* Posts by Chairman of the Bored

954 publicly visible posts • joined 19 Apr 2017

‘I broke The Pentagon’s secure messaging system – and won an award for it!’

Chairman of the Bored

Re: Work ethic

Working long hours as a US/UK cultural issue... Can't speak for UK but I'd say my sample size of 1 out of 320M says it's a big problem in the US, but not for reasons one would think.

I'm looking at my schedule for the day... I'm frittering away four hours on mandatory sexual harassment training... mandatory records management training... an "all hands" to discuss our piss poor morale... a meeting with one of my subordinates to discuss HIS piss poor morale. That's half my day gone. Tomorrow we hear from legal about compliance issues that are only tangentially concerned with anything we do, another two hours. Then we have to craft an ever-fscking "vision" statement in yet another demented "all-hands" group grope. Still have to get the work done? Overtime. Big-time. I blame the lawyers!

IBM Australia to end on-shore software support

Chairman of the Bored

I think IBM figured out...

What a man running from a tiger does: one doesn't have to outrun through tiger, you just have to be faster than the other guy.

Instead of shooting for legendary quality, it looks like IBM has realized all it needs to do is suck slightly less than DXC and HPE.

Programmers! Close the StackOverflow tabs. This AI robot will write your source code for you

Chairman of the Bored

Re: I think I can summarize what's pissing off the other commentards

@Deive, looks like I need to tighten up my terminology! By AI guy what I mean is the class of academic researchers who have very little experience with the hard realities of real life operations. Sometimes people push elegant solutions to non-problems, and do so in such a way that if you blindly implement the proposed solutions, you're screwed.

Chairman of the Bored

Re: I think I can summarize what's pissing off the other commentards

@Doctor Evil, thanks for that. I did not realize National Geographic did articles on the cargo cults... I will go back and have a read. Back then I was an obnoxious kid and my interest in Natl Geo was probably more prurient than strictly necessary and therefore centered on their excellent photography...

Chairman of the Bored

I think I can summarize what's pissing off the other commentards

For AI guys who don't understand the pushback... I'm going to take a risk and put words in other people's mouths.

Nothing will piss off a senior developer faster than a team member who doesn't know what the hell he is doing and cargo cults some random code off the internet, pulls the pin, and rolls it in. If you don't know what Prof Feynman means by cargo cults, look it up and then look at what you're doing. In my organization doing cargo cult development will cause us to send you out the door.

All this AI does is automate cargo cult development.

It's been said that amateurs discuss tactics, generals discuss logistics. Well, in this world I could say amateurs discuss coding. Senior leaders discuss specifications and proofs. Battles are won with coding. The war is won through writing specifications, documentation, test cases. All the crap we hate to do ... is actually critical. The stuff we like to do (coding) is necessary but insufficient.

Any competent CS can code, and code in whatever language they need to get the job done. Thats a minimum condition of employment. How does this autocult 2000 stuff help with documenting it's own assumptions? How do I effectively prove this crap meets a formally reviewed spec?

If the AI can help me craft better specifications, craft test cases with optimal coverage and effectiveness for a given level of effort, help me have documentation that at least resembles the effen product... THEN I will be impressed.

Chairman of the Bored

Re: Go with the Flow

@data source,

Agree with you about needing decent flow editors and visualization, but I think it's lacking more than that.

20 years ago I did a lot of signal processing development in the Simulink framework built on Matlab. Think of it as flow oriented visual programming for signal processing... Complete with automagic code generation for the then state of the art TMS series digital signal processors. The code generation was ... Adequate. The overall construct was good enough for academic exploration of algorithms and "toy" systems. But for anything of real world complexity we had to go right back to C.

Fast forward to today and we have the gnuradio software defined radio framework. It's got an amazing bunch of blocks that abstract processing, io, hardware... Your little lines connect data flows, beautifully colored by data type. But for industrial strength work, one still falls back on it's excellent C++ or python APIs.

Why?

I think it's because the visual tools do not fit as well into ones configuration management framework. How do I quickly diff two graphical flows? How do I patch a graphical flow? A competent developer can very quickly get the gist of a code patch on inspection, but it feels like the cognitive load of parsing two visualizations and looking for subtleties is difficult... Hopefully technology will advance enough to eliminate these issues.

And, yes, I will have trouble trusting code generated by an AI who's internal algorithms cannot be understood or properly documented.

Chairman of the Bored

Not sure I would have chosen a readline as an example

Given how tough it is to properly armor I/O against buffer overruns and whatnot, I tend to require that the calls be simple, readable, auditable, and written by someone competent...

Did you guess 2019 for Intel's 10nm chip ramp up? Congratulations

Chairman of the Bored
Pint

Not bad for a firm was "stuck" fabbing DRAM

In the dark ages before the microprocessor, Intel was an also-ran making dynamic ram chips. Federico Faggin's epic 4004 and later 8008 micros changed the world and transformed Intel. You cannot say that about many people, but he did.

Sad note: F.F. (and you can see the F.F. on chip die) left Intel to launch the Zilog Z80 and Intel for years downplayed his role in creating the modern micro.

Apple debugs debugger, nukes pesky vulns in iOS, WebKit, macOS

Chairman of the Bored

Re: Why not scan properly?

@2+2=5 cunning plan? Or is the plan to use cunnilingus to distract the windows fans? Think I saw that movie. Damn, I'm distracted already. Sorry!

Audiophiles have really taken to the warm digital tone of streaming music

Chairman of the Bored

I miss stadium rock

Lord knows how many decibels... But when the whole stadium is moving, it's loud... Remember going to the Monsters of Rock concert. Just .... Wow.

Steaming is nice but you don't get a contact buzz that lasts for hours...

IETF: GDPR compliance means caring about what's in your logfiles

Chairman of the Bored

Re: How long are you required to keep financial records?

Thanks to all for clearing up my understanding; seems like a reasonable approach.

I think this can make for some very interesting log file rules though ... I can understand needing to wean my marketing weenies off the port 80/443 slurp, and really appreciate the value of doing so. But anything that's hitting ports I think are interesting (SSH, internal DHCP server).... It's going to take a lot to keep my hoarding instincts at bay.

Chairman of the Bored

What I'd really hope for is consistency

Govt expects my firm to cough up any piece of trivia created from the big bang to present... In a format of their choosing... More or less immediately.

But $DEITY help you get data back from any of the government services or their most favored contractors in any time frame whatsoever. FOIA? It's like playing the lottery, but it takes you years to lose rather than days.

This 3 day thing feels like a trap - who wants to be the first poor sod hit with a subpoena for full log details - down to full IPs - concerning an attack two months past - while compliant with the draft standard? Good luck, and start drinking immediately!

Chairman of the Bored

How long are you required to keep financial records?

Just curious. In the US the IRS can stick a probe in you for seven years, standard. Longer if they are pissed off. You better have receipts to back up every jot and tittle on your tax forms, and I suppose these would be covered if we had a GDPR-like law. Not only do I have proper names in them, but for some these are combined with websites, snail locations, etc. How does a European keep their personal or corporate financials on the right side of the law now?

For the record, when I dump a log, I want some privacy. Whether I get it... Who knows.

UK's Department of Fun seeks data strategy head – experience not needed

Chairman of the Bored

Call me cynical, but...

...if the UK govt is anything like the US govt, this sort of ad is written to match precisely one person: whomever their new line managers wish to award with the position. On closer inspection one typically realizes this is a sinecure or administrative assistant position, highly customized.

I've usually seen this used for the boss' kid, or the admin who could suck the chrome off a trailer hitch, whatever. The boss' kid usually gets a 'strategic planning' role; the mistress gets a 'financial analyst' position.

The relatively low salary is probably a step up for the lucky incumbent, but has to be below certain thresholds that would trigger additional external scrutiny (aka adult supervision). Sound about right?

Musk: I want to retrieve rockets with big Falcon party balloons

Chairman of the Bored

Re: "100 per cent oxygen at 16 psi " would kill you fairly fast.

@AC, thanks for that detailed post and great link. This really does boggle the mind. As a hardware engineer I tend to think I'm really hot stuff, but looking at what was accomplished in the early space program reminds me that (1) my ignorance is vastly larger than my knowledge, and (2) we truly do stand on the shoulders of giants. Thanks!

Chairman of the Bored

Re: "100 per cent oxygen at 16 psi " would kill you fairly fast.

@SC- quite correct. On orbit, one maintains O2 at a cabin pressure equal to the partial pressure of O2 at sea level, about 5.1psi. I guess - but don't know - that having to design for a lower static pressure makes the spacecraft lighter? Wonder what they had to do with Apollo spacecraft to move to a mixed gas system after the Apollo 1 disaster (what an awful way to die)

Found an interesting systems description link:

http://www.astronautix.com/g/geminitechnaldescription.html

Looks like internal pressure at launch was about atmospheric and the astonauts would be provided pure O2. Doesn't say whether the cabin was purged to eliminate the N2 but it's probably a reasonable assumption that it was. As the rocket lifts off the cabin is allowed to depressurize to 5.1psi or so, which happens around 20-40sec after launch. Atmosphere inside is definitely pure O2 at that point. On reenty the astronauts have to repressurize with external air during descent.

So the 'nauts are probably breathing pure O2 at full atmospheric pressure, at least while waiting for launch. Imagine that with countdown holds that might be quite a while. Wonder how close the men got to physiological limits...

Tech bribes: What's the WORST one you've ever been offered?

Chairman of the Bored

Not a bribe but one hell of a nice touch

CPI / Eimac Division television broadcast tubes... Your vacuum electron device fits into a wheeled chassis that contains the external RF cavities, cooling circuits, and whatnot. Big sucker, but puts out 10s of kW of clean RF power, with extraordinary reliability.

On the chassis is a little red toolbox, made of high quality steel, with the old Eimac logo emblazoned in gold upon it's lid. Inside are spare o-rings, EMI gaskets, hand tools, and all the little bits and baubles needed for tube alignment and cal. In a world of low quality crap and abusing users, it's a little bit of sanity.

Interestingly, as cool of a collector's item one would find the boxes - and RF engineers are inveterate tinkerers and frequently collect bits of interesting kit - I've never even heard of one getting nicked.

BOFH: We know where the bodies are buried

Chairman of the Bored

Re: A thouhgt - a very curious and potentially disturbing one

@Marshmallowtown, that's a disturbing thought! Or maybe not - than janitor in my building is probably tolhe most polite and hard-working bloke in the whole place. Interesting.

On a similar vein - lived near a gentlemen who used to a flag officer is the USN. Had a tour as shipbuilding superintendent. Real rough looking guy, and for some reason wanted accurate information about how things were going on the ways rather than rely on the BS feed provided by his staff... So his habit was to ditch his staff, pull on some filthy overalls, and walk around the docks and see for himself, at least until his staff found out and warned the contractors, sailors, mafia, etc what the old man was doing.

Asked him how he found out. Answer was something like, "well, the docks were nearly empty and everything looked pristine. Found a sailor polishing a railing for no good reason and asked him why. He answered, 'some g....m mother...er From NAVSEA is walking around to see what's wrong so I gotta polish this f....g railing. What a d...khead!...'

Asked what he did to the sailor. Response was something like 'why would I do anything??? I wanted honest feedback and I got it. he was the only man in sight doing his f....g job, so why should I be unhappy?'

Chairman of the Bored

Epic BOFH

Simultaneously get rid of the bidder and also put your employer on notice that your BS is sufficiently toxic that it can awaken lawyers from the dead ... so its best to keep you happy and compensated. A good strategy, I think.

Real world: mum worked admin within the president's office of a mid-sized university. President's admin treated everyone like absolute crap - particularly the IT people, whom she found beneath contempt. "Technicians!!". Turns out the loud banging sounds emanating from the president's office were in fact ... banging sounds. And somehow, miraculously, all the zesty email exchanges between the pres and admin got CC'ed to the entire staff and Board of Directors. After the necessary personnel changes were made, mum says the IT manager walked around for days smiling enigmatically.

Amazon, LG Electronics turned my vape into an exploding bomb, says burned bloke in lawsuit

Chairman of the Bored

So... Do we change this guy's name to Hot Rod?

Too soon!

British Crackas With Attitude chief gets two years in the cooler for CIA spymaster hack

Chairman of the Bored

Re: Another Perspective....

Totally agree. Right up the point where you start harassing the wife I might buy an argument that you're a politically motivated activist using illegal means to further your cause. Illegal, but I can respect other viewpoints. Intimidating a person's spouse though? That's out of bounds. Where I come from you get your ascii kicked at a bare minimum.

Time to ditch the front door key? Nest's new wireless smart lock is surprisingly convenient

Chairman of the Bored

Wonder how well it stands up to cold chisels

Had a safe problem once with a very similar looking lock. Locking mechanism itself had failed so the electronics and mech backup were not a good attack surface.

Locksmith returns with a hardened steel rod, 1/2in dia, a 2in wide cold chisel, a 16lb sledge hammer and very large assistant. Shot one was with the cold chisel very nearly tangent to the front surface of the safe... Lock goes flying across the room. Second and third blows with rod to guts of lock mechanism proper modified it to the point where hand tools did the job of moving the mechanism. 5 minutes versus a $400-$500 lock.

Mines the one with the nice deadbolt, right next to a floor to ceiling set of stained glass sidelights. Both at the insistence of the wife...

Pyro-brainiacs set new record with waste-heat-into-electricity study

Chairman of the Bored

Re: Potential Use in Photovoltaic Cells or Other ???

@AC- totally sensible approach! I especially like the pool idea.

On a little larger scale I know that at least in the City of Baltimore in the late 70s and early 80s, waste heat from a massive waste incinerator was used for district heating. I thought it was really neat at the time ... Use waste from a waste stream for something useful.

Chairman of the Bored

Re: Potential Use in Photovoltaic Cells or Other ???

Thanks YM! I think I will have another look at the economics. Built this house in the late 90's and much has probably changed. Now if I could just get the wife to let me clear the treeline...

Vr

CB

Chairman of the Bored

Re: Potential Use in Photovoltaic Cells or Other ???

Quite right! Our fracking craze in the US has provided quite a glut of natural gas; if you're on the distribution net the prices can be compelling. One has to ask whether the toxic contamination of groundwater is worth it, not to mention our ever increasing carbon footprint.

Personally I think it's nuts for another reason, too - fast forward to a time of greater petroleum scarcity: LNG makes a fairly decent vehicle fuel. Why burn it all up in stationary applications?

Chairman of the Bored

Re: Waste heat below 100oC...?

No clue what it's going to cost, but I'm trying to get my head wrapped around establishing a steady state Delta t of 50DegC across single digit micrometer thicknesses of any real material. Given any finite thermal conductivity that's a neat trick. Guess you will need a vast number of layers in reality; probably not a big deal. Possibly more difficult is the need is the directional reversal of the hot/cold sinks needed for the ferro material. If I've got alternating temps, why not use a Sterling engine ... I saw a presentation years ago on mems-fabbed Stirling. Wildly immature tech, but maybe some day.

Chairman of the Bored

Re: Potential Use in Photovoltaic Cells or Other ???

For home HVAC I'm using geothermal, in a closed loop heat exchanger system. Demonstrated COP is about 3.5 to 4.0. I live close to latitude 40N, in a heavily forested area with significant cloud cover so PV or solar heat concentration is not economical.

The economics of the proposition are neutral; the high cost of this installation will only just be offset by energy cost savings over the 15yr life expectancy of the system. That said I'm insulated from radical shifts in heating fuel prices...

Chairman of the Bored

Re: Potential Use in Photovoltaic Cells or Other ???

Not sure why you got the downvote there, your questions seem legit to me.

Since this tech is still pre-publication, and the press release raises more questions than answer, I'd say there will be nothing to apply to the back of your PV for a long time. For PV usually a quick win on the materials side is to apply a decent antirelfective coating, might get you another percent effcy, for a price (*). Another thing to look at is new nanomaterial coatings that are less susceptible to loading up with dust and crud than glass or polycarbonate. Again, maybe a percent.

What type of bore hole? If we are talking oil exploration you've got a lot of vibrational energy you can harvest. Temps are very high but downhole it's tough to get a delta T big enough to be interesting.

* As with anything there is a cost/benefit trade-off you've got to work. To include procurement, maintenance, disposal costs...

Chairman of the Bored

Re: Waste heat below 100oC...?

Quite right, has to be a delta T, presumably across the film.

Also: at a few hundreds of nm thick, unless there is a decent heat sink on one side the film will reach a steady state temp somewhere btw the driving side and ambient - probably a lot closer to the source temp, so your delta T will be less than surface temperature to ambient.

There appears to be a requirement for an external electric field. Assuming we are talking about a static field this may not require much energy... But depending on field strength and dielectric breakdown considerations it may drive up the solution size / decrease mass and volumetric efficiency.

The power density numbers and efficiency for the system are given without any real context, but seem very high for this sort of system. My assumption is that the the volumetric efficiency refers to the film itself... And it takes a hell of a lot of micrometer-scale film to make up the cubic centimeter needed to hit the claimed whole number Joule energies (over what time frame?). The easiest way to make an efficiency number look good is to draw your system boundary as tightly as possible around your magic widget and ignore the balance of plant hardware needed to make it run.

Example: Does the efficiency number include the electric field apparatus? Inefficiencies in the power conversion electronics? Does the efficiency number reflect use of a hypothetical infinite heat sink?

What's the thermal conductivity and heat capacity of the film? Other salient material properties one would need to engineer a material and interface it with others? Guess we will have to wait for and buy the paper to see... But:

Old man rant: the final paper in all likelihood will not provide enough information to make an intelligent decision about any of these real-world factors. Early in my career you could design experiments and systems off of published resilts, at least in the more reputable IEEE, Physical Review, Nature, etc. Now almost nothing is disclosed... The intent of a scientific paper is now to serve as an advertising rag for whatever septic think tank is performing the work rather than a vehicle for effective peer review.

CEO insisted his email was on server that had been offline for years

Chairman of the Bored

Re: Dumbest dot com bubble company I've ever seen

Fair enough, and my intent is not to be condescending. At the same time is it not reasonable to provide some context?

As I move around the world its amazing the difference between what would seem a reasonable level of knowledge and our actual experience. Example - when I was living in New York I would travel to Ireland and run into people with relatives in NYC and get questions like, "Oh! You're in New York? You must know...." How do you explain the scale of New York? Or for that matter London, etc.

Flip side was a surreal conversation I had with a 20-something Iraqi gentleman outside Ar Ramadi. Late 2005 - definitely not a happy time for Ramadi... We're discussing by flashlight in the middle of absolutely nowhere our favorite restaurants in the Hells Kitchen district of Manhattan. In his NY-accented English he's giving me tips on how to best negotiate prices on flats in Brooklyn.

The world can somehow be extremely small and large simultaneously.

Chairman of the Bored

Re: Dumbest dot com bubble company I've ever seen

@DropBear, excellent point and one to consider carefully. I thought these guys were just a tax dodge to write off fuel for a bad fishing boat habit, but no - they actually had a truck running around. Briefly.

Chairman of the Bored

Serious career advice

Should go without saying - anything emailed to you that tasks you with anything unethical, illegal, or immoral needs to be printed upon a pulped and flattened tree ... witnessed ... and securely stored.

Saved my ass and those of people I regard once. We were tasked by a sociopath with doing some things a little beyond the pale. We refused, dirty deeds were done, and we got hit with the nitrogenous waste as it left the rotating aspirator -- only to find that the organization's mail servers had mysteriously lost everything. But we had duly signed and countersigned dead tree backup! Worth its weight in gold.

Chairman of the Bored

Dumbest dot com bubble company I've ever seen

I used to spend a lot of time in the Florida Keys - for those not in the US this island chain extending from the tip of Florida to within 90mi of Cuba is a bastion of warmth, fishing, boating, free thinking, and general freedom from responsibility.

On a sunny day, do not expect to use the services of a tradesman - they will be fishing. Most days are sunny.

And there, on Lower Matacumbe Key, was the strangest dot com ever: "efish.com". That's right! You order your fish online, they go out and catch it, and deliver it to you. Note this was before the days of omnipresent parcel delivery. I think some bloke in a lorry just drove around and delivered fish. I think they were gone before the paint of their sign fully cured.

There is no perceived IT generation gap: Young people really are thick

Chairman of the Bored

Re: Double entendre?

Interesting; I will have to check these out. I grew up in an ethnic neighborhood within a rust belt US town and sometimes my sense of humor seems to be a bit too brutal for the self-styled brahmins I work with. Within my family and military guys I'm good to go, but it's obvious that within our "homogeneous" culture there are some differences. I wonder just how uniform French humor is across their nation - I'm a lot more familiar with Blighty.

Chairman of the Bored

Double entendre?

The younger generation does seem quite adept at them. I managed to employ one at a meeting last week, at which point a new hire with a well oiled beard told me, "That's funny! I really like your double ender". We got some rather strange looks...

Planned European death ray may not need Brit boffinry brain-picking

Chairman of the Bored
FAIL

Ironic...

...when I worked for a certain large organization with it's headquarters located along the Potomac River, I noticed something odd; every single time a beltway bandit was having a big sales (snow) job on laser weapons ... It would rain, or snow, or the fog would roll in... Or all the above. Without fail. God hates laser weapons!

Pentagon sticks to its guns: Yep, we're going with a single cloud services provider

Chairman of the Bored
Pint

Re: Watch where the contract goes

@DougS, yeah... I read what you said and you are probably 100pct correct. Raytheon, BAE, Northrup, Lockmart, Boeing. Pick one. I was kind of hoping for someone, you know, competent. We should start drinking immediately!

Chairman of the Bored

Why doesn't DoD do this in house?

And why one contract to rule them all? It's not all about controlling the contract, it's about also a bit about the office of the secretary of defense exercising control over the fractious clans within DoD. Given four possible contract awards, each service would immediately end up with it's own incompatible cloud. Because they hate each other. Come budget time, the enemy is not ISIS or whatever is on offer, it's the USN, or USAF, or.... If OSD can find the one cloud to rule them all, then it eliminates a lot of potential stupidity. Even if it costs more, that's a plus.

Anyone remember the NMCI abortion? Navy and Marine Corps were supposed to pioneer the glorious world of outsourcing through this, with Army and Air Force watching. When it turned out to be a total cluster fsck, the Marines pretty much pulled out and USA, USAF ran away screaming - leaving Navy holding the bag.

Not sure what Oracle is complaining about - not obvious to me they have a cloud with enough scale to compete in this game. A wisp of smoke rising from a crack pipe is NOT a cloud.

Intel's security light bulb moment: Chips to recruit GPUs to scan memory for software nasties

Chairman of the Bored

Oh, FFS!

Why, just why, did PHB have to call the tool 'Intel Security Essentials'? That reminds everyone of MS Security Essentials and, um, perhaps does not help ones credibility...

Torvalds schedules Linux kernel 5.0, then maybe delays 'meaningless' release

Chairman of the Bored

The problem is...

...if you are working for PHB, there is tremendous fear and loathing at any disturbance in the force. If the kernel version has three significant digits and the least significant one changes, we can generally upgrade, choose not to, whatever and get our jobs done. When the most significant digit changes? Grab your bug out kit and head for the hills! The accreditation, certification, bustication, masturbation, and every other freakin' *ation department will rise from the dead and demand their pound of flesh.

I'm begging you, no 5.0 please!

So you’ve got a zero-day – do you sell to black, grey or white markets?

Chairman of the Bored
Pint

Re: Ah, Georgia

Have a pint, that link made my day. Forwarded to muly colleagues at Georgia Tech for comment and rebuttal.

Chairman of the Bored

I wonder how often you get a knock on the door...

...and get blackmailed into working for whatever government is on offer in your area. A silver or lead proposition. Given complexity of the civil, tax, and criminal laws in most wester countries it can seem damn near impossible to stay squeaky clean all the time.

Not even a new problem... Supposedly Richelieu wrote "If you give me six lines written by the hand of the most honest of men, I will find something in them which will hang him."

Latest F-35 flight tests finish – and US stops accepting new jets

Chairman of the Bored

Re: Flag: I want a fscking RADIO that WORKS! Beats table.

Mission creep? Yes, we've met. Needs on patrol are rather simple - you need body armor and a weapon that work. You need food and water. You need comm that comms. You need a leader worth following and fellow men you can rely on.

Where it gets all pear shaped is when you need a mission you can believe in and have trouble figuring out what that hell it is. Think I will end this post right there.

Chairman of the Bored
Pint

Re: Warfighter

Dispute Resolution Counselor? What a brilliant turn of phrase. It made me splutter coffee! I'm going to steal this phrase and apply it to myself. Have a pint.a

Back in my days as a Dispute Resolution Counselor, I had an opportunity to take notes for some flag officers at a tech interchange. Basically all the beltway bandits and septic think tanks were trying to get feedback on their hardware wet dreams from men who had actually been on the pointy end. I was just there to fetch coffee, zip flies, and take notes. Effen hillarious:

Septic think tank: "sirs! Do you want lasers? Directed energy?

Flag: no, all I want is a fscking radio that works!

Septic think tank: um... Pause... How about shape memory alloys? VTOL?

Flag: I want a fscking RADIO that WORKS! Beats table.

Septic think tanks: I know! Vertical takeoff sharks with freakin' lasers!

Two whole days of my life, gone.

Best thing about a smart toilet? You can take your mobile in without polluting it

Chairman of the Bored

Re: Seen in an analogue lavatory years ago

Dad says these don't work... That's epic!

I worked for a place the went on an ISO-9000-driven "label evrruthing" schtick. Written on the container of paper seat covers: "ass gaskets". Above the pots "this container is not authorized for storage of classified defense information". Above the urinals "Men! Be security conscious. The future of the world is in your hands."

Security blew a gasket...

Chairman of the Bored

So what video does one stream while on the pot?

Maybe old Star Trek? "To boldly go where no man has gone before...".

Apple leak: If you leak from Apple, we'll have you arrested, says Apple

Chairman of the Bored

Re: Arrested?

Arrested for civil dispute... Well, the United States has a very sordid past of companies corrupting law enforcement. Mainly during the earlier part of the industrial revolution... Union breakers who would modulate your orthopaedic health, provide free tooth extraction services and so forth - with the tacit or active support of law enforcement and local government.

Interesting our supposedly "enlightened" and "post industrial" fruity friends are experiencing a similar testosterone surge.