* Posts by Ken Moorhouse

3513 posts • joined 26 Jul 2007

AI eye-scanner can tell whether you'll croak it from a heart attack

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News just in...

Sainsburys are now giving a Croak Kit free with some packets of bananas.


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Re: I have rather high blood pressure even in the best of conditions

You have your own device for measuring blood pressure?

That is the only sure-fire method of guarding against "White Coat Syndrome".

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Can it tell me...

...if I will die late?

Microsoft warns: Windows 11 update breaks provisioning

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Microsoft warns: Windows 11 update breaks provisioning

In other news:

Man paints wall. Paint dries.

Boffins hunt and kill cockroaches with machine vision laser

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Re: I've never [intentionally] eaten insects before [that I know of].

I'm sure you've ingested cochineal dye.

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You wait till evolution kicks in...

Oh, I dunno, maybe cockroaches develop mirrors on their bodies so that anyone shining a laser at them gets zapped.

I will leave you with this...

Warning: contains upsetting scenes


Microsoft drops the C bomb on financial services – 'compliance'

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Windows giant know exactly how to get these types fired up: 'compliance'

Maybe best not to mention Excel though.

Elon Musk tells Twitter: My takeover deal is back on

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Re: Humans have, because it can be a way to get around profanity filtering.

LSE's website is a laugh when it comes to profanity filtering.

A good example is Babcock, the name of which cannot be mentioned in its chat forums, despite it being a household name. If anything, it draws attention to the offending word.


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Re: The 'war' is making Zelenski, his cronies and his handlers at the CIA/MIC a lot of money.

A rare downvote from me.

Do you really think that trashing your country is a good way to make money?

Yeah, I know, don't feed the trolls.

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Re: Then I guess if you were so inclined, you could us a couple of bot herds.

Careful if you have a tendency for spoonerisms.

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In other news...

Popcorn shares plummet.

Fake vibrating teeth could make great hearing aids

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I wonder if people who are fitted with these...

...would like to listen to drill music.

Will they say they hate oh hate all that percussion?

No? How about a bit of John Williams?


Fixing an upside-down USB plug: A case of supporting the insupportable

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Re: It was rumoured that local houses could light bulbs from the radiation.

Is that the reason why it was known as "the light programme"?

Post-Brexit 'science superpower' UK still hasn't appointed a science minister

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Re: Like fuck up the economy on an epic scale within days of taking office

Sir Kier would probably be more diplomatic... Roger and Out.

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Re: Akwasi Addo Alfred Kwarteng

This is the man who wrote a book entitled "Gridlock Nation".

How do you depict irony in an icon? Dunno, but can we have one please?

Microsoft says it's boosted phishing protection in Windows 11 22H2

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if they try to store their password locally

But to be able to do that, it has to store that checklist of passwords *somewhere*.

Two possibilities: either the passwords are stored locally, or remotely. Yes, they may be encrypted, but it is only a matter of time before that checklist is hacked.


I remember Rapport. Type a password on a pc and Rapport kindly flagged up that a sensitive combination of characters had been entered. Thanks, Rapport for the alert, now just got to find out the site that goes with that password..

So using Rapport as a tool, you didn't need to go on-line to run your exploits, you could do it safely offline, without triggering any alerts from the target site itself, claiming it is being attacked.

The years were worth the wait. JWST gives us an amazing view of Neptune's rings

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Re: it's one of those things that you put cheese into and turn a handle.

Better make sure it doesn't get too close to the moon then.

We don't want more moons than Neptune.

Update your Tesla now before the windows put your fingers in a pinch

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Re: software complexity issue... close to 0% risk

Trouble with software of this kind is that it is Real Time, which means multi-threaded, interrupt driven. Even without considering hardware failures. Then there is the stability of the ancillary memory too. Some would advocate bringing in multiple systems using voting techniques, but this can cause its own major complications.

One has to remember that the brain has been through thousands of years of testing. However, the ability of man to travel at greater speeds will not be factored into this testing regime for some considerable time. Who knows, future reflex actions might evolve that skirt the issue completely by inducing hyperventilation when travelling in a Tesla, or seeing one in motion (assuming that Tesla stay the passage of time).

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Re: how does an Essex girl put the lights out after sex?

You've got some explaining to do if her feet get stuck in the window.

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Re: The complexity of all this software...

Not sure of the current status, but when I was there London Transport did not trust software, even electronics, for signalling safety systems. Two examples:-

(1) Software commands given to change the route of a train were fed into a mechanical interlocking frame which dictated whether it was safe to allow it to happen. Random link: https://www.leadhillsrailway.co.uk/railway-locomotives/signalling-track/

(2) Timing relays (JR's in signal engineering terminology) were used extensively to allow situations to settle down before allowing certain circumstances to happen. For example, if it was desired to change the route of a train, a 120 second JR was activated which prevented any change for a minimum of two minutes to ensure the trains in the area were at rest, at which point occupied train detection could assess whether it was safe to reset the route and set it anew. Other JR periods were used for different purposes, all of which were seriously constrained to work to a Fail Safe philosophy. One of them was a 4.5 second JR. This was turned into a solid state version for the Victoria Line IIRC. The way it was implemented was very clever, using circuitry to construct a wave-form of appropriate frequency, then using the principle of resonance to pass the successful construction of the waveform to a switch (a band-pass filter), activating the completion of the 4.5 second delay period. The idea being that there is no way to cheat a resonant circuit that a condition had been met, when it hadn't.

This fanaticism for safety is something that car manufacturers need to take on board. It affects everyone, not just drivers, we are all road users, including pedestrians.

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Will Microsoft be threatening Tesla...

For stealing its ideas?

Japanese boffins build solar-powered, remote-controlled cyborg cockroach

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What is a mystery...

Is how it is possible for Kenjiro Fukuda to share his cockroach research with the world at large.

The secret to Sparrow, DeepMind's latest Q&A chatbot: Human feedback

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Re: But of course "size" is not the same thing as a measure of utility or performance.

Many websites have researched this...


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Will it be cheap?

Tesla Megapack battery ignites at substation after less than 6 months

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Re: Clearly you haven't been to Milton Keynes.

Which reminds me...


I reckon everyone in London got woken up by that.

Meta told to pay $175m to walkie-talkie techies for infringing IP

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Meta rogered by walkie-talkie techies for infringing IP

C'mon ElReg, you're slipping with the punchy headlines.

Over and Out.

Microsoft debuts Windows 11 2022 Update – now with features added monthly

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Re: RESTORE the basics!

IIRC each version of DOS had a different version of this utility, and they were incompatible with each other.

So be careful what you wish for.

Icon is where to keep a copy of DOSVER handy ---->

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Re: "We do this by leveraging the variety of update mechanisms"

It means we will use a crowbar to get it in your machine, if we have to.

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Light Bulb Moment...

I now know why they call it 365.

Nothing to do with uptime.

It's the number of updates per year.

(Can we have a light bulb icon?)

In Rust We Trust: Microsoft Azure CTO shuns C and C++

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Re: I remember when the next thing to revolutionize the world would be...

Nobody has yet said...

"Let's get back to basic[s]."

Interpret that how you will.

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Re: v3 a square with rounded corners - so close!

Have you seen those fancy Silverlight hub caps?

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Re: v3 a square with rounded corners - so close!

Beta testers were frustrated that the wheel hub positioning had been moved yet again.

El Reg commentards in particular were vocal in questioning whether bottom left hand corner of wheel arch was a very eccentric choice.

Ken Moorhouse Silver badge

...been developing its own cloud-oriented memory safe programming language called Project Verona.

I'm sure that somewhere they must have a Wheel Research & Development Lab.

Don't want to get run over by a Ford car? There's a Bluetooth app for that

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Re: Braking distance

I used to visit a friend in a residential area of North London. Quiet Sunday afternoons were often shattered by the sound of screeching brakes. She told me that the local driving instructors used to like doing emergency stops outside her flat. (And no, she wasn't parading naked in front of the windows).

Which reminds me, I was told by a customer who lives very close to it that the pedestrian crossing outside Agent Provocateur in Pont Street (Central London) is an accident hotspot.

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Re: Once the hackers get their teeth into this...

Watch out who's following you...


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Re: I think I hate the way the world is heading...

There's an app for that...

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Once the hackers get their teeth into this...

...there might be people out there being targeted for a nasty collision.

Microsoft rolls out stealthy updates for 365 Apps

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Re: Southern Rail timing - clearly they're using Windows

Thanks for that. Not going to be comfortable sitting in one of their trains now. Have you seen the number of buffer overflows there are?

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Re: Moreover a running PC can be hit by ongoing attacks - while a turned off one can't.

Though the pc can't be attacked if it is off, the same can not be said about your [cloud-based] documents.

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Time to dig out that utility...

...which constantly wiggles the mouse pointer to look as if someone's active at the keyboard.

That is of course, you don't want your session to be updated. (The vast majority, judging by previous episodes).

Rare hexagonal diamond formed by crash of dwarf planet and asteroid, scientists believe

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Does this mean there will be 5 C's now?

Carat, Colour, Clarity, Cut and Crystal structure.

Feds freeze $30m in cryptocurrency stolen from Axie Infinity

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The new way to implement...

Glue Destruction systems

Windows 11 update blocking some users from logging in

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Re: There are really an awful lot of things to complain about, but this isn't one of them

Arguably the thing to complain about is that none of this is officially documented.

It does not give confidence to end-users that IT people know what they are doing when different IT people recommend polar opposites of suggestions to solve their problems. Yes, things have been like this for many years, many versions, but there was generally some kind of official roadmap that could be consulted when making such decisions, but nowadays it is all about "some bloke on the internet tried this, and it worked."

Microsoft-employed software writers/maintainers need to remember that they are as much a part of the IT Community as the rest of us, and that, to be considered "professionals", we all need to sing from the same hymn book. At present, that ain't happening.

Rest in peace, Queen Elizabeth II – Britain's first high-tech monarch

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Re: PO also said they have been told not to pulp or otherwise "waste" the existing stick of stamps

In some countries it is felt perfectly acceptable to obliterate the portrait of the prior incumbent. Farouk of Egypt is the best-known example.

A virtual beer if you can come up with an example where King George VI had this treatment.

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Re: Now there is a weekend of pointlessly cancelled events

Tut tut.

So you're not happy that lots of strikes have been cancelled?

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Re: King Andrew in the hot seat

It doesn't work in what one would think is the logical order. He is #8 in line.

(From https://www.royal.uk/succession )

1. The Duke of Cambridge

2. Prince George of Cambridge

3. Princess Charlotte of Cambridge

4. Prince Louis of Cambridge

5. The Duke of Sussex

6. Master Archie Mountbatten-Windsor

7. Miss Lilibet Mountbatten-Windsor

8. The Duke of York

9. Princess Beatrice, Mrs. Edoardo Mapelli Mozzi

10. Miss Sienna Mapelli Mozzi

11. Princess Eugenie, Mrs. Jack Brooksbank

12. Master August Brooksbank

13. The Earl of Wessex

14. Viscount Severn

15. The Lady Louise Mountbatten-Windsor

16. The Princess Royal

17. Mr. Peter Phillips

18. Miss Savannah Phillips

19. Miss Isla Phillips

20. Mrs. Michael Tindall

21. Miss Mia Tindall

22. Miss Lena Tindall

23. Master Lucas Tindall

Ken Moorhouse Silver badge

Re: the majority of Australians may not be monarchists

One did have a try at it with the Hutt River Province.


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Re: the non-QR coded stamps need to be exchanged for stamps that have a QR code on them

This is true for Definitive (Machin) stamps. I believe Commemorative stamps will continue to be valid.

Private equity suits at Thoma Bravo pull out of Darktrace acquisition

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causing shares in the UK cybersecurity company to plummet.

Good time to get in there...



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