Posts by Neil

Wi-Fi finds its way into park bench

If they made the seats

in the same way as the kinetic dance floors you get in clubs, you could kill 2 birds with one stone.

http://www.interactivearchitecture.org/eco-dance-floor.html

Especially with the increasing mass of the average westerner...

Microsoft slings out Office 2010 technical preview

@Henry

I'll give you that its more pretty, but I'll deny its more intuitive till my dying breath (especially Access 2007).

Odds on them listening to users

and getting rid of the stupid ribbons and stupid sidebars?

What on earth do you think you are doing, Darling?

The Adam Smith Institute?

I'll read this piece in consideration with all their other wonderful Thatcherite success stories - the poll tax, the deregulation of public transport, state schools running their own budgets and the internal market in the National Health Service, because they've all been so beneficial for the country.

And UKIP - the BNP for the chattering classes...

Microsoft's online Office variant preps for business

Hopefully

they'll have removed those god-awful "ribbons" and gone back to sensible menus.

Girls Aloud obscenity trial delayed

£3k a day?

How the heck does a civil servant earn enough to pay this much for an ambulance chaser? I want some of my tax back, please.

Google Street View hits UK streets

No joy in Soho

Looks like they covered it early on a (wet) Sunday morning, so no sign of any furtive businessmen emerging out of sex-shops or from doorways with "Model Upstairs" signs.

Italians boffins prove plausibility of spam-javelin spam

Why were they only measuring "average flaccid penis length"?

Surely the important measure is when its in...erm... the other state

Humvee with frikkin laser on it takes out killer robot

@AC

Nah, just tune it to the UV or IR ends of the spectrum, then it'll only show up on special goggles. Even better, use microwaves &, as well as zapping UAVs, you can boil enemy combatants in their own skin.

BT price rises go down well

@ Andy ORourke

Business suggests they are competing in a level market, BT are closer to a monopoly, with the vast majority of UK homes having no other option. I only use my landline for t'internet (with Be) and am unsure why I should subsidise this bloated, unwieldy monolith.

BNP membership list leaks online

@ Boris the Cockroach

Banning other political parties I don't like? That'd be all of them, then... Sounds like a plan to me.

500,000 oppose Red Arrows Olympic ban

Got to love the unwashed masses

It'd be funny if these knuckle-draggers didn't have the vote

Paris, cos she does love a man with a shiny helmet.

Virgin warns 800 punters for file-sharing

Data Protection Issues?

Are Virgin sharing client data with the BPI? If they are doing so without permission, is this not a breach of the Data Protection Act?

Biggles battles Yanks for right to sport tash

@ Peyton

You think the armed forces need a reason for ridiculously stringent regulations concerning the minutia of servicemen's lives?

Steel Cloud servers to power US Navy robo-cannon kit

Re: USMC ns Navy

the US Marines are a separate branch of the military to the Navy BUT are part of the Department of the Navy politically. So its the DoN who would asses the viability of new robo-jarheads.

Enraged vegan spitroasts Reg hack

A quick google

reveals she has a habit of sending ranting missives of the type favoured by rabid yogurt-knitters. It's like the Guardian equivalent of the Mail's "Why, oh why, oh why..." letter to the editor.

BTW animals don't have rights, they have a flavour.

Tesco in X-rated Lawnmower Simulator shocker

I think the line

"Dispatch them by spraying grass cuttings at them before they make divots with slide tackles or, if close enough, mow them down!" may explain the certificate.

Imagine the splatter from being sucked into a ride-on mower.

Lily Allen gets 'social networking' TV show

Are the Chuckle Brothers running the BBC?

They downgrade the important & interesting departments, then go & waste God-knows how much money on this dross.

Australia to get 1,000 megawatt wind farm

If they build them near Aussie sports stadiums

They'd be able to tap all the air movement generated by the whinging everytime a decision goes against them.

Ex-astronaut offers apologies, Huggies to 'love-rival'

One would guess so

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2007/03/08/nasa_nappy_sacks/

National Guardsman suspended over personal website

To be even fairer

given the "have you turned it off & on again" level of knowledge of your average support monkey, "the wholesale slaughter of every idiot on the face of the planet." would probably involve the culling of a whole lot of IT folk too...