* Posts by Graham Hawkins

74 publicly visible posts • joined 24 Aug 2007


Rolls-Royce, Airbus, Siemens tease electric flight engine project

Graham Hawkins

Is the next version...

...going to be called the 'E-Fan(n)Y'?

Software update turned my display and mouse upside-down, says user

Graham Hawkins

Re: Now it can be told...

In the days of DOS, a colleague was away for a day or two. I took his monitor (CRT of course) apart and swapped the scan coil connections, vertical and horizontal, and scattered his disk with files called MIRROR.BAT & RORRIM.COM and such. In the end he gave up and had to ask...

If you need to replace anything other than your iPhone 8's battery or display, good luck

Graham Hawkins

Re: It doesn't matter...

It's the cathode that loses emissivity.

In some valves, usually those aimed at battery powered equipment, the heater and cathode are an item.

Valves used in TVs usually had indirectly heated cathodes.

Obviously, if you can still piss without the aid of a bag, you're too young to remember this stuff...

Massive iPhone X leak trashes Apple's 10th anniversary circus

Graham Hawkins

Re: Is "iPhone X" the actual name?

Mine's a 6X thanks...

Argentina eyes up laser death cannon testbed warship

Graham Hawkins

Re: We could threaten to send Boris

Maybe there are still some left over mines he could clear...

Four techies flummoxed for hours by flickering 'E' on monitor

Graham Hawkins

CRTs were great. Used to put my GSM mobile under mine. The wobbly image told me the phone was ringing no matter how loud the rock was in my earphones. Bloody flat screens stopped that dodge.

Bye bye MP3: You sucked the life out of music. But vinyl is just as warped

Graham Hawkins

I seem to remember a Monty Python LP that did the same trick. It finished with an endless repeat of "Oops, I'm sorry, I've scratched your CLICK..."

Graham Hawkins

Re: MP3 Gone?

AU pull the other one.

Graham Hawkins

Re: Train?

That's the trouble. Should have used deja PPM....

More brilliant Internet of Things gadgetry: A £1,300 mousetrap

Graham Hawkins

Re: Get a cat.

Yep. Cats catch them alright.

Then bring them in through the cat flap, and bat them around the floor for a bit until they end up under the fridge.

No internet connection is necessary to find the rodent corpse. After a week or two, you can just follow your nose. Or the trail of maggots.

Cats are the perfect solution...

FAKE BREWS: America rocked by 'craft beer' scandal allegations

Graham Hawkins

Re: "India Pale Ale went *to* India"

Or the Bristol Stool Chart....

Trump's cartoon comedy approach to running a country: 'One in, two out' rule for regulations

Graham Hawkins

What else do you expect from a glorified hotel manager?

More 'Fawlty Towers' than 'Night Manager' then?

Trump's FBI boss, Attorney General picks reckon your encryption's getting backdoored

Graham Hawkins

Hey!! Less of the bashing 60-70 year old guys! (Guess who's just had a significant birthday...)

The problem is not their age, it is that they are wilfully thick, stupid politicians(*) pandering to the lowest electoral denominator.

(*) Other types of politician are available, but are becoming difficult to find in this post-truth, post-science, post-expert age.

Boffins eschew silicon to build tiniest-ever transistor, just 1nm long

Graham Hawkins

Re: Shirley

Just don't put it in an engine/gearbox with a wet clutch...

Smartphone lost on QANTAS 'began hissing, emitting smoke and making orange glow'

Graham Hawkins

Re: How powerful are those seats?

Powerful enough to move from reclined to upright with a properly fat 1st class passenger spread out on them....

Great British Great Bake Off gets new judge

Graham Hawkins

>The British public have gradually acknowledged that double entendres are an integral part of the culture. They were once the preserve of a trip to the seaside or the music hall.

Never listened to "I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue" then? Purveyor of juicy double-entendre to the middle classes since the early 70's.

BBC detector vans are back to spy on your home Wi-Fi – if you can believe it

Graham Hawkins

Re: Once upon a time detector vans existed

Doesn't have to be traffic analysis of the downlink. What if the iPlayer client generated uplink packets of known length and timing? It could make a relatively easily detected signal. The client could modulate the length & timing of the UL packets to pass info of limited bandwidth.

What's all this? Welcome to The Register's News Bytes

Graham Hawkins

Re: Can I switch them off as they mess up the front page layout....?

Ah! That's much better. Thanks for pointing pointing to the link. Hadn't spotted it before.

Hands on with the BBC's Micro:Bit computer. You know, for kids

Graham Hawkins

Damn! I thought they were just for Christmas.

"If you have a Year Seven kid, it will be yours to keep..."

Triple-murderer prisoner keeps mobile phone in his butt for a week

Graham Hawkins

Re: Love the honesty

You could only charge it once it's been discharged...

Graham Hawkins

Ring ring....

That's all.

Rupert Murdoch wants Google and chums to be g-men's backdoor men

Graham Hawkins

Surprised he even remembers his Twitter password.

As I recall, he couldn't remember a bloody thing at Leveson...

Terrorists seek to commit deadly 'cyber attacks' in UK, says Chancellor Osborne

Graham Hawkins

Re: Die Hard 4.0

Don't hold your breath. Theresa hasn't worked out '1984' is a dystopian novel and not a blueprint for government yet...

LG uses sucky logic to force Dyson admission its vacuums suck badly

Graham Hawkins

It's not for nothing that that Lucas was known as the Prince of Darkness...

Sixty-five THOUSAND Range Rovers recalled over DOOR software glitch

Graham Hawkins

Hopefully it will take a while to fix...

...Fewer of the ostentatious hulks blocking the roads can only be a good thing.

UK.gov loses crucial battle in home-taping war with musicians

Graham Hawkins

Re: Hang on a mo

Just when you think the music industry might have dragged itself out of the primeval swamp onto the digital shores of the third quarter of the 20th century...

Your new car will dob you in to the cops if you crash, decrees EU

Graham Hawkins
Big Brother

eCall – Do you have any concerns for your privacy? You shouldn't ...

Here you are. Read on. And be prepared to be patronised...


So now you can see that there's nothing to be worried about.

No, really, there isn't.

Nothing at all....

NSA: 'Back doors are a bad idea, give us a FRONT door key'

Graham Hawkins

Re: Github

Upvote for Spike Milligan reference...

Rand Paul puts Hillary Clinton's hard drive on sale

Graham Hawkins

I'DE never stoop that low for a pun...

BACK OFF, spooks: UK legal hacking code should be 'resisted at all costs' says lawyer

Graham Hawkins

Did you mean:

I see uk.gov's updating the law to match current _mal_practice... again...

Buggy? Angry? LET IT ALL OUT says Linus Torvalds

Graham Hawkins

Re: No need to be a dick.

> Not while the public face of linux and the internet voices of it's devotees remain so pompous, arrogant and just downright unpleasant...

Not, of course, a charge that can be levelled at the upper echelons of any closed-source OS companies, or their devotees.

MOULDY DICK: France aims to snatch EXPLODING WHALE crown from U.S.

Graham Hawkins

I shouldn't have watched the video while eating my sandwiches....

OpenSUSE tidies up disto model ahead of 13.4

Graham Hawkins



I thought that was succinct. But apparently I have to add some letters to make it a valid post. So here are some: QWERTYUIOP

Mars needs women, claims NASA pseudo 'naut: They eat less

Graham Hawkins

Also, it's a well proven fact the women are better at fighting Alien(s)

Windows 10 feedback: 'Microsoft, please do a deal with Google to use its browser'

Graham Hawkins

Re: "As slow as a fart in a frying pan"?

A supercooled pan cannot be legitmately described as a 'frying' pan.

DNS cockup locks Virgin Media customers out of ntlworld.com email

Graham Hawkins

It's back...

...at least webmail is.

Graham Hawkins

Noticed it at 6am this morning. Tried the helpline when I got to work - gave up after 20 mins of canned music. Webmail still broken 7 hours later....

No more turning over a USB thing, then turning it over again to plug it in: Reversible socket ready for lift off

Graham Hawkins

Re: You know you want it

Soon there'll be an XKCD 1406 just for USB...

Brit chap weaves silver bullet for wireless health scare bollocks

Graham Hawkins

And you filed this under your 'SCIENCE' section because....?

John McAfee declares war on Android

Graham Hawkins

Re: Really

Next time, I must remember to put <sarcasm></sarcasm> tags round my post.

Terribly sorry to have wasted your time explaining about OpenJDK...

Graham Hawkins


Graham Hawkins

Will it be pushed on to your device with Java updates...?

UK's tech capital named: Read it and weep, Tech City startup hipsters

Graham Hawkins

Re: Molly Millars Lane

Was your software firm where they've built the new Lidl?

They WANT to EAT YOUR COMPUTER - welcome your ANT overlords

Graham Hawkins

Re: maybe

If the link was proved, we could make them all little tin-foil hats....

Is this the first ever web page? If not, CERN would like to know

Graham Hawkins

Irritation isn't what it used to be...

Mosaic turns 20: Let's fire up the old girl, show her the web today

Graham Hawkins

Re: Mosaic changed my life

Oops - costellokids.com seems to be down.

Too many curious Reg readers!


Graham Hawkins

Re: new shapes for computers and ways of interaction

@ Ioan

I don't know many normal people who talk to their computer. Curse it under their breath, shout at it, or possibly hit it, yes. But never talk to it...

BBC in secret trial to see if you care about thing you plainly don't

Graham Hawkins
Thumb Down

Re: Power Hungry

> Where precisely?

I'm pleased for your parents, that they can receive DAB well, living out in the sticks as they do.

I live in a heavily populated area round Wokingham & Bracknell. Sadly, the DAB reception here is utterly crap for the multiplex carrying the national BBC stations. The nearest transmitter of said multiplex is at Hemdean, about 20 miles away. We have one DAB radio in the house. It almost works properly if placed in an upstairs room next to the window. Needless to say I have no intention of buying any more, and I will be highly annoyed with any politician who renders useless the various VHF FM radios we posses by turning off the signal.

Ubuntu 12.10: More to Um Bongo Linux than Amazon ads

Graham Hawkins

The Amazon link make the lens useless.

I booted the beta CD. Wanted to see whether cclive (an on-line video ripper available in 12.04) is available in 12.10. So I type 'cclive' in the lens, and immediately get a load ads for stuff from Amazon, largely pertaining to the band '10cc'. Nothing at all about 'cclive' the application....

GCHQ to encrypt your tweets with Enigma - for science

Graham Hawkins

Only after WWII did the phrase WWI become commonplace...

...and even then, without the use of the definite article.