Posts by herman

The choice: Pay BT megabucks, or do something a bit illegal. OK, that’s no choice

Procurement? Surely Pringles are not that expensive?

Re: Similar language problem on Windows 1 0

The story of my life. I am Canadian, bought an Apple Macbook in Arabia (where I lived for ten years), registered it in Canada and now I live in Slovakia. Getting some web sites to open English is impossible and I cannot even use the Apple online store either.

Philips recalls 340 MRI machines because they may explode in an emergency

As luck may have it

I had a MRI with a Philips machine last year…

You don't get what you don't pay for, but nobody is paid enough to be abused

Re: "Actually, this is precisely the service you paid for"

Just do an upvote immediately. That will reverse it.

No, no, no! Disco joke hit bum note in the rehab center

Pink Floyd

Time, would be a good ring tone to torture people with. It starts with a big old Westclocks ticking and ringing.

Bank's datacenter died after travelling back in time to 1970

Re: Yearly tasks....

I used to set my watch by the BOOM!!! of the Noon Gun on Signal Hill.

BOFH: Just because we've had record revenues doesn't mean you get a Xmas bonus

Mythical bonus

The mythical bonus is what happens when one myth usurps Mythra’s birthday for another.

'Wobbly spacetime' is latest stab at unifying physics

Re: TBBT

Fractal symmetry.

UK immigration rules hit science just as it rejoins €100B Horizon program

Robot nurses

Where are the AI nurse robots?

Re: We are overdue an adult conversation about immigration

What happened to the industrial revolution? The UK needs to mechanize and stop indentured servitude.

Control Altman delete: OpenAI fires CEO, chairman quits

PEBKAC

Did Altman Abort, Retry, or Fail?

BOFH: Monitor mount moans end in Beancounter beatdown

Cost centre round robin

Ayup, that is where $500 toilet seats come from.

CompSci academic thought tech support was useless – until he needed it

A muse

We are not amused.

Re: Languages as fonts

Comic Sans is good for people with dyslexia.

Re: Depends.

I don’t know anyone that likes rap.

Europe bans Meta from using personal data to target ads

And nothing was lost

Behavioral ads likely don’t work nearly as well as claimed anyway.

BOFH: Adventures in overenthusiastic automation

Re: Good use

Blik Met Wiele.

Millions of smart meters will brick it when 2G and 3G turns off

Re: No corruption here.

I took Net Zero to mean Zero Net benefit to the consumer.

It is 2023 and Excel's reign of date terror might finally be at an end

Re: but if I enter 2+2 it can't work out

Sortof, Noah’s Abacus had only ten rows and columns.

Re: Optional

Next, MS will integrate ChatGPT into Excel and you will looove it!

Workload written by student made millions, ran on unsupported hardware, with zero maintenance

Re: Proof Of Concept Business

#define BLACK WHITE

Re: Proof Of Concept Business

Isn’t that what Doxygen is for?

BOFH: We've made a big mesh, Boss. That's what you wanted, right?

Re: I read that as

Didn’t Kwasi used to work at Barings Bank?

You've just spent $400 on a baby monitor. Now you need a subscription

Re: "the sudden imposition of subscription fees"

Smart heating is only useful if your home insulation is so bad that switching it off in some rooms will make a difference.

Nuclear-powered datacenters: What could go wrong?

Small nukes

Slovakia wants to replace its last three old coal fired plants with three small nukes.

BMW deems drivers worthy of warmth, ends heated car seat subscription

Re: connected services as a strategic imperative and a driver of future revenue

Back in the dey, the Deluxe models had two tone paint and a curtesy light. A/C was a triangle window that you could angle forward to get a blast of hot desert air to cool you down with.

BOFH: Cough up half a grand and we'll protect you from AI

Re: Useful for staging accidents

Sounds like you are the life of a party…

Re: Quite ironic

Not to forget that a GPS will send the ambulance to the wrong side of the mountain, because that road is horizontally through the mountain closer to you.

BOFH: Zen and the art of battery replacement

Re: Interestingly

Must be a big and clumsy cat to knock a lappy off a table.

Bad software destroyed my doctor's memory

Yup - Divide and conquer.

Re: "radically alter the workflow of medical professionals, without their input"

Wordprocessor - new??? In the beginning there was ed. Adam used ed on his abacus to write love letters to Eve.

Stolen Microsoft key may have opened up a lot more than US govt email inboxes

Re: RSA

You got me at Steve Balmer. His dance moves still haunt me.

Two US Navy sailors charged with giving Chinese spies secret military info

Re: Does the US pay that badly?

The Chinese carrier is a Russian design.

NASA 'quiet' supersonic jet is nearly ready for flight

Re: less-noisy maybe but still un-sound

The 747 was developed to be a military freighter. When they did not get mil orders it became a civil passenger jet.

Dialup-era developer writes ChatGPT client for Windows 3.1

Re: Your scientists were so preoccupied with whether they could...

Science fiction indeed.

Re: Next on the agenda: ClippyGPT, because why not?

It looks like you have an anger management problem. Would you like help with that?

BOFH: Good news, everyone – we're in the sausage business

Re: gigaspandrels

I think gigaspandels is the unit of measure for lady's yoga pants.

Ugh...

This reminds me of the guy in Penticton who picked up ladies of negotiable morals in Vancouver and then rendered them into pork sausages on his farm. When he was eventually jailed, he did not last long - someone bumped him off real quick.

Fed up with slammed servers, IT replaced iTunes backups with a cow of a file

COW

Well, that is what you get with Copy On Write storage.

That old box of tech junk you should probably throw out saves a warehouse

Golden Junque

My Junque Bochs has saved the day on numerous occasions. The only problem is that it takes up a good part of my office and actually finding what I know is there amongst the spiders and snakes is hard.

G7 nations admit they're nowhere on AI regulation

Red tape

This is all about Microsoft using gov red tape to hamstring the competition.

Elon Musk finally finds 'someone foolish enough to take the job' of Twitter CEO

Titter in Chief

I’ve been wondering about that titter joke.

BOFH: Ah. Company-branded merch. So much better than a bonus

Re: Acronym-Ignorant

WTCLOI is just another FLM.

Cisco: Don't use 'blind spot' – and do use 'feed two birds with one scone'

Re: Afrikkan or European ..

If they can swallow it.

Google Cloud's watery Parisian outage enters third week, with no end in sight

Yumky

Pardon me, but I’m not going to share a scone with a bird.

BOFH takes a visit to retro computing land

Well, a ZX81 wasn’t any real use then either, but it was what we could get.

Support chap put PC into 'drying mode' and users believed it was real

Re: Nipples and sonic screwdrivers

A little bit of practice will do wonders!

OpenMandriva Rome version 23.03 is out now

PCLOS

I’m running PCLOS on an Intel NUC. It is pretty good, quite slick and best of all, Poeteringfree.

We've got plenty of AI now but who asked for it? El Reg's vultures chime in

Good for fiction writing

ChatGPT is good for writing things where truth is optional, such as economics, political speeches and bed-time stories.

Cosmic rays more likely to glitch out water-cooled computers

Re: Hmm

AFAIK the neutrons come from a gamma ray hitting air, causing a neutron storm.