Re: These aren't the Republicans you're looking for
> Yes, no one said all Republicans are spray-tanned, racist, misogynists without any idea on how to do anything other than "Make American Great Again For Me And My Billionaire Man-Buddies To Steal Anything And Everything That Is Not Nailed To The White House Floor!"
I'll buy that for a dollar. They aren't spray-tanned, but everything else is spot on. The Republicans are the outgrowth of the losing side of the civil war and you may remember what kicked that off: Racism. And the Republicans were there during the race riots of Omaha where they burned black people in the public square. They were against interracial marriage, women's sufferage, and categorically every civil rights advancement in this country has been over their objections. So maybe nobody said it here, but sure as hell it can be said!
> It's the fringe-idiot-muggles in charge that are a problem for the US and the world.
That's a comfortable lie we tell ourselves. Yes, it's the fringe. It's a crazy minority. That, my friend, is a lie. These people don't keep getting elected year over year because they are "fringe". This *is* the face of the Republican party and best you square with that. They're on the party ticket. Those endorsements didn't just land on them by accident anymore than a penis lands on a vagina by accident.
> Google would be a better caretaker of the US than any criminal politician,
A criminal one? Maybe. A regular one? No. Google is a business and you do not want a government that is only motivated by profit. We've had a few of those in human history. It ended badly.
> All politicians are criminals.
Another comfortable lie we tell ourselves. Politics is the same everywhere; There are three rules and they are invariate. They are not limited to government but apply to every hierarchical social organization, everywhere, ever. And those rules are:
1. No Man Rules Alone
You need people to work for you. Governments need bureaucrats, police, military, tax collectors... Rulers don't do that, but they need it. These are your keys to power. They can be generals, business owners, the influencers (social elite). Whoever they are, they exist, and you need them on your side. Aaaand you do that by giving them gold, money, resources. And if someone else is doing that... then you need to make a compelling case to sway enough of them to support you; Aaand you do that by promising them *more* gold, money, resources than the other guy is giving them. It's that simple.
2. Control the treasure
Remember those resources you need to feed your keys to power? You need control over it to do that. You need the key to the treasury. You need control of the taxes, the wealth, the resources. If you lose control of it, you will be replaced.
3. Minimize key supporters
The more keys to power you have... the less treasure there is to go around. Which in the ever-shifting web of alliances and people jockeying for position means it's easier for someone to sway them to their side. The fewer there are, the more you can give to them, and the stronger your position. If you are giving resources to someone who isn't going to keep you in power, you're throwing it away. It's the same thing as giving it away to the people -- and it makes it that much easier for someone else to come in promising NOT to do that... and replace you.
Everything else is irrelevant. Your job as a politician is about these three things, and only these three things. What we think of as "criminal" or "corrupt" is, in reality, politicians doing their job. They're recruiting new keys, redistributing the wealth they control, and are trying to kick out people that are a drain on those resources. People who call politicians criminal or corrupt are, bluntly, people too stupid to understand how the game is played, or refuse to. And of those who refuse... well, someone's going to do it and why shouldn't it be you? You're choosing not to play and in so doing are allowing the very thing you claim to despise continue to happen. The only way to change the system is to play it. And who knows... maybe you are The Chosen One who will bring balance to the Force or whatever, and change a pattern that has continued for the past twenty thousand years, and is seen even amongst non-primates in some form.
> Fucking muggles and their "two party system."
The two party system is an inescapable, statistically inevitable, consequence of how we vote: First past the post voting. It's too complicated to get into, and this post is already too long, but go lookup alternative voting systems. Until we change how we vote, it will always be a two party system. Even if by miracle a third party rises up and comes into power... it will only be to displace one of the other two and return to a two party system... and then *that* party will, because of statistical inevitability, shift politically to occupy the former's position. This *cannot* be changed. It is very nearly like gravity in that it will happen. It has always happened. And it will continue to happen. It's the only possible long-term outcome of a first past the post voting system.