The Register Home Page

* Posts by DoctorPaul

415 publicly visible posts • joined 24 Jul 2018

Page:

Microsoft cancels Patch Tuesday for some Dell users over surprise shutdowns, overheating devices

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: Not a Dell

Updated two Win10 boxes and a Win11 laptop yesterday and seem to have got away with it, glad I upgraded to a fibre connection a few months ago though!

In associated news I also received the email from M$ to say that the Win10 boxes will get ESU until October 2027. Just trying to work out whether that's good or bad news.

Edit: as of today all the forum pages are now only occupying the left third of the screen on my Android tablet, way to go with that site redesign El Reg!

Philips to replace bricked Hue Bridge Pro devices

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

That would be the driver assist that tries to kill cyclists when you pull out to overtake them right?

User crippled a network while trying to learn Nmap

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: Trashed PC learning AutoCAD Animator

Was that the software that stored animations as a "flic file"? The format that AutoDesk discontinued just before it would have been a brilliant alternative to Flash for animations on the early(ish) internet?

Still, I earned a few quid back in the day writing the FlicPlayer component for Dephi, someone from IBM even bought a copy! Happy days.

Brit supermarket giant triples down on facial recog to nab shoplifters

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

I read it as something that all of us should do BEFORE we get caught up. Added bonus of clogging up their systems as they process the requests.

Maybe someone should put up a website where you get asked for the details and it spits out the necessary legalese for you to use.

Even the Secret Service won't use company-issued phones

DoctorPaul Bronze badge
Joke

Surely the answer is obvious

The Secret Service should be using GrapheneOS

Ordering a trip back to 2009, with a side of nostalgia

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: God's waiting room

When I was at uni in Brighton in the 70s we called Worthing the Costa Geriatrica.

Germany went off the rails as wireless outage saw all trains cancelled

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: Working tirelessly

Anyone old enough to remember the Wheeltappers and Shunters Club on the telly all those years ago?

The wheeltappers would go around doing just that, in order to detect cracked wheels on the rolling stock that would cause damage to the track from the repeated hammering they gave it.

Fast forward to the brave new world of privatisation and the train companies no longer bother as "hey, we don't have to pay to maintain the track"

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: SNAFU

British Rail toast cooked under a gas grill was an epicurean delight!

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: SNAFU

That chimes with my limited experience of using Dutch and Belgian trains to get to gigs by various "modern beat combos" over the years. The Dutch international railway website is pretty darn good as well.

A quick comparison of rail replacement bus services. Last time I had to use one in Kent, a bus had left just minutes before the train from London arrived and there was a wait of over half an hour until the next one turned up. It then proceeded to trundle through the countryside calling at each station on the route in turn.

A few years ago I turned up at a Dutch station to find there was no sign of my onward connection. Brief moment of panic, then a friendly platform attendant told me there was a replacement bus service and directed me to the well-signposted route out to the carpark. Standing there were individual coaches which then travelled directly to each of the stations affected by the closure. The fares are more than reasonable as well.

Digital indigestion: Fizzy Coca-Cola display chokes on full storage

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: Not sure of instructions...

Tell you what, why don't you try it both ways and let us know how you get on?

Microsoft Access finally breaks free of its 22-inch form limit

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: Gets a bad rap

OMG the flashbacks!

Back in the day I had (or so I thought) a nice little gig as a freelancer for an upmarket consultancy taking the home-brewed Access databases they had developed and porting them to MySQL. Found some nice freeware conversion scripts that did a lot of the grunt work, mixed in some scripts of my own to parse various things and job's a goodun.

First three jobs or so went like a dream, scripts did 95% of the work, thought I had it nailed, quoted for the next one. That's when I found out that Access did something that MySQL couldn't. I've applied the mind bleach to the whole sorry episode but it was something like being able to use a query as a variable inside another query. Cue working right across Christmas and New Year disassembling and refactoring horrendous wizard-generated queries by hand.

We live and learn.

LLMs are closer to religion than they appear. Watch out for those who like it that way

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: "young earth creationists believe it’s 600 years old."

Upvoted to cancel the downvote.

What the Catholic Church did to the Cathars (and others) was not at all nice (massive understatement).

When Beziers fell after the siege they weren't sure who were heretics and who were ordinary Catholics. Their solution? "Kill them all, God will know his own".

AIs don't like religion – particularly Jehovah's Witnesses, study claims

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: Full disclosure, I am an atheist, but ...

For me the distinction is simple. I am spiritual not religious.

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: And they're Surprised?

On the occasions where I've unfortunately opened the door to these people I have a stock response - "I'm sorry, I'm not in the market for a new belief system, I'm perfectly happy with the one I've got." - and close the door.

That system is a sort of combination of Taoism and heresy (in a Religious Studies essay aged 12 or so I proposed that Man created God in his own image, didn't go down well) with a particular soft spot for the Cathars of the 12th century. Decided it was probably best not to debate the matter with the hard of thinking, even if it is tempting to hit them with the likes of Gnostic dualism.

California may let Linux bypass age check

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: One response: Strike.

Got mine in 1968 when I was 16, back then you could ride a motorbike up to 250cc. In "the good old days" there was no limit so my uncle jumped straight onto a 650cc twin. And promptly put it through a hedge.

On-call techie decided job was done and hit the bottle – just before his pager went off

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: "I can't remember the name of the wine we were drinking"

An interesting inversion of the old classic "I can't remember the place, I can't remember the girl, but by God the wine was Chambertin!"

Microsoft makes Copilot easier to summon, harder to ignore in Office

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: To summon copilot ...

You might be in for an unpleasant surprise.

Pretty sure it was a "perpetual" copy of Office 2010 that I had, but when I tried to reinstall it years ago it wouldn't activate as Microshit had turned off the activation servers.

We've only gone and done it: Changed what you're used to

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: Some things still seem broken

Today's (12th May) email has another broken link. Email article about Microsoft finding AI can't do long tasks takes you to a web site article about Israeli firm Lightbits. Not good enough El Reg.

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Some things still seem broken

Happened to look at the site on my phone instead of my tablet and I see what people mean when they say that the new design seems over-focussed on that particular format.

In the meantime, yesterday's email never arrived. Got one today (my normal way to access El Reg is read the email and click on any stories that interest me) but when I clicked on an article about Anthropic and a single click exploit I got taken to a story about Union Jacks and dog poo!

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: Glad I read the archive link

Many thanks and an upvote for that, I will be heading there as soon as I've finished wading through all these comments - there are a lot of criticisms that I want to upvote!

The new look reminds me of YouTube's "throw a load of shit at a wall and see what sticks" approach to design.

And while I'm here, it's 2pm here in the UK and the daily email is yet to land in my inbox.

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: Too small

You mean like bog-standard HTML used to do all those years ago? Welcome to the future.

Brit mathematician lets AI agent loose with credit card – cue password leaks, CAPTCHA chaos and more

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

She's also got a cracking sense of humour, if her appearances on Have I Got News For You are anything to go by. Including her take on the current incumbent of the White House.

Where to buy a non-Apple, non-Google smartphone

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

The latest Volvo advert that I've seen features a woman using Google Assistant to compose a message to her estranged father. And that's it, no mention whatsoever of the actual car. WTF?

Microsoft fixes VS Code after app gives Copilot credit for human's work

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

One small ray of hope in the article

Despite their many appalling failures around the issue of actually paying claims, insurance companies have literally centuries of experience in dispassionately assessing risk.

Now if they all just say "we won't cover you if you use AI" what are businesses to do?

Microsoft's bad obsession is showing up in shabby services and slipshod software. Here's proof

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

The phrase that comes to mind is

Not fit for purpose.

Hope your holiday was horrid: You botched the last thing you did before leaving

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: name? DHCP? I can go lower than that

You plonker. Not you, Rodney.

User found the perfect formula to make Excel misbehave

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: Analogue clocks

Seem to recall that a few passengers either missed the sailing of their cruise or arrived a day early when the sailing time was given as midnight on the nth of the month. Pretty sure that they now always depart at 23:55 or 00:05 on a given date for the avoidance of doubt.

Firefox maker torches Google for building Prompt API into browser

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: Too late

Upvoted for recommending Qwant, they run their own index and are based in France where there seems to be a positive attitude to personal privacy. Has worked well for me for a couple of years now, just one sponsored ad at the top of each page. AI slop is available but you have to choose to use it. My default setup is Firefox with uBlock Origin and Privacy Badger, search set to Qwant. Oh and routed via ProtonVPN "just because".

Microsoft boss tells investors the company is working to 'win back fans'

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: Fans! Fans! Fans!

Not so fond memories of the sanibroyeur in a French gite, referred to by us Brits as the shit shredder. Designed to get your dump through a 15mm pipe, one matchstick (it was the 1980s) dropped down the toilet would back things up rather unpleasantly.

GoDaddy customer claims registrar transferred 27-year-old domain without any security checks

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Upvoted, MB seem to be a modern unicorn - cheap, reliable and honest. Yes, you can have all three!

I moved my handful of sites to them when my current provider (taken over once already with the accompanying reduction in quality) was subsumed into the GoDaddy empire. As well as the inevitable crash in performance, I refuse to do business with people who slaughter wild animals and post photos of them and the carcasses online.

During the transfer I had identical mailboxes with a few thousand emails open in adjacent tabs in Firefox, one on the old domain, the other on the new MB account, so I did a quick test by doing a search on each mailbox in turn. MB returned a result in about 30 seconds, the GoDaddy site span it's wheels for a couple of minutes then timed out.

Trump to UK: Stop taxing our big beautiful tech corps or face tariff tsunami

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: He's no richer than he'd have been

I refer you to the extra-judicial murder by USAsian forces of *alleged* drug-running boats in the Caribbean and Pacific.

Thunderbird in hand worth 2 Outlooks as fresh FOSS fave and Firefox arrive

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

"That's no bad thing: for instance, at the time of writing, the macOS version of the latest Adobe Reader is a hefty 762 MB download."

Surely the biggest issue is that it's written by Adobe.

Attention, gamers: The FAA wants YOU to be an air traffic controller

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Not an entirely bad idea, but not for ATC

I can think of a couple of examples where recruiting gamers has seemed to work:

1. I believe Ukraine have found gamers make excellent drone and robot truck controllers, not to mention anyone who was already a drone racer. Strikes me as a big improvement on, say, the Battle of Britain where your ace pilot could be blown out of the sky at any moment.

2. Sim racers often do extremely well when placed in a real racing car. Doesn't surprise me in the least, on a sim (excluding the megabuck ones that the F1 teams use) you have nothing but visual feedback with maybe a bit of sound. Take an actual car round a race track and you are working with oodles of physical feedback as well - pretty sure one guy just said "this is so fucking easy compared to a sim".

Depends on the game I guess, maybe they should try online chess players or similar?

Notepad sheds Copilot from toolbar as Microsoft gives subtlety a try

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

And yet Microslop are running TV adverts asking you to run your business based on the output from Copilot for Excel. Cognitive dissonance doesn't even begin to cover it, how bent does advertising have to be before it's deemed illegal? (Rhetorical question obvs)

Digital sovereignty isn't just a buzzword – it's the future

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: Who's sickest of Trump?

And now he's alienated the god-botherers with that demented AI image of him as Christ, just after dissing the Pope. I wonder how that sits with "I'm a Catholic" J D Vacuous? Speaking of which, his visit to Hungary did wonders for Orban's re-election, not!

Booking.com warns reservation data may have checked out with intruders

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Been using that system for decades, currently with the excellent Mythic Beasts. One mailbox with catch-all redirection, with non-existent addresses that receive spam added to a block list if they get too annoying. Using the RoundCube webmail client it's the work of moments to define an "identity" so I can reply to emails with a From: theirco@mydomain whatever that may be. All that's left is to use Thunderbird to back up the mailbox locally.

We know what day it is but these Raspberry Pi price hikes are no joke

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: My Pi 4Bs are currently unused

Sounds perfect for a pair of pi-holes. Mine are running on a pair of 3Bs and have been faultless for many years, including the recent addition of unbound so my DNS is completely independent.

Elon Musk wants to build 50 times more chips than the world currently produces, using 'new physics'

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

I sometimes think that the whole USA is basically a film set.

Struggling to put your AI aversion into words? Here's a handy glossary

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: An interesting social phenomenon

Reminds me of when I did a Google search for Linux distributions that don't use systemd, must have been a while ago as I only use Qwant these days.

Number three in the AI generated list was Mint.

Microsoft 365 pauses Copilot creep after admins cry foul

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

OneDrive panic

Not directly related, but a few days ago I got an email from Microshit warning me that my storage space was 80% full and did I want to upgrade?

Cue complete panic. I run just two Win10 machines (finally had to give up Win7), have never ever knowingly used OneDrive and always use a local account, just logging in once every 60 days and immediately switching back to local to maintain ESU. The idea that the bastards had slyly siphoned off my private documents at some point was not a pleasant one.

Logged into my account at microsoft.com and, huge relief, OneDrive usage was 0%. So WTF was that about?

BOFH: What physics defines as impossible, sales calls a challenge

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: What physics defines as impossible, sales calls a challenge.

Have to say kudos to the multimedia firm that I freelanced for in the 80s. They noticed that I had a knack of being able to explain stuff to non-teccies and ended up sending me out as "technical support" on sales visits with Sales Director. My actual role was to make sure that he didn't offer stuff we couldn't deliver.

Slight side note, it didn't end well. After a couple of years they persuaded me to become a permie. Nothing changed but I was now an employee. Three months later I was signed off sick with stress and high blood pressure, never worked as an employee again and all the happier for it.

Microsoft Copilot now boarding your health information

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: No freaking way

Not commenting on it's efficacy or lack of, but I think you'll find that traditional Chinese medicine pre-dates Mao just a little. Like a few thousand years.

Retro tech fan views LaserDisc movie data with a budget microscope

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

My first foray into multimedia

Fond memories of working on full-screen multimedia in the 1980s using a combination of BBC Micro, add-on interface card and laserdisc player. The player was controlled from the BBC (serial link?), its output fed into the interface card and overlaid with the graphics output from the beeb.

We made titles like training applications and interactive quizzes with full-screen video, such as a maze quest where the disc contained video clips of every section of a real maze.

Being analogue made things interesting, none of this "start playing video from this precise memory location" - you told it to seek to a required track, but the head would overshoot and rebound slightly so there had to be a fudge factor in the code.

Bcachefs creator insists his custom LLM is female and 'fully conscious'

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

As Delain so poetically put it "Normal is not the norm, it's just a uniform".

It's been shown that if you are completely average in every way then you are actually a statistical freak or don't even exist. Examples (thanks QI) are:

1. USAF's attempt to design a universal pilot's seat for jet fighters. Measured every pilot, took the average, seat didn't fit anyone.

2. Advertising campaign in Australia to find the average Australian housewife. Crunched all the numbers, noone could be found who matched the criteria.

Burger King turns to AI to flame broil employees who aren't friendly enough

DoctorPaul Bronze badge
Joke

Re: Guest Experience

I've said it before but In-N-Out, really?

Always provokes images of the Out part of the process for me, which does little for my appetite.

Microsoft to auto-launch Copilot in Edge whenever you click a link from Outlook

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: Well that lasted long

Well, probably not that fussed as they've used the OPM principle. (Other People's Money)

AI chatbots waffle on GOV.UK queries, then get facts wrong when told to zip it

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

"we need to understand where the technology can be trusted and where it cannot,"

Well that's simple then, it can't be trusted anywhere.

Any more questions?

Linus Torvalds and friends tell The Reg how Linux solo act became a global jam session

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: Missed it all

Now that does take me back!

I put together the Windows 3 software stack that early UK ISP Nethead used to supply to their customers. Winsock, Netscape, Eudora, an FTP client and a menu/control panel to hook it all together.

Windows 3, so it couldn't have been my favourite IDE ever, Delphi, must have been Turbo Pascal for Windows.

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: Amazing, the article actually mentioned GNU

You do realise that you're coming across as someone with a massive axe to grind don't you? Rhetorical question of course.

I don't owe an allegiance to any particular operating system, but what gave me a nice warm feeling about the article was how friendliness and cooperation between individuals could achieve so much.

And then you had to remind us of the dark side of the "community". Just wanted to ask - did you enjoy a good flame war back in the day?

Ireland joins regulator smackdown after X's Grok AI accused of undressing people

DoctorPaul Bronze badge

Re: Am I the only one ...

"Hell, no".

I've actually said that out loud to that particular advert. Except I didn't say "Hell".

Page: