Posts by Martin Huizing

Atari Pong at 40: Alcorn talks plastics, pirates and square balls

Re: Ah, brings back memories

You had a potato? We'd be lucky to have potato peel!

Future car tech

Re: drivers?

You can always ride a bike ;)

Robot NIGHTMARE sets new leggy-bot speed record

Honda's Asimo...

Can walk, run, go down stairs *and* dance all without wires. I think the boffins at Honda scoff at this attempt of a running robot. Me believe that, if Honda would put a little bit of effort into this, they could create a running robot that would outrun a real cheetah (instead of calling it one)!

Stolen iPad leads to 780lb crystal meth seizure

What's that? Taken from a workplace moral improving plaque in a meth lab?

~~Never Get High Off Your Own Supply~~

Signed - Dopey (12 to life)

Jabra Halo 2 Bluetooth headset

You are both wrong.

'Halo' here refers to the movie classic called Minority Report. Up-vote if you agree,down-vote if you disagree.

Daniel Craig like Connery, Skyfall helmsman suggests

Am I the first to say it?

Sean Connery was, by far, the best James Bond ever to grace the silver screen. Ever! No Exception!

CRACK made by quakes FOUND ON MOON

Re: I don't care...

... but it did get your attention, didn't it?

Nokia Asha 201 Qwerty phone

Seems Nokia is back to basics.

'Basics' meaning providing a quality phone for a good price. Nokia 3310 anyone? The missus still got one and is working fine.

Dwarf galaxy yields up middle-sized black hole

"Dwarf galaxy yields up middle-sized black hole "

Anything to make humankind less small and insignificant... Can't beat my ego, though ;)

Boy burned in Nintendo sensor substitution

I may be one of few (or many)...

...that when I hear 'candle in the wind', I am thinking about Norma Jean Baker and not Lady Di (who, as a person with creat compassion I have admired till her untimely death.)

The God Box: Searching for the holy grail array

Yes, of course! (hand slapped firmly on face)

More apps will drop off the list? An application (or os) will say ;"No, no, this is too fast for me! I am just an old Operating system/database incapable of receiving this data almost instantly!"

Much like absolute zero is the holy grail of science where huge discoveries have been made getting there, new ways in creating storage solutions are developed and imagined while figuring out how to lower latency.

And the space race was the most important event in human history enabling human kind to reach for the stars. And it is not 'No we can't', it is 'Yes, we did!'

Robot surgery gets virtual at Euro Space Agency

2001 reference:

Open the pod-bay, HAL (unclench thy buttocks)

Chinese company demands $38m, 'apology' from Apple

Slavery wasn't abolished only because of a social concience.It was also abolished... etc...

There, fixed it for you. No need to thank me.

Samsung Series 7 Chonos 15.6in Core i7 notebook

@zanti

What? I mean, what?

American search team fails to find women's G-spot

New Wikipedia entry？:

G-spot: Word of Female invention to counter argue that Men too can't find anything around the house.

Asus Eee Pad Transformer Prime Android Tablet

You can buy mine too...

...and glue a hinge between them and have one work as a virtual keyboard.

Teen net addicts pee in bottles to stay glued to WoW

I doubt this is a problem for Bear Grylls

He'd just call it 'recycling'.

Holographic storage's corpse twitches

When I first heard about holographic storage many years ago...

...people said it was a sure thing and a natural progression over other storage methods and media. You had artists drawing cubes with fancy lasers shooting at it and it would make quantum computing possible. And this was 12 years ago? Last article I read about was the comeback of storage tapes. What the Hell is going on here? Why haven't major names like Seagate, Panasonic or even Big Blue itself not jumped on this? Still patents? Wouldn't they be over InPhase like vultures if there really was something to see here? And still we talk about disks and tapes?

Is it too much to ask to have a tiny cube-like object able to retain my entire 3D porn collection?

I mean, really that much to ask after 12 years?

George Lucas: 'No more Star Wars'

Because...

...most things become complicated after the fact. "If only I could re-write history... Oh, wait!"

Paris 'cause I am sure that, if she could, she'd change a stabbing scene in one of her early productions.

Fans goad Valve for Half-Life 3 gen

Drat! I underestimated your intellect...

Won't happen again.

Just hope and pray...

It won't be another Dud that Nukes the series (Duke Nukem, geddit?)

Parrot puts on headphone gesture gadgetry

Heard you the first time, no need to repeat...

How about setting the volume on the playback device on the desired volume and the headphones to maximum? That solves it, right? Oh and frogs do jump out of the water before it reaches boiling point. I would imagine people would notice a certain increase in volume...

Finally innovation and...

...already nay-sayers commentarding without having tried it out yet. Of course it is a good idea! I have been waiting a long time for those pesky graphite based volume controllers to become obsolete. Still got a few headphones where changing the volume results in a crackling sound reminiscent of old transistor radios. The fewer moving parts, the better IMHO.

Bond Blu-ray box set marks 50 years on film

Do you expect me to buy this set?

No, Mr. Martin! I expect you to download it!

Smartphone accessories

The people buying these gadgest are the same people that...

... don't bother reading manuals.

And they sure as hell won't bother with lengthy reviews. It looks cool? It's a gadget? Want! Now!

Laptop bags: netbooks and tablets

Holy crap, what a rant!

In fact, check this guys previous posts. 12 FREAKING PAGES OF RANTS!

Somebody should capture them all and print it in book form. Seriously! I have never seen anyone write so much about nothing:

"Plus, I got SICK and tired of the volume of that bag allowing me to over stuff it"

WTF, dude? YOU decide how much you put in the bag. The bag doesn't control you!

Are you professionally trolling and getting paid for this? Please let me (us) know.

Plastic semiconductor makes solar cells more efficient

So what you are really saying is...

Giving the solar panels a pair of sunglasses.

Creepy photo-tagging tech slotted into Google+

Patents.

That's all.

2011's Best... E-book Readers

If you ever sit next to me on a plane...

...I will do with yours what I did with the last one that dared to keep his electronic device turned on;

I grabbed his e-reader and snapped it in half.

When he complained I replied (loudly); "Bomb, what BOMB? What the hell are you talking about?"

The BBC Micro turns 30

Roger (later Sophie) Wilson:

All it needed was a woman's touch...

Assange: 'iPhone, BlackBerry, Gmail users - you're all screwed'

I knew something was changing the text messages...

It's called iPhone auto-correct and is the cause of most SMS related awkwardness in history!

Son: WORST DAY EVER

Son: Bring some scissors over. Robby got his cum in my hair.

Mom: It's ok. I have had so much cum in my hair. I don't have to cut it. Just wash it.

Son: I meant GUM mom. GUM.

Son: Now I'm gonna throw up!

Mom: I will be over in 2 mins

Moviemakers on a quest for their real-time 3D Holy Grail

Or...

...restart automatically after installing a 'critical update' through Windows update.

Jew or not Jew app withdrawn from iTunes

If you have frequented this pub in the past, you would know that posts have a tendency to divert from the original topic. Scroll up and you will find most posts have nothing to do with the original item.

Yes racist!!

Why would you 'point out' (nice euphemism) that someone is black or Asian at all? What is the added value? Oh wait! it's exactly that what makes it racist.

You probably meant to say that it would be a nice conversation starter... That I can see.

I grew up in Holland in a multicultural environment with a diversity of people around me and it has helped me understand 'racism' in China when I moved here 8 years ago.

I too met with racism (I'm Caucasian). I've been pointed at, pointed out, shouted at, treated different and even had food thrown at me all because I look different.

These encounters I would treasure because it allowed me to tell my point of view to my middle-school and high-school students in class. We did role playing and I asked situational questions and what would they do if they were in that situation.

What I am trying to say here is that 'understanding' is the key word. Can't we all just get along?

Next beer at the bar is for the person next to me... Whoever he/she is. I don't care.

Japanese boffins demo sound-powered vibe lights

Finally my application can be presented to the patent office.

A sound powered hearing aid device!

"What? Speak louder, I can't hear you!"

Atomic time boffins build better second-watcher

Man at a bar...

Man at a bar asks another man what the time is.

He replies; "Time to buy a watch."

Rumoured iPhone 5 'will have 4in screen' against Jobs' wish

Next generation of phones...

...will have a projector built in.

Robot ostrich spy outpaces world’s fastest sprinters

Beep beep...

Now the North Koreans only need to build a Wile E. Coyote robot to chase this one.

Beep beep!

Mysterious sat-pic China desert markings - EXPLAINED

It's a road marker on cafeine!

http://www.gradientmagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/11/spiders-on-drugs-bowls-guillaume-lehoux-01.jpg

New word of the day: "Lanoitpo"

The US calibrates during their bombing of overseas targets. Two birds one rocket...

3m iPad 3 'retina' screens sent to Apple by month's end

Here in China...

People put plastic protection over their display (anti-glare/reflection) which dulls the display and makes the term 'retina type display' moot.

I bought the Galaxy tab 10.1 and forgot to tell them to put a 'normal' layer of protective plastic on it. After it was treated with the anti-glare sheet, it was like all fine resolution was sanded out of it. Naturally I had to pay extra to get a 'normal' protective layer.

I asked the shop keeper, a keen seller of iPhone 4's, if customers complained about the dullness.

"What dullness?" was her response.

Too many cooks spoil the data warehouse broth

I read...

"Too many cocks spoil the data warehouse brothel..."

Gotta lay off the 4chan...

Sony Walkman NWZ-A866

Sorry but I read 'Apple's media players' (plural) I believe Apple only has one (iPod). Still thinking the author meant 'Sony'...

"But as many will argue, Apple's media players could sound better. Indeed, the Sony NWZ-A866 delivers a quality output,..."

"If you're keen on video, then you might be better off paying an extra £20 and settling for an iPod Touch."

...and games

...and books

...and navigation

Not to mention the higher resolution screen.

"But as many will argue, Apple's media players could sound better. "

Do you mean "Sony's media players could sound better."?

a device this big only used for playing music is a terrible fail in my opinion.

I'm not an Apple fan, but the iPod does seem to tick all the right boxes and the NWZ-A866 does not.

Man builds smartphone dock into arm

I like tittles!

I am a bit surprised to see a hook. Aren't we at a stage that we can have good looking prosthetic arms and hands with fingers that can open and close? (maybe too expensive? Please enlighten me)

Regarding a slot for a phone, Why not get a wrist-watch phone? Seriously! They even operate with blue-tooth ear pieces.

Lenovo ThinkCentre Edge 91z all-in-one PC

really?

That's the same as saying a Ferrari looks like a Jeep because they are both cars.

Samsung signals HD smartphones with supersize screens

Eh... No, she doesn't.

EMC exec flames El Reg

Donkey-punch?

Dell, Intel rope Texas-sized 10 petaflopper

"The MICs deliver a factor of 11 better performance per unit of rack space."

Cue 'Spinal Tap' comments.