* Posts by Paul

82 publicly visible posts • joined 20 Jul 2007

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MS roll out exploit prediction with Patch Tuesday

Paul
Gates Horns

the dreaded non-disclosure

"The Microsoft Active Protections Program (MAPP),/~/ will operate under non-disclosure agreements."

Ooh! I bet the hackers are shaking in thier boots at that!

Roll up for the freetard smackdown

Paul
Pirate

"For the record, neither Andrew nor El Reg will make a penny from this."

Well of course not, making a penny for an evenings work really wouldnt be worth it.

However, free beer, that's another story altogether!

YARR! PASS THE ALE!!!

ITV gets adverts into video

Paul

oh yes and...

Now there is a reason to put :

"this space inentionally left blank" IBM were on to something after all...

Paul
Alert

@-coward with mixed feelings

"imagine if in the Corrie, there's a billboard in the shot, as a advertiser, I should be able to buy that billboard and put whatever I want on it, or change the beer in the rovers for my brand and pay for that or whatever."

You really have been in the US for too long, for two reasons:

1You want to watch constipation street, and 2 you seem to WANT product placement.

Come back before its too late (and FFS keep away from ITV till the doctor tells you its ok)

Hawaiian anti-LHC lawsuit thrown out

Paul
Coat

"Beak bins botanist's bid to bust boson-botherers"

Holy hell! the sun has nothing on you guys!

(other than the paparazzi shots of the last El-reg party) ;-)

Elvis has left the border: ePassport faking guide unleashed

Paul

@ Mike smith

You can lead a horse to water...

Not if your Chuck Norris, he can make it drink.

David Blaine does a Benito Mussolini

Paul
Pirate

Hanging upside-down, albeit alive

Shame, I'd like to see him stung up by partisans and shot.

Cray, Intel, and Microsoft birth baby supercomputer

Paul
Coat

What really matters...

Is what does COD4 run like on it and can you do quad SLI?

Did the width move for you, darling?

Paul
Flame

Did the width move for you?

Well I'd Have to say NO, its still fixed, therefore it doesnt move!

Thats the problem.

I have a solution, free of charge...

UNFIX THE GODDAM WIDTH!

And to quote yourself John:-

"we need to unbreak the mobile platforms the new design seems to have broken. We should also be looking at how effectively we cater for smaller screens and very large screens"

Yet again, I have a solution, free of charge / gratis / do it now I beg you...

UNFIX THE GODDAM WIDTH!!!

Is any of this getting through? or is El-reg going to continue on ignoring the 100's of requests in comments for exactly the same thing? This may be a flame, but its a flame with a purpose, and one that deserves more than "tough, we 'fixed it' and were not admitting it was a bad idea"

Texting worse for drivers than drink or drugs

Paul
Flame

Hell yeah!

Free weed and driving games, Where do I sign up?!

Flame?

Theres no smoke without fire...

OMFG, what have you done?

Paul

Not so much WHAT were you thinking as WHY were you not.

I seem to have been censored last time I vented my spleen.

Possibly for calling the re-designer a whalesong listening crackhead, I'm not sure...

Quote="Our thanks to all The Register staff, particularly Aaron and Murray, for all the extra work they've put into the project. Special thanks also to designer and strategy boutiquester Malcolm Casimir of April Strategy for his efforts to save us from style catastrophe."

Not so sure you were saved from a syle catastophe, more like betrayed for a 30 peice silver cased josstick and whalesong relaxation set.

Tesco reveals unannounced Dell 12in netbook

Paul
IT Angle

Ubunto Linux!

Every little helps,

Like not buying computer equipment from the muppets at tesco...

IT?

No we dont know what that is, maybe its down the bread isle, ask sharon over there.

Phorm: Our business is fine, honest

Paul
Alert

@ Oh for Phuck sake-

Loyal to Virgin Media?

WTF were you thinking. They've been shite since the beginning of time itself.

Now Hollywood is chasing UK downloaders

Paul
Happy

@ David Farrell

It was good quality according to the "freind" who used my machine without permission. ;-)

Northrop in electric blaster cannon milestone

Paul
Boffin

More, we need more

Until I can get my own frikkin' Spartan Laser I'm not impressed.

Goggles?

Because its sensible, Why else?

Satnav turtle locates cannabis stash

Paul

"Chevy Chase"

Are you taking the pi$$?

DARPA calls for 'DUDE' combo infra-nightscope

Paul
Black Helicopters

I second that, Sentence of the week me thinks...

"When you're a man in black aboard a black helicopter doing black ops using black funds against the black hats, different kinds of black lighting are merely shades of grey"

Nokia grabs control of Symbian - then gives it away

Paul
Coat

Japan...

"Nokia had S60, originally intended for button interfaces, Sony Ericsson had UIQ, meant for pen control, and DoCoMo had MOAP(S), intended for Japan"

What do they use in Japan if it's not buttons or pens? IR sensors to detect ninja style movements?

Wha! [chop] Chaa![kick] Hui![52 hit combo finishing move]

What do you mean I'm being arrested for threatening behaviour? I was just textin' the wife!

Mines the one with the Katana strapped to the back...

Ofcom sharpens cutlasses for pirate radio assault

Paul
Alert

In Leeds.

There is DnB radio on 88.1.

Its pirate and keeps ketting shut down, Strangly it doesn't stop them having "talk to frank" and "operation trident - cut gun crime" adverts every hour.

And they stream online.

Proving there is some good to pirate radio.

Certainly a lot better than our 'local' radio, run by chrysalis with crap music loads of inane chat and identikit branding.

Go anywhere in the country, same logo, same crap, just different frequency & different brainless muppets talking. Not really local is it?

Life a mess? The Moderatrix can help

Paul
Go

Where does your lap go..

when you stand up?

Rogue MP3 Trojan streaks across P2P networks

Paul
Paris Hilton

BBC are reporting

That the file poses as a girls aloud [no they shouldn't be] song,

If you like that crap you deserve anything you get!

Paris, cos she knows all about releasing any old shyite for money.

Wi-Fi spoofing sends Jesus phone disciples off the true path

Paul
Paris Hilton

@nobby

Damm you beat me to it....

"The team used an Asus eeePC configured to impersonate access points and software radios to jam legitimate networks."

I for one am shocked and appalled at the lack of eeePC lady on beach pictures. Surely this story constitutes at least a flimsy argument to display one, its never stopped El REG before!

Paris 'cos it looks like she's just lost her eeePC.

Dear ISP, I am not a target market

Paul
Go

EASY way to make phorm illegal...

denyphorm.blogspot.com — Deny Phorm is a blog page running a campaign to raise awareness of Phorm and help to make what they do a criminal offence under Regulation of Investigatory Powers Act.

By adding expressed terms to your website denying Phorm the right to intercept communications between your website and your users; any interception by Phorm is a criminal offence.

DivX shutters also-ran cat piano video site

Paul
Unhappy

OMG! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

RIP stage 6!

Stage 6 is excellent. Downloadable vids, new shows from america we cant watch yet, some pretty interesting documentaries, WHY GOD WHY?

All i can say is its going to be hammered for all its worth til the bitter end.

[click]download

[click]download

[click]download

[click]download

[click]download

[click]download.......

Enraged vegan spitroasts Reg hack

Paul
Dead Vulture

P.E.T.A =

People Eat Tasty Animals.

<--Especially Chicken

English language succumbs to Symbiotic Ephemeralization

Paul
Alien

Ever wondered...

What amanfrommars does for a living?

Now you know!

Where is the red planet icon when you need it?!

Highways Agency forecasts last year's traffic

Paul
Happy

Normal service back soon...

So that would be the borked site we had before with nothing working then?

Great! And how much did this cost us?

BOFH: Beancounter bashing

Paul
Unhappy

Leeds

Why Pick On Leeds Its a great place Chavs aside...

Schools chief pushes Big Brother out of dinner line

Paul

My 2 sisters go there.

I used to as well,

There was absolutely no choice given regarding this, even my youngest sister who takes packed lunches and has no intention of ever eating school meals (she is a fussy eater) had to give her print she has never even used the system.

When I asked her about this she said she was threatened with being put in the isolation unit if she did not comply.

Talk about Stalag Morley High, the kids can't even take their jumpers off on the way home in the middle of summer.

Mr Townsley is going to be on the receiving end of some choice words tomorrow. Including demands to delete my sisters' data, making sure that the drives its stored on are written to and wiped at least 4 times to ensure proper removal.

Hopefully by the time I've finished there will be a nice letter of apology to my sisters and parents.

I may even email it to el-REG. Wish me luck!

US Army dalek assassins to pack mini-missiles?

Paul

The Bot pic near the top

Looks like the crappy cooler i got with my P4 ages ago with some wires and lego bits stuck on.

Water cooling obviously a bit too bullet sensitive.

O2 starts charging for calls to non-places

Paul

dont trust o2.co.uk email addresses as these are NOT COMPANY ONES!

Do not do as advised below, sending your signatures to a private individual isnt wise (duh!)

Anyone can register for one of those o2 webmail accounts, internal staff and offical email addresses end o2.com.

----------

Keep the phone

By Jim Cosser

Posted Wednesday 5th September 2007 13:24 GMT

Yes, you get to keep the phone (and in my case the PS3) and dont pay any outstanding months on the contract. Lets all give o2 what they deserve a BIG headache and less full pockets.

You can also just email instead of posting you need to include your mobile number and a scan of your signature. Email address is: disconnections242@o2.co.uk

Taser markets electric cattleprod gun to the laydeez

Paul

Easiest marketing job ever....

There's no "apparently" about it, pink in womens minds means BUY, with extreme predjudice if necessary.

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