* Posts by Ochib

348 posts • joined 22 Mar 2016


BOFH: Where do you think you are going with that toner cartridge?


Re: We had the opposite ...

Rincewind had one bucket of coal delivered per Job Title he had, as the famous wizzard has 19; he get 19 buckets per day, one for each role he fills--in the summer, his office is an inferno, since if he does not burn all his coal, he will receive no more--in line with Ridcully's order that to receive a replacement, one must use up all of the previous supply of anything

Supercomputer lab swaps lead-acid UPS batteries for alkaline gear


Welcome to the Li-on's den

Now the batteries have come of age

Buying a USB adapter: Pennies. Knowing where to stick it: Priceless


Re: The Old Engineer and the Hammer

that would be an ecumenical matter

South Yorkshire to test fiber broadband through water pipes


This reminds me of the Google April Fools

Google TiSP (short for Toilet Internet Service Provider)


India bans drone imports to help local manufacturers take off


obvious loophole

Just fly the drones in using a drone

Boffins demonstrate a different kind of floppy disk: A legless robot that hops along a surface


Are they all called Zem

And do they speak in a mixture of willomies, globbers, flurs, and glurries

Leaked footage shows British F-35B falling off HMS Queen Elizabeth and pilot's death-defying ejection


maxim 32

Anything is amphibious if you can get it back out of the water

Boffins find way to use a standard smartphone to find hidden spy cams


Re: Haven't movie theaters been doing it for years?

Got kicked out of the cinema today just because I took my own food! My argument was the prices they charge there are outrageous, and besides I haven't had a barbecue for ages...

Say what you see: Four-letter fun on a late-night support call


Re: The joys of the phonetic alphabet

You mean

F for 'vescence

I for Novello

L for leather

M for 'sis

Config cockup leaves Reg reader reaching for the phone


The Onosecond


Euro Parliament backs ban on cops using blanket facial-recognition surveillance


Thank goodness we have left the EU


Priti Patel

Is it a bridge? Is it a ferry? No, it's the Newport Transporter


Re: Wind Strength

As Gale comes from the Middle English gale, a general word for wind of any strength, even a breeze. A force 6 is technically a gale


Re: What about the Arizona bridge?

Working on the site

From morning 'till night

That's livin' alright

Tech contractors fume over payday outage at Giant Pay after it sniffs 'suspicious activity'



Looks like there is more to this than meets the eye

"Upon detection of suspicious activity on our network on 22nd September 2021, we immediately assembled a response team including IT data experts and specialist lawyers, and we are currently working with the highest priority to resolve this issue. As part of the investigation and as a measure of caution, we have proactively taken our systems offline and suspended all services temporarily. We are also liaising with regulatory bodies to investigate and remediate the situation. We can confirm that our databases are encrypted.

As an interim measure, and to ensure that payment is made to your account on 24 September, we will pay you the same amount that was paid to you last week. This will be paid via Faster Pay and will be in your account by the end of the day. As soon as possible, we will confirm that your payroll is back to normal. We appreciate that this is not ideal, but we wanted to ensure that you receive a payment.

We apologise for the disruption and appreciate your patience whilst we investigate this matter and work to restore functionality."


Angry birds ground some Google Wing drones in Australia


It's happened before

The mighty Australian army were defeated by Emus

How long till some drunkard puts a foot through one of BT's 'iconic, digital smart city communication hubs'?


Re: Oh....really?

Was it this article?



Plug your phone into a random USB Socket

what's the worst that can happen.


BOFH: Pass the sugar, Asmodeus, and let the meeting of the Fellowship of Bastards … commence


Re: IoUT - Internet of Useless Things


The unit of measure for fatbergs is not hippopotami, even if the operator of an Australian sewer says so


Omnibus is derived from Latin and means "to, for, by, with or from everything". ...



According to the Oxford English Dictionary, the plural of Hippopotamus is Hippopotamuses (see also Octopus and Octopuses)

Fired credit union employee admits: I wiped 21GB of files from company's shared drive in retaliation


$10k Cost

They'll have spent $2k just in staff time in meetings to work out what happened, why it happened, how it happened and how to fix it.

Then there's the server rebuild, detailed analysis of which data can and can't be recovered, the recovery itself, validating the recovery, reacquiring the data that couldn't be recovered, communications and customer management activities around that and, well, $10k feels quite cheap.

Logitech Bolt devices support secure Bluetooth Low Energy – but forget the 'Unifying Receiver'



Relevant XKCD


Leaked Guntrader firearms data file shared. Worst case scenario? Criminals plot UK gun owners' home addresses in Google Earth


Re: Storage

muzzle-loading pistols are legal


Re: Storage

Nope. The guidance states

"Under the Firearms Rules 1998, a prescribed safekeeping condition is attached to all firearm and shotgun certificates. It is an offence not to comply with these conditions. The maximum penalty for this offence can be up to 6 months in prison, or a fine, or both.

The safekeeping condition attached to firearms or shotgun certificates requires that the guns and section 1 ammunition must be stored securely to prevent, so far as is reasonably practicable, unauthorised people taking or using them. Any other person who does not hold a firearm or shotgun certificate is included in the term ‘unauthorised’.

When a gun or section 1 ammunition is being used or the holder has the gun with him for some purpose connected with its use, transfer or sale, reasonable precautions must be taken for the safe custody of the gun(s) and section 1 ammunition.

The condition does not apply to the ammunition for a shotgun. However, as a matter of common sense, you should take reasonable precautions for its safe custody."


Think you can solve the UK's electric vehicle charging point puzzle? The Ordnance Survey wants to hear about it


Re: Park for Night

Ethanol has has zero issues apart from taking farm land out of production

Lost in IKEA? So, it seems, is Windows


For a real Ikea horror story

Read SCP-3008

A Whopper of a bork for seekers of pre-flight nosh


Re: How long is the flight?

Trains are quicker (just) but about 3 times the price

BOFH: 'What's an NFT?' the Boss asks. In this case, 'not financially thoughtful'


Re: Turings?

Like Scottish notes in England

living in England and I'm not likely to see many of them. They're likely to be treated as dodgy cos they're not issued by a English bank

Elevating bork to a new level (if the touchscreen worked)


Re: As the building is in the UK

Yes it should, and don't call me shirley

Wireless powersats promise clean, permanent, abundant energy. Sound familiar?



Just call it project Icarus and then get someone to hold the earth hostage from an ice hotel

Tesla battery fire finally flamed out after four-day conflagration


Re: Concrete

Only if the front falls off

Journo who went to prison for 2 years for breaking US cyber-security law is jailed again


Re: Monitoring software?

According to the indictment, they (the US Government) sort 3 year of supervised release. The monitoring software was properly put there by the Government

Iffy voltage: The plague of PC builders and Hubble space telescope controllers alike


Breaking the cardinal rule of IT

No change Fridays

UK's data watchdog probes use of private email to discuss government business at the Department of Health


Re: open goal I should imagine

That email address breaks the Scunthrope rule and can't be used on AOL

Radioactive hybrid terror pigs have made themselves a home in Fukushima's exclusion zone


Wars fought between Humans and Animals 1

Wars won by Animals 1 (Emus V the Oz army)

‘Fasten your seat belts, raise your tray table, and disconnect your Bluetooth headsets from the entertainment unit’


I am and don't call me Shirley

Toyota reveals its work on an honest-to-goodness cloak of invisibility


I see Q branch has leaked information again

They must have let Toyota have a good look at the Martin V12 Vanquish/Vanish

Blue passports, French service provider: Atos bags £21m UK Passport Office deal


Re: "become completely digital"

Welsh signs gone wrong


FBI paid renegade developer $180k for backdoored AN0M chat app that brought down drug underworld


Re: Huh?

In March "canyouguess67" posted on WordPress that ANOM was a "scam" and that a device he had tested was "in constant contact with" Google servers and relayed data to non-secure servers in Australia and the United States.

"I was quite concerned to see the amount of IP addresses relating to many corporations within the 5 eyes Governments (Australia, USA, Canada, UK, NZ who share information with one another)," the post said before it was deleted.

UK's BT starts trials of new hollow-core optical fibre networks


I used to work in a village just outside Birmingham. BT said that they would run FTTC if there was more than 100 people would express an interest in that product.

It took us 2 days and the local phone book to get 200 people signed up.


High-frequency trading

If there is an advantage to hollow fibers HFT companies will be the first to move

Former IT manager from Essex pleads guilty to defrauding the NHS of £800k


VAT non payment

I would have thought that not paying HMRC the difference between input and output VAT would come under defrauding HMRC and not the NHS

Seeking an escape from the UK? Regulations aimed at rocket and satellite launches from 2022 have arrived


Relevant Tom Scott video


The Home Office will need to overturn a long legacy of failure to achieve ambition of all-digital border by 2025


If it is fully digital

does that means that the immigration officers will be counting on their fingers

Oops, says Manchester City Council after thousands of number plates exposed in parking ticket spreadsheet


Re: Swiss number plates

It is also possible to own two (or more) vehicles that share the vehicle license number plates: the plates are physically unmounted from one vehicle and mounted on another, provided the vehicles in question are owned by the same owner of the vehicle license number plate. These plates are known locally as "Wechselschilder".

NHS-backed org reacted to GitHub leak disclosure with legal threats and police call, complains IT pro


I think the answer to the question "whose money" is our money, via the Dept of Health

RIP Spencer Silver: Inventor of the Post-it Note, aka the office password reminder, dies


Re: RIP Spencer

Did they record the passwords on the monitor bezels with a Dremel? The IT department that I used to work at caused mass confusion by swapping the monitors over one weekend.

So many calls on Monday from users saying that their accounts had been locked, but they were sure that they were using the correct password.

Stale and past its best. Are you talking about Windows or the pizza you're waiting for?


Pizza toppings

anchovies ftw

The Wight stuff: Marconi and the island, when working remotely on wireless comms meant something very different


The First Ever Wireless Hack: Marconi vs Maskelyne


File this next to Mars bars under 'things that should not be deep-fried': Marks & Spencer's Colin the Caterpillar


The scientists were so preoccupied with whether they could

they didn't stop to think if they should.



Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2022