* Posts by The Empress

36 posts • joined 3 Nov 2013

TikTok says Trump administration ban is based on fake news about the app and its back end

The Empress

something something

Orange man bad. Scream at the sky

When you gaze long enough into the bork, the bork will gaze back into you

The Empress

Just don't invade Poland

That never ends well for anyone.

RPA firms: We have our own process mining tools. Process miner Celonis: We're all about automation now

The Empress

Never give managers this tool

They will only create massive agglomerations of Feudall Empires reliant on huge scales of human intervention in order to create the right metrics.

To stop web giants abusing privacy, they must be prevented from respawning. Ever

The Empress

And if that doesn't work.

Well let's test out how robust their bollards and blast shields are.

Work life balance? We've heard of it. Pandemic means 9-5 shifts are a thing of the past for many

The Empress

They try to flog us donkeys 24/7

But we resist and demand to be put on shifts. I don't care if your hair is on fire, when the shop whistle blows I'm out.

After Trump, Congress, Supreme Court Justice hit out at tech giants' legal immunity, now FCC boss wants to stick his oar in, too

The Empress

The best solution

Is to round up the top 500 people at every social media company. Then cut their fucking heads off and stuff them on spears. Then burn their houses down and flog their naked screaming children down the street.

Has Apple abandoned CUPS, the Linux's world's widely used open-source printing system? Seems so

The Empress

Airprint works better on Mint anyway

It's hardly a benefit struggling with CUPS when it will never work right.

The Empress

Re: will drop PPD file support soon

That's more or less the only reason to use Chrome.

LibreOffice rains on OpenOffice's 20th anniversary parade, tells rival project to 'do the right thing' and die

The Empress

All I need an office suite for is to read other people's horseshit. And those lovely 900 page Powerpoints they like to create at work extoling the virtues of Agile streamlined workflows. Everything else is in email or some god awful web app that's mostly json crap.

It's that time of the year when Apple convinces you last year's iPhones weren't quite magical enough, so buy this new 5G iPhone 12 instead

The Empress

Sorry but my XR with iOS 14.0.1 is about as 'feature rich' as I can stand. WTF is that pulsating blob that pops up when I push and hold the power button?

Years after we detected two neutron stars crashing into each other, we're still picking up X-rays. We don't know why

The Empress

Space aliens and Trump colluding to steal the 2020 election. It's science.

'20,000-plus staff' could face the chop in spin-off of IBM's IT outsourcing biz, says Wall Street analyst

The Empress

So basically they're creating IndiaCo. Another Indian outsourcing company. And half the 20,0000 will come back as contractors at 3/4ths pay

The Empress

Re: 20,000 people?

There's a third category - the process drones. The dull dreary plodders who blindly and stupidly follow the process no matter what it says.

Windows 0-day pops up out of nowhere Twitter

The Empress

Who gives a shit anymore

Windows is fucked. The end

Here's why AI can't make a catchier tune than the worst pop song in the charts right now

The Empress

Pop music is more or less made by machines already. The human, of which there are 6 or 7 in the entire industry, just press a buttons on the Macbook to string the parts together. After all, with 9 words, 1 beat and 3 notes, it's not all that hard.

IBM wants everyone to marvel at the size of its Strategic Imperatives

The Empress

The old IBM is back

And not in a good way. After obscuring their financials to the point where their CFO is pulling numbers out of his ass, IBM has returned to mass firings. Who doesn't think that the Board compensation committee decided to award execs according to how many people they toss out and that alone.

Farewell then, Slack: The grown-ups have arrived

The Empress

MS will screw it up

They will make a bloated clunky confusing mishmash that limps along while MS tells us it will work better if you only buy Azure and SharePoint. It won't work well with Android or iOS, it will have endless patches and unless your org is running a perfectly matched set of identical clients things will break. The beauty of Slack is that it precisely HASN'T changed much. It does what it needs to do, simply. They haven't tossed in 3 million horrible features no one wants.

Uni IT man stole £22k of Macs to pay for smack

The Empress

Macs are worth more per pound than heroin

Seems like he should be stealing heroin to buy Apple products.

UK takes first step towards criminalising driverless car hackers

The Empress

Let's hope all the hackers and they successfully defend their actions in court as female empowerment for women in STEM.

Twilight of the idols: The only philosophy HPE and IBM do these days is with an axe

The Empress

I can't understand why IBM's board isn't indicted

I can only conclude that they're being paid to be indifferent. At some point someone has to say they're not meeting the standard of fiduciary responsibility. Billions of dollars flushed down the toilet as executives award themselves absurd bonuses and rewards.

Shopped in Forever 21? There was bank-card-slurping malware in it for, like, forever

The Empress

that's fine - the only people who shop there are hookers, divorcees, and teenagers using their mom's stolen credit card.

Missed opportunity bingo: IBM's wasted years and the $92bn cash splurge

The Empress

You assume they would not screw up those acquisitions

IBM reliably takes over companies, drives out the talent, IBMifies the company and drives it into the ground under a mountain of process, bureaucracy and rules.


The Empress

Bond Villain 2.0

He wants to be a Bond villain like Bezos

IBM asks remaining staff to take career advice from HR-bot

The Empress

IBM has jobs?

That's a serious question. In my years there I never saw a single lateral posting that was real. I've never heard of someone using the system to actually find and get a different job. I never saw a single person hired in who wasn't a personal friend of a management consultant last hired by the VP. On rare occasions people were allowed to move laterally if they threatened to quit but that's clearly not going you work this time.

Cisco's purple princesses gush workplace joy

The Empress


Since their CEO for years was gay.

Debian Linux founder Ian Murdock dead at 42

The Empress

According to MSNBC

Global warming takes another one.

NSA spying is illegal? Then let's make it law, say Republicans

The Empress

Maybe you're unclear who the president is

Look it up. Black guy, funny name. A democrat. His program.

Forget Nokia: Finland's promising future is to be server central

The Empress

Of course you can racks and racks of servers pretty much anywhere on earth, which is kind of the point. And you're not committed to following byzantine European labor laws.

Windows XP's market share grows AGAIN!

The Empress

Which is more a statement that computers don't do anything materially better or different than 10 or 12 years ago. The rest of cosmetics.

Gmail falls over after hitting 'Great Firewall of China' – report

The Empress

The EU sticks to fines and lawsuits

It's so much more genteel and passive aggressive.

IT crisis looming: 'What if AWS goes pop, runs out of cash?'

The Empress

Who knew?

Who knew IBM would actually get something right by forcing the cloud sector to at least make their budget?

Siri, did we just take a hit in that voice-recog patent fight?

The Empress

Apple discovered they don't own all the courts

There's still a few they haven't bought

Symantec: Antivirus is 'DEAD' – no longer 'a moneymaker'

The Empress

makes sense

most malware threats are imaginary. run a firewall and you'll eliminate nearly all of it.

How Microsoft can keep Win XP alive – and WHY: A real-world example

The Empress

Or you could set aside the depreciation for 10 years and use that accrued amount to buy new computers

Private pain: Dell layoff bloodbath to hit over 15,000 staffers – insiders

The Empress

So all those jobs were soon going to China anyway.

iPad Air peels off in racy pics for wide-eyed geeks, reveals 'worst battery ever

The Empress

What We have said for years

Is to either make these infernal devices sealed and waterproof or open with replaceable batteries. Not NEITHER of those things.


Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2021