* Posts by Mutton Jeff

163 publicly visible posts • joined 29 Jun 2015


That 'Trump lawyers threaten teen over kitten website' yarn is Fakey Fakey McFake Fakeface

Mutton Jeff

Just claws?

I reckon

Hutch's Three UK users ripping through over 6GB a month

Mutton Jeff

nice to know I'm above average

for once in my life.

FYI anyone who codes outside work: GitHub has a contract to stop bosses snatching it all

Mutton Jeff

Does that mean...

they also own the Ikea wardrobe I assembled the other day?

Nielsen, eat your heart out: TiVo woos admen with prediction engine

Mutton Jeff

Re: Really

yeah, but must've 'ad PPI and that snow leopard a'int gonna sponsor itself now, is it?

Your future boss? An employee-interrogating bot – it's an open-source gift from Dropbox

Mutton Jeff

Would you like some toast?

How about a muffin?

Howdy doodly doo

Vinyl, filofaxes – why not us too, pleads Nokia

Mutton Jeff

all well and good

But I'd want a pair of sims on the same number, to avoid the fat finger fumble faff of moving between fonez.

Trump signs 'no privacy for non-Americans' order – what does that mean for rest of us?

Mutton Jeff

Re: Trump has become more deranged

We're Donald Ducked, for sure.

Trio charged with $4m insider trading by hacking merger lawyers

Mutton Jeff

Picked up by the exchange's market surveilance system

"Front running" (IIRC from when I worked on such a thing (front end))

Virgin America mid-flight panic after moron sets phone Wi-Fi hotspot to 'Samsung Galaxy Note 7'

Mutton Jeff


Non-existent sex robots already burning holes in men’s pockets

Mutton Jeff

Rise of the sexbots?

Fnarr fnarr!


Mutton Jeff

Well above the earth's crust...

If only our British 4G were as good as, um, Albania's... UK.gov's telco tech report

Mutton Jeff

Sort out 3g first

Expedia support tech raided his CFO to rack up insider trades

Mutton Jeff

Re: Curious

Highly leveraged spread bets, probably.

HBO slaps takedown demand on 13-year-old girl's painting because it used 'Winter is coming'

Mutton Jeff

Re: Winter is coming.

"Spring is in the air" anyone got that phrase, should I worry.

What if the kid never watched the telly prog?

Everything at Apple Watch is awesome, insists Tim Cook

Mutton Jeff

Re: 30 per cent of smartwatches go unused after purchase

You are Danny Dyer and I claim my £5

UK National Lottery data breach: Fingers crossed – it might not be you

Mutton Jeff

Re: Credit where it's due

they may be knights of the round table, but are they able?

Vegans furious as Bank of England admits ‘trace’ of animal fat in £5 notes

Mutton Jeff

To many nuggets!

Investigatory Powers Act signed into UK law by Queen

Mutton Jeff

Re: Here's the full list...

Could be worse.

At least the thugs at the 'Egg Marketing Board' are no longer privy to our browsing habits.

Adblock again beats publishers' Adblock-blocking attempts

Mutton Jeff

Not to mention those Ad arbitrage click-bait flinging scum

"You won't believe what $non-celeb from $crappy-tv-prog looks like now" - block!

OVH's northern customers offered steamy southern summer holiday

Mutton Jeff

Re: I like em

Mange tout Rodney, £2.03 a month for a nice little Centos box.

Loyalty card? Really? Why data-slurping store cards need a reboot

Mutton Jeff

Tax man's dream

Moet and foie gras every week, sir? On your declared income of £5 a week?

Black Friday: Cashback site Quidco goes TITSUP* on payday

Mutton Jeff

Oh the humanity

What am us to do?

No super-kinky web smut please, we're British

Mutton Jeff

Re: Yep, that'll work

don't understand why they're getting so anal about it....

Emulating x86: Microsoft builds granny flat into Windows 10

Mutton Jeff

Re: This is probably...

well as long as they make them snappy...

User needed 40-minute lesson in turning it off and turning it on again

Mutton Jeff

Where's the "Any" key?

My keyboard doesn't have one!

Nostradamus, what do you see in 2017?

Mutton Jeff

Cars will run on gravy

Salmon will live in trees and eat pencils.

President trump will initiate a free, at point of use, healthcare system for all.

British politicians sign off on surveillance law, now it's over to the Queen

Mutton Jeff

Re: Sense of proportion

... will be fitted up with something.

Google's neural network learns to translate languages it hasn't been trained on

Mutton Jeff

My nipples explode with delight

have an XKCD https://xkcd.com/902/

KCL staff offered emotional support, clergy chat to help get over data loss

Mutton Jeff

Pray? Or prey

nothing fails like prayer, as they say

Brace yourselves! Blighty is turning to AI for help

Mutton Jeff

Al Jarreau, obvs

Married man arrives at A&E with wedding ring stuck on todger

Mutton Jeff

Re: A wedding ring...

Thumbs up what?

The sharks of AI will attack expensive and scarce workers faster than they eat drivers

Mutton Jeff

Block wars?

Sounds like the beginnings of Mega City 1

Tesco Bank limits online transactions after fraud hits thousands

Mutton Jeff

Ghost of RBS?

I wonder, if they still use RBS tech, ok it was a long time ago and all.

No nudes, bloated apps, Android sucks and 497 other complaints about Apple to the FTC

Mutton Jeff

You wanna complain?!?!?

I've only had these shoes 3 weeks.

And me back 'urts1

EU announces common corporate tax plan

Mutton Jeff

Re: Benefit for both?

Indeed, this may have swung our vote the other way.

Topless in-car selfie attempt climaxes with rear-end bonking

Mutton Jeff


She's a very naughty girl

Will AI spell the end of humanity? The tech industry wants you to think so

Mutton Jeff

Wont they learn from the future?


Graduate recruitment site exposed 50,000 CVs sent to Virgin Media UK

Mutton Jeff

Tight fekkers

Not even a years sub !

Accountant falls for sexy Nigerian email scammer, gives her £150k he cheated out of pal

Mutton Jeff

Re: Half of me wants to

That was my first thought, Alzheimers ?

Lessons from the Mini: Before revamping or rebooting anything, please read this

Mutton Jeff

Re: Are you saying the mini revamp was a success?

As an owner of both (differing times):

The Mini - ****ing awful

Das Mini - ****ing brilliant!

Glued-shut IT wallets hindered UK govt's programmes – study

Mutton Jeff

As soon as £££.gov involved

the quotation gets multiplied by 1,000

This speech recognition code is 'just as good' as a pro transcriber

Mutton Jeff

I bet...

my hovercraft is still full of eels!

Basic income after automation? That’s not how capitalism works

Mutton Jeff

Re: It's True...

I so want one a those!

Mutton Jeff

Bring on the automated commentard system

Bring on the automated commentard system!

RBS debit card payments have gone utterly TITSUP

Mutton Jeff



Mercedes answers autonomous car moral dilemma: Yeah, we'll just run over pedestrians

Mutton Jeff

Not good PR

"Car kills occupant(s)"

It's one thing if a driver swerves, but the car doing it automatically....

Pound falling, Marmite off the shelves – what the UK needs right now is ... an AI ethics board

Mutton Jeff

If Bees make honey...

Do wasps make Marmite?

(mustard mit, I luvs the stuff)

Google may just have silently snuffed the tablet computer

Mutton Jeff

Re: I don't remember this weekend

Luxury, I remember when stone henge was built, you paid a lot of sheep/goats/shrunken heads per Megalith in those days.

Complaints against cops down 93% thanks to bodycams – study

Mutton Jeff

Pics or it didn't happen

New defence lawyer tactic.

Dublin shopkeeper catches forecourt fouler with his pants down

Mutton Jeff

Re: Er ...

Doubt there'll be any return value.