* Posts by Toc-H-Lamp

15 posts • joined 23 Mar 2017

Who was it that hacked Apple? Ozzie Ozzie Ozzie, boy boy boy!


I'm thinking

Of hiring him myself. Maybe he can rectify the problems I've been suffering since an iOS 11.4.1 update semi-borked my iPad pro.

OK, who is shooting at Apple staff buses in California? Knock it off


It’d look good on your CV though. "Previous employment includes a spell working for Apple as a rear gunner on one of their buses".

Fender's 'smart' guitar amp has no Bluetooth pairing controls


Re: As a practicing[0] guitarist ...

As a player I already use a tablet for all the music so to flip to a different app and make a simple change from a 60’s jangle to a nineties grunge guitar sound would be good. Problem is, anyone within Bluetooth range can do it.

Thousand-dollar iPhone X's Face ID wrecked by '$150 3D-printed mask'


Re: Why oh why

Not sure why you got down voted. I have registered the same thumb print four or five times now. One for when I’m warm, another for cold, one for when my thumb is wet etc.

Please replace the sword, says owner of now-hollow stone


When I read the tales of Arthur and his knights of the round table a few years ago I was put in mind of a bunch of hells angels riding around having punch ups and being given free rein to tax the serfs for whatever they wanted. Why a country would be proud of this as a heritage I couldn't work out.

China to identify commentards with real‑name policy


Re: Scanning Utility bills.

I told eon to go back to sending paper bills. Their system used to email me the fact that a bill was waiting to be read and i had to log in to their absolutely crap system to view it. I'm sure the password was reset after x weeks of me not logging in and my billing cycle was x+1.

Boffins bust AI with corrupted training data


Back in the eighties AI was dubbed fuzzy logic. It was incorporated into various systems but the main difference was that is was quite limited in it's scope. A story used to abound that the military had trained a system to recognise hostile shapes such as tanks and troop carriers and was showing it off to the bigwigs. A battlefield was littered with buses cars tanks and troop carriers. The system did nothing until it rained when it blew everything away. They then noticed all the hostile pictures were taken in the rain. No idea if it was true but it brightened may a dull training course. Fuzzy logic for fuzzy thinkers maybe.

BOFH: That's right. Turn it off. Turn it on


I worked in support for a large copier sales / support company many years ago. A year or so after we launched our first analogue colour copier I took a call from someone at the national forensics laboratory asking how a counterfeit could be detected if it had been made on any of our devices. I replied, in all honesty, that it wouldn't look anything like the original and would be dripping in silicon oil. He seemed quite happy with this response and and far as I am aware it was never tested in court.

Sysadmin bloodied by icicle that overheated airport data centre


Re: Frozen winter shit.

Damn, just posted an almost identical response. I blame the page break in the comments forum.


Re: Frozen winter shit.

Maybe there's no u but there's definitely a Me.

GitHub flub spaffs 8Tracks database, 18 million accounts leaked


Re: Lesser of two evils?

But in next to no time they will have dropped down the scale of current tech companies and will leak like a sieve. Think of Yahoo.

Fancy fixing your own mobile devices? Just take the display off carefu...CRUNCH !£$%!


Cutting edge Technologies

That explains all those Sharp edges then.

Bixby bailout: Samsungers bailing on lame-duck assistant


This article reads as if voice assistance is something all users crave. It could be used as a price differentiator. I'd pay good money to have it permanently disabled.

Revealed: Scammers plaster Google Maps with pins to lure punters from honest traders


Google seems to be struggling to administer a number of aspects of it's business recently. It looks to be a very shoddy setup built around an excellent search algorithm. Where's the emperor's clothes icon.

'Clearance sale' shows Apple's iPad is over. It's done


IPad Pro owner

And very disappointed. I bought it for the size of screen (reading music on smaller screens is a real eye strain) but must admit I expected the OS to be more than the My First Computer crud that is IOS10. Zero access to the file system means each app has to have it's own copy of a file. So, I struggle to get a PDF onto the damn thing, then I have to import it into the sheet music app. That's the same file, now in two different apps. Updating/version control, forget it. If I use email and want to send a bunch of files (say, PDFs to the rest of the band) I have to send a separate email for each file. I can attach as many pictures as I like, but if it's not a picture I have to "Export" each one from the PDF app, and it creates a new mail each time.

iOS, should be spelt POS.


Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2020