Posts by sambaynham

What if Chrome broke features of the web and Google forgot to tell anyone? Oh wait, that's exactly what happened

The problem isn't just Google.

One of the frustrating things about working in PHP is JS developers boasting about how much 'faster' their language is, then watching them create a side that takes ten seconds to load a simple page because of all the react-y bollocks they've added.

For a glorious, gold moment after the downfall of I.E, standards-compliant and progressively enhanced was the name of the web game. The web just worked. Now with all the shite we're adding to the frontend it's barely functional. Add frontend spaghetti to browser lock-in and somehow we're back in the f*cking nineties.

These centrifugal moon towers could be key to life off-planet

Re: And the first meteor strike

Forget meteors, what happens when the Principality of Zeon or somesuch invades? You're going to need at least three Gundams to defend that thing, and several hot-headed/isolated/genetically-engineered youths to pilot them. That just adds the the expense.

This is a great idea on paper, but no-one's considering the practicalities.

How a botched kernel patch broke Ubuntu – and why it may happen again

Panic! at the distro? Have your pint your magnificent bastard.

Makers of ad blockers and browser privacy extensions fear the end is near

More proof, if proof were needed, that Chrome is spyware with a browser attached.

This Free software ain't free to make, pal, it's expensive: Mozilla to bankroll Firefox with paid-for premium extras

I'm with the Mozillians on this one.

I love Firefox Quantum. Chrome became a memory hogging, data-slurping beast just as Firefox became lean and fast again. If they want money for, say, a replacement to LastPass that actually bloody works, and a private VPN that requires no faff, I'd be happy to pay it, so long as it's reasonable.

Services cost money. As someone who now has a little money, I'm happy to support my favourite software in return for non-core features. If it keeps the web that little bit less tied-down to the Apple-Amazon-Microsoft-Google-Facebook Hegemony, that's a win.

Dratted hipster UX designers stole my corporate app

In defence of the guacamole-eaters...

I'm a developer with 20 years' of experience, and this just isn't true. I can use Photoshop/Illustrator/Gimp with the best of 'em, but I'd never call myself a designer.

I thought I was, when I was young and foolish. Now I've worked with professional designers I realise that all I can do, from a frontend point of view, is stack the blocks.

Good design is a real skill that takes years to attain. Sure there are some useless crayon-wielders out there, but a good designer would have asked your question before anyone else did. And they'd have kept asking it in different ways until they got a working design.

Or perhaps I've just been lucky in my colleagues.

Clone your own Prince Phil, says eBay seller hawking debris left over from royal car crash

Re: Apologies

'It's unlikely that he was popping down to Co-Op unaccompanied to get their tea for the evening or taking himself back to Buck Pal.'

Prince Phillip's a pot-noodle man. HRH is partial to a pepperami.

Smartphones gateway drug to the Antichrist, says leader of Russian Orthodox Church

Take your upvote, you magnificent b*stard.

I'm changing my wake word...

...to Iä! Iä! Alexa fhtagn!

Pork pulled: Plug jerked out of beacon of bacon delight

Re: Mixed feelings

'Whilst I salute the achievement of bacon-on-demand, I find the term Department of Meat Sciences ... disturbing.'

Relax, it's just the name of the combined biology, sociology and anthropology departments.

Postmates plans rollout of autonomous delivery robots in US

Re: Interesting....

Thank you for ordering with Amazon! Please take your package! YOU HAVE TEN SECONDS TO COMPLY.

A Christmas classic: Cloudera founder asks staff to stay another day

It depends on the company whether it's worth it or not.

I decided to leave a workplace. I was contracted with a one-month notice period, and they couldn't find/train anyone in that time, so I stayed for three months and recruited my replacement. The reference I got out of that is directly responsible for getting me more than one job. If the company's going to do right by you, it's sometimes worth putting in the extra grind. (Also, I didn't want my baby to be thrown over by the SEO snakeoil company whose involvement in the project triggered my decision to leave.)

Naked women cleaning biz smashes patriarchy by introducing naked bloke gardening service

Re: Careful with that hedge trimmer...

In Australia, Wasps are the least of your problems. Bitten in your gentleman's area by one of their spiders would be a nasty way to go.

Japanese cyber security minister 'doesn't know what a USB stick is'

Re: That's nothing

Ha! I'm pinching that, Alister!

Raspberry Pi supremo Eben Upton talks to The Reg about Pi PoE woes

It;'s a bummer, but...

...isn't it refreshing to see an admission of a technical defect that's that honest and transparent?

No need to code your webpage yourself, says Microsoft – draw it and our AI will do the rest

Re: Hilarious

Let's hope! I'm a Web Developer, and I've built my career on repairing the mistakes of fools. AI fools or meat fools, makes no difference to me.

US websites block netizens in Europe: Why are they ghosting EU? It's not you, it's GDPR

It's alright. Needs more <marquee> tags. And maybe a horrible tiling animated gif.

I like to imagine all the tech recruiters currently being ignored to death in my inbox going "I'm melting, I'm meeeeeeeelting!"

Bwah ha ha.

Kernel-memory-leaking Intel processor design flaw forces Linux, Windows redesign

Re: Intel Inside...

Me too! Ryzen Ryzen, La la la!

Brace yourselves, fanboys. Winter is coming. And the iPhone X can't handle the cold

Re: But..

Incorrect. If it doesn't work, it's because you're not believing hard enough.

Look out, Pepe: Martha Lane Fox has a plan

I propose a new technology!

CAPTGOA - Completely Automated Public Turing test to tell Goodthinkers and Oldthinkers Apart.

Let's make the coppers wear cameras! That'll make the ba... Oh. No sodding difference

Re: nonsense

...you are Amber Rudd, and I claim my £5

SpaceX releases Pythonesque video of rocket failures

I'm going to use some of these:

"It's not a bug on the live site, it's an unscheduled programmer performance evaluation."

Everyone loves programming in Python! You disagree? But it's the fastest growing, says Stack Overflow

Re: My thoughts on this ...

I hope my own personal efforts have contributed to this in some small way. Why? Well, because whenever I'm asked 'My lad/lass is interested in programmng, what language should they learn first?', I always answer : 'Python. It'll teach them good indenting habits.'

So far as I'm concerned, being a good n00b language is nothing to be ashamed of. I cut my teeth on PHP, but I wish it'd been Python.

Farewell Unity, you challenged desktop Linux. Oh well, here's Ubuntu 17.04

Re: My thoughts on this ...

I'm going in the opposite direction. I started out as a Windows-only teenager. Then moved to linux, and loved the simple UI of the Ubuntus (Unity was a jump, but I learned at least to tolerate it).

But the older I get, the more I like the CLI. I think it's because I have more demands on my time. So when I want to do something on my computer, I want to do PRECISELY that thing, right-the-heck-now. I don't want to be suggested at or wizarded.

I'm 32 and I don't have a house, still less a lawn, but if I did I'd be telling you damn kids to get off it. Fortunately, I live in the North, so there are always clouds to shout at.