Posts by Seán

Apollo 11 - The Owners' Workshop Manual

Cool

It's so cool that the maximum effort of the biggest brains around from 40 years ago is literally a technological joke book 40 years later. I hope the BNP close more hospitals and build more rockets.

Pocket DV cam packs pico projector

@Wankers etc

It's no use as a replacement for a HD display. It's useful for clever ui and secondary output stuff and in a pinch watching the news beamed onto someone else's back or the roof of your car/office

Archbishop says Catholics confusing confessionals with couches

Kiddie fiddlers

As an atheist who grew up as a Catholic (post Vatican II) we never had all the really crazy shit they had back in the wacky 50's like learning off huge swathes of nonsense and Latin and all that (I believe they retain a lot of that guff in the US but they have always been a bit slow).

Of all the various mind tricks the confession device is probably a good one. Freud said the Irish are the only people not susceptible to psychoanalysis. I'd say it's because they've been examining their thoughts and behaviour since they were six years old. The unexamined life is not worth living according to Socrates.

Still it obviously doesn't work with everyone which is why so many of the dumb fucks wear dresses and rape children and, even worse, a lot more dress wearing imbeciles cover up those crimes.

Gahhh, right. It's a nice sunny day, I'm off to punch a priest in the face.

At long last, internet's root zone to be secured

Hold on just a minute

When will they be consulting their masters in China and the EU?

Murky world of recruitment gets DoJ probe

European thinking?

I think it just means they are thinking, something which seems to have been forbidden under bush.

Gordon 'to sacky' Wacky Jacqui

I feel your Joy

We had a donkey named McDowell or somesuch as minister for Justice here, he brought in such wonderful notions as no smoking in pubs and random reasonless breath tests for drivers, pissed off the cops pissed off the judges pissed off the people. His party had high hopes in the last elections right up until he lost his deposit and was beaten out of his seat by the Greens. Another fool who didn't take into account the desires of the people.

Astronauts suffer 'exploding' space headache

THC

THC pills will sort them out

Fans decry tennis gal's breast-slash plan

@Frank Bough

Though you admit you know absolutely nothing about medicine you're scared of it. Hey that's ok, people have irrational fears all the time, you're like an american frightened of socialism. The important thing is that you don't make a complete tool of yourself in front of normal people.

@ChrisC You may be male and self identify as a man but you're not really cut out for the job. Perhaps you should get some surgical augmentation yourself.

Microsoft arms half-wit developers with PHP handgun

@Joel

Please go outside you seem to have dogshit in your rollerblades and no I don't want a latte.

Poor Americans

Just substitute Islam for PHP and you can see the USAian "fear of the unknown" leaping off the page. Some bad man has told Ted a scary story about PHP and then he made the rest up for our own good.

This drivel isn't amusing and has all the information value of a Rush Limbaugh diatribe.

Egyptian cuts off todger to spite his face dad

Obey

It's a major problem for Islam which holds it back like most of the East, this "respect" for elders. I respect my old man because he respects me and allows me to make my own decisions. I'd also chop his lad off before I'd chop off my own, and I'd like to thank pops for that.

Boffins: Ordinary lightbulbs can be made efficient, cheaply

@Ethel grahamcracker

Don't you worry your pretty little head with all those percentages. You forgot to take into account the cost of the bulbs and you also ignored the mercury. Still you did a great job for a vegetarian.

The CFC bulbs don't last forever and I can tell you that buying a replacement bulb especially once I'd found out about the toxic materials was a no brainer. Just buy a lower wattage bulb than you used to 40 is adequate for most purposes.

Dimmer switches are ridiculous.

ISS stuffed with full staff of six

Tcha

Soviet era technology like the space stations, the interplanetary probes and the efficient rocket engines which were designed and shown to work before the USAians stole the ideas. Look up the Venus missions. Thankfully the Russians were involved in the design of the ISS or a lot of people would have been killed by american hubris and incompetence.

Really if you find yourself brainwashed by propaganda it's your civic duty to find out the truth rather than regurgitate the same sad old dross.

Google Wave - interwebs idealism in real-time

I for one

would like to welcome our Google overlords and wish them all the best.

This is really incredible stuff, combining it with something like drupal could lead to incredible near unimaginable progress. Singularity inducing stuff.

I see you didn't get Ted to review it doubtless he would think of it as a rip off of some MS idea and claim open source was wrong in every way. I'd see it more like Volvo giving away their seatbelt tech in the interests of safety rather than making money.

Atlantis safely back to Earth

America loses again

The shuttle is an example of us poor design like the c17. A huge overweight underperforming chunk of obsolete high maintenance wastefulness It would probably have cost less to build and launch a second hubble (without a busted mirror) than to do the repairs in orbit.

Women coppers eager to drop trousers

Std uniform +tailor

Give out a standard uniform and a few bucks then take it to a tailor and have the damn thing fitted properly. It works.

Chinese screw sex theme park

Say what you like

It's working, There'll be no more opium war, rape of Nanking or suchlike and you can bet your ass troop movements in Pakistan are so closely monitored there will be near misses in the skies above the Swat valley. They're a bastion of freedom compared to North Korea.

Religious freedom and free speech isn't exactly working out too well in the states with Fox preaching sedition and oxycontin crazed hillbillys panting for rapture with combat weapons. Not that a bunch of orange robed draft dodgers with gongs compares to Fred Phelps. Why doesn't the Dali Lama move to China and cooperate with the government, isn't he meant to be a twig in the stream or somesuch.

I may be a bit anti religious but it's due to being Irish, as a people we've had more than our quota of shitheads invoking invisible friends and getting everyone killed.

@Ponder

You're not seriously suggesting that buddhist brainwashing and wheel worship is preferable to education. "Spirituality" might be all very well for backpacking tourists but it's a huge retarding lie in reality. Does the knuckledragging attempt to not teach evolution in Texas inspire you to cry out against state oppression, or is it only cute when in a mountainous region. The "spiritual" aspects of tibetan buddhism are stolen from the much older Bon religion which is being crushed out of existence by the dali lama and his violent thugs in the interests of Tibetan religious unity. Irritating facts generally screw with the lies of religious types.

The reason the Chinese system seems so "harsh" is because of the constant attempts by the US to destroy the country by supporting any kind of dissent in much the same way as the Libertas political party has been set up by two pentagon employees (in their spare time of course) to attempt to disrupt the EU. The US NED funds the Venezuelan opposition party. If it wasn't for attempts to subvert the Chinese system they wouldn't have to be so hard faced but they are left with no alternative.

Of course you're free to believe in the religion which has declared Steven Segal to be a Tulpa or reincarnation of a holy monk, it just shouldn't be a form of government.

USAF raygun boffins clocking planet-buster asteroid threats

That's a relief

Seeing as in the 1950's they set off a nuke 300 miles up it shouldn't be that hard to reprogram an ICBM to just go straight up and blow the shit out of an asteroid when it was 500 miles up or more. Turning it into a giant cloud of crap burning in the atmosphere would be better than a huge chunk of rock blasting through a tectonic plate.

Eurofighter Tranche 3: Oh please, God, no

I have an idea

Why not just drop big bags on money on the enemy forces. A bomb might kill or injure a few but a couple of hundred thousand euro would cause chaos. It would also be cheaper than all this military industrial complex wankfestology.

iPhone users to walk and read at same time

Congratulations

There just aren't enough reviews with the word dogshit in the first sentence. It's could be a very good idea which looks like bullshit, like the button on my dect phone base which allows me to find the handset, worthless until you use it. On the other hand it could thin out the herd of apple dupes which definitely is a good idea.

VeriChip shaves 3mm off human RFID chips

Great

No more getting the wrong meds and fucking dying what a really good idea above and beyond simpleminded politics.

Home Office to keep innocent DNA samples

Now they see it

In case any of you english types were ever confused as to why any country would ever wish to leave the great and wonderful english empire, you may now be seeing it.

NASA gets cold feet on Moon base plan

No need for the primitive

Just because a bunch of dudes caulked up a caravan and managed to get there and back hardly qualifies as doing the job, otherwise Top Gear would be making cruise liners as a sideline. Designs from the sixties using obsolete materials and slide rules would be no use today, it'd be akin to using the empire state building as a template for all skyscrapers.

The work done by the Russians over the years on rocket engines, design and materials combined with the field testing done on Mir, Skylab and the ISS along with advances in materials and CAD allows us to build structures which have been verified to last for years in space rather than a long weekend.

" "Fusion reactors"? Did I blink and miss the landmark experiement that proves it is

possible to get a positive energy flow from a sustained fusion reaction? Odd, I'm normally all over that sort of thing."

You should have paid more attention:

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=1996321846673788606

The Jules Verne passed all tests with flying colours. It's human rated and the rocket it was launched on is also human rated so all it needs is some seats and the EU has the wherewithal to build an orbital station composed of several of these modules and a docking junction. Due to the thrusters on each module the station could be in orbit around the Earth or the Moon.

There is no point whatsoever in going to Mars, it's a poxy wasteland with gravity and an atmosphere. It's three months or more flying time away. Discovering some bacteria or lichen under a rock after ten years of hideously expensive searching followed by the lame headline "We are not alone!" in the Sun is hardly inspiring. The moon is relatively close to home, no atmosphere, sod all gravity, water, plenty of h3 and an endless supply of building materials for bases, probes or ships. Launching using mag lev slingshots is easy when you can use superconductors in vacuum and 1/6th gravity.

The US is bankrupt, maybe the new owners will be interested in space maybe they'll be distracted renaming the various states after Chinese heroes and legends. Either way the EU and Russia should work together to get a moonbase or two up and running.

USAF slammed for pranging Predators on manual

hUbriS

class warfare has no tradition in the US

Yeah they just do what the rich tell them every single time.

Torture case against Boeing subsidiary resuscitated

@miami Dunce

You're lucky the censorship on el reg has gotten way out of hand and my previous post was removed for some unknown reason.

Yorkshire man wakes up Irish after brain surgery

@@The flemish slur

The Flemish are (drumroll please) swamp-Germans. Ay thank yew, thank yew. I believe that little remark will get you stabbed in most parts of the Nederlands.

@Gav You must be a wikipeado applying half-baked reason to facts resulting in a "reasonable compromise" which is in fact a lie. It's the sort of faux-reasoning which conspiracy nuts thrive on and it's the reason many wikipedia articles are complete garbage. Blessed be the cheesemakers.

@Niall

Absofuckinglutely, the only song you'll never hear in Ireland.

Obviously the Yorkshireman thought he'd died and gone to a better place where he could have his hearts desire, to be promoted to Irish and within those hallowed ranks to be a Dubliner the most exalted of all Irishmen. Sadly it was not to be and after a half hour of bliss he returned from being a citizen to a subject. Either that or bagpuss went back to sleep.

ARIN heads off IP address land grab

It's nonsense

Get a few of the clowns who hold class A blocks to hand them back, DEC and HP have one each which they no longer need.

Sheep ad not cruel, bleats Samsung

@Jamie

Greenpeace are not "worst"[sic] than PETA I think you've confused knuckledragging with righteous indignation.

Steve Jobs: 'I wanted respect, not backdated options'

@sleepy

Wake up you dolt. He's a criminal and the only "politics" as you like to call it is that the scumbag isn't in gaol. Slackjawed accountants and psychoytic bosses breaking laws is what US business failure is all about. From the criminals at enron to the criminals at apple. Just because the Apple board agrees with Jobs doesn't stop the behaviour from being criminal it just makes it a conspiracy.

As for the remarks by AC above why not choke to death earting some Malthus. That someone could actually type in something so pathetic is a tribute to PETA.

Private ID scans leave fetish club-goers feeling exposed

No Fat Chicks

Put a damn weighing scales at the door and no one would complain.

Revealed: Mega City One's top e-car - according to Peugeot

Prog 1631

Oh holy shit I remember buying issue 1 as a bairn for 6p or 3p of course the Kaiser had stolen the word for beetroot so we had to call it volgan cabbage...

HP ScanJet 3C takes lead on Bohemian Rhapsody

Bravo

Screw Toshiba's fiddle playing tin can.

Google accused of UK tax dodge

Thanks for the money suckers

You'll find that every Microsoft product sold in EMEA is sold from Ireland also Oracle and IBM.

Oracle reels in Sun Microsystems with $7.4bn buy

Fuck

Goodbye Sun, at least it'll take Oracle down so it's not all bad.

Recession takes chunk out of game sales

Tripe

As an actual computerhead the wii is the best of the bunch followed by the PS3, the xbox 360 is a piece of shit in every overheating way possible. Get a wii if you have an old telly and aren't upgrading just yet. If you have a spanking new HD hdmi TV there's no better device to hook up t o it than a PS3.

If you like overheating pieces of phenomenally ugly unreliability get an xbox 360, probably two for when one is busted. Wi fi isn't an extra add on it's a necessity.

Homeless Frank and Microsoft's cookie-cutter PC campaign

Yuk yuk yuk

I'd still rather kill myself than buy a piece of shit proprietary rip off mac. It's not really the hardware it's the scum who use them.

Doc invents videogame sedation headset

Good oh

Where can I get refills?

DARPA AI will trawl petabytes of UAV vid for enemy cows

God in heaven

"Will see horses, deduce existence of evil cattle"

Give that man a medal.

Cable-cutting vandals disconnect Silicon Valley

Great

Now maybe some slackjawed IT managers can be fired for having no backup comms links. Just how amateur can they be.

Also any tool who actually uses SyFy should be killed FYI.

Obama & Gates vs the US military-industrial complex

Ha ha ha

I hope the US keeps wasting money on bullshit weapons and cutting it's education. I might buy somewhere over there as a summer home and I'll need servants.

Hugh Jackman speaks of Wolverine leak heartbreak

Khan!

A serious crime would be where an able bodied man makes an enormous fortune pretending to be a cartoon character in order to take money from children and the mentally crippled. This would be more a case of bitchslapping a bunch of rapacious crooks.

Animal rights group protests seal clubbing in World of Warcraft

Wowank

Can someone set up an event where people can torture and vivisect members of PETA. I despise the very idea of WoW but I'd gladly shell up the bread to get a chance to use my vegan pliers.

MPs battle to save great British pub

Parasites

Bemoaning the death of the pubs is like whining about pimps not being able to bring in slaves from eastern Europe. The scum who sell overpriced piss poor beer to children and pensioners alike should have been bulldozed years ago. It's a pleasure to see them going under and hopefully see a decline in families ruined by the bastards.

Workplace dispute laws change today

About time

The sooner the tug the forelock thankee boss attitude is done away with the better. The uhmerican attitude of kissing the bosses feet for allowing you to work is all very well if you're just an american but in the civilised world we're brighter than that. If the boss isn't making more money from an employee than he's paying out the company won't be round for long.

At the same time all the rights given to chicksa these days makes them practically impossible to hire.

French pass 'three strikes' file-sharing law

Midgets are a bad business

Napoleon now sarkozy, how long before the shortarsed racist declares himself emperor.

Bucks village repels Street View spycar

Zap them

Broughton should be removed from maps, google earth, and streetview and replaced by a nice tight closeup of goatse.

Man gets life for killing game-obsessed partner

How considerate

As a GTA4 addict it's how she would have wanted to go.

Linux chief calls for FAT-free Microsoft diet

Ballmer is the worlds baldest twat

About malaria curing Bill and his deeds, opinions varied. When it comes to the inbred and uncouth red faced buffoon currently destroying the huge corporation the wise course of action has to be dump MS as fast as possible. The tantrum and chair throwing imbecile managed to produce MeII because he prefers to shout at people rather than do business. As Public Enemy once said "Motherfuck him and John Wayne too".