* Posts by Mike Moyle

1715 publicly visible posts • joined 8 Feb 2007

Retailers risk libel nightmare over 'no-work' database

Mike Moyle

Well, if they made it completely fair...

... You know, like if they gave prospective employees access to the database and included information:

... like listing managers who promise benefits then just "accidentally" never have enough hours available for you to qualify...

... like listing managers who hire for one job but give assignments that should be done by a higher-level and don't pay accordingly...

... like listing managers who expect services outside of normal workplace duties ("Can you run out and pick up my dry-cleaning...?")...

... like listing managers who expect "services" (*WinkWinkNudgeNudge*) outside of normal workplace duties...

No...?

Hardly useful, then.

The battle of Lesbos: Exclusive combat pic

Mike Moyle

@ Solomon Grundy; @ Dave

@ Solomon Grundy

"I hope these reenactments are a regular feature of El Reg. A bit of exclusive material is exactly what is needed and these are better than BOFH by a long shot."

Agreed on point 1, MORE of these...

But, "...better than BOFH by a long shot"? Them's fightin' words!

@ Dave

"(To the tune of "Good Ship Venus")

'Twas on the good ship Navratilova..."

BWAAA-HAA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA...!

Well done, Sir!

Dogs reduce allergies in kids

Mike Moyle
Coat

Re: Old news

"Penguin because its fur contains dust and germs and little bitey things."

Actually, if penguins have made the evolutionary leap from birds to mammals, that probably rates as NEW news! (...or were you having a go at the personal hygiene of Linux programmers?)

Lightning-zapgun maker gets more US gov cash

Mike Moyle
Coat

@ Andy ORourke

"laser-enhanced electric plasma lightning blaster cannons"

Who wouldnt want one of those?

Perhaps this'll be the next Bruce Willis series: "LEEPL Weapon"!

El Reg visits Hyderaspace and sees bullocks, giant rabbits

Mike Moyle
Coat

Nice pictures

1 - "...Call 007 SHANTY TOWN"...? Were the rude boys wailin' a' shanty town?

2 - That lawn had a sign identifying the "Safe Zone". Was that marking the "keep off the grass" area or the "keep away from the exits" area?

3 - That rabbit has a door in his butt...

The thought that someone has to occasionally open that door and reach into the giant rabbit's ass is just creepy.

...and not in a good way.

Governator outs Dubya's global-warming 'time bomb'

Mike Moyle
Coat

Nice to see...

It's good to see that Arnold is serious about air quality, greenhouse gasses, and fuel economy.

Has he gotten rid of the Hummer, yet?

Spike Milligan goes mobile

Mike Moyle
Thumb Up

Ah, Dear Mister Milligner...

@Richard:

I agree with Chris Simmons - you are an evil bastard.

...Funny, though...!

OTOH - @Chris Simmons:

I don't care for baboons. "Try one of my chimpanzees; they're milder."

DARPA looking at 'Z-Wing' stratocruiser

Mike Moyle
Boffin

A couple of thoughts...

The assumptions here seem to be that these would be camera platforms and would only look straight down. At six miles up, curvature of the earth should give a horizon close to 120 miles away (? - too lazy to do the math...).

While resolution near the horizon would doubtless be crap for image-based intel collection, at altitude, several of these cruising in a path over international waters and South Korean territory could, in theory, put almost all of North Korea under surveillance. And the atmospheric blurring that might hinder photographic work at distance wouldn't affect signals collection at all.

UK Office of Government Commerce cracks one off

Mike Moyle
Thumb Up

I'm amazed!

"...not inappropriate to an organisation that's looking to have a firm grip on government spend!"

A Government spokesdrone with a sense of humo(u)r...?

Isn't that, like, one of the signs of the Apocolypse or something?

The American way of bioterror - an A-Z of ricin crackpots

Mike Moyle

WExcuse me...?

"Michael Crooker, a Massachusetts man now serving time as a convicted felon, was arrested by the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms in 2004 for sale of an air rifle equipped with a silencer."

Okay... I'm familiar with BB and pellet guns... The only other air-powered gun that I know of is a paintball type, which I've never used, so I'm not sure how loud they actually get...

...But a SILENCER on an airgun?!!?

That just seems so wrong.

El Reg celebrates 10th birthday

Mike Moyle
Thumb Up

Happy Birthday!

Congratulations, and thanks for all the fun/news/murdered brain cells!

Feds to collect DNA of every person they arrest

Mike Moyle

Re: I really dont understand the arguments against DNA collection

I don't have the reference in front of me, but I've seen a line attributed to Lyndon Johnson that says (IIRC) "Never look at how much good a piece of legislation will do if it's well implemented; rather look at how much harm it will cause if it's poorly implemented."

This DVD will self-destruct in 48 hours

Mike Moyle
Boffin

Alternatively...

Is there any chemical that will break down polycarbonates at room temperature that isn't also massively hazardous to the touch?

My guess is that the coating applied is one that hazes over as time passes, rather than one that actually breaks down the surface.

If that's the case, I wonder whether one of those gadgets for polishing minor scuffs out of CDs would be sufficient to remove the coating, restoring the disk to full-lifetime use...?

@ Sandpir8

"Even with the almighty dollar now relegated to the position of a pygmy vs. the Euro, us yanks (whilst jobless and subsisting on our public assistance cheques) can rent DVD for $1.00 / day. One dollar vs. six plus??? You do the maths!"

_We_ Yanks

1 - rarely say "whilst";

2 - may receive assistance _checks_, and;

3 - and studied _math_, not "maths".

Are you a ringer, or are you just trying to posh it up for the Reg?

London store brews £50-a-poop cat-crap coffee

Mike Moyle

A few point...

To all the "Who'd pay £50...?" posters:

"The promotion runs until the end of the month, and >>>> all proceeds will be donated to Macmillan Cancer Support. <<<<."

It's a charity do. Read the frickin' article. It doesn';t NORMALLY cost that much.

@ Joseph Boren:

Are you sure you aren't thinking of Coors, rather than Budweiser? Not that Bud has anything to brag about, but Coors is the one that always used to brag about their Rocky Mountain water. (Pity they never added any beer-like components to the water... OTOH, it sounds like the rafters were at least adding the color for them!)

@ Sarah Bee:

I can take or leave caviar, but a nice bit of liver and onions, a kidney pie, or a nice tender beef-tongue sandwich (washed down with a Cel-Ray soda)... Yum! (Why, yes; my dietary habits *DO* make some people blanch...)

Never tried the cat-poo coffee, but I miss the "Monsooned Malabar" (Left out on the back porch to age during the monsoon months) that I used to be able to get here. Now THAT was a tasty coffee. Haven't seen it locally in several years...

Ofcom slaps Beeb for Live Earth swearing

Mike Moyle
Coat

A couple of points...

I don't know about things in the UK, but on this side of the pond any live event used to be broadcast on a seven-second delay. It was still, effectively, real-time but was intended to give the director/engineer time to note the problem, switch to the delayed stream, and hit the squawk-button.

Does no one do this anymore...?

OTOH - I can see a BBC announcer reading the apology at 8:59:

"The BBC would like to apologize for broadcasting the word "motherfucker" during the family-viewing period. It was totally unaccept... (Errrmm... Just a moment... Are we allowed to say that... Oh, dear...!) Uhhm... Sorry about that..."

Botanist sues to stop CERN hurling Earth into parallel universe

Mike Moyle
Coat

Hmmm...

...so if the LHC goes online in May, 2008... then, allowing for, say, a few months of testing before they go for The Big One, 50 months for the Earth to fall into the black hole would put as at just about December, 2012...

Looks like the Mayans were right, after all

Mike Moyle
Coat

Sooo...

If he served the the papers to his wife, as am officer of the corporation...

And appeared at the trial as an officer of the corporation...

And won a summary judgement against himself...

Doesn't that mean that he and his wife need to pay THEMSELVES the back salary, plus interest, plus whatever damages the court assigns, plus both sides' court costs?

Damn! They're gonna get so rich from this suit that they may have to declare bankruptcy!!

(...and now my head hurts...)

Aussie laser-pointer dazzle attacks on airliners: Bad

Mike Moyle
Boffin

@ Pete

"As was pointed out, laser beams spread. It's only a few milli-radians but the wider the beam, the lower the brilliance and the less dazzling effect. The further away the wider the beam and the lower the light intensity again. Inverse square - the effect falls off rapidly."

If I'm reading you correctrly, you believe that there could be no momentary dazzle at all from a laser passing across the pilot's eyes at distance? Because, as I see it (sorry) having spots in one's eyes, suddenly, in the final five or ten seconds before touching a 250-ton aircraft to the ground could be... disconcerting, at best.

You only need enough power to disorient or distract the pilots, not completely blind them.

Also, I don't recall any mention of the timing of these events but, if they took place at night, with the pilots' pupils somewhat dilated from looking at dimly-illuminated controls in a dimly-lit cockpit so as to not affect their night vision, the dazzle-effect from a laser COULD be significantly increased.

"Next, passengers not seeing the effect: The size of the window is irrelevant. Provided you are close enough - e.g. in the window seat your field of view is as good as a forward-looking pilot's. There should be some reports from passengers"

If the idiot with the laser is on the glide path, with the plane coming towards him, then the passengers looking out the side windows - which by definition, are pretty much parallel to the direction of flight and, hence, the laser beam - would be looking PERPENDICULAR to the beam, as opposed to the pilot who is looking basically TOWARDS it. Big difference. As an experiment, if you have a generic laser pointer, hold it perpendicular to your line of sight and shine it at the wall. Can you actually see the beam as it goes through the air? Unless you are in a dusty/smoky room, probably not, because the light is all moving in one direction, and not bouncing out at every angle possible. You generally need to have a fog, smoke, or similar medium to see any "beam" effect, making it unlikely (not to say impossible, but highly unlikely) that the passengers would see anything at all from a laser aimed from the front.

"Third, to actually illuminate a pilot, as has been pointed out you have to be virtually on the flight path. Someone under the aircraft or to the side can't see the pilot and (more to the point) the pilot can't see them, even out of the corner of their eyes."

Pete, the pilots are LOOKING DOWN AT THE RUNWAY ON FINAL APPROACH. Therefore, they are also looking at anybody who is, say, near either END of the runway.

As an example, I would suggest that you fire up Google Earth and look up LAX. The runways at Los Angeles International airport all run, basically, east-west since the prevailing winds come off the land during the day and off the ocean at night. At one end of the runways is the beach (with a parking area), at the other end is the San Diego Freeway, and then a residential area, with lots of windows for stupid people to sit in, looking straight down the runway at approaching aircraft, the flight-crews of which may be looking directly at them on approach.

"Nearly there.... I still don't buy the ability of a person to hand-aim a laser onto a moving target over a mile away for any significant time. It's simply not possible and I defy anyone to prove otherwise. As a benchmark, the moon subtends an angle of 0.5 degree - you can't hand-aim a laser at that for any time, let alone the front of a plane - let alone the pilot's window - let alone the pilot's eye - even for a millisecond, even if they weren't moving."

Again, you ignore the fact that, if the target is approaching the shooter then it is, for all practical purposes, stationary - making keeping the beam on target significantly easier.

I carry a small 15-power telescope - pretty much the highest power scope that I can use hand-held - in my jacket pocket. If I am riding down the highway in a vehicle, I can keep signs over the highway directly in front of me centered quite easily, while looking out the side window at something as we pass it is much more difficult. In the first case the position of the target remains almost constant relative to me, while in the latter it is changing rapidly.

Thailand cracks down on cut-price castrations

Mike Moyle
Coat

@ Ashley Pomeroy

"What happens to all those testicles? Do they plant them in the ground?"

That's where Dick-taters come from.

T5 opening turns into Airplane 3.0

Mike Moyle
Coat

If it's any consolation...

...You're making us feel much better about Denver International, thank you very much!

US Navy sails the open seas

Mike Moyle
Coat

Let's get them out of the way right off the bat...

...shall we...?

"...CHIPS, the Department of the Navy Information Technology magazine..."

Do they include articles on "Chips of the Line"?

...paeans to "men who go down to the sea in chips..."?

...recommendations on keeping your intranets "chip-shape and Bristol-fashion"?

So what's the easiest box to hack - Vista, Ubuntu or OS X?

Mike Moyle
Coat

I'd like to see one additional piece of data.

What would make this particularly interesting to me is if the sponsors had some way of tracking the number of discrete attacks on each machine during the contest.

That is, at the point that laptop "A" gets pwned, I'd like to know what number of attacks it sustained, compared with "B" and "C".

I don't suppose that it would really make a difference, I'd just find it interesting to see it graphed out, since it would presumably imply something about the contestants' mindset - which one they felt they were likeliest to be able to get into.

On the other hand, it might be really amusing if some attacker managed to "piggy-back" on another's work - either intentionally or inadvertently - an independent attack by attacker "X" that strikes right after attacker ""Y" has caused a buffer overflow, say, but before "Y" can follow up on it... I'd suggest a Texas-Cage match to see who gets to take the laptop home, in that case.

Of course, if someone were REALLY devious, they could spend the duration of the event trying to subvert all of the other contestants' machines on the network while they are all busy frantically trying to break in to the "official" target boxes. That way, the "winner" might go home with a new laptop, but the REAL winner would "go home" with fifty!

Three questions for the Jesus SDK

Mike Moyle

What I'd be curious to see...

...is a VOIP over wifi product and - since it doesn't support bluetooth - a dockable headset for the iPod Touch.

If I'm reading all of this right and the iPhone/Touch can connect to a network over wifi, and VOIP over wifi apps will be permitted for the phone, then this could bypass AT&T altogether for anyone who has a Touch and is regularly near a wireless access point...

...or am I completely off here?

US Army funds $10m bat-droid

Mike Moyle
Boffin

Pedantry alert

"...UM team seems to feel that robo-ornithopter is the natural way to go."

Technically, wouldn't that make it a chiropterthopter...?

...I'm just askin', is all.

Convicted cybercrook stands for election in the Ukraine

Mike Moyle
Coat

Re: A cracker as a politician?

Not unusual - the Alabama state legislature (among others) used to be full of them.

Richard Gere not obscene, rules Indian court

Mike Moyle
Coat

Hmmmm...

"A two-judge bench headed by the Chief Justice of India, KG Balakrishnan, declared: "Richard Gere is free to enter the country. This is the end of the matter.""

...Doesn't say anything about LEAVING the country, does it?

Microsoft officially 425 years behind the times

Mike Moyle
Coat

But don't worry...

IE8 Standard will be as leap year compliant as they can make it.

El Reg decimates English language

Mike Moyle
Happy

But, wait... There's more...!

20-some years ago, I used to hang about with some journalists, one of whom had worked for a newspaper in the American south.

In dealing with politicians there, he noted that there were certain words that some of them simply could NOT pronounce correctly and, if the interview or press conference was boring, he would try to maneuver them into using one or more of them on the record.

He counted it as a total win if he could get them to refer to the "Amurrican nucular bidness."

(And, Lester... are you really from Crete?)

How Phorm plans to tap your internet connection

Mike Moyle
Coat

Give them SOME credit...

"Phorm's Open Internet Exchange (OIX)"

At least they ADMIT that they're being oiks!

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=oik

Vote now for your fave sci-fi movie quote

Mike Moyle
Coat

All those, and not:

"I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass... and I'm all out of bubblegum." -- Nada "They Live"

I yam disgustipated!

Wipe the floor with Space Invaders

Mike Moyle
Coat

Now that's just wrong...

"(...) you’ll be glad to know this one measures 640 x 400mm (...)"

Would it have been so difficult to have made it 640 x 480, just to really nail down the Geek factor?

It's just this sort of shoddy planning that is weakening our ability to compete and unraveling the very fabric of society, etc., etc., blah, blah...

Gilligan's bomb: Is it time to panic yet?

Mike Moyle
Thumb Down

Re: "so what is being said here? "

@ StopthePropaganda

And, just to complete your failure for today:

Rupert Murdoch became a naturalized American citizen on September 4, 1985, in order to meet the legal requirement that only US citizens could own American television stations, and eventually founded that bastion of Commie-Pinko liberal socialism, Fox News network...

...Just thought you should know.

Mike Moyle

Re: detonator

Aloha Airlines #243 has already been mentioned, but here is a good synopsis of the NTSB report with numerous photos:

http://www.ec.erau.edu/cce/centers/edwards/SF335/CaseStudy1Pres.htm

Decompression at 24,000 feet took roughly half of the fuselage height (everything from the cabin floor up) for 18 feet of the aircraft's length and the crew made a controlled (albeit difficult) landing.

Odeon kicks Rambo in the 'nads

Mike Moyle
Coat

So, I've gotta ask...

Am I the only person that's been referring to this movie as "Ramb-Old"...?

Want to snoop on your neighbors? Come and work in Wisconsin

Mike Moyle
Coat

Re: Good old US integrity

@y Seán

"Picture this scenario, data collected from all over the EU passed by the ever loyal spooks of England to their US masters.(...)"

Why worry about it...? The disks will get lost by the Royal Mail so they'll never get here.

Problem solved!

Subprime PC retailer coughs up $5m fine

Mike Moyle
Coat

Why they're called that

...Because "Blue Meany" was already taken?

Taliban demand night-time cell tower shutdown

Mike Moyle
Thumb Down

Have they considered...

...that if the civilian cell towers are shut down, then the only radio emissions in the hinterlands are likely to be theirs, making them big, glowing targets - perfect for turning into big, glowing craters...?

Gotta love it!

(Icon chosen because it's so fascinating to see someone give himself the Pollice Verso!)

Space shuttle descends: Satellite turkey-shoot to commence

Mike Moyle
Coat

A few thoughts...

What happens to the interceptor if it doesn't intercept? Where would the pieces of *IT* be expected to come down?

Also, this IS one of the ballistic-kill-type interceptors, yes? Is it one of the shotgun-shell-full-of ball-bearings type, or just one big hunk-o-metal? If the former, how much higher than the satellite's orbit do any pellets that miss the target go? Presumably, higher than any "debris cloud" from the target, since there would have been no loss of energy when the pellet's momentum was (partially) transferred to whatever piece of debris it created. Do we know if this added altitude was included in their debris-cloud calculations, or might we have a bonus screw-up?

And even better, now anyone who wants to nuke us knows that their best bet is to do it when there's a storm wherever the interceptors are based, since apparently they can't launch if the water's choppy.

Somehow, none of this actually makes me feel any more secure...

(Mine's the one with the sandwich-board reading "The end is near!" attached.)

Fire extinguisher resolves German smoking dispute

Mike Moyle
Coat

Re: Better off

@ AC:

"World's better off not having those two nimrods polluting the gene pool together."

... I fixed that for you.

Microsoft immune system rejects execs

Mike Moyle
Coat

Re: "MS isn't as evil as news corp"

Don't waste the opportunity by putting them up against the wall...

I'm imagining Steve "ChairBane" Ballmer vs. Rupert "The Fox" Murdoch in a steel-cage death-match on Pay-Per-View...

(...or maybe Tina Turner singing "We Don't Need Another Zero" before a "Blunderdome" match, perhaps...?)

Polaroid to close instant film plants

Mike Moyle
Boffin

Re: Time Zero

@ Ashley Pomeroy

"(...). The remaining Polaroid film is neither fish nor fowl, it doesn't have a practical use and arty people don't want it."

Clearly, you don't know the right arty people.

My daughter is a photographer and loves taking shots with her old bellows-type Polaroid, which she's converted to a pinhole camera. The longer exposure times - up to two minutes - gives an incredibly dense and rich image unavailable any other way.

eBay gets negative feedback about ban on negative feedback

Mike Moyle
Coat

Positive feedback

It's all in how you word it:

"I cannot praise this seller too highly!"

"This is the best counterfeit xxxx I ever bought!"

"Since I really wasn't expecting this xxxx to work, it FULLY MET MY EVERY EXPECTATION!"

"If you can purchase xxxx from this seller, you should consider yourself extremely fortunate."

What...? It's all positive...!

Bunker-nobbling US megabomb test delayed

Mike Moyle

Not necessarily Iran

May we also assume that these would work on Afghani/Pakistani caves?

US Navy to test fire electric hypercannon

Mike Moyle

A couple of thoughts...

1 - Instead of a "slug" shot, could a canister containing a number of flechettes be fired? Hypersonic shot-shells in a cone formation actually sound feasible against airborne targets, as well as against vessels and battle-area targets.

2 - "Velocitas Eradico"... "Speed Kills"?

Critics split over DDoS attacks on Scientology

Mike Moyle
Coat

Re: "If you live by the sword "

... you don't live by the plowshare?

DC Comics to kill off Batman?

Mike Moyle
Coat

Re: Nobody stays dead...

"...in the comics, except Gwen Stacy, Uncle Ben and Jason Todd, it has been famously noted by smarter readers than I."

...and Jason is back...

(sad, really...)

Germans send teen tearaway to Siberia

Mike Moyle
Coat

Good idea...

...build his physique hauling water and teach him how to wield an axe.

The Dark Knight - 2008's biggest movie?

Mike Moyle
Boffin

I can guarantee...

..that "Wolverine" won't make the top *100* of 2008.

...since it's still casting, hasn't started filming, and is currently scheduled for a May 1, 2009 release... (http://www.comics2film.com/index.php?a=project&j=448)

(Icon selected because it's the geekiest one available.*)

(* except for the penguin, of course.)

Fertility watchdogs approve first human-animal hybrids

Mike Moyle
Coat

# Jason

Looks like it's already happened...

Clearly, she has the brains of a Chihuahua!

Online gamer murders rival clan member

Mike Moyle
Thumb Down

Re: Huh?

"See the twist? Games for adults are fine they shouldnt be banned and blamed for anything, This is the thing though, So many people buy/make avalible these adult rated games to kids and even infants its a joke (yes my brother in law thinks its ok for my nephew(6) to play CS:S) It makes them think guns are ok, that knifes are ok, that killing someone is ok, thats what needs to be tackled enforcing the ratings on the games and educating people that an 18 rated game means 18, Not blaming us gamers and taking away our games."

Possibly true, but irrelevant: 22 y.o. assailant, 33 y.o. vic.