* Posts by BitCoward

26 publicly visible posts • joined 11 Dec 2017

Grab a towel and pour yourself a Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster because The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is 42


I was 8, I remember the BBC hyping it up for ages beforehand. Loved every minute of it, including the wierder Lintilla episodes.

Breaker one-nine, this trucker's rubber ducked, facing a year in the slammer for Acer laptop thefts


Re: Type 2 Diabetes?

"Like a clown's pocket"

Tech can endure the most inhospitable environments: Space, underwater, down t'pit... even hairdressers


Bill for new keyboard...

or at least solvent to remove satsuma juice, flesh and pith.

Yahoo! hack! payout! nearly! approved! and! the! question! is! how! to! spend! 60! cents!?


US! or Israel! Only!

Nuff! Said!

Squirrel away a little IT budget for likely Brexit uncertainty, CIOs warned


Corporate responsibility

You who voted for these f@ckers can own this



Y2K quick-fix crick? 1920s come roaring back after mystery blip at UK's vehicle licensing agency


Post-Weimar administration parallels ahoy!


Re: 2038? That'll be the least of our worries

Our Will would call that "a consumation Devoutly to be wished"


2038? That'll be the least of our worries

Doctor Who spoiler alert:

We'll be Orphan 55 ourselves after the Musk rocket gets the 1% off to Planet B.

Overstock dot-gone: Surplus biz CEO now surplus to requirements, ejects after Russian spy fling, deep state rant


You may want to edit this piece a bit

He appears to be responsible for a large number of entirely redacted pages in the Mueller report. He approached the Feds, when first contacted, they ignored him, but when the Trump-Russia investigation was started, then they called him back in and asked him to maintain his relationship with now-convicted Russian agent, Butina.

He also appears to have evidence of Don Jr holding meeting with Russians about election dirt at an NRA meeting that contradicts the Trumpster's sworn evidence to Congress.

So not entirely a crackpot then.

It's so hot, UK needs to start naming heatwaves like we do when it's a bit windy – climate boffins


Re: Names

it's too hot to explain jokes


Re: Names

"No disrespect to people called Saoirse, but I bet you often have to correct people."

It's pronounced Shu-vawn

Deepfake 3.0 (beta), the bad news: This AI can turn ONE photo of you into a talking head. Good news: There is none


Well that's fuckin' cheery

Life in the 21st C just keeps getting better doesn't it...

Users fail to squeak through basic computer skills test. Well, it was the '90s


Squeaking through a more formal sort of PC testing

An old employer insisted all staff took the ECDL: European Community Driving Licence for IT. I strolled through the email, wordpro and spreadsheet sides, but I was a bit rusty on the database section, even though I used Access regularly. The test used a "live environment" where a question would come up and clicking on the wrong menu item would fail that question. After realising my normal " let's try this" method would result in a fail I resorted to lateral thinking and opened a second window with standard Access. After that, all was plain sailing but my respect for a testing system that could be so easily gamed meant I had no respect for the qualification. Swings and roundabouts...

The Palm Palm: The Derringer of smartphones


Not a shadow phone unless you manage to clone your SIM

Last time I looked this was a bit illegal.

Euro consumer groups: We think Android tracking is illegal


Re: (sees mention of Google maps in headline ...)

Waze is the answer

'My entire company is without comms': Gamma's Horizon cloud PBX goes DOWN


No sign of the promised event horizon here at 14:24 GMT

Atomic keyring's eerie blue glow lights SPB lab


Still going strong 16 years later. Ours illuminates the light pull in the garage so we can find it in the dark, however for years, it was a comforting nightlight to our little ones, we nicknamed it Gary Gaslight.

UKIP doubled price of condoms for sale at party conference


Re: Eh?

For arseholes, though technically not required as a contraceptive.

Alibaba crafts AI chips, Facebook uses Bayesian magic to tweak code performance, and more


Re: Smoke and mirrors? It's an MNP

Minimum Non-viable Product

Fail whale ahoy!

UKIP flogs latex love gloves: Because Brexit means Brexit


Appropriate seeing as our future prospects have been shafted

fuck fuck fuckety fucking Brexit.

SuperProf gets schooled after assigning weak passwords to tutors


So they compensate for their foulup by misleading users

"All tutors from the tutor pages will <snip> have their accounts updated 'star' tutor status, that usually requires many months of activity to achieve on the platform."

So who are the real star tutors on the platform?

Solving one problem by creating another, impressive.

What a flap: SIM swiped from slain stork's GPS tracker used to rack up $2,700 phone bill


Re: So for 20 hours . . .

Some of us younglings have mp3s of those shows.

This HTC U12+ review page is left intentionally blank


Is concussion not a thing anymore?

Better subjects to pick on than Karius for this? If you want inexplicable unforced errors, how about Google's attempts at Social Media or HMG IT projects? Plenty of those to chose from.

Church of England will commune with God for you via Amazon's Echo


Re: 42


HMRC opens consultation to crack down on off-payroll working in private sector


Is that all?

So, about a quarter of a Vodafone - perhaps all the IR35 contractors could arrange to have gone to the same school as the Head of HMRC...

Crown Prosecution Service is coming for crooks' cryptocurrency


Follow the money

Doesn't confiscating BitC also allow plod to make like Linda Lovelace and follow the money? The whole, we know where you've been aspect of blockchain could provide some useful evidence.

Let's hope Bannon paid the Russian's FB bills in BitC.