If we're going for a female Doctor, don't pussy about, get Katie Beckinsale in full on Selene mode...
Posts by Steve Dulieu
49 publicly visible posts • joined 2 Aug 2007
Who do you want to be Who? VOTE for the BBC's next Time Lord
Entire Reg readership would fill 205 Olympic-sized swimming pools
Carbon fiber MacBooks to appear soon?
El Reg probes pregnant Playmobil lass
Are you sure he's still in Blighty?
Given that *someone* is driving a one ton nuclear laser tank down to ET's Bar 'n' Grill on Mars right about now, are you sure him and a mate aren't doing a bit of moon(Mars?)lighting for NASA at the moment?
Titanic director James Cameron prepares for deep sea dive
Fire burns away the Kindle dream of interactivity
To those saying that the cheapest kindle doesn't have a keyboard, err, yes it does. It's shown on the page for the new kindle on Amazon UK. Admittedly navigating a keyboard using up/down/left/right/enter is going to be a pain in the arse, but it does have a keyboard. Second button from the left calls and dismisses the keyboard, centre d-pad to select letters.
Japanese erections named 'Bollox', 'Wonder Device'
UK gov 'Spads' hefty salaries released/buried
Latest boffinry: Feeding TNT to sheep
New standard required?
Presumably, the old maximum velocity of a sheep in a vacuum was based on a sheep propelled by unaugmented methane fuelled bio-rocketry. This new TNT/Methane hybrid propulsion system requires immediate research involving fag packets, backs of envelopes and unfeasibly large amounts of beer to confirm that the standard remains constant.
Apple tosses Sony iBooks rival from iTunes
Our PARIS becomes GLOBAL MEDIA SENSATION
Call of Duty: Black Ops
Good clowns battle evil at the 'Carnival of Screams'
Apple files chip block stack patent
New 3D displays use falling water drops as 'voxels'
...exactly just how off your face do you and chums need to be to come out with something like <Neil from the young ones> Hey guys, what if we could, like, make the headlights shine *between* the raindrops?</Neil from the young ones> and instead of setting SPG on you, your chums say <Mike the cool person> Great idea, we can't fail to make money, let's get to it. </Mike the cool person>?
2012 Olympic mascots cop a shoeing
Good grief, the best part of 100 comments and no-one has mentioned the obvious, "Wenlock" now where have I heard that name before? Oh yes, the defunct brewery in East London, 'round about where they're building the Olympic park. One of the mascots celebrates the distruction of jobs and a reduction in the choice of beer! G*ts.
World's mightiest supercomputer to design new nuke plants
Chronos EZ430: An SDK packing watch for real techies
Teledildontic Circle Jerk Anyone?
So a wireless programable device capable of reading rapid wrist movments and transmiting them to a computer? Which via the internet could talk to other computers that are themselve's talking to other wrist mounted motion sensors? 15 comments in and I'm the first to think of the teledildontic possiblities of this peice of kit? My fellow commentards, you're slipping...
Got to be Paris, everyone gather round, open channel "C"...
Software update spikes certain Freesat set-top boxes
iPhone voted UK's 'coolest brand'
Vulture Central plans Brit-Yank dictionary
Here's another one...
In the UK pickle is what a 'Merkin would call relish, not a green abomination lurking in a jar with it's chums at the back of a chippie.
What a 'Merkin would call a pickle, a Brit would call a gurkin.
Once saw this cause a truly splendid culture clash in the Highgate Wertherspoons when a chap from the left hand side of the pond didn't get quite what he was expecting with his ploughman's lunch.
Boeing to build prototype pulsed-microwave robomissile
ToysRus unleashes Devil's Whore on innocent kiddies
Never mind about ToysRus...
What about El Reg's new TD2YDT* tech? I refer, of course to the Bravissimo ads that have started appearing on any remotely Bulgarian AB related story. There am I working up a rightious head of steam over illicit plod HD sizeure and up at the top of the page - NORBERTS!!! - <Homer> Mmmmmm, Norberts...</Homer> Keep it up, it's the geek dreamtime, IT and large breasted ladies with their shirts off. So one hand for pizza, one for the mouse, one for the...damm!
*T*ts Direct To Your DeskTop
US prosecutor orders Craigslist 'erotic listings' shutdown
Google boffins unveil 'What's Up?' CAPTCHA
Grey squirrels invade Nutt house
iPhone 3.0 beta reveals mixed blessing
Gadget-buying Taliban 5th column in Blighty - shock!
NASA talks little green men with Vatican
Blu-ray backers highlight rising demand
M42 closed by marshmallows and beer
Lightning to thunder with speed-creep beating V8 roar
NASA: Google Gulfstreams not science experiments
Virgin Media network downed by scouse power outage
Putin's dog gets satnav tracker collar
i-Mate has no friends
HMV lines up a few VAT-free CDs and DVDs
RAF strafes Next in pirated duvet copyright rumpus
Google Translate speaks in (more) tongues
Botanist sues to stop CERN hurling Earth into parallel universe
US.gov disappears European-owned Cuba websites
Activision and Vivendi Games merge into Activision Blizzard
Truphone phones a friend
Will bird flu stuff our Happy Christmas?
On the cooking of the wiley sprout...
You will need;
A red onion
Two cloves of garlic
Some fresh chillies
A jar of Sharwoods sweet chilli stir fry sauce.
Take the sprouts and par boil 'em.
Chop the onion and chillies and roughly crush the garlic.
Heat the oil in a wok, then add all the ingredents and stir fry until done.
Place loo roll in freezer for use the following day.
SWMBO and I call it "Sprout Diablo" althought the original inspriation came from "Sprout Mexicane" as featured on "Bottom".
'PlayStation-deprived' teen admits part in plot to pop parents
Record labels to ditch CD singles for USB Flash drives
But what if they're playing the long game
If I were a forward thinking pigopolist, what I'd do is, at the start, release the music in a non-drm lossless format, of a quality *greater* than is currently available on CD *or* vinyl but for a similar price. Sit back and bask in the reflected glow of astonished but greatful punters for, ooh say about the 36 months that will be required for market penatration to be total with USB playback devices (USB-PD) (both windows and mac based) and the complete distruction of the CD and vinyl markets. Then announce that dispite thier mumnificence and thier trust of the said punters not to rip them off, piracy remains as big a problem as it ever was and as of tomorrow all USB stick music would unfortunately have to be DRM'ed up to the gills but would ship with a *free* copy of the required software on every stick to enable playback on said USB-PDs. Of course, those of us who are savvy to this sort of fuckery will squeal like Paris at the opening of a shoe shop, but yer person on the Clapham omnibus? Probably just shrug and pony up the dough...