Posts by DontFeedTheTrolls

Australian prisoner-tracking system brought down by 3PAR defects

Dear El Reg

I know its a well know acronym in Australia, but please stop shortening New South Wales. It looks too much like NSFW which immediately attracts attention from co-workers

Regards

J

TSB's middleware nightmare: Execs grilled on Total Sh*tshow at Bank

Re: Continuity

Are you just trolling?

Yes, there have been issues, but in what universe are any of the above proven today to be the cause. The root cause analysis is still under way, the result of which will probably never be made public. Everything we're being told is rumour and conjecture, including probably what has been fed to MPs.

I reiterate, you're just trolling and that's why you're AC

TSB outage, day 5: What do you mean you can't log in? Our systems are up and running. Up and running, we say!

Re: loading failed for script

It's what happens when the Sale and Marketing people get priority over testing

Sounds like the grammer Nazi's need some comforting....

Their, they're, there

Whoops! Google forgot to delete Right To Be Forgotten search result

Google declined to comment.

Carter-Ruck declined to comment.

Did The Register approach NT2 for comment (since they know his identity), and what was his reply?

Eight months after Equifax megahack, some Brits are only just being notified

Re: Not exactly responsible behavior

The problem with extreme fines is liquidation - if the fines are too large the companies can (and do) shut down. Look at the ICO fines for spam calls and texts

Jail time for the Directors should be considered.

BT pushes ahead with plans to switch off telephone network

"...where broadband rather than voice becomes the primary service"

So what about the recent announcement about "cheaper" line rental for "customers who do not have broadband"? Everyone must now take broadband (by 2025)?

Cutting custody snaps too costly for cash-strapped cops – UK.gov

Perhaps they should be arrested on suspicion of a crime and have a custody photo taken?

PCI Council releases vastly expanded cards-in-clouds guidance

PCI DSS regulations remind me of Douglas Adams and deadlines.

"I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by"

Scotland: Get tae f**k on 10Mbps Broadband USO

Re: Eh?

And there was me thinking that the Scots paid tax the same as the English.

Not the same as the English, they actually pay more since Tax setting power was devolved and the SNP both increased the rate and held the allowance bands at the same level as the previous year.

Uber hid database hack from FTC while FTC probed Uber for an earlier database hack

Re: Europeans are lucky

1) Start a company

2) Break the law

3) Get fined

4) Go Bankrupt

5) Goto 1

Schrems' Facebook case edges closer to ruling over EU-US data flows

While there is a higher principle at stake, two things about Facebook et al need to be reminded:

1) If you're not paying for it, you're not the customer, you're the product being sold; and

2) If you don't want your data sucked up by the US, don't place it on the Internet.

Fear the Reaper: Man hospitalised after eating red hot chilli pepper

Re: Nominative Determinism?

"Capcaisin kills prostate cancer cells"

Maybe so, but the first doctor to try and rub my wedding tackle with a Naga chilli will quickly be sporting a black eye!

I don't think its your wedding tackle they'll be rubbing. More inserting a little further back

'Disappearing' data under ZFS on Linux sparks small swift tweak

In what universe does a version number directly correlate to maturity and stability and therefore exclusively influence ones choice to deploy a product?

1.5 BEEELLION sensitive files found exposed online dwarf Panama Papers leak

Re: Just because you have found a file on the internet doesn't mean it's a security issue.

If the researchers are reporting it is peoples Tax Returns then apart from Child in Chief Trump they shouldn't be public tax returns. Oh, wait, Trump hasn't published his Tax Returns either, only his predecessors did that.

Re: No exposed RDP?

RDP being a protocol to run interactive desktop sessions and not a protocol to directly access files.

Hubble sharpens measurement of distance to ancient cluster

Just popping down to the chemist...

Space is big. Really big. You just won't believe how vastly, hugely, mind-bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it's a long way down the road to the chemist, but that's just peanuts to space.

Douglas Adams.

Pure Storage is to raise HALF a BEEELLLION DOLLARS for mystery corporate slurp

They're going to need that cash to pay the tariffs on the Chinese made components they use...

*Thunk* No worries, the UPS should spin up. Oh cool, it's in bypass mode

Priorities

Once when recovering services without a plan we asked the business for their priority list. Top of the list was the Management Information System (MIS).

Me: "Are you sure you want MIS back first?"

Senior Manager: "Yes, its critical"

Me: "Really?"

Senior Manager: "Don't question me, its top priority!"

Me: "So you want to be able to report that none of your staff are doing any work rather than not be able to report but know they are doing something?"

Senior Manager: "Maybe Workflow should be first priority then"

Ex-ZX Spectrum reboot man threatens sueball over unpaid invoices

Re: Article dated 23 March 2018:

Given you get 9 months to deliver the accounts in the first place, there really shouldn't any excuse for being late at all.

It's not like delivering accounts is inventing or developing something, it is a simple reporting of facts that happened. (#CreativeAccounting)

No, Stephen Hawking's last paper didn't prove the existence of a multiverse

Re: That just about wraps it up for the Great A'Tuin

Don't be silly, it's Turtles all the way down!

Leading by example: UK.gov's secure server setup is patchy at best

If the government can't even secure the front door to their own websites what confidence can we have that they can secure a backdoor into the encryption of our devices and communications?

Google to 'forget me' man: Have you forgotten what you said earlier?

Re: What about Bing?

Winning the case against one search engine sets the precedent that others are likely to be measured against. While no search engine will be obligated to remove any links in any future request, they are at risk of losing very quickly if they are taken to court.

Re: Orwellian

Surely the Germans are rehabilitated now? In which case, you should not be able to use Google to search for the Holocaust.....

Which is where it all becomes even more complicated. I'd suggest the Holocaust remains in the public interest and therefore trumps the right to be forgotten. But there are deniers out there who might feel differently...

FYI: There's a cop tool called GrayKey that force unlocks iPhones. Let's hope it doesn't fall into the wrong hands!

Re: Woah! Some much tin foil, so many hats.....

And if they get my phone ...

Who is "they"?

FBI, MI5, NSA, GCHQ, Security Services, FSB, Police?

The wife, husband, girlfriend, boyfriend?

Identity thief, scammer, extortionist, blackmailer?

KGB, MOSAD, SMERSH, SPECTRE, HYDRA?

New Google bias lawsuit claims company fired chap who opposed discrimination

Sorry, but the problem being highlighted is the politics of the workplace.

If ALL staff in a company left all their biases at home then there wouldn't be a problem. But people don't just switch off bias like that, so all companies need to Police the views of everyone in the workplace.

Guess who else Spectre is haunting? Yes, it's AMD. Four class-action CPU flaw lawsuits filed

Is it a flaw, a manufacturer defect? Is it actually broken?

Or is it a design feature which has unintended consequences and therefore you must make a risk choice on using that feature?

#PlayingDevilsAdvocate

Crunch time: Maplin in talks to sell the business

Re: A great shame, but probably inevitable.

Store share with Edinburgh Woollen Mill?

Apple Macs, iThings, smart watches choke on tiny Indian delicacy

Re: Wouldn't it be fun if someone posted this...

See icon

BBC presenter loses appeal, must pay £420k in IR35 crackdown

Re: Rolling out to private sector is the right thing to do.

"People may leave the public sector, but once applied to private sector, if they leave that, they are going abroad or on the dole. For most, it will just mean sticking with it."

All that will happen is a general acceptance that everything is inside IR35 for privately owned contracting companies and a rates balancing will take place.

The sad thing is that HMRC are advised by the big accounting consultancies who have a vested interest in getting their expensive daily rate "contractors" on site. PWC, EY, Deloitte, McKinsey et al view the individual contractors as cheap competition and are therefore directing HMRC on how to eliminate the competition. In Public Sector land, the real loser is the Public who will need to spend twice as much on Public works than they do today, putting the profits in the pockets of the shareholders of the big consultancies.

PCI Council and X9 Committee to combine PIN security standards

If an XKCD is obligatory then please include it as a hyperlink.

Instructions are in The Register Comments Guidelines

Yes, Assange, we'll still nick you for skipping bail, rules court

Schrödinger's Embassy

It really is Schrödinger situation - until he walks out the door of the Ecuador Embassy nobody knows if he really will end up in the USA.

If he walks out, is arrested and jailed for jumping bail, and a subsequent extradition request is submitted, he's totally vindicated, and it's grounds to reject the request.

If he walks out, is arrested and jailed for jumping bail, then walks free after serving his time, it proves what an asshole he has been and how insignificant he is considered by the world.

If he stays in the Embassy, we'll never know what the outcome would have been. Until he opens the box, we'll never know...

The strange case of the data breach that stayed online for a month

Wayback

Google is not the only entity that caches what is out there and makes it available to anyone ...

It took us less than 30 seconds to find banned 'deepfake' AI smut on the internet

Re: Scope Creep

Which is one of the reasons courts are very particular about the presentation of "taped" evidence.

Never having been interviewed under caution but going on what I've read the machine makes two copies of the interview and the accused (or their legal council) retains one copy (audio and video). This is acceptable in court. That hidden dictation machine in your pocket - probably not admissible in court.

Forensics these days can also detect tampering with recordings. Amongst the methods is analysis of the background electricity hum, something that cannot be faked and cannot be spliced

There was a time when you could phone Tom Baker any time you fancied. Sadly that time is gone.

Tech bad-boy Uber crafts tool to make staff follow the rules in future (er, coding rules, that is)

I'm guessing being open source someone will have checked, but the cynical side of me wonders if this tool sends code back to Uber to steal...

What a Hancock-up: MP's social network app is a privacy disaster

As appeared in a meme elsewhere:

The Onion has been forced to wind down operations as they're struggling to make up stories matching real life today.

Openreach ups investment plans: Will shoot out full fibre to 3 million premises

Re: Rural Vs Urban

Or you just don't bother rushing to fix those broken rural connections...

Who can save us? It's 2018 and some email is still sent as cleartext

" an interesting measurement of lines of code - 71,500 lines is 1 WaP. Which is based on the length of Tolstoy's book "War and Peace" (Oxford World Classics edition)."

One for the Standards Bureau

Tech biz boss slipped Detroit's IT chief bungs in restaurant bathrooms to bag software deals, prosecutors claim

Re: Really?

How much is a seat at the (former) Presidents Club Dinner?

So you accidentally told a million people they are going to die: What next? Your essential guide...

Re: one more thing...

An "All Clear" is fine as long as the person controlling the messages is:

a) been given authorization* to issue an All Clear; and

b) is actually still there to issue the All Clear.

*English (Simplified) option chosen deliberately.

"No, you misunderstand, I'm not saying it's your fault, I'm saying you're getting the blame"

Terror law expert to UK.gov: Why backdoors when there's so much other data to slurp?

Re: Knows His Stuff

"I'm fine with governments having the authority to kick down people's doors. (It's not like anyone has ever been able to stop them doing that anyway.) And by analogy, I'm fine with them seizing people's phones and brute-forcing the content out of them"

Expanding your analogy, I doubt anyone is comfortable suggesting the authorities have a master key to every door lock in the country just so they can get into criminals homes more quickly, so why would anyone be comfortable with a master key for encryption.

Expanding further, the authorities aren't requesting everyone leave the back door to their house accessible (yes, they need to kick that one down as well), so why should anyone suggest devices have an accessible back door.

Location Data from the networks

"...you can get the location data from the phone company. It's almost as good as having someone on their tail the whole time."

I'm still waiting for the authorities first court request of this data when a body is found is suspicious circumstances. What were all the devices near the location in hours around the pertinent time.

Crooks make US ATMs spew million-plus bucks in 'jackpotting' hacks

Re: Physical access

Search "ATM gas attack". Just how far criminals are willing to go with their physical access

Fella faked Cisco, Microsoft gear death – then sold replacement kit for millions, say Feds

With kit of the prices involved I'd be expecting an engineer to deliver the replacement and complete the swap out.

Intel alerted Chinese cloud giants 'before US govt' about CPU bugs

Who's Watching the Watchers

"It is a "near certainty" that Beijing was aware of information exchanged between Intel and its Chinese tech partners because local authorities routinely monitor all such communications"

It is a "near certainty" that Washington was aware of information exchanged between Intel and its ... partners because local authorities routinely monitor

Ex-staffer sues UK's DWP, claims superior blabbed confidential medical info

Must be a slow news week in the IT World if this warrants publication by El Reg.

Daily Fail and Manchester Evening News type rags I can understand, but seriously, El Reg?

New Sky thinking: Media giant makes dish-swerving move on Netflix territory

Re: So much for rural telly...

"Satellite broadcasting is incredibly expensive..."

Satellite broadcasting is comparatively cheap in comparison to setting up ground based transmitters or cabling huge areas. That's how the business was actually able to operate and make profit. Remember Sky(1989) pre-dates ADSL(1998). Dishes aren't going anywhere in a hurry.

NHS: Thanks for the free work, Linux nerds, now face our trademark cops

Re: Good sub-ed needed....

>diodesign "Should be all good now. Software has bugs, articles have typos. We try to avoid them, but we can't catch them all."

Er, that's why you have editors and proof readers, so that you do catch them all.