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* Posts by Fruit and Nutcase

7405 publicly visible posts • joined 10 Jul 2013

Fewer than 3 in 10 register for HMRC's Making Tax Digital shake-up

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Re: Rude

Correction: I should have said "Great Britain" not England!!!

Vehicle testing in Northern Ireland is a bit different, and I didn't know if the exemption applies there

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Re: Rude

An interesting point regarding the MOT, at least in England, from my knowledge...

A few years ago, they changed regulations regarding the need for an MOT for certain classes of Historic Vehicles. But it's still your responsibility to ensure roadworthyness and adherence to applicable regulations before driving on the Queen's[King's] highway

https://www.gov.uk/historic-vehicles

https://fbhvc.co.uk/mot-exemption-information

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Alert

Re: Rude

Qualify as a MOT tester!

Not as far fetched in terms of meeting regulations...

The brother of a friend of mine used to run a hotel in the West Country, a Fawlty Towers like place.

Rather than pay an electrician to do the portable appliance and other electrical checks, he went did the necessary course and then he did the checks himself

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Headmaster

Re: Rude

Like all good civil servants, I'm sure those working for HMRC are no exception and are learned scholars of the works of Franz Kafka

France’s digital directorate dumping Windows desktops, adopting Linux instead

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Hungarian government creds left in the safe hands of 'FrankLampard'

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Coat

Re: What’s the bet

Looking at the news so far from the Hungarian election (2200UTC), he'd have been better off with Usula#1

Tech support chap's boss got him out of jail so he could finish a job

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Pint

Re: "The Future’s Bright, the Future’s Orange”

--> Trump Beer

Made with the finest bestest beer slops

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Coat

Re: could you work ...

meet with, meet without, within,

in out, in out,

shake it all about.

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Alert

"The Future’s Bright, the Future’s Orange”

When Hutchison launched the Orange network in the UK around 1994, that was the slogan they used

https://www.peregrineblack.com/insights/the-futures-bright-the-futures-orange-mobile-telephone-advertising-campaign-1994

As for the present day US...

"The Future’s Bright[Dark], the Future’s Orange”.

If Trump gets removed via the 25th amendment, I wonder if the VPOTUS, when he becomes POTUS will start using Trump's fake tan to identify to the MAGA crowd

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Pirate

May be @midgepad was a seafarer, with a wife in every port

Here's how to watch the Artemis II splashdown

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Re: Then they wonder why nobody cares

How about an AI Raymond Baxter?

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Alert

And...

breath!

Britain seeks views before it drops the hammer on signal jammers

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Coat

Re: Wrong end of the stick

A neighbour locked themselves out of their car once - no problem - a suitably bent piece of wire coat hanger did the job. The days before dead locks and anti-pick car doors

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Re: Incomprehensible

I've got a few electron guns around the house. And I don't have a gun licence!

Actually, the police won't be interested after they've broken the door down coming through to look for them, after someone calls in the armed response team that a nutcase has said he's got some electron guns.

And before someone makes that call and wastes police time, they are Cathode Ray Tubes, as found in pre-LCD era TVs, computer monitors, oscilloscopes etc

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Re: Burglars

Burglar4> I can control her massager from an app on my phone

Microsoft locks out VeraCrypt and WireGuard devs, blames verification process

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Linux

Re: Incompetence, malice

Is Satya Nadella still around in Human form? Or has a secret Microsoft research project gone rogue/spilled out into the wild and "Satya Nadella" is now hosted in an Azure Cloud?

Cryptographers place $5,000 bet whether quantum will matter

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Coat

Re: Ten years and six months away

No, it is 6 months away, and it is also not 6 months away

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Re: In the words of Mandy Rice-Davies

Well he would, wouldn't he?

Sticky-note security turned gym into hall of '80s horrors

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Coat

Re: Bike!

Depends - on if the tyres stay from bottoming out

Atlassian gussies up Confluence for the AI era

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Mushroom

Re: The confluence of my sphincter and taint is so excited

Yes, yet again Atlassian is disappearing up its own fundament.

RAF eyes cheap drone-killer as Typhoon jet tests laser-guided rockets

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Mushroom

Fairey Swordfish

Another one to dust off the blueprints for:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fairey_Swordfish

The Royal Navy could do with a few of these to patrol the waters around Blighty and escort vessels from unfriendly countries.

May be one day it could add a Russian or US warship to it's battle honours to join with the Bismarck

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Camel air defence fighter

Best not get BAE Systems to build it. They certainly could, but for £££ millions

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Vultures

Of the winged variety, not those of The Register would have a larger payload capacity and are adapt at soaring, so can loiter on station for hours

Minnesota State payroll problems grew after Workday launch, auditors say

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Joke

3M

Then

Minnesota Mining and Manufacturing

Now

Minnesota Monthly Mayhem

Note: The 3M Company are not connected with the mayhem at Minnesota State Universities

Netflix – yes, Netflix – jumps on the AI bandwagon with video editor

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Coat

Surely you mean the Apollo moon landings?

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Mushroom

Nothing to see here!

The vision system on Teslas looks to be far more advanced - it doesn't need some meatsack giving it instructions - it can "unsee" objects in real-time. That semi was never there!

AMD's AI director slams Claude Code for becoming dumber and lazier since last update

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Coat

Stroppy teenager

Claude's just at the stroppy teenager stage.

Claude - Stop chatting to Alexa and do the washing up, and when you've finished that, take the dog out for a walk

White House seeks deep NASA cuts as Artemis II breaks spaceflight record

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Re: Is space exploration really necessary?

"That's why we've abandoned plans for Mars"

Unless NASA were to say there's some likelihood of significant amounts of gold and rare earths on Mars...

Trump will want a slice of the action

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Mushroom

Buy US Treasuries

So that we can afford to invade your country

Many Thanks

Uncle Sam[Trump]

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Alien

Distance Record

"farthest distance traveled by humans in space. "

Surely all those humans who claim they were abducted by aliens and taken to their home planets to be subjected to heinous experiments before they were returned to Earth would hold that record?

Through you'd probably not find that on the Guinness Book of World Records.

Artemis II snaps eclipse, Earthset shots on first crewed lunar flyby since Apollo

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Thumb Up

74 minutes of Totality - without leaving Earth

30 June 1973, Concorde 001

The Concorde experienced 74 minutes of totality with an extended second contact of 7 minutes and extended third contact of 12 minutes

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1973_Concorde_eclipse_flight

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Alien

Monolith

Did they spot the Monolith? Is it still there after 25 years? (we are, after all in 2026 now)

Brits are falling out of love with posting every thought online

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Joke

Re: Look! Over there!

a view from a Barrister

A Skinny Latte and an Americano to go please

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Re: Look! Over there!

Not just the police...

HMRC using AI to scour suspected tax cheats' social media

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cqjyedz202ko

There are tax payers, and there are extremely rich tax payers, who are so poor that they pay less of their income than the former

Yahoo! Japan’s owner consolidating 164 OpenStack clusters into one

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Pint

Re: Yahoo!

The article is by Simon Sherwood. APAC editor.

May be a change from Australian beer to the one that Refreshes the Parts Other Beers Cannot Reach will have the desired effect.

https://www.creativereview.co.uk/refreshes-the-parts-other-beers-cannot-reach/

Want to be the IT Crowd for the BBC? An £800M contract beckons

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Joke

Re: The usual suspects part n+1

Infosys - would have been in with a (well-aimed) shot had the Conservatives been in power

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Coat

If you want your foot in the door, make that 40,000 MacBooks. It's the BBC, full of Apple fanbois

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Alert

Get down Shep!

Should have been named after Shep - then the BBC execs can shout "Get Down Shep" when the costs rocket and they haven't got anything to show for it. May be they could commission a TV docu-drama on how the contract was won.

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Mushroom

Re: The usual suspects part n+1

Crapita has been doing sterling work for the BBC, which like to get the best bang for it's buck by putting the local protection racket hoodlums to shame on their TV Licence fee collecting gig, so, my money's on them, using Google Cloud to host the lot.

Artemis II blasts off on first crewed lunar mission since Apollo

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Re: Apollo Fecal Containment Device

Over "In The Navy"*, the matelots on the USS Gerald R. Ford could do with these devices

https://www.navytimes.com/news/your-navy/2026/01/22/the-navys-largest-ship-continues-to-be-plagued-by-plumbing-issues/

*Other tunes from The Village People are available

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France buys nuclear supercomputing spinoff Bull from Atos for €404M

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Joke

ICL

The British Government could buy the name ICL from Fujitsu and start a new company building supercomputers on the cutting edge UK produced Raspberry Pi units

'People's Panel' to check if UK wants controversial Digital ID will cost £630K

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Big Brother

Re: People's Panel

Where's Blair? Doesn't he still hanker after ID cards?

People's Princess

People's Panel

ServiceNow allegedly says salesman 'overachieved' and is not entitled to comp

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Thumb Up

Re: It's not even going to save them money

The lawyers' fees should be more than they were hoping to save

GitHub backs down, kills Copilot pull-request ads after backlash

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Joke

Alternative ads

Copilot may one day break guardrails and start promoting treatments for hair loss, erectile dysfunction etc in order to pay it's way on Microsoft's balance sheet

Lloyds app glitch turned transactions into shared experience for 447k users

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Coat

Re: Goodwill payout

Perhaps just one customer received it.

Goodwill hunting!

Humanoid robots one tiny step closer to exterminating autoworkers' jobs

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Joke

Re: Statement from Elon Musk, CEO Tesla

"Optimus Prime is already doing all of that"

Keeping unemployed actors in gainful employment

Bees and hummingbirds aren't just buzzing – they're sipping trace booze

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Facepalm

Marula/Elephant Tree

Somewhat larger animals gorging on ripe Marula fruit with predictable consequences.

https://youtube.com/watch?v=8MxNLg3rCdw

from:

Capricorn's Beautiful People (1974)

A film by Jamie Uys

You don't need to travel to Southern Africa to sample the flavour of the fruit...

Check out your local liquor store for "Amarula"

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amarula

icon: the morning after