atoms to start with, to be spread out over a large debris field (thousands of hectares), probably not to worry.

Microsoft copies Google with silent browser updates

Not just healthcare ...

There are other industry who workhorse applications REQUIRE NON-COMPLIANT browsers. Many Multiple-Listed Service apps for the real-estate industry are still stuck with IE7 or IE6 requirements.

Now Russians can't even contact their busted Mars probe

Russia is Mars-jinxed

In 50 years of trying, the Russians have NEVER had a successful Mars mission. Several never left Earth orbit, other lost communication in transit, several crashed, three or four actually landed, and 1 even sent signals for 20 seconds before going kerchunk.

At some point, you gotta stop and stick with what you know you can do.

UK Govt refuses to ban shale gas 'fracking'

Difference in layers

Frakking happens more than 1000 feet below ground. Wells used for drinking water are rarely more than 250 feet deep. Flammable well water existed before frakking due to pockets of natural gas close to the surface. This should be a non-issue, but has been blown WAY out of proportion by sheer ignorance.

Evil '666' auto-whaler tool is even eviler than it seems

well ...

Easy, 1 for you and 99 for me. If you give the thief 1% of the data instead of 100%, how are they going to know they're getting ganked?

Apple to release Mac OS X Lion on Wednesday

"Apple buys M$"

If ONLY it were true.

Ballmer's breaking point: Is Windows 8 already too late?

Well, you asked for it

Boo Radley, you're a Luddite.

US state bans Netflix, Napster password sharing

The US ...

... itself will be the prison. It's the real reason why the wall is going up on the Mexican border, not to keep the Mexicans out but to keep the Americans in.

When they start building a Canadian wall, you better already be out of here.

Police ROBOT attacks and BURNS DOWN HOUSE

Why yes

Yes, you are.

Sony's Thai website pwned by phisher scoundrels

Sony, Sony-US, doesn't matter

Ain't none of them smart enough to properly operate a sharp stick.

Remastered 4K, 3D Titanic steams towards cinemas

I was hoping this was a hoax.

Now the missus is going to want to see it again at the moviehouse. The water gushing into the people-tank was bad enough in a cold theater in 2D, I don't even want to think about in 3D, no matter how crappy the transition is.

Kate Winslet in 3D wouldn't compensate, unless the movie freeze-framed right there. Maybe not even then.

Facebook pulls plugs on Mark Zuckerberg’s Facebook profile

How to talk to someone at Facebook

Buy advertising. Probably works for talking to the bigshots at El Reg too, but at least Andrew or Lester will email you back if you sound like you have a clue.

Plague of US preachers falsely claim to be Navy SEALs

There is a reason ...

... that Jesus referred to his followers as "his sheep" (John 10:27). Too many Christians will believe anything they're told if the "preacher" says so.

@Naughtyhorse: Complete agreement.

ACS:Law fined for data breach

It is the Editor's

JOB to cherry pick the news, Coward. Not all news is the same. Unfiltered news is a lot of work for those who have better things to do. I don't have time to sort out corporate dung press releases (which pass for 'news' in the old media) from actual investigation and reporting. That why the Editor gets to be the Editor, and this is why most of us read El Reg.

Hideout of thieves and pirates? Not hardly. Gathering place for people who like to read about arrogant dipshits getting just what they deserve? Since 1998.

Sony mulls hacker bounty offer

To the Sony apologists

Keep giving me those Thumbs Down, Sony Suck-ups. It won't change the fact that Sony is too stupid to operate a sharp stick.

Keep poking that badger, Sony

It's never smart to keep taunting those who've already kicked your sorry butt once and publicly.

Instead of hinting at bounties, you would be better served in HIRING the preps instead. At least THEY knew where the security holes were, and probably still are, plus a few they HAD NOT YET discuss with the rest of the legion.

Just because they're made of badger paws doesn't mean they can't still slice you open if you're stupid enough to play with them.

Mozilla refuses US request to ban Firefox add-on

You must be a Yank

Cubans don't speak Anglish. You must have failed for what passes as American geography.

You forget...

that this is the United States. Uncle Sham just killed bin Laden and thinks he can do whatever he damn well pleases. Court order? Bah, just bypass those Commie bastards.

I'm looking for a good place to emigrate. I'm looking for a low debt-to-GDP ratio, a lack of extradition to the US, Anglish-speaking, and preferably semi-tropical to tropical climate.

Legal goons threaten researcher for reporting security bug

There's a reason for that ...

Opening the Calculator has been the standard of proof-of-concept proof since Windows 98, maybe even before that. Opening anything else would have made the shysters' point for them, instead of letting them prove their own buffoonery.

US proposes online IDs for Americans

More Utopian nonsense

So what happens when Aunt Mildred hands out her information to help launder money from that long lost relative in Nigeria? How about when the less-than-secured-as-promised system gets hacked into? (My money is on 75-90 minutes after going live.) And how much will this über-Net system cost? Hopefully the costs come from the subscribers (corporate and human), but knowing how the US is going lately it'll be free for the $1M+ bunch and $49.99 per month for the <$1M for us teeming masses.

Call me when the Uncle Sham figures out how he's going to avoid Chinese & Saudi foreclosure in 2016.

Facebook closes today ... NOT!

Time reclaimation

And here I was hoping to recover my daily time allocation to Mafia Wars and Mobsters and put it to actual good use. Meh. Someone just hitlisted me G2G!

What will we do with 600MHz?

US don't use 606-614 MHz

Here that frequency range (channel 37 on our system, 38 on UK's) is reserved for astronomic observation studies, like this http://articles.adsabs.harvard.edu/cgi-bin/nph-iarticle_query?bibcode=1972AJ.....77..115T&db_key=AST&page_ind=0&data_type=GIF&type=SCREEN_VIEW&classic=YES

I don't know specifically what energy transition happens in that frequency range, but apparently it was considered important enough to prohibit terrestrial transmission in that range.

RadioShack franchises go gunning for business

You're behind the curve this time

El Reg is my source for news on the latest, the greatest, the worst, and the OMGWTFBBQ, usually 12-36 hours before traditional media catch on to the story. This time you folks are 2 weeks BEHIND the news curve. This news item broke here on 25 March, and you're just now reporting on it?!?!

BTW demographics has ALWAYS been about profiling and pigeon-holing (not to be confused with pigeon-eating or corn-holing). The judgment in the use of the demographic data determines whether racism is involved.

Vanilla Ice to tackle panto Captain Hook

Isn't TOMORROW ...

April Fool's Day? Sounds like someone is getting an early start on it. No peeking, leave the present wrapped until 0000 UTC at least, it's only 8 more hours.

Capitalism killed the Martians, suggests Hugo Chavez

Does not grok

Someone done gone cuckoo for Coco Puffs. I think he's trying out for Sean Combs's old spot on Faux News.

Chinese man jailed for provoking nuke panic

They should do this in the US

Maybe they can get people to quit blindly passing along crazy aunt Gertrude's chain letter.

Apollo 11 moon mission reincarnated as website

Scarier

Scarier to think that YOUR CELL PHONE most likely has far more processing power than the computer that actually got them to the moon in the first place.