Posts by Shadow Systems

No, that Sunspot Solar Observatory didn't see aliens. It's far more grim

Re: Unconvinced

You don't shut down the entire facility to deal with one presumeably unarmed & unaware individual. You send in a max of four agents to apprehend him quietly in such a way that the other employees need not even know the take down was/had happened. The janitor won't be suspecting/expecting to be escorted from the property pinned in by four big goons with guns, and even if he's stupid enough to try something, four armed goons can take him down before he can clear a holster. So unless you suspected him of having rigged the place to explode like a terrorist suicide bomber, "protecting the other staff" is as simple as frog marching the guy off the property hemmed in by four big bulls in suits.

You don't have to be a conspiracy nut to think they're not telling the truth about what happened, you merely have to look at the timeline of publicly available details & note that they not only don't add up, the picture the ThreeLetterAgency tries to make it present leaves a hell of a lot of holes & edges that don't match. If you're already disinclined to believe anything a TLA agent says, this kind of crappy jigsaw puzzle job of hammering unmatched pieces together & claiming they fit perfectly just makes you even MORE incredulous in disbelief.

Deliveroo to bike food to hungry fanbois queuing to buy iPhones

Why anyone would do business with Apple is a mystery.

I recently attempted to buy a new Imac because Apple has the best screen reader for the blind, hands down bar none.

First I went into a store, specced it out, handed over my CC, & went home thinking I had just bought myself a new computer. Custom order with free shipping to my home, and I was looking forward to getting it. I hadn't been home even thirty minutes when I get an SMS & email stating there was a problem charging my card & I need to contact my bank. I get said notices five minutes after my bank closes for the rest of the weekend. I get to twiddle my thumbs until Monday, but at least I figured that my bank was on their toes to block the potential fraud use of my card. First thing Monday I call my bank, authorize the charge, get the fraud limit raised on a one time, temporary for 24 hours, so Apple can try to make the charge again. Call up Apple, explain situation, give order number, reconfirm my CC details, & tell them they've got less than 24H to place the charge or they'll hit a wall again. The CSR assures me the charge went through fine. Wednesday morning I get another SMS & email stating there was an issue with charging my card & I needed to talk to my bank. I check my balance & Apple didn't bother to even TRY to place the second charge, so they ignored the 24H limit & slammed face first into the fraud wall again. I decide I'll let the order die, take cash out of my account, & go back to the store to pay it all up front. Except later that same day I get an SMS & email congratulating me on my order, informing me that the next notices will be when it ships, & to enjoy my new computer. I check my bank again & *NOW* there's a charge for the computer - dated Monday. Except there was no charges pending when I checked earlier, my bank knew nothing of any Apple attempt, & it appears out of the blue in the hours between breakfast & lunch. Thursday the computer shows up & I sign for it. It doesn't work. I call up Apple "Accessibility Tech Support" (ATS), let them know the situation, & we spend the next two days trying to troubleshoot the issue. We finally make an appointment back at the store where I bought it for an "Accessibility Urgent Matter - Accessibility Expert Required" meeting. I get there 15 minutes before the appointment only to find out they had let their "Accessibility Expert" *go for a three hour lunch* & wouldn't be back any time soon. They give me a newly hired, not acquainted at all with accessibility, still wet behind the ears Rookie instead. He has to ask multiple questions of multiple coworkers before he can even figure out how to enable the screen reader (I tried to tell him it was Command F5), but once he was there he found the right bits. He plugged in their local keyboard & didn't even unpack the one that came with my machine, and when I asked if we could swap mine for another one I got no answer. He made sure the 'reader was on, auto launched after reboot, then packed my system back up & told me to have a nice day. I take it home, set it up, & it still won't acknowledge any keyboard I use. Three different Windows-centric, the Apple specific, & *none* of them were recognized by the machine. I called ATS back up again & told them the situation. They suggest I take *just* the keyboard back & exchange it. Except when I DO the CSR claims they can't find my order & wants to charge me for another keyboard. I'm so livid I go back home, pack it all back up, & arrange to return it the next day for a refund. The fuckers at the store tried to tell me I had to initiate the return online, even though I made the original purchase at their own counter. I told them they could either take it back & give me my refund, or I could place it on the hood of my sighted helper's car & plow it through their front doors in a shower of broken bodies, shattered glass, & chunks of brick. They opted to give me my refund.

I don't know WTF they thought they were doing, it could be just issues with THAT store, but it has painted Apple with a very shitty brush & I'll *!NEVER!* do business with them again. Why anyone else would do business with them is a mystery to me, but obviously mine is one case out of millions. Still, Apple can go fuck themselves with a 21.5 inch Imac, spinning, with the keyboard & mouse tethered to the sides.

Re: Idea for a new company :

I was going to post the idea of the delivery company having a laugh by delivering everything infused with laxatives. One can only imagine the "fun". I hear Picolax is pretty effective. *Evil giggle*

Check out this link! It's not like it'll crash your iPhone or anything (Hint: Of course it will)

Here's an evil thought...

Go to an electronics mega store or into an actual Apple store & head over to their desktop section.

Use a BlueTooth enabled device to broadcast that URL as a bookmark on the desktop.

Next go through the Iphone/Ithing section doing the same thing, so every Apple device now contains the bookmark.

Leave before anyone clicks said bookmark & gives the place a feisty, festive air.

I'm not worried that it's evil, I already know Heaven doesn't want me & Satan's got a restraining order...

Leeds hospital launches campaign to 'axe the fax'

Is this fake news?

Or have we been given just the fax, the whole fax, & nothing but the fax?

I'll get my coat... =-)p

A basement of broken kit, zero budget – now get the team running

At CD, re: timing.

As you write a macro/script to perform a particular action, include a pause/wait state for a random number of seconds/minutes between each step.

$Action, $Wait, $Action, $Wait, etc.

This mimics how a Human can get distracted doing something else (sorting documents, answering the phone, talking to a coworker, etc) & makes the boss think a person is hard at work.

It makes the job of someone else trying to figure out if YOU are doing it or a script is doing it MUCH more difficult, because the pause is never the same length with any logical frequency.

One day the task may take as little as a minute or two, another day may see it take as long as ten minutes, & the watchers can't figure out the ruse.

Just be sure to add in a "look for a key press" event to skip any such pauses, that way you can accomplish the scripted action just as fast as you can smack the space bar through the steps. (Or make it so hitting a key skips ALL the pauses & just finishes the whole thing as fast as inhumanly possible.)

Another good event to include is if you hit the Escape key to terminate the script. If the boss is approaching & you don't want to give away your secret weapon, slap Escape & pretend to be hard at work doing something else.

Hope that helps, and go have a pint on me. Cheers! =-)

Trump shouldn't criticise the news media, says Amazon's Jeff Bezos

Re: Twitterati

Notice there's no mention if the seat is inside or not.

How an augmented reality tourist guide tried to break my balls

For some odd reason...

My screen reader read "Tech-enhanced tourism" but I thought I heard "Tech-enhanced Turetts"(sp?) & laughed my ass off. The article only got better from there. Bravo! =-D

Solid password practice on Capital One's site? Don't bank on it

At VTCodger, re: writing passwords down.

I've got mine written down. I keep them in a lockbox at the bottom of a flight of unlit stairs in a disused lavatory with a sign on the door that says "Beware of the Vogon poet". I know nobody has broken in & gotten to my papers, I've been writing poetry the entire time. =-Jp

On a more serious note, when my bank wanted my email address to associate it to my account, I asked why. They said it was so I could do online banking. I asked what if I didn't want to do online banking? They said it would be so they could alert me if anything bad happened to my account. I told them to call me since that would be faster than an email. I refused to give it to them at that time in the belief that if I didn't activate the online portion of my banking account then criminals couldn't hack into it either. I was proved wrong. The fact that I hadn't given them my email meant that the bastards that social engineered themselves into my account set *their* email address as if it were mine. They then set a password lock on my account & froze me out of it. I had to physically go into my bank, refute everything that had happened to my account via the online path, & demand the bank refund all my money. They said it was all MY fault for not having given them my address in the first place. I nearly went over the counter & BEAT that little snot with their keyboard. (Never blame the victim. We're liable to take out our frustrations on you.) I ended up having to activate the online portion with a username, password, & my email address *just so I could prevent criminals from gaining access*. So even though I didn't want online banking, I had to register my online credentials in order to keep my account from getting hacked... Again.

Do yourself a favor & go visit your bank. Activate the online part, set up all the security hurdles you can, & then Just Don't Use It. If there's ever any online activity on it then you tell the bank it's fraud. How do you know it was fraud? Because *YOU* never did any online banking. Then you get to change all the passwords/security questions, & the bank gets to refund all your money.

=-|

At GnuTzu, re: the clipboard.

I don't remember the specific article here on ElReg that discussed it, but there was one about how you should disable the ability to Copy&Paste/Drag&Drop because script kiddies had figured out a way to use those vectors as a path to gaining access to your machine.

In IE it's under Options>Security>Miscellanious>C&P/D&D. I'm not sure about Firefox, Chrome, Safari, Edge, or any other browser, but should be somewhere similar (Security options).

I had already turned off those capabilities in my browser & so the "Proof Of Concept" site (to test if you were vulnerable) wasn't able to do much, but it was a great eye opener for others.

HTH & enjoy a pint, it'll help drown your desire to recode the web in LOGO. =-Jp

All aboard the Hype Cycle! What's DataOps? Well, it has no standards or frameworks. Got it?

*Gleefully RiverDances on the upvote button*

Dust off that old Pentium, Linux fans: It's Elive

Re: If it's snappy on old kit...

To everyone that replied, Thank You. Enjoy a pint in gratitude.

I honestly wondered how software designed to run on such low-grade hardware (think 386 with 512Mb of RAM) would run on modern high-grade hardware at its disposal. Like training a race car driver on an old electric golf cart that can't do much beyond a walking pace, then sticking them behind the wheel of a NHRA dragster capable of 300MPH quarter mile rocket sprints. Will the driver hack it or will they lock up & wind up spreading themselves like thin chunky salsa all over the place?

In a similar vein, will the software run like a champ on a 4GHz multithread CPU with gigabytes of system RAM, more gigabytes of VRAM, & an SSD with more storeage space than it even previously thought possible? Or will it see all the possabilities before it & lock up in awe thinking the computer version of "My god, it's full of stars!"?

The mental image that flashed through my head was of trying to run a game coded for the XT age of computers on the I7/4GHz/32Gb monster some folks have at their disposal. The phrase "Blink & you've missed it" kept cackling merrily in my head. =-)p

If it's snappy on old kit...

What does it run like on a modern 8th gen I7, 32Gb RAM, a 4Gb video card, & 250Gb SSD?

Register-Orbi-damned: Netgear account order irks infosec bods

If I had to register...

My name would become ShadowNetGear NetGearSystems & my email ShadowSystems+NetGear. That way when (not if) the account got compromised or NetGear decided to sell my data to third party marketers, anyone that called me "ShadowNetGear" would immediately get flagged as marketing shite to get flushed down the bog & I'd have proof that NetGear's servers were a steaming pile of security garbage. I'd be back to NetGear to kill my account so fast it would probably leave a plasma wake trail. NetGear device would get pruned from my network like a surgeon with a scalpel.

Sometimes it pays to be a paranoid bastard...

Activists rattle tin to take UK's pr0n block to court

Re: What could possibly go wrong,..

At Tim Jenkins...

*SpitSpray, soda out the nose, coughing fit & laughing jag*

Damn it man, you owe me a new keyboard!

That's ok though, I owe you a pint for that eggseptionally bag yolk. =-)

Vodafone hounds Czech customers for bills after they were brute-forced with Voda-issued PINs

Re: If you get a letter demanding payment...

Even my Reality Czechs bounce. =-)p

If you get a letter demanding payment...

...can you reply that the Czech is in the mail?

*Runs away before someone chucks a beer mug at my head*

Feel the shame: Email-scammed staffers aren't telling bosses about it

I had some guy try that crap...

At a previous employer who shal remane nameless to cover my arse, I was the PFY to our BOFH.

I got an email claiming to be from our boss & wanting me to wire "emergency cash" to him in some foreign location.

I cleared my throat, waited until said boss acknowledged lowly little me, & pointed to the screen with a "Sir, I'd like your opinion on this, please."

He took one look, snorted like a tickled bull, & shoved me aside "so I can have some fun with this fucker".

I was at a bad angle to the screen & couldn't read what he wrote in reply, but it must have been VERY wicked to have made my BOFH laugh like he was going to soil himself.

I wish I knew what he wrote, I would have taken notes!

=-D

make all relocate... Linux kernel dev summit shifts to Scotland – to fit Torvald's holiday plans

Re: Better option anyway.

I wondered if he "accidentally" booked the family vacation as an excuse to stay as far away as possible from American ThreeLetterGoons whom might want to "talk" to him in a private interrogation, I mean airport security check room?

Lord knows Scotland's better for hiding among the wildlife (sheep vs moose) to try & sneak past the TLG's out searching for you...

*Cough*

I'll go take my Dried Frog Pills now...

Canny Brits are nuking the phone bundle

I wonder...

You can't trust phone makers to support their devices. They claim to make monthly updates for the next $# months, but when everything is said & done, your phone is essentially stuck at whatever version it came with when you bought it.

If the only way a typical consumer has to deal with that situation is to either: 1) fork out another fat stack of cash to buy yet another bright new shiny in order to get the very latest OS version, or 2) accept that the phone makers don't GAF about security & buy a used phone instead. If they aren't going to support even a brand new phone, what's the point in buying one over a used one that also won't be supported?

Second thought is: Who the hell considers fleabay a viable source of making a purchase? "If it looks too good to be true, it probably is" isn't just a wise old addage, it's their fekkin' business model.

You can't trust the sellers not to advertise one thing & then send you another once they have your money, unless they only *claim* to have sent it & then claim it must have gotten stolen in the mail so you're SOL.

Would you REALLY trust a fleabay seller with a purchase of a couple hundred bucks for a used phone? Why not just save time by walking up to the bloke having a boot sale at 3AM in a dark alley? Same level of trust, accountability, & purchase protection that the device you buy won't turn out to be stolen/fake/a brick in the device box instead.

Last but not least, I wonder if I should increase my daily dose of dried frog pills. I don't think I'm cynically paranoid enough for this world...

Not so much changing their tune as enabling autotune: Facebook, Twitter bigwigs nod and smile to US senators

Pleas pass an American GDPR.

Just take their copy, add America to the list of places the GDPR applies, & then sit back to watch the devistation as places like Google, FB, & Twitter all implode. Their whole slurp abilities would be cut out from under them & rendered illegal, We The People would get to legally demand they purge their databases of all our data, & their market valuations would flush themselves down the bog as all those sources of income dried up like an icecream cone in a blast furnace.

Please, for the love of all that's Good & Fair, pass the GDPR here & make that particular law a truely global one!

Go Pester someone else: TSB ditches CEO over bank's IT meltdown

Re: So long and thanks for all the cash

I nominate you for best post of the month, possibly the year.

Enjoy a pint & try not to percolate it past your probiscus. =-)p

Uncle Sam wants tech toolkit to snoop social media stock scammers

Good luck with that.

The Reg just had an article about how badly AI/DL/ML does at trying to find trolls online because all it takes is for them to change the spelling, make an "accidental" typo, separate the letters with other characters (y*o*u k*n*o*w l*i*k*e t*h*i*s*?) and the AI can't find it.

Now you want to use AI/DL/ML to find $+0ck s(theCentsSymbol)m$? And how do you intend your AI to do any better at that job than the other AI's at finding trolls? You've got the exact same style of hurdles to jump & the same lame runner with one wooden leg on backwards & a swollen ankle on the other. Your AI can barely walk & you want that poor bastard to run a race with ever taller hurdles!

Good luck with that.

Huawei's Alexa-powered AI Cube wants to squat in your living room too

A bit disengenuous...

"With fixed-line broadband becoming something your grandpa complains about" implies that mobile broadband is so ubiquitous that anyone can get it anywhere at any time. Nothing could be further from the truth. Unless & until coverage is *actualy* available anywhere at any time to anyone on any device, fixed line wired connections will continue to be the best way to get online. Especially if you aren't so filthy stinking rich that you don't care that your carrier charges by the byte & throttles you back to dial up speeds because you're suddenly sharing the same tower as half a million other subscribers all trying to go online... You know, like what happens at a train station when the train comes in & everyone tries to check their messages? Or when a natural disaster strikes & everyone & their grandmother's dog is trying to call their aunt Gloria to say they're ok/ask for help in GTFO of the shitstorm/ask where another relative has gotten off to? Because those towers tend not to work too well when they're swamped with customers or standing water after that monsoon... I think you get the point.

Fast food, slow user – techie tears hair out over crashed drive-thru till

Re: Sad times

"How do you tell the clan of a Scotsman?"

Lift his kilt & count the blue ribbons! =-D

Data apocalypse is coming unless you buy AI, declares AI biz

Ponzi scheme?

You've just described your entire buzzword bullshite spewing sector. Thanks for removing all doubt that you're all a bunch of wankers!

No, eight characters, some capital letters and numbers is not a good password policy

Re: Dictionaries

I'll suggest one step further. Use a dictionary written in Elder God runes. Anyone trying to hack your password gets eaten by an irritated Elder One. Snacks for everyone!

At a job that will remain nameless to protect the stupid...

I was one of the IT monkies as an intern. The boss kept having trouble remembering his password, using the reset password link, flubbing the reset process, then calling up IT to fix things.

One day he calls up & demands it be reset, coworker does so & says "I've changed it temporarily to your first name. Log in & change it immediately." Boss hangs up, coworker starts to, & boss calls back so fast it rang as soon as the handset touched the cradle. Boss thunders "It doesn't bloody work!" Coworker & I trade confused looks. Coworker asks incredulously "You can't remember how to spell your first name?" Boss is so loud I can hear him from the next desk over. "Of COURSE I can you bloody fool! It's Y O U R F I R S T N A M E. Now fix the bloody thing!" Coworker & I just stared at the phone in disbelief.

Sometimes you can't win for trying...

Net neutrality haters spam Californians with annoying robocalls

I got that call this morning.

I let my answering machine record the robocall blurb then hit 1 to get connected to my political rep. The robocall wanted me to demand my rep vote against the bill, I told them to vote FOR it, then I played them the recording of the robocall. I suggested they ask any callers they got to demand their rep not vote for the bill if they had gotten that robocall as well, then tell the caller that the robocall was a scam.

I hope more folks demand their reps vote FOR the bill & thus use the robocaller's tactics against them. Not only do we NOT do what you wanted, we do the exact opposite in effort to show you just what a bunch of shitbags you are.

Bastards.

Facebook admits it was 'too slow' to ban Myanmar regime

Just ban FB already.

Just block all (non VPN) access to FB, declare FB a hive of scum & villany, & declare all FB holdings everywhere but the U.S. as frozen until/unless it stops fekkin around & plays nice.

You want Zuck to stop beating around the bush? Start costing him & his shareholders billions per day & watch how fast that prick gets his shite straightened out.

Fuck FB. Fuck it with a spinning metal barge pole. Sideways. Repeatedly.

Experimental 'insult bot' gets out of hand during unsupervised weekend

At Korev, re: tuning a vacuum...

You can tune a vacuum but you can't tuna fish. =-)p

Abracadabra! Tales of unexpected sysadmagic and dabbling in dark arts

At Prst. V.Jeltz, re: slapping.

Sorry for the downvote but I want to slap the user instead. Let me slap the user & I'll upvote you in glee. =-)p

At Roger Greenwood, re: heavy objects...

Like my ex boss' fat arse? =-)p

At Ogi, re: percussive maintenence.

You got an upvote for the UserFriendly pointer. Cheers & join me at the tavern so I can buy you a drink! =-D

At Alan W. Rateliff, II, re: head crash.

On a clear disk you can seek forever. =-)p

Southport: Come for a round of golf, stay for the flesh-eating STIs

I'm not sure which is more frightening...

A flesh eating sexual disease or having an HR department.

=-)p

Just how rigged is America's broadband world? A deep dive into one US city reveals all

Re: Finally!

I want a "heat map" of *the planet* for internet availability, the speed delivered, & if any & how much competition is available at a 1 Foot/1/3rd Meter resolution. In real time. No fucking around, no fudging, no bullshit, just an accurate real time map of global coverage. That will show *exactly* where the trouble spots are located, where the fraud spots are (ISP claims coverage but there isn't any, or claims $SpeedX but only delivers $SpeedY, etc), so we can take that fact to court & start forcing the changes we need to Make It Right.

$ISP wants to claim they cover $Location with $SpeedX, fine, let's check the map. Oops, it looks like you don't cover that area at all, much less with the speeds you claim. Care to fix that before we find all the C-level execs criminally liable for fraud, extortion, & Crimes Against Humanity?

*Deep breath*

And while I'm having this fantasy, I'd like that cute engineer from FireFly to ride Lady Godiva style on a pony...

You want how much?! Israel opts not to renew its Office 365 vows

Re: I think you just put yours in the shredder

All that is required for Evil to succeed is for Good men to do nothing.

Speak out against it, stand fast against it, shine the light of public awareness into all the dark nooks & crannies where it tries to hide, & tear it out by the roots like any other weed you exterminate from the garden.

At Terry 6, re: templates.

I've found that a good way to prevent accidentally overwriting a template is to use ($FileExplorer) & change the template properties to Read Only. The next time you open it & change something, attempting to save it usually results in a "Whoops! I can't do that, Dave, it's locked. Give it a different name." dialog box which solves the problem.

Hope that helps! Cheers & enjoy a pint.

That's the way the cookies crumble: Consent banners up 16% since GDPR

At RatFox...

I am aware that desktop users have a different web experience than smartphone users, so my comment only applies to the desktop.

I've got my browser configured to reject all third party cookies out of hand. Do not ask, do not allow, they can fuck right off. Even first party cookie requests must be allowed on a case by case basis, & 99% of the time I refuse those as well. About the only time I let a site set one is if I'm going to register an account there, especially if I'm intending on buying something. Those I allow because I want them to remember my account settings. Everyone else can get bent.

I also have my browser set to ignore pop ups, so any attempt by a site to drop a pop up in my face to whine about a cookie policy never gets shown at all. There's a soft chime in the background letting me know a pop up was blocked, but it doesn't even change focus from what I'm doing at the time.

All this means is that sites don't get to annoy me with pop ups whining to let them set a cookie, their third party affiliates don't get to set cookies, & they have to use other, less honest methods by which to track me.

I have to take your word on the pop ups appearing everywhere, but I can confirm that they have started to embed such notices *without* using pop ups to display them. I don't hit ok, I don't click deny, I don't interact with the notices at all. I just keep reading the page to find what I came for, then leave without ever letting them get an answer at all. Some of them try to stop me from accessing the site until/unless I click the notice, but then I get around THAT by hitting up DuckDuckGo for a plain text cache of the site & skip all their crap.

Are smartphone browsers so lacking in user options that you can't turn off JavaScript, third party cookies, & crank up the security to "Fuck off!" levels of paranoia?

Apple web design violates law, claims blind person

At Velv, re: site accessibility.

The W3C has an accessibility checker that is free to run across your site to find any improvements that can be made to make a site more compliant. It doesn't matter if the company is a tiny Mom&Pop or a ginormous multinational, the tool is free to use & the results free to follow.

I am not disputing your position, I think small Mom&Pop sites should get one free pass to "fix our foul up" via the checker before a lawsuit takes place, but there has to be a point at which the "free passes" get cut off & the legal actions begin. A Mom&Pop might get away with "we didn't know there was a free tool to use - if you tell us where it is we'll fix the site", but the big corps should get no such thing. The Mom&Pop can't afford to hire the legal team to make sure the site dots all the i's & crosses all the t's, but the corporations can afford it in spades.

A physical Mom&Pop store should enjoy the same "one time free pass" to have an accessibility check & report generated on what fixes need doing, so they can get free legal advice on how to CYA. But the big corps should get no such thing since they're more than able to afford the legal teams to do such a check on every property they own.

Enjoy a pint on me, it'll lubricate your throat & leave you a nice sturdy tankard in hand with which to bludgeon anyone that tries to steal your munchies. =-)p

At My other car WAS an IAV Stryker...

I lucked out that I got first post, but I can explain why I wasn't the person from the article.

There are Geneva Convention laws against me appearing in print "to protect global sanity".

Bah. Sanity (and pants!) is overrated.

No more sanity nor pants!

Dried frog pills for everyone!

*Cough*

Thanks for the pint.

I'll take your word that it's a beer, I can't see if the publican is handing me a frothy tankard of rancid goat-milk pudding...

Not that either the smell or taste would be a clue.

(Beer is nasty. What more proof of my insanity do you need?) =-D

At Dave 126, re: pictures.

Peecturez? Weee don' NEEED no steenkeeeeng peeecturez!</Snark> =-)p

That's one of the (very rare) things that's good about being blind, I save a gigaton of bandwidth by having my browser set to never download them at all. If there's no AltText associated with the picture, then my 'reader has nothing to read & I couldn't interact with the stupid picture anyway. *Sigh*

Ban photography! Pictures are Evil! Scrapings from Satan's scrotum! Ban them, Ban them all! </Pantless Git>...

To put it mildly.

So much of the Apple site is useless to a screen reader that it's a miracle I can interact with it at all.

I was trying to browse desktop systems to get an idea what kind would be best for my needs, but I ended up having to call them & talk to a CSR to describe everything instead. "You know we have a website for this, right?" Yes, but it plays merry hell with my screen reader & forced me to make this call. "Oh, well... Ok, I'll be happy to assist you..." Yeah, now that you know that if you don't I'll vote with my wallet & go somewhere else.

I've been told that the Apple screen reader can read their site just fine, but that does this Windows user no damned good. I need an Apple for the screen reader that would properly read the Apple site to me? I can't use the site to find out which Apple computer might be right for me unless/until I get an Apple computer with which to do it. Catch 22, meet recursion. Bah.

I don't blame the lady for filing the suit, I'm simply surprised it took so long.

To the law makers that want to restrict folks from filing ADA cases against companies for not being ADA compliant, ignorance of the law is not an excuse. It's already the law, they're required to obey it. If they fail to do so then we can file suit to force them to obey the law.

EU wants one phone plug to rule them all. But we've got a better idea.

At JohnFen, re: USB power.

There is a dongle called a "USB condom" that allows you to plug in any standard data+power USB cable in while the other side of the dongle only has the power connections. I've got one on my keyring so I can charge stuff in public places & not worry about where the USB port has been. It's less expensive & more convenient than a specific power only USB cable, you only need carry the single normal cable, as long as you remember to wrap your plug before you get a charge out of it. ;-D

You: 'Alexa, open Cortana.' Alexa: 'Who?'

At Doctor Syntax, re: the e-word.

I mentally replace "experience" with "excrement" & it all seems to make more sense. =-J

CADs and boffins get some ThinkPad love

Re: aspect ratio.

Doctor S, I agree that the laptop would be better with a full sized, desktop style keyboard with number pad, specific arrow keys, & the "six pack". The resulting screen would be very wide indeed which would please some folks & piss off others. But what if the screen could be rotated 90deg so that it became a very tall/narrow screen instead, thus pleasing the folks that wanted something better suited to that aspect ratio? I realize it would require the screen portion having to be mounted on a sort of stalk, the place where stalk & screen meet would be the rotation point, and that might play merry hell with the hinge where stalk met the laptop body, but I'm sure some smart design engineer would figure out a way to get it done. Might not that sell well to both groups of people: the ones that want a wide screen good for movies, AND the "make it tall!" crowd that wants to edit documents?

Prank 'Give me a raise!' email nearly lands sysadmin with dismissal

My email fun...

I was working for a small sized company at the time as one of the IT PFY's. The company had a policy of sending out happy birthday notices (think "reply to all" situations) to their employees on the Monday just prior to said event, thus giving all the other employees a chance to tell the birthday person "Happy Birthday!", leave a small gift at their desk, etc.

I slightly altered the mass email meant to announce mine so it included the line "<HypnoToadEyes>Bring me candy!</HypnoToadEyes>" in the hopes some of the others might bring me at least one of those tiny single serving packets of sweets.

I got the shock of a lifetime when I showed up on Tuesday to find my desk nearly *buried* under mounds of packets! They obviously got the hint.

I wound up filling a candy dish with all the poured-out sweets & sharing the bounty with my coworkers in thanks for the outpouring of happiness.

I hated having to leave when they went under, but the boss wrote me a glowing letter of rec to help me find new work elsewhere. =-J

You won't believe this but... everyone hates their cable company: Bombshell study lands

Re: Yay for me!

<Jealous hurrumph>You suck!</Jealous hurrumph> =-Jp

I've got Comcast for my ISP & they're so firmly entrenched at the very bottom of every list (except "Worst of" lists where they're #1!), I get shitty service for extortionate prices & no viable competition to speak of. The FCC claims I've got plenty of competition in my area, but given my choices are Comcast cable 3Mbps for nearly $100/month or AT&T DSL *if* I agree to pay to upgrade the POTS copper to my house first, the FCC obviously has their head firmly wedged up their arse.

My only real way to get anything approaching competition would be to move to the San Francisco/San Jose Bay Area near a Google fibre loop, but I'd spend more per month in rent than I currently make at all, so fat lot of good that would do me. I could have gigabit fibre to my cardboard box under a bridge! <Sarcasm>Hooray!</Sarcasm>

To add insult to injury, even though my customer notes in the Comcast system state that I am totally blind & don't watch tv at all, Comcast keeps calling me up & trying to sell me a tv+internet+VOIP bundle. "Are you looking at my account right now? You are? Good. What does it say in big, bold, bright text across the top of my customer notes? And yet you want to sell me service I can't use, don't want, & refuse to pay for? What kind of idiot ARE you? Wait, nevermind, you work for Comcast. Arsehole!" *CLICK*

*Deep sigh*

I want off this rock entirely. When's the next Vogon due by that I can sneak a lift from?

Revealed: El Reg blew lid off Meltdown CPU bug before Intel told US govt – and how bitter tech rivals teamed up

Re: Out of the Box Thinking and Virtual Tinkering Delivers Future Loded AI Bombes

I must be losing my mind, I think I understood something AMFM posted!

*Holds head in hands & staggers away in pain*