* Posts by thomas k

267 publicly visible posts • joined 11 Jun 2015


Bloke cuffed after 'You deserve a seizure' GIF tweet gave epileptic a fit

thomas k

Re: before the internet

They beat me up and stole my lunch money at recess.

Dark matter drought hits older galaxies: Boffins are, rightly, baffled

thomas k

So,Tesla was right after all?

"Today's scientists have substituted mathematics for experiments, and they wander off through equation after equation, and eventually build a structure which has no relation to reality."

Smart sex toys firm coughs up $3.75m in privacy lawsuit

thomas k

"Don't speak."

Why would we want sex toys smarter than our usual live fare?

Lawyer defending arson suspect flees court with pants on fire

thomas k

My favourite Mr Boffo strip

Mr Boffo is sitting next to some guy in Hell who's musing aloud, "liar, liar, pants on fire ... now it all makes sense!"

Smut-scamming copyright chaser 'fesses up, will do hard time

thomas k

smoke and mirrors

Just something to distract us from the fact that lawyers write the laws they then take advantage of to screw the rest of us and to give the illusion that they do police themselves because not even lawyers are above the law.

BONG! Lasers crack Big Ben frequency riddle BONG! No idea what to do with this info BONG!

thomas k

...or something far more sinister?

Aaaaaand... cue the over-sensationalized 60 minute History Channel "investigation" featuring that exact phrase "...or something far more sinister?", creepy lighting and music and snippets of historical recreations in which badly-costumed actors run across a field to, in this case, carry hods of bricks up spindly wooden scaffolding to build a tower.

Radioactive leak riddle: Now Team America sniffs Europe's skies for iodine isotope source

thomas k

...should probably get checked out.

After having fashioned an appropriate costume to preserve their anonymity, of course.

Android Wear: The bloatware that turned into gloatware

thomas k

I love my LG G Watch

I only use it *as* a watch, though (and only at night, as you can't read it in daylight). It looks great - black and mysterious, like the monolith from 2001 - and the ability to change the face is the main reason I bought it. It's also much easier to use it as a timer than fiddling with the buttons on a digital watch.

Trump decides Breitbart chair Bannon knows more about natsec than actual professionals

thomas k

"custom-built minipen"!?

He could easily an off-the-shelf Kaweco Sport (~$25) un-capped or, if he wants something more luxurious, a diminutive Pelikan M320 in marbled orange (to match his complexion).

NASA fires first shot in plan to bring a chunk of asteroid down to Earth

thomas k

In the movies, this never ends well

Just sayin'.

AI and robots? Will someone think of the jobs, says HPE CEO Whitman

thomas k

If robots take all the jobs ...

... there won't be anyone for Meg to fire.

The wait is over ... Nokia's BACK!

thomas k
Thumb Up

Welcome back!

I hope they can make a go of it. My trusty old N900 is still plugging away, keeping me entertained at work with lovely classical music in stereo 5 nights a week, still on the original battery, too.

Sexbots could ‘over-exert’ their human lovers, academic warns

thomas k


I'm likely to over-exert myself just watching videos.

Wearable eats wearable: Fitbit 'to buy Pebble' with a steal of a deal

thomas k

Re: OH dear

According to the article, Pebble did a good job of doing that themselves.

USS Zumwalt gets Panama tug job after yet another breakdown

thomas k

"causing some cosmetic damage"

To the ship or the canal?

Reg man 0: Japanese electronic toilet 1

thomas k

"Not to worry, thought I."

Famous last words.

thomas k

Re: In Japan, males sit to urinate

Wait, doesn't everyone sit? Well, maybe when not at home.

AI is all trendy and fun – but it's still a long way from true intelligence, Facebook boffins admit

thomas k

"To be fair, the same goes for many humans, too"

That was my first thought when I read the headline.

Silicon Valley VCs: We're gonna make California great again – on its own

thomas k

Re: patterns in the ceiling

But there *are* patterns in the ceiling, bro.

Capita's head of tech solutions resigns

thomas k


Must've been part of the problem then.

Dynamic IP addresses are your personal property, CJEU rules

thomas k
Thumb Up


+1 for the pic.

Aussie Aussie Aussie, oi oi oi you, you're fired: Apple sacks staff secretly snapping shoppers

thomas k


= iFired

British jobs for British people: UK tech rejects PM May’s nativist hiring agenda

thomas k

British jobs for British people

I've seen that movie. P D James book, Clive Owens ...

Windows 10 market share fell in September

thomas k

Don't blame me

I bought a new Windows 10 PC on Friday, the 30th.

Meh, it works.

Judge makes minor tweaks to sex ban IT man's order

thomas k
Thumb Up

I see what you did there

Placed right beside "Pull the plug!"

Anti-ICANN Cruzade continues: Senator Ted still desperately trying to defund US govt

thomas k

Hey, Ted!

Take off, eh?

Daddy, what's 'P2P file sharing'?

thomas k


Young people just discovering this? Get with the times, kids.

thomas k

Yoof, eh?

Young people just discovering this? Get with the times, kids.

HP Ink buys Samsung's printer business for a BILLION dollars

thomas k

HP admitting their own printer are shit?

How long before Samsung printers become just as bad?

CIA-backed big data firm Palantir says secrets pinched by investor

thomas k

Chickens, roost?

Or pot, kettle, black?

Extra Bacon? Yes please, even though the Cisco bug of this name is bad for you

thomas k

Yes, please!

Oh, I thought you meant Kevin. Um, never mind.

North Korea unveils its home-grown Netflix rival – Manbang

thomas k


Why didn't Craig's List think of that?!

If this headline was a security warning, 90% of you would ignore it

thomas k

I'm sorry ...

Did you say something?

Nobody expects... a surprise haemorrhoid operation

thomas k

Not fun, and then ...

Well, I hope they gave the poor chap more than a few days supply of acetaminophen plus codeine and, when he ran out and asked for more, they didn't tell him to just take Tylenol.

If it was the doctor who had that operation, they'd prescribe themselves a couple months of an oxy.

Crocodile well-done-dee: Downed Down Under chap roasted by exploding iPhone

thomas k


Another reason to use a holster style case.

Yahoo! She said yes. Verizon confirms $4.8bn acquisition

thomas k

Thank my lucky stars!

That I'm no longer a Verizon customer and will avoid the coming price increase to pay for this.

Silicon Valley's contribution to the US Republican Convention: Gayness

thomas k

re: psychopath test

You mean, to see if he meets the minimum requirements for party membership?

Apple, Facebook and Coinbase coughed data to finger alleged pirate king

thomas k

"suspect caught when he bought something on iTunes"

And they say irony is dead.

Baidu tech chief: AI smart enough to take our jobs, not our lives. Yet

thomas k

tedium of work or idleness

Hmm ... well, I know which I'd take.

Lone hacker claims to have broken into US Democrat servers

thomas k

Re: Dirty tactics?

By that logic it could just as easily have been the Dems that released it, to give themselves cover - "oh, these were internal documents for our own use, we would never have released any of this to the public, no, no, no".

Ericsson set to lay off thousands of workers over summer – report

thomas k

Re: Ericcson

Why, I believe you're right. My bad, late night at work.

thomas k


They spent all that MS money already? Should've put some away for a rainy day.

Now Google backs everyone's favorite trade pact: The TPP

thomas k

Re: voting 3rd party

Voting 3rd party is the way to insure the two entrenched parties stay entrenched.

McDonald's says bigger fonts cooked up improved profits

thomas k


If they offered the McRib year-round, I'd eat there year-round.

Marauding monkey blacks out Kenya

thomas k

In a startling reversal of roles ...

monkey spanks man.

Software snafu let EU citizens get referendum vote, says Electoral Commission

thomas k

If they saw "men who live as dogs" in the Graun ...

In case you missed it (warning, not for the faint of heart) -


King Tut's iron dagger of extraterrestrial origin

thomas k

I'm not saying it was aliens ...

but let's ask Giorgio.

Microsoft's Windows Phone folly costs it another billion dollars

thomas k

Figures ...

Bought a 520 in 2014, then added an LG on a different carrier. I don't use a telephone a lot and just last week cancelled the LG carrier so the 520 will be my only phone.

US government publishes drone best practices

thomas k

Best practices

When you see their eyes start to glaze over, stop talking.

Bold stance: Microsoft says terrorism is bad

thomas k

Bad for whom?

It's certainly been a god-send for our governments, who get to use it as an excuse to strip us our basic democratic rights.