* Posts by Ken Shabby

297 posts • joined 7 Apr 2018

Page:

US Space Force deploys robot dogs at Cape Canaveral base

Ken Shabby
Alert

Re: The base in Florida?

I’d go analog, in a swamp up to to your arse in alligators has to be a bad day.

Bad news, older tech workers: Job advert language works against you

Ken Shabby
Headmaster

Re: Goodbye Old Sausage....

Where do I sign?

Computer glitches harmed 'nearly 150' patients after Oracle Cerner system go-live

Ken Shabby

Re: Umm…

Radio buttons that require more than one item to be selected.

Preparing for Skylab: The separate 1972 experimental mission that never left the ground

Ken Shabby
Pint

Bag of piss

We call that wine in Aus

NASA's Lunar Orbiter spots comfortably warm 'pits' all over the Moon

Ken Shabby
Headmaster

Re: Not Lava Tubes

Lancaster bombers mate, trust me. It was in a quality paper years ago, they knew how to break an exclusive back then.

After 40 years in tech, I see every innovation contains its dark opposite

Ken Shabby
Megaphone

Re: Speech recognition...

As this demonstrates

Scottish Elevator - Voice Recognition

Being declared dead is automated, so why is resurrection such a nightmare?

Ken Shabby

Re: The title is optional

Brown-Breads

First-ever James Webb Space Telescope image revealed

Ken Shabby

Re: Pffft

Not as small as a shed, that picobarn is a terashed

"barn to shed conversion"

Pentester says he broke into datacenter via hidden route running behind toilets

Ken Shabby
Childcatcher

Re: I thought that pentesters spent their days...

Cross Shite Scripting

BOFH: HR's gold mine gambit – they get the gold and we get the shaft

Ken Shabby
Flame

Re: Out of all these...

Perhaps he was going against the grain and his business ended up toast.

Lonestar plans to put datacenters in the Moon's lava tubes

Ken Shabby
Holmes

Re: Soup Dragon

The incumbent Cloud might have a word or two about it as well.

Cars in driver-assist mode hit a third of cyclists, all oncoming cars in tests

Ken Shabby
Alert

Re: So technology works as intended...

If they did they would call it “Death Race 2000 mode”

September 16, 1992, was not a good day to be overly enthusiastic about your job

Ken Shabby

Re: Regomiser a bit confused?

Matt Black - Wednesday

Autonomous Mayflower to attempt Atlantic crossing, again

Ken Shabby
Pint

A Schooner

Here in New South Wales, that is 3/4 of this ------>

Robots are creepy. Why trust AIs that are even creepier?

Ken Shabby
Holmes

Re: Ahhh, smug mode.

I'm pink, therefore I'm spam.

Not to dis your diskette, but there are some unexpected sector holes

Ken Shabby
Facepalm

Re: You were lucky

No, they are A-holes

The wild world of non-C operating systems

Ken Shabby
Alert

Re: Fortran

PRIMOS also had SP/L, another PL/1 variant. Lots of PMA, Prime Macro Assembler., They were moving to Modula 2

As for C well Primes did not have byte addressing, Prime ASCII had the top bit set and null pointers were not 0.

Hackers weigh in on programming languages of choice

Ken Shabby

Re: 93 percent have five or more years of programming experience

Only 47 years, but my first computer is literally in a museum, CDC 6600, now in the Science Museum in London, unsure if on show now.

MNF Fortran Scope OS. Sent punch cards (IBM port-a-punch) by post, print out came back the following week, First program Taylor Maclaurin series.

One guy, got it right first time, not me, a syntax error.

IBM files IP lawsuit against mainframe migration firm

Ken Shabby
Coffee/keyboard

Re: My mistake

Can you connect the Selectric, golf ball, console?

Unable to write 'Amusing Weekly Column'. Abort, Retry, Fail?

Ken Shabby
Alert

Re: Turbo Pascal - Missing Semi-Colon at line 454

PRIMOS had a line editor spectacularly called ED, internally we had a more functional and friendly version called X.ED.

The command to go to the lats line the file was B, however, if you were already on the last line it would print an error message.

-----:B

Bad Bottom

Saving a loved one from a document disaster

Ken Shabby
Black Helicopters

Re: ICL VME Diagnostician here, 1980's

I had an in depth trace file from a gov defence site, I assumed had been redacted and strings modified, computer names and ip's transmogrified etc by a program.

I came across a login name, but the format was a bit like strace and double spaced, and assumed they had used some humour on this as it came out as an amusing name referring to what could be taken for building for bowel movements. Let's say it is Bog.

In my reply, I said the user who was active when the problem occurred, was Bog, can you ask him what he was doing. Anyway resolved the issue and thought nothing more about it.

A few weeks later I get a visit to our office from that department by two guys, out of the blue, no warnings, a surprise, and their office a quite a few hours away in the capital city. The only time it happened in that place as it was in the sticks miles from anywhere, One guy introduced himself, it was Mr Brian Og. Only the real name in the file was much funnier.

Last week must be 10 years later an install failed, I asked for the log, nope. Probably not related.

A tale of two dishwashers: Buy one, buy it again, and again

Ken Shabby

Re: Bought a shed

You are Arthur Jackson and I claim my £5

CIA illegally harvested US citizens' data, senators assert

Ken Shabby

Re: Land of the Free spies on its own?

<Dolly Parton retires for the evening>

<Sleeps on her back>

'Boombox' function sparks Tesla recall

Ken Shabby
Holmes

Snot off a stick... now that's quick. What is the El Reg unit of acceleration?

Have you tried restarting? Reinstalling? Upgrading? Moving house and changing your identity?

Ken Shabby
Mushroom

Re: Ask other users in our forums...

Of course it was DNS, it's always DNS, even when you *know* it isn't.

Burning plasma signals step forward in race for nuclear fusion as researchers get bigger capsule for their 192-laser experiment

Ken Shabby

As a schoolboy in North Berks, as it was then, taken around Culham Laboratories 1969, they said 50 years then. I presume it still is.

Ken Shabby
Headmaster

Re: ... demonstrating self-heating plasma ...

My vague memories have that as sticky-backed plastic. But I'll always remember Lulu.

BOFH: What a beautiful classic car. Shame if anything were to happen to it

Ken Shabby
Holmes

Re: ID

Was one of them named Plum by any chance?

Dog forgets all about risk of drowning in a marsh as soon as drone dangles a sausage

Ken Shabby
Coat

Re: Using a sausage was an offally good idea. Well done.

Could have been wurst.

OK, boomer? Gen-X-ers, elder millennials most likely to name their cars, says DVLA

Ken Shabby

Re: B**ch!

You must be a loony.

Playing jigsaw on my roof: They can ID you from your hygiene habits

Ken Shabby

Re: Don’t joke

Moneypenny, why do I get all the shit jobs?

Cold War Spies Sifted Through Used Soviet Toilet Paper In Search of Clues

China's Yutu rover spots 'mysterious hut' on far side of the Moon

Ken Shabby

Problem solved: Arthur Jackson's other shed.

Can Rust save the planet? Why, and why not

Ken Shabby
Coat

Re: Cool!

Mine is the one with the RPG in the pocket.

Could we use an LLVM-based cross-compiler to build apps for quantum computers? This alliance says yes

Ken Shabby
Mushroom

Re: Premature whatever

If you write a bug, does the cat die?

How do you call support when the telephones go TITSUP*?

Ken Shabby
Big Brother

Re: Reclaiming Private Call Costs

I always wondered why my old man used to get the garage to wind his 'clock' forwards during a service.

What a bunch of bricks: Crooks knock hole in toyshop wall, flee with €35k Lego haul

Ken Shabby
Holmes

Re: piecing together!

The hole in the wall, Police are looking into it.

BOFH: What if International Bad Actors designed the vaccine to make us watch more Steven Seagal movies?

Ken Shabby

Re: circular history

Venezuelan Beaver?

You forced me to use this fancypants app and now you're asking for a printout?

Ken Shabby
Coffee/keyboard

Re: A modern-day Adventure.

You are at Witt's end. Passages lead off in *all* directions.

Assange psychiatrist misled judge over parentage of his kids, US tells High Court

Ken Shabby

Re: Man that guy

Seems he prefers the Cheese and Tuna flavoured ones.

BOFH: So you want to have your computer switched out for something faster? It's time to learn from the master

Ken Shabby
Linux

Re: not by a long shot!

I thought they did that to make the bird/mouse shit itself, making the disembowelment slightly less messy and the subsequent meal tastier.

How to keep a support contract: Make the user think they solved the problem

Ken Shabby
Devil

That Engineer, bloody useless, solved the problem myself I did, in front of 'im!

Computer scientists at University of Edinburgh contemplate courses without 'Alice' and 'Bob'

Ken Shabby
Holmes

Re: It's not just the names ...

Pretty sure it's Teco

Netflix sued by South Korean ISP after Squid Game fans swell traffic to '1.2Tbps'

Ken Shabby
Pirate

Release the Kraken...

A speech recognition app goes into a bar. Speak up if you’ve heard it already

Ken Shabby

Re: Palm glyphs

That would be "Hairoglyphs"

The Register just found 300-odd Itanium CPUs on eBay

Ken Shabby
Paris Hilton

Re: So thats what Wang were

Famous for the advertising slogans I used to see on Route 9? Been a while though, I could be dreaming.

"Wang Cares!" and "My Wang never goes down"

US boffins: We're close to fusion ignition in the lab – as seen in stars and thermonuclear weapons

Ken Shabby
Coat

Re: I guessing ...

You are al wrong... all it needs is genuine AI a quantum computer, oh and blockchain, everything needs blockchain.

Chocolate beer barred from sale after child mistakes it for chocolate milk

Ken Shabby
Flame

Well, it is Aus. Hot enough to boil a monkeys' bum

Trouts on a plane: Utah drops fish into lakes from aircraft and circa 95% survive

Ken Shabby
Angel

Re: Religous option?

Just add bread rolls

BOFH: When the Sun rises in the West and sets in the East, only then will the UPS cease to supply uninterrupted voltage

Ken Shabby

Re: Poor cyclist

Dick the shit?

What job title would YOU want carved on your gravestone? 'Beloved father, Slayer of Dragons, Register of Domains'

Ken Shabby
Holmes

Re: Romanes eunt domus

Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum videtur

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