* Posts by Mark Roome

86 publicly visible posts • joined 25 Jun 2007

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Bubbly billygoat-bursting boffinry brouhaha at MoD

Mark Roome

Come on guys

Surely there are enough pestilent animals in the world (Cats and frogs come to mind from recent Reg reading) to not have too many animal rights activists going crazy.

I mean really.

Isn't he really just trying to get your goat?

North American cities go green under LED street lights

Mark Roome

Poor salmon

I hope they are up to it.

Non-LED Flashing coat thanks.

3,000 chickens paralyse central Scotland

Mark Roome

Let me get it over with, the rest of you can just show the response

Why did the chicken(s) cross the road?

Jihadi-sniffers blame White House for leaking secrets

Mark Roome

Sorry guys

But thats not the real man from mars.

the real guy has all small letters, this is just a copy cat dude trying to be funny

Nanny agency hacking suspect cuffed

Mark Roome

Re: RIAA

and definately no ... KARAOKE either ....

but wait, that should be banned ANYWAY, never in all my life have I ever heard such bad singing, not even on Idols. And its doubly embarrasing to watch your drunks bosses singing it .... although it is good for a few .. laughs when you have it on video later.

.Asia domains are go

Mark Roome

for sci-fi

www.fant.asia

Yahoo! Teams! With! eBay! And! PayPal! To! End! Phishing!

Mark Roome

Anon

I love the way the anonymous postings have gone from Anon to Anoymous to Anonymous Vulture to Anonymous Coward .....

whats next?

iPod Nano in airport trouser conflagration horror

Mark Roome

At least ...

he doesn't appear to be TRYING to start an apple/ipod flame war...

IGMC

Utah gives up new dino species

Mark Roome

Re: Walking with Dinosaurs

Some of us just have more silicon than others I guess.

Skin, Club, Dinosaur!!

Mark Roome

Facts, we want facts!

There are simply not enough facts in this article.

300 - 800 teeth is about the only thing there. How many double decker busses big was it? How many furloughs per fortnight could it run?

Spammers target hamsters after Ig Nobel winning research

Mark Roome

The Reg

Did El Reg not get any awards for finding out important things like the speed of sheep in a vacuum or who is the toughest ever (CN!)?

Teeny tiny ozone hole for 2007

Mark Roome

@Dave : Ozone Quantity

Ok, Dave, I'll bite.

There is NO Ozone in the hole, because, um, its a hole!

You should really get a taxi now, you have no right to even get your coat. :)

US men wrangle over three-year-old amputated leg

Mark Roome

Pull the other one ...

or not, as it isn't attached.

Wood is just trying to get a foot in the door on the money making scheme.

I'll get my coat and crutches.

Kiwi boffins prove that booze makes you clever

Mark Roome

Re: @Luther Blissett

Is that after they upgrade from logo?

@Tim Greenwood: I am glad I am not the only one who is a Cliff and Norm fan. Norms beer gags are still the best, I have a list of them somewhere, I must dig them out.

Pentagon claims missile-defence success

Mark Roome

AV

Anonymous Vulture, are you for real? You post, then comment on your own posts, then comment on those comments? Seriously, this must be easily one of the longest conversations between one person that I have seen in ages. I thought I was a little odd talking to mayself, but at least I don't answer myself back.

So, what's the first rule of Reg Club?

Mark Roome

Quote

Often have obscure quotes and references to Terry Pratchett, Douglas Adams, Larry Niven or any other sci-fi/fantasy author or movie because or course all IT people have read or are busy reading them.

LAPD patrol cars to get sticky-GPS-tracker cannon?

Mark Roome

"Jammers, sticky, zap and shooting things"

"Lord Helmut, they just jammed the radar!"

"What! Tell me what happened"

"Well, first it was going 'Blip, Blip, Blip' ... then SPLAT .. then it was going 'shshshshshshshshshshshshs'"

"Raspberry jam!, There's only one... man who would dare give me the raspberry: LONESTARR!"

(Thats from Spaceballs, just in case you didn't get it)

Young hearts roam free on UK cellco network

Mark Roome

Re: "Blyk"

Thats SOUFF Efrika actually, having come from there, and its sevis. But otherwise a very good try :)

Space makes germs more deadly

Mark Roome

Colonisation all over again

So, say we DO eventually meet some freindly aliens (or even no so freindly), the same thing is going to happen to them as did the Native Americans or the Native Africans or the Native Natives ... ie getting almost wiped out by flu, chicken pox et al.

Top US boffin plans jizz-based LEDs

Mark Roome

Where is the obligatory comments ...

I have restrained myself for a number of days, but I cannot anymore!

Surely it would be better to use whale sperm? I sure it would go a whole lot further.

T-Mobile penetrates Virgin Islands

Mark Roome

Re: Cracking title

That is indeed a great title, I also thought it was one of Lesters.

We may have to watch this Cade Metz fellow

Boffins challenge shape of neutron neutrality

Mark Roome

In the words of Calvin ...

"I like to say 'Quark'! Quark Quark Quark."

Venezuelan man survives autopsy

Mark Roome

Deathwatch

Thats exactly why they started having a deathwatch in the old days, because people they thought were dead weren't, so sometimes they used to set up strings down to the coffinsconnected to bells and have someone up-top spend the night at the gravesite. Must have been an interesting night.

Blind Judo master floors tobacco stealing skinhead

Mark Roome

In the words of ...

Austin Powers: "Judo ... CHOP!"

Reference kilo shows mysterious weight loss

Mark Roome

Standard unit of ...

Shouldn't that be the standard unit of Moss, as in the weight of Kate Moss. Isn't she supposed to be the definition of skinny?

Just my 2 cents worth

Dolphins abandon Bay of Biscay

Mark Roome

gone gone gone

First it was the dolphins in China, now these ... must be a trend ... time almost up for us I am afraid.

Streaking star leaves sweeping tail in its wake

Mark Roome

Sheeposonic

So if a spaceship is traveling at 10 lightyears per second, and the sheep in the spacesheep is traveling at 10 kilometers per hour, how fast is the sheep traveling?

NASA: no fix needed for shuttle

Mark Roome

In space ...

Isn't there another teacher on this trip? A replacement for the last one? I could be mistaken though.

In space, no-one can hear you scream!

Sapce-suit~ Air-lock~

Australia declares war on net porn

Mark Roome

Re: Public Health System

Ian, I thought it had changed to "mouse finger" from too much clicking .... ?

Coat? Whats that?

We'll never get alien telly, says Zagreb boffin

Mark Roome

In the words of my favourite cartoon character, Calvin:

"Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us."

Jordan names sprog 'Princess Tiaamii'

Mark Roome

people people peopl

Re: Ransden Gnomefumbler - I think that is the best one I have read in ages

Re: Lester Haines - I love reading your articels almost as much as I love reading the comments to your articels. Somehow, no matter what you do you mange to get a wide variety of people who either love or hate your articles, all wiling to comment. When it is IT related, you get slated, when there is no IT angle, you get slated. At least you are famous :)

German hurls computer from apartment block

Mark Roome

It's a classic case ...

of drag-and-drop functionality.

Just DRAG your computer over to the window and DROP it out.

QED

Wikipedia clarifies steam pipe menace

Mark Roome

Re: Re: Sometimes explode

Hey Michael

A freind of mine was doing a technical course where they had to write an app (way back when they did these things) which could read the mouse movements. The only problem was that instead of receiving info from the mouse he tried to "send" info to the mouse. The result? Blue smoke - and before he could unplug it, an exploding mouse.

This shows us 2 thing:

1. Mice can explode

2. Blue smoke is bad

US wants trucks mounted with frikkin' laser beams

Mark Roome

Missing the ... point?

The question on my mind is this .. what if they miss? So the alleged bomb is flying in front of the moon or any one of the hundreds of satelites we have in orbit around the earth, not to mention a fair number of civilian planes up in the sky. Surely the potential to hit one of these is pretty high, and what would the consequences of that be?

Sick to death of the bloody iPhone? Click here

Mark Roome

Paris vs iPhone

mmmm some interestng comments here ...

If the iPhone is the Paris of the technology world, what would be the equivalent "reward" for Paris .. is there a blender that we could fit her into ...?

probably not all that politically correct I am sure ... but this is the Reg agter all

BOFH: Printer cartridge? What printer cartridge?

Mark Roome

Re: Anyone notice....

There are more that just those episodes missing, 13 and 1 are also ... misplaced

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