* Posts by fruitoftheloon

927 publicly visible posts • joined 26 Jun 2013

It's holistic, dude: How to dodge the EU's £17m data regulation sting

fruitoftheloon
Pint

A well known outsourcer

Apols for AC, normally I don't do that...

About 13yrs ago a well known UK outsourcer, that isn't currently terribly well regarded in the public eye (a little unfair I think) was exposed to a fraud in one of its' financial services bits, dodgy folk ran off with £300k [or thereabouts]. This was in the public domain btw.

I was asked to accompany head of risk/audit to see the Group FD, who's response was [I quote] "I don't f'ing care what it costs, f'ing sort it and then get a proper risk mgmt system in across the whole group, NOW"

Unfortunately he did mean NOW, well, we had the crux of it working in a few months, global rollout with 18 months.

With 4 x n-tier environments, PROPER controls, it was in situ for [I think] 8yrs or so.

It's amazing how snappy IT depts and young/keen ISVs can be, it probably helped that the budget was (we added it up afterwards) about £3.5m

All of which & this article all contribute to me hopefully improving on the IT architecture and system design for my startup (IT budget about £100 a month)

Naughty sysadmins use dark magic to fix PCs for clueless users

fruitoftheloon
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@ Blitheringeejit: Re: It's all about "So how does that make you feel?"

Blitheringeejit,

quite, I have oft thought that any keyboard connected to anything that runs Windows needs a:

"Do it now you bar steward' button... above Return

I have rarely felt the need for this on my Macintoshen.

Cheers,

Jay

fruitoftheloon
Pint

@Naselus: Re: The more annoying bit...

Nasulus,

quite, when a user would ask me why it worked if I [or a compatriot] were standing next to them, I picked one of two stock answers:

- cloud formations

- '42'

Which they were usually absolutely fine with.

Have one on me, it's Friday!

Cheers,

Jay

fruitoftheloon
Happy

I am not making this up...

Fellow commentards,

aeons ago my brother-in-law's PC was behaving in a most odd manner, crashing at odd times, in a most unpredictable fashion.

His friend who 'new a lot about computers' convinced him that he had downloaded something dodgy (intentional or otherwise), hence he would need to re-install Windows and put everything back in....

Well I ran a free AV/spyware thingy, 'nowt showed up.

Nothing was obvious from log files, different programs would crash at different times, with no obvious cause/trigger.

So I opened the lid, after removing a humungous pile of dust balls that were perched over the DIMMs (can't recall exactly what was in the PC) and those by the CPU, then funnily enough it worked absolutely fine.

I do love 'amazing coincidences'!

I was quite pleased about it all...

Cheers,

Jay

In real life, Q is a woman! Head of MI6 calls for more female techies at SIS

fruitoftheloon
Pint

@AC: Re: Pointless

AC,

you are more on the money than you believe....

The local 'wimmin' think that it is just downright weird, that I [as in a bloke] drop our lad off at school AND collect him in the afternoon, rather than the missus doing so.

I am not making this up, four years after first dropping him off, some of them still give me really weird looks.

Ironically when any of them have asked what wifey's job is, I mention that she works in the NHS, 99% of the time the response is 'so she's a nurse then?'.

I mean, there aren't any female GPs, Consultants in the NHS are there now???

They are usually quite stunned when I mention she has a Masters in Nuclear Medicine and also did Astrophysics 'because it was interesting'.

Stereotypes work in a multitude of directions...

Cheers [off to the pub when wifey gets home shortly]

Jay

Annoyingly precocious teen who ruined Trek is now an asteroid

fruitoftheloon
Joke

@Cranky Yank: Re: Blame the EU?

CY,

no, for reference I suspect that it's due to having parents from different countries, who speak DIFFERENT LANGUAGES, an activity which many [who hold a Passport] enjoy whilst travelling...

/sighs

Samsung set a fire under battery-makers to make the Galaxy Note 7 flaming brilliant

fruitoftheloon
Happy

@AC: Re: Are VW / Samsung / Theresa May employing the same advisors?

AC,

would you be so kind as to remind me of the items the PM has uttered that you are tad miffed about?

Thanks,

Jay

Chevy Bolt electric car came alive, reversed into my workbench, says stunned bloke

fruitoftheloon
WTF?

@Voland: Re: Odd belief

Voland,

indeed. of course if the vehicles were designed and engineered PROPERLY I wouldn't have thought it a problem eh???

Cheers,

Jay

CBI: Brexit Britain needs a 'sensible and flexible' immigration programme

fruitoftheloon
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@AC: Re: Employers have called for a "sensible" immigration programme

Dear AC,

may I point out that:

- you may have tried a bit harder

- you haven't met me

Also WTF are you trying to glean information and [presumably] draw valid conclusions from reading the comments section of the Daily Express FFS?

I don't have to spend my time rebutting the [I presume as I haven't read it] nonsense espoused by such folk to justify to you or ANYONE ELSE why I voted to Leave - which btw has zilch to do with immigration.

It's called democracy matey, those folk are as entitled to their views as you and I are to ours.

Chill dude, the world will continue to rotate!

So how many downvotes will I get from folk that can't be arsed to courteously reply to my post?

Cheers [I am actually in the pub at the mo!]

Jay

fruitoftheloon
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@Toltec:Re: Sensible? That's new.

Toltec,

have one on me (I voted leave btw).

Cheers,

Jay

fruitoftheloon
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@AC: Re: The Register Think Tank

Dear AC,

out of interest, what is the ratio of UK/EU/other nationals in the business that you run??

Just wondered...

fruitoftheloon
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@Doctor Syntax: Re: It will be horrific

DS,

evidence from local acquaintances (in middle of Devon) who have farms 'n stuff doesn't bode well, apparently the locals are basically to f'ing lazy and work shy to actually get up each morning and pull veggies out of the ground.

Seasonal EU labour is much more reliable by all accounts!

My ha'penny.

Jay

It's now 2017, and your Windows PC can still be pwned by a Word file

fruitoftheloon
FAIL

@TheVogon: Re: In 500 Years...

TheVogon,

may I suggest that you re-read the comment your responded to?

[Paraphrasing] it meets the needs of 95% of users, NOT that it works for 95% of the time...

D'oh

BOOST! LEGO's computing future and its ground-breaking past

fruitoftheloon
Happy

Wicked!

Well, my little lad [8yo] will love, it. I suspect that I will rather enjoy helping him with it too!

MacBook killer? New Lenovo offering sexed up with XPoint booster

fruitoftheloon
Happy

Re: @ m0rt: Yes, Yes, Yes, No!

m0rt,

aha, I remem a little while ago looking up something (which clearly I can't recall atm), after which iTunes (which I have no need for) doesn't [to my eye anyway] randomly start up every now and then and insist that I agree to the Ts and Cs.

It hasn't been back since [thank cluck]!

Cheers,

Jay.

fruitoftheloon
Happy

@ m0rt: Re: Yes, Yes, Yes, No!

m0rt,

one has been using Macs as primary kit (personally purchased) for nine years or so, what is this 'iTunes' thingy that I hear many folk writing in agony all about then?

Just wondered....

Cheers,

Jay

fruitoftheloon
Happy

@Alain Williams: Re: Yet another myopic article on laptops

Alain,

I must confess I haven't trawled the authors previous articles, but isn't the main thrust of THIS ARTICLE about a laptop that has some serious welly, as opposed to perfectly valid (for a different use case) more modestly priced machines????

Cheers,

Jay

fruitoftheloon

@Wibble: Re: Hardware's half the story

Wibble,

indeed, I find Win7 less painful on the MBP as I only use it for VS.

Cheers,

Jay.

fruitoftheloon
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Indeed

Apple [current] MacBook Pros ARE grossly overpriced.

[happy owner of 2015 MBP bought in 2016]...

The Register's Top 20 Most-Commented Stories in 2016

fruitoftheloon
Happy

@Moiety: Re: @AC: @malle-herbert I'd love to see a top 20...

Moiety,

AHA! thanks very much.

Cheers,

Jay

fruitoftheloon
Happy

@AC: Re: @malle-herbert I'd love to see a top 20...

AC,

thanks for your input, not too sure what you mean re approval of mutually-agreed standards (if it's about useless kettles/toasters/hoovers, then I don't)

I am not sure how to put links here to specific posts, some I have found:

Paper mountain, hidden Brexit: How'd you say immigration control would work?

4 months

fruitoftheloon

Silver badge

FAIL

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@Richard: Re: @Charlie @AC 20-23 pages for EU citizens

Richard,

THE thrust, there weren't any other points at all?

Do you genuinely think that most folk who voted exit did it because of the fairly shite campaign of the out crowd?

Can you remind me of the POSITIVE elements of the remain pitch for why we shouldn't leave, because I sure as fk can't remember any....

Over to you boyo!

_________

Doctor Syntax: Re: @Loyal Commenter: Parliamentary negligence

Ds,

I haven't told you anything, what I sought to do was to share my (I thought reasonable) opinions about the shenanigans so far...

I doubt anyone who voted was 'sold a pup' by their fave group, i.e. in or out, I thought the BS quotient was quite high on both sides, of course the remain bunch had the in-built advantage of being able to guarantee the world would end if we didn't obey their sage thoughts, and for good measure they also thought it prudent to blackmail us in adavance lest we have our an opinion that differed from theirs!

Re Mr. Gove MP being on the sidelines, I agree with you completely, may I suggest you point out the PM's error next time you are sharing a glass at Chequers, undoubtedly she will amend her omission sharpish.

Cheers,

Jay

__________

@Loyal Commenter: Re: Parliamentary negligence

Lc,

Will you please calm down a bit, take a few long, slow breaths eh?

If I may correct some elements of your post and make a few pertinent observations:

- we don't know what is going to happen yet re 'our rights'

- you do realise that some of our brethren did work in Europe/marry foreigners/study in Europe before we joined the Common Market?

- err, we aren't having a recession, would you be happier if we did?

- the referendum may even have positive results, such as Heads of State pointing out that the EU fiddles with stuff that should not be its' concern (light bulbs, hoovers, now maybe kettles & toasters too),

- The commission may finally figure out that the Euro isn't working out for many countries (that don't speak German), so perhaps they should think about changing course (don't laugh, it'll happen at some point)

- the World Bank recently acknowledged that sacrificing Greece to save the Euro probably wasn't their finest hours (not a typo)

- Mr Gove can't really have much involvement with 'making it happen', due to being not quite as clever as he thought he was, plus he's no longer a Minister of State

- as to the 'if you voted Exit, you must be a thick, racist eejit', err f-off matey, you are painting with a very broad brush, ironically showing YOUR prejudices

- I have no doubt some folk assumed that an 'exit' would mean foreigners should offski sooner rather than later, I believe such views to be fundamentally wrong, childish, stupid, inconsiderate and very UN-BRITISH

Has it occured to you that many people who voted to leave the EU (not Europe) may have many reasons NOT related to EU citizens living here and immigration in general to vote as they did?

Ooi I can get by in French and German, my wife is pretty good at Italian and Spanish, we had our recent honeymoon in Paris, I love French wine & food, German beer & wine. We have three cars, two built in Germany, one in Austria (with German oily bits). We hope to retire somewhere in Italy or southern France.

Hopefully that gets the point across that we ARE NOT ANTI EUROPE.

Europe is great, the EU ISN'T!

Cheers,

Jay

_________________________

Dr. Paul, Re: Parliamentary negligence

Dr. Paul,

I didn't miss that at all.

Also one has a pretty good knowledge of stats and associated mathematics, with a general leaning in the direction of risk and probability.

As to the voted for change being 'stupid' because it was a small margin, how so?

Would you maintain your position re the stupidity of the vote if it had been to remain, by the same margin?

It matters not if the margin was 5, 5k or 5m votes, it was a referendum, and folk voted as they pleased, that's how a democracy functions, for a given 'value' of democracy of course...

As I have stated hereabouts before, I voted for out, but would have been perfectly happy if it went the other way, life goes on, the planet still rotates, politcians do what they do best (preserve their benefits, build empires, pretent to listen to the plebs...)

The march for europe site isn't doing much from here at the moment, I'll check it out later.

I wonder (half in jest), if it should have named 'pray for europe'...

Thanks for your engagement here btw.

Regards,

Jay

fruitoftheloon
Pint

@malle-herbert Re: I'd love to see a top 20...

m-h,

indeed, funnily enough re the Brexit 'debate' (stop sniggering at the back), I am still surprised how quickly I found many fellow commentards making enormous (and erroneous) assumptions about WHY I voted the way I did.

All the more so as I tried to debate the points concerned from one or more viewpoints.

I thought it was quite amazing re the ratios of +/- to each post made.

Btw have one on me...

Cheers,

Jay

The Life and Times of Lester Haines

fruitoftheloon
Happy

.sheds[!] a tear

Cluck a duck, another good one has left the building earlier than one would have hoped....

'Toyota dealer stole my wife's saucy snaps from phone, emailed them to a swingers website'

fruitoftheloon
WTF?

@Emmeran: Re: Maybe...

Emmeran,

a question for you, what is a 'photo is', apparently abbreviated to "photo's"?

I mean some mean spirited folk may take such spoutings to be vapid dribble of someone who had a best a tenuous understanding of grammar (and even less of common courtesy).

I look forward to your response.

HMS Queen Lizzie to carry American jets and sail in support of US foreign policy

fruitoftheloon
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@Fantastic Bob: Re: U.S. has used Harriers...

Bombastic,

great idea, that would require some politicians and [un]civil servants to both open their eyes and have a f'ing clue about the real world.

....not much chance of that happening then eh?

Have one on me.

Cheers,

Jay

Plastic fiver: 28 years' work, saves acres of cotton... may have killed less than ONE cow*

fruitoftheloon
Pint

@AC: Re: Pandora's box?

Rhys,

very good, like it a lot, have one on me!

Jay

fruitoftheloon
Happy

@cloth: Re: Pandora's box?

Dear Cloth,

I am very well educated thank you very much (I like books, they're great!)

And at the moment, "they will be dying anyway", it might be nicer if they didn't (for ones' personal view of 'nicer' of course), but die they do...

Cheers,

Jay [former veggie, 'twas the bacon that done it']

fruitoftheloon
Stop

@Hplasm: Re: Not much of a chemist then?

Hplasm,

so what is your suggestion then?

Finally. BlackBerry lobs out new BB10 OS update

fruitoftheloon

No visibility here

Not popped up yet for my Passport (in the UK)...

Virgin Media is so rustic and artisan you get to hand-sort your own spam

fruitoftheloon
WTF?

F-me is this a wind-up???

Eek, folk 'running a business' made a conscious decision to use VM???

That's scary, would be good to have a list of them, then I'd know where NOT to put my business...

Chernobyl cover-up: Giant shield rolled over nuclear reactor remains

fruitoftheloon
WTF?

@AC: Re: Good luck to building the same for Fukushima.

Ac,

you are a gormless idiot, I assume you don't talk about this based on your experience as a Chartered Engineer?

/sighs

Heard of Brexit? The UK vows to join Europe’s Patent Titanic

fruitoftheloon
Happy

@AC: Re: Awww, British lawyers are so cute...

AC,

ooi how many jobs and resultant tax income to the treasury is dedicated to Euro clearing, as a function of 'total employment and UK tax take' for our financial services as a whole?

Just wondered, as I assume you would know!

Kind regards,

Jay.

Has Canadian justice gone too far? Cops punish drunk drivers with NICKELBACK

fruitoftheloon
Happy

Each to his (or her) own

Well, I like some of there stuff...

Investigatory Powers Act signed into UK law by Queen

fruitoftheloon
Happy

@Farcycle: Re: Never I'd ask this question...

Farcycle,

thanks matey.

Jay

fruitoftheloon
Pint

@AC Re: Never I'd ask this question...

AC,

thanks, something to start with.

Re speeds & stuff, even though we're in the middle of Devon, we get 50 down / 100 up on our broadband, could that have any bearing re potential VPN providers on my 'shopping list'?

Your help is much appreciated, please have one on me!

Regards,

Jay

fruitoftheloon
Happy

Never I'd ask this question...

Fellow UK commentards,

suggestions for VPN providers please?

I have no idea how they work, but I can figure most sh!t out fairly quickly, all helpful suggestions welcome...

Cheers,

Jay.

Google's Chromecast Audio busted BT home routers – now it has a fix

fruitoftheloon
Stop

@ MNGrrrl: Re: "simple" solution...

MNGrrrl

meanwhile back in the real world....

Assuming you were not posting in jest, do you realise how many folk genuinely believe that Google IS the internet, and have no idea at all what a 'router' is, aside from being great to make lovely shapes on long bits of wood?...

/chortle

How-to terror manuals still being sold by Apple, Amazon, Waterstones

fruitoftheloon
FAIL

@AC: Re: @Bloke

So says the 'brave patriot', hiding behind the cowards' curtain...

Irony much???

Sorry, iPhone fans – only Fandroids get Barclays' tap-to-withdraw

fruitoftheloon
Stop

@djstardust: Re: The Apple walled garden

Djstardust,

the reason why they do this is quite easy really, they are not the same person as you, they have different priorities (rational or otherwise), and differing requirements...

Hence they chose a phone that you don't like!

Btw I don't have an iPhone, I f'ing HATE touchscreens, they don't work for me at all...

Cheers,

Jay

Trial date set for Brit police 'copter coppers over spying-on-doggers claims

fruitoftheloon
Joke

@ Hans Neeson-Bumpsadese: Re: dragging them off by the rozzers

HNB,

that sounds f'ing painful....

Happy days for second-hand smartphone sales

fruitoftheloon
Thumb Up

@David Roberts: Re: Market saturation again

David,

bollocks - no, sense - yes...

Cheers,

jay

AI gives porn peddlers a helping hand

fruitoftheloon
Happy

@Alister: Re: Lack of Research

Alister,

which ones?

More to the point how do you know this?

...somewhat tongue-in-cheek question!

Will Microsoft's nerd goggles soar like an Eagle, or flop like a turkey?

fruitoftheloon
FAIL

@Champ: Re: Looked Inevitable?

Champ,

err what matey?

Err what matey, it could be that some folk prefer Apple kit (I bought an MBP 6 months ago) to Wintel.

I don't give a rat's derriere about MS powering half of anything, I looked at a Surface thingy around the time I got the MBP, oh the Surface[e] are sh!t and they haven't finished developing them properly yet...

And irony of ironies my MBP runs Win 7/VS very nicely thank you, much better than the Lenovo that preceded it...

I have always had much better service support (when needed) from Apple than I have had from Gateway 2000/Sony/Toshiba/Lenovo.

Also the residual values on Apple kit is generally much better than Wintel comparables

YMDV.

Jay

Google and Facebook pledge to stop their ads reaching fake news websites

fruitoftheloon
Happy

@brainbone: Re: an opinion that differs from yours

Brainbone,

could be, I find it hilarious the efforts some folk will go to to find something/anything that justifies the supposed actions of folk that they disagree with....

Thanks for your input.

Regards,

jay

fruitoftheloon
FAIL

@Planty: Re: Bit late now

Planty,

right so FB is the reason why moi and quite a few others voted differently to you, your evidence for this earth shaking statment would be???

Do us all a favour and stop whining, has it ever occured to you that some folk may have an opinion that differs from yours????

Cheers,

Jay

NHS IT bod sends test email to 850k users – and then responses are sent 'reply all'

fruitoftheloon
Happy

@DrLifeCandy

...flawed...

Sound-mufflers chuck acoustic sleep blanket at the noise-plagued

fruitoftheloon
Happy

Err, Boots 'Muffles' wax earplugs work for me...

Yes, I can still hear the smoke alarm or small boy asking for something during the night...

Parliamentarians ask Obama to withdraw Lauri Love extradition request

fruitoftheloon
FAIL

@AC

Dear AC,

if you had even the slightest, teensiest bit of knowledge about autism you would know that there is what educated people call a 'spectrum', which means that different people are different!!!

One can be diagnosed with Aspergers (as I have been) and realise that hacking other peoples' computers may make them a bit grumpy, someone else with a similar diagnosis may not realise that...

I try wherever possible not to paint a not insignificant portion of people with a broad brush, after ensuring that it has been thoroughly dipped in a large bucket of ignorance and prejudice; may I kindly suggest that perhaps you give it a go?

Us autistic folks have enough challenges with life as it is without other folk talking out of the other end of their alimentary canal...

Regards,

Jay

Government Digital Service under review after rural payments cockup

fruitoftheloon
Stop

@ Pseudonymous Clown Art Re: Conspiracy Alert

PAC,

yep, it's a bitch, 50 megs down, 100 up, here in a little village in the middle of Devon.

On a related note, I am regularly surprised how often farmers driving on the road often pull over to let other traffic go past them...

Ymdv.

Regards,

Jay

Microsoft: We're hiking UK cloud prices 22%. Stop whining – it's the Brexit

fruitoftheloon
Happy

@Len: Re: £

Len,

I get [most] of your points, ooi would you invest in any large German banks at the moment?

This particular situation is rather new [regretably].

Cheers,

Jay.