* Posts by macjules

2958 posts • joined 7 Oct 2014

Trump administration labels WeChat, TikTok ‘threats’ to national security, bans transactions with both

macjules Silver badge

Re: The DeathStar analogy is apt...

Please don't insult Vogon culture: Trump can not write poetry.

USA decides to cleanse local networks of anything Chinese under new five-point national data security plan

macjules Silver badge

Re: Cleaned from Chinese Intrusions? How about the TLAs of the USA and THEIR intrusions...

Or, as the late Benny Hill put it, "You stupid iriot"

UK data watchdog having a hard time making GDPR fines stick: Marriott scores another extension, BA prepares to pay 11% of £183m penalty threat

macjules Silver badge

Re: So net loss to the taxpayer

I can just see how this goes:

1) ICO Commissioner resigns and is boosted to HoL

2) Baroness Harding, fresh from the TalkTalk Track 'N Trace fiasco takes over

3) ICO sequester several BA jets in attempt to get the money

4) Nobody wants to buy them except BA who offer 5% as a buyback.

Self-driving car supremo Anthony Levandowski sentenced to 18 months in the clink for stealing trade secrets from Google's Waymo

macjules Silver badge

“Why I went to federal prison,”

That is absolutely brilliant. I wish we had something like that here in the UK.

You think the UK coronavirus outbreak was bad? Just wait till winter: Study shows test-and-trace system is failing

macjules Silver badge
Meh

If a rule or piece of local bureaucracy gets in the way of this ..

If a rule or piece of local bureaucracy gets in the way of this, let NHSX know and Capita Sopra Serco will fix it for you.

There, FTFY.

Microsoft confirms pursuit of TikTok after Satya Nadella chats to Donald Trump

macjules Silver badge

Re: Looks like Donnie the Don

Think it might just be a way for Trump to try and stop all those Sarah Cooper parody videos on TikTok.

Firefighters to UK Home Office: Yeah, maybe don't turn off emergency comms network before replacement is ready

macjules Silver badge

Re: "Anyone surprised at the gigantean cock-up"

Acceptance Criteria? If this is 'normal' Capita then 95% SRA is ok. On 1000 emergency calls that is a lot of dead people.

Two large flightless birds walk into a bar... The pub's owner was not emused *ba-dum tsh*

macjules Silver badge

Re: Cross-species sentiment detected

Failing that, a bucket of water or a box of tissues.

At historic Apple, Amazon, Facebook, Google CEOs hearing, congressmen ramble, congresswomen home in on tech market abuse

macjules Silver badge

But he has the +3 Reptilian Defence Cap on. Prevents the brain from overheating in the presence of Upright Monkeys by translating everything as, "I do not know the answer to that question".

Chinese ambassador to UK threatens to withdraw Huawei, £3bn investment if comms giant banned from building 5G

macjules Silver badge
Flame

Oh come on El Reg!

Kat would have had that one off pat:

"It's Huawei or the highway"

Virgin Galactic reveals giant mirror feature in cabin design for Beardy Branson's space bus

macjules Silver badge
Meh

So many delays

Perhaps Branson should take on Crossrail as well.

Only EU can help us, pleads Slack as it slings competition complaint against Microsoft Teams

macjules Silver badge

Agree, but Slack does have its uses, provided that do not need video or (TBH) audio conferencing thrown in. Slack's webhooks are easier to implement than Teams and Teams also has an issue where updates can throw out your channel hook scripts: meaning that you have to rewrite them.

As a way of avoiding Teams then Slack combined with Hangouts works quite well I find.

Don't strain yourself, Zuck, only democracy at stake... Facebook makes half-hearted effort to flag election lies by President Trump

macjules Silver badge

Re: why aren't postal votes considered a fraud risk in the US?

Not that widespread, but still a cause for concern.

Capita's bespoke British Army recruiting IT cost military 25k applicants after switch-on

macjules Silver badge

Re: Next step: outsource the whole military to Capita...

We would end up with a new definition of BYOD - Bring Your Own Defence

Only surprise for OnePlus fans with firm's latest tilt at the mid-market is a sub-€400 price tag

macjules Silver badge
Happy

Heavily leaked Nord is a smartphone, not an incontinent Scandinavian

Are you sure that Kat Hall is still not working at El Reg?

Incredible artifact – or vital component after civilization ends? Rare Nazi Enigma M4 box sells for £350,000

macjules Silver badge
Coat

Re: A fine piece of German engineering

strong lesson to never make use of security by obscurity

Perhaps a certain Twitter CEO might want to buy an Enigma encryption machine.

(I'm here until Четверг - try the borscht)

Forget about Wipro chairman saying no one would lose their job due to COVID-19: UK staff told they're facing redundancy

macjules Silver badge

Aw, bless

"Premji also replied to shareholders' queries around justification of compensation to the CEO (highest in Wipro's history)"

Always a good reason for others to suffer.

Babe, I've changed! Twitter wants to try a relationship again with devs after first major API tweaks in years

macjules Silver badge
Facepalm

Err

In doing so, the shouty social network is making yet another attempt to stabilize its development platform and earn the trust of individual, academic, and corporate coders whose software might just make the company more valuable.

Crossed lines perhaps?

Twitter says hack of key staff led to celebrity, politician, biz account hijack mega-spree

macjules Silver badge

Just imagine ..

Both Xi Jinping and Trump's twitter accounts being hacked and being used to start a war.

On second thought, Trump doesn't need to have his account hacked to do that.

The Devil's in the details: Church of Satan forced to clarify that no unholy rituals taking place in SoCal forest

macjules Silver badge

Re: Church of Satan?

I stand corrected by you and WikiPedia. I thought that LaVey initially worshipped Satan as a deity and only much later moved to atheist religion.

macjules Silver badge
Facepalm

Church of Satan?

Is that LaVeyan Satanism then? If so then they did revere Satan as a figurehead, which makes their claim, "as an atheistic religion, we don’t believe there is anything to make a sacrifice to" about as serious as the Flat Earth Society's claim that they are indeed a global community.

€13bn wings its way back to Apple after Euro court rules Irish tax deal wasn't 'state aid'

macjules Silver badge
Gimp

Apple said the case was not about "how much tax we pay, but where we are required to pay it."

Oh great. So from now on is it ok for us to buy Apple equipment from somewhere else in the world where it might be much cheaper?

You've think you've heard it all about automation in technology? Get a load of this robot that plugs in cables

macjules Silver badge

Re: It's been done

That's nothing. The Russians have developed a robotic civil servant. 'She' helps with issuing certificates to testify that people have a clean criminal record and no record of drug use - no mention of use of lethal force in the event of non-compliance or failure to salute the picture of Dobby on the wall.

Google employs people to invent colours – and they think their work improves your wellbeing

macjules Silver badge
Joke

Any colour you like?

And we all know what colour matches chocolate .. the one that they feed you.

Icon: because it is the closest to a steaming pile of Google.

It's handbags at dawn: America to hit France with 25% tariffs on luxuries over digital tax on US tech titans

macjules Silver badge

I am sure we could get Boris to start sniffing tonic water and wearing his underwear on his head. The Sarah Cooper impressions might not be so great though.

Cornish drinkers catch a different kind of buzz as pub installs electric fence at bar

macjules Silver badge
Coat

Works for the sheep

Now about those cattleprods ..

Linus Torvalds banishes masters, slaves and blacklists from the Linux kernel, starting now

macjules Silver badge

Re: Proudly ignorant

My understanding is that the phrase originates (and is still used) in London clubs where members voting on a new joiner could select a white ball to allow or a black ball to reject. Hence the phrase "blackballed". Clubs shared a list of those blackballed members and so you get the phrase "blacklist": nothing whatsoever to do with slavery.

macjules Silver badge

Re: Reply to Linus Torvalds

You mean, "Yeth Mathter" .. need to work on your Igor lisp.

Apple: Don't close MacBooks with a webcam cover on, you might damage the display

macjules Silver badge

Next Mac OS update: removal of the green light so that you can not watch us watching you to help make our displays even thinner.

IBM job ad calls for 12 years’ experience with Kubernetes – which is six years old

macjules Silver badge
Facepalm

Very much a "Doh!" moment -->

Last year IBM Interactive were advertising for a ReactNative developer vacancy, with at least 10 years experience requirement. Which presumably was very hard to fill since ReactNative has only been around for about 5 years.

Drupal drops first big upgrade in five years and looks forward by looking backwards

macjules Silver badge

EOL for Drupal 7

End of life has been extended to 2022, not 2021. Please see PSA-2019-02-25

Tony Blair tells Russian infosec conference that cross-border infosec policies need more gov intervention

macjules Silver badge

Re: My normal response to Tony Blair

And his missus. Though usually prefixed by “He’s made me a shedload of money”.

An email banning our staff from using TikTok? Haha, funny story about that, we didn't mean it – Amazon

macjules Silver badge

Absolutely terrible!

Using TikTok is unAmerican: it harvests a ton of data which it then sends back to the evil Chinese empire. Good Americans should use Facebook ... which collects a ton of data and then sells it to the evil Chinese empire.

The reluctant log trawler: The buck stops with the back-end

macjules Silver badge

Re: Session ID?

You could use HTML5 SessionStorage (window.sessionStorage) to differentiate between each tab's activity.If you want to ensure the same session ID in each you can use 'Duplicate tab'.

macjules Silver badge
Thumb Down

Session ID?

Why was there no tracking of the uisessionid?

Sounds a bit odd to me.

Tata Consultancy Services says pandemic's most powerful punches landed in Q1 - and it's still dancing

macjules Silver badge

Knock-on effects

A large number of TCS contractors working in the UK were/are unable to return home due to the travel lockdown. As a result of this I notice that daily rates for IT contractors appear to have plummeted, with some agencies saying that they can offer senior web developer contractors at £150 per day, as opposed to the normal £500 per day I would expect to be paying.

Keep it Together, Microsoft: New mode for vid-chat app Teams reminds everyone why Zoom rules the roost

macjules Silver badge
Unhappy

How does one "emote in a natural way"? Does one artistically arrange a pile of faeces in the street and draw a smiley face on it?

Hungry? Please enjoy this delicious NaN, courtesy of British Gas and Sainsbury's

macjules Silver badge

Or, in Sainsbury's case, you probably do not want to see an "Out of cheese error"

Civil-rights probe: Facebook has completely failed to… Zuck: Look over here! We’ve banned four groups! Go me!

macjules Silver badge

Facebook has directed significant time and effort into ensuring the report was a positive one

Somewhere in the lower, hotter depths of Hell Joseph Stalin and Joseph Goebbels are watching this unfold and wondering why they could not have had someone like Mark Zuckerberg working for them.

GCHQ's cyber arm report on Huawei said to be burning hole through UK.gov desks

macjules Silver badge

Re: No doubt

More like "We sneaked a look in Super Spy Steele's drawers: you won't believe what we found!"

Shopped recently in a small online store? Check this list to see if it was one of 570 websites infected with card-skimming Magecart

macjules Silver badge
Coat

And gutted I presume?

macjules Silver badge

Re: 40000

Poor Leicester City (lcfc.com). Not much luck coming their way at the moment.

Leaving Las Salesforce: Paul Smith fashions a new role at ServiceNow

macjules Silver badge

a cloud-based provider of workflow tools

Wow, That is some description of ServiceNow. I think that the rest of us know it as an offshore support service where a nice lady in the Philippines asks if you wouldn't mind restarting your computer.

NASA trusted 'traditional' Boeing to program its Starliner without close supervision... It failed to dock due to bugs

macjules Silver badge

Re: So what happened?

After all, if you're developing some top-secret military aircraft, an engine is an engine; and the sub-contractor is none the wiser.

Oh dear. "That engine looks like it could run at Mach 15: are we going to put it in a Project X jet? No, its just an engine - we are fitting it in a 737MAX."

Boolean bafflement at British Airways' Executive Club: Sneaky little Avioses - Wicked, Tricksy, False!

macjules Silver badge

the former World's Favourite Airline

Nicely put.

Baroness Dido Harding lifts the lid on the NHS's manual contact tracing performance: 'We contact them up to 10 times over a 36-hour period'

macjules Silver badge
Facepalm

Re: Two out of three ain't bad

Certainly if I received a call from someone saying "you have been in contact with someone with Coronavirus, we need you to give us the name and telephone number of every one of your friends, just in case you have passed it on to them" then my reaction would be along the lines of, "Sounds like Advanced Fee Fraud, is this NHS Lagos by any chance?"

Your 2.3m Instagram fans won't stop the FBI... Web star accused of plotting to launder millions from cyber-crime

macjules Silver badge
Meh

An Instagram super-star

Stopped reading after that.

Oracle sued by a shareholder who alleges its lack of progress in diversity amounts to 'dishonesty'

macjules Silver badge

Those would be: Larry's cat, Larry's dog and Larry's pet tortoise named Donald.

Linux kernel coders propose inclusive terminology coding guidelines, note: 'Arguments about why people should not be offended do not scale'

macjules Silver badge

Re: No problem with most of it, but...

Shh, Remember: Vampire Unlives Matter

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