Posts by Oz

UK polling stations turn away 'hundreds' of voters

Re: Huh?

They did - just so did lots of other people, hence the 3 hour queues!

(The Welcome mat - because they weren't!)

Mobe-wielding drivers getting away with it

Boss?

You boss is a c*ck, and you should tell him so. Our company edict is that you take a call when it is safe to do so. If there's a lay-by you can scoot into then fine. Otherwise leave it and call them back - most numbers log on the phone after all

Megan Fox not world's sexiest woman: Official

Re: Look deeper, America

Aye, she is hot, and she is a bit feisty. I fancy that! ;-)

Met terror squad beats all complaints

Met terror squad beats all complaints

I smell bullshit, and plenty of it. It's obviously not worth complaining about the Terror Squad as 1) they'll cover it up and 2) they'll bust your ass over some made up offense.

Makes you proud to be British!

Scammers plunder gullible iPad owners' backdoors

Joke Alert

Damn - you beat me to it! I suppose I could have added:

"Scammers plunder gullible iPad owners' backdoors" - it wouldn't be the first time!

Sky punts 'truly unlimited' 20Mb/s broadband

20Mb? How?

The Unlimited package is only £7.50 as a promo I believe, and as many others posters have already stated, 20Mb is great if you can get it. I get 4Mb tops - consistently.

Downloads capped

The Fail is you, my friend. Sky offers two packages, one capped and one unlimited - read the article again!

Police send Reg hack CRB check database

Titles suck!

I should f**king think El Reg declined as well! Gwent Police are taking the p*ss with that one! For extra ha-ha's, release the name of the person(s) who asked you not to publish!

El Reg PARIS team unboxes some toys

Beer

I've earned a shandy, by coming close to the FlyCamOne route, but will keep quiet for those partaking in this geographical drinking game!

Beertime?

Do I earn a beer saying it's the Avila to Puerto de Castilla road?

(Paris, cos she's as clueless as me!)

Volcanic Eyjafjallajökull dirt-splurt space snap

Re Travel

The flights allowed were (at the time of writing) only local/internal flights. The article states that flights into and out of England were halted, so El Reg is correct.

Wii Fit fall woman turns into nympho

Highly sexed

"Seriously my girlfriend is highly sexed, minimum is once a day, and twice is more normal, if i was at home I dont think she would ever stop!"

I take it you work 7 days a week, every week? Or too scared to go back for more?!?!!?

Jobsian email axes early-iPhone support

Re: Well come on

Er, perhaps by adding new features that people want?

Guy Kewney dies at 63

Will be sadly missed

Guy was an excellent journalist who will be sadly missed. Like many others have said here it was PCW that kept my early interest in IT, but even in the last few years I was always fascinated hearing him talk about IT issues on BBC News. My sincerest condolences to his wife and daughters.

Murdoch tells old media to 'stand up' to Google, Bing

Simpsons-esque

As Comic Book Guy so eloquently put it, "Farewell dinosaur!"

Segway + motorbike = futuristic dorkmobile

Completing the list

"1. Buy Taurus

2. Flat Battery

3. Head injury

4. ???

5. Profit!"

6. Class law suit

7. Bankruptcy

Legless Lithuanian attacks copper with todger

= Not needed

I'd just like to say "what a knob"!

Body of James Brown disappears from family tomb

Papa needs a brand new body bag

Enough already! My keyboard was already in a bad way, and that's now finished it. Half a mouthful of tea goes a fair way when it explodes out of your mouth. I hope you're happy! ;-)

Hull Daily Mail pulls porncoder comments

Snail mail?

Now that the internet method of commenting is closed at the HDM, can I assume that more traditional methods of supplying feedback will now be employed? Dog turd in a jiffy bag anyone?

Hordes of new threats ahead for mobile networks

"eff up your ess"

I prefer the vernacular "f you in the a" but it made me chuckle all the same!

Street View dismisses German privacy fears

The title is required, and must contain letters and/or digits - Why? I'm replying to a post!

"You just get the same view as you would if you walked there yourself."

But clearly you don't. The cameras are mounted on a pole on the top of cars - 9 to 10 foot up. a 6 foot fence is normally good enough to provide some privacy, but not where these cameras are concerned. Think about it - most people would think about calling the police if they found someone on a stepladder taking pictures over a garden fence. I know I would. Why is Google special?

Scots unleash world's strongest beer

What's a title?

Ironically, I was recommended the Punk IPA and it was absolutely rank. I'm a real ale fan, and I brew my own, so I have a fair appreciation for a decent beer, so I can only assume it's brewed with a target audience of lager drinkers. I do like the slogan on the side of the bottle though: "if you don't like this beer then f**k off" or words to that effect!

Red Dwarf's Kryten exposes iPhone number

Epic fail

If you're going to remark on someone's bad spelling, at least make sure you spell the word (in)correctly! Otherwise you just look a complete ass. No wonder you posted anonymously ;-)

'Clumsy' French cop tasers schoolkid

Gendarme

Most likely because the term military police would be equally misleading. Although the Gendarme are under military control, the function they perform is more like our policeman than the military cops.

Save DAB! Send FM radios to Africa

DAB Alarm Clock

I've got the Pure Siesta Flow. It's not cheap but gives AM, FM, DAB and Internet Radio. It has four alarms that you can set independently, to different stations on different sources, and at different volumes. The vanilla Siesta doesn't have the Internet radio feature, but in my opinion, is not so easy to use.

All the above said, I wouldn't change my unit for anything. It does what is says on the tin, properly.

No title is required as this is a reply

"My aged tranny lives in the bathroom and keeps on going."

Whatever floats your boat. I would have thought the bedroom would be more convenient for a "love-in" ;-)

Bloated Office 2010 kicks dirt in face of old computers

The title is required, and must contain letters and/or digits.

Are you sure your wife isn't a dude?

Wrists playing up? You're shagging too much

Sex tips

Why be so far away? Easy. Having a large weapon (or possibly a massive beergut)!

Google: Keep user data safe by letting us hoard it forever

Fleischer....

is a complete jerk. How many hackers will sit there attempting to crack something for 6 months. They won't. They'll most likeey stick with it a while and then bail out to try something/someone else. He reasoning is just more BS to try and convince the paranoid and less IT literate that he really needs all that information for a long time.

'Anti-cyberbullying' rapper sorry for SMS smack talk

Re: Apology?

And we all wait with baited breath for him to change his name to "DY" or some such inane b*l*x to try and continue his career (such as it is)... IMO he has proven himself very much the loser!

Mini-asteroid sneaks up on Earth

Re: WTF

Meteorites that a larger than the suggested 25 metres will not burn up in entirety. Therefore you will be left with a rock mass in the lower atmosphere and landing on the surface. Small meteorites on the ground suggest that the original incoming meteor would have been just a bit bigger than 25 metres. (OK, that's ignoring density and angle of flight, for starters, but the principle is correct)

U2 frontman bitchslapped by TalkTalk

Re: My first illegal MP3....

I note that it wasn't an album, therefore costing Bono 79p not £7.

Dare I suggest that most people find far better things to download now than U2 stuff. Really - Bono needs a reality check!

US feds squeeze bloggers for posting TSA orders

Paris....

With a surname like "Hards", I'd imagine you would!

Brum DJ canned for cutting short Her Maj

Queen's Speech

And while we are being pedantic, the Queen's Speech is delivered to Parliament when it re-opens for business. The Queen's Christmas message is delivered on the 25th December. I find both boring FWIW....

Micron takes wraps off 'fastest' desktop SSD

Just two questions

No doubt independent reviews will cover this in time, but what are the random read/write times, and what is the real-world failure rate.

Virginia corrections officers on 'dog fondling' rap

Greyhounds

I believe that greyhounds are regularly masturbated as it helps them perform better (on the track, that is). Why the others filmed it, is presumably down to the fact that they couldn't believe the bloke was actually doing it!

Star-watchers: Famous moon left half-smeared by dirty ring

Darkening of the Ring?

... And worst of all it appears to be contagious! Best keep an eye on mine just in case.

IE, Chrome, Safari duped by bogus PayPal SSL cert

@ Neal 5

"That's because a hacker on Monday published a counterfeit secure sockets layer certificate that exploits a gaping hole in a Microsoft library used by all three of those browsers"

Gaping hole in a MS library.... Mozilla have patched their browser, which presumably means it intercepts the call to the library and rejects it if necessary. Therefore I would suggest that it is a Microsoft issue after all. The other vendors could do the same, but it still won't resolve the underlying issue in the MS code.

Royal Mail lawyers demand closure of postcode lookup site

Only £1.6M

£1.6M doesn't seem very much when you think that a corporate licence costs £75K. I'm sure that RM could do better with a little more marketing....

Virgin Media network goes down down south

Re: All is well again

Wow - you're ok, so everyone else is a clown and lives in a cave! I was with NTL when I first moved to Southampton (hardly an isolated area) and they were truly crap. They couldn't provide a decent phone service and their internet offering was bloody unreliable. Worst of all was their customer service - dire, is the best way I can describe it... 2 hours in a queue FFS!

I dumped them and have never looked back. If you like VM then good for you - accept that others may not!

Intel crams four displays into one PC

Re Four times the screen means

"Four times the prawn!"

That's as maybe, but you're going to go even blinder yanking your crank to an image on that small a screen!

Riot police raid birthday barbecue for 'all-night' Facebook tag

£200 Helicopter

If you read up on this, you will find that the helicopter was on the way back from another incident, and so the only "on" cost was the extra fuel and pilot pay - making £200 more plausible.

Trading Standards calls for online knife sale ban

Get a grip!

Geez, whatever next. I tend to buy a lot of stuff online, including cookware and utensils, because frankly the shops near me have a pants selection of implements. Does it now need to be such that I can't buy a decent skinning or carving knife, just because kids *could* buy knives online.

FFS, they could just as easily nick one their parents' kitchen drawers, assuming the ferals that carry knives for protection actually have parents! ;-)

Safety wonks condemn digital TV satnav

@Softies By Anonymous Coward

"I am sick of the locks on my car locking themselves whenever the car is in motion to prevent me accidentally opening my door while in motion and falling out."

The auto-locking is not to stop you falling out - it's to stop you getting car-jacked, or your stuff being nicked off the back seat at traffic lights.

(P.S. Loving the new icons!)

Fox terminates The Sarah Connor Chronicles

@ Sarah Bee

He's got one right so stop being so picky and over-sensitive! Really!

Facebook eliminates parts of Wales

@ Graham Marsden / Tony Smith

Well said Tony! :-D

I'd rather be a Scummer than a Skate - sorry to burst your bubble Graham, lol :-p

Number 10 doubles as 'House of Flying Nokias'

@ laserJet3

" HP used to build great gear, but sadly the Laserjet3 wasn't one of those pieces.

It and most of the other Laserjets were rebadged Canon kit (most still are).

Still... if GB can push one around, he's stronger than he looks."

Don't be silly - he just put his weight behind it!

Tough on e-vehicles, tough on the causes of e-vehicles

Vehicles

* Do pause at that URL, and note the Department for Transport's ominous inability to spell "vehicles".

The URL has now been corrected, but not before the sloppiness has been well noted! ;-)

(Paris, cos I bet she knows all about sloppiness)

Tory 'terror' affair shows danger of ubiquitous surveillance

@G Murphy

Labour bashing is nothing if done by the other parties, right? However there are a large number of Labour MPs who have publicly stated that the actions taken were dubious, if not unlawful. I can't help thinking that it's not just the opposition who have actually opposed this behaviour, which rather devalues your argument

@ Jez Burns

Well done for typing that tome - I couldn't have put it better myself.

It's all the above cases of reasonableness, plus plenty of others, that ensures the average, and usually reasonable, person in the street has lost much of, or all, faith in the authorities.

I fear it's a bit late to reverse this trend as it's the same authorities, who rather than listen to these valid issues, bulldoze legislation that is completely pointless and unnecessary, and in the process turn us all into criminals. A police state indeed.