Posts by John Tserkezis

2 out of 3 Android apps use private data 'suspiciously'

It smells like... like... bullshit.

If the study doesn't name names, the study ain't worth shit.

Saying that "There are no guarantees apps for Apple's iPhone or Research in Motion's Blackberry would fare any better if subjected to the same scrutiny" does nothing if they haven't actually BEEN put under the same scutiny.

Till that happens, it serves as scaremongering against Android, and perhaps lead the market towards Apple or RIM on the basis that Security By Obscurity is a good thing. Or maybe that what you don't know won't hurt you...

I on the other hand see this as first class, complete and absolute, full up and down, grade A bullshit.

And I'm not buying it.

Anti-piracy lawyers' email database leaked after hack

As the saying goes..

"Privacy International said on Monday that it plans to sue ACS:Law for violating the privacy of internet users over the security breach"

Those who live by the sword, die by the sword.

Gotta love it!

Oracle finally outlines roadmap for mobile Java

It was good while it lasted.

They're using the words "Oracle", "Mobile" and "Experience" in the same sentence.

I know wank words when I see them. This can't be good.

Kindle users finally get to pay for games

Oh great.

As if it wasn't bad enough that Apple turds can't resist playing games on their iPhones on my daily train commute. Now the Kindle brigade (clearly bored with reading books) are going to join them too.

Apple in 873-page legal claim to word 'Pod'

JMP @ Is "Pad" next?JMB

It's already been done:

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2010/04/13/jobs_claims_pad_trademark/

Perhaps he should take "fanboi" and be done with it. After all, it's his idiot fans that keep buying all this pod and pad rubbish.

Ten... iPhone 4 accessories

Come on really, you've forgotten a couple more gadgets...

Firstly, a strip of tape to insulate the antennas, and a jailbreak kit designed for the average joe.

Those two things should make the iPhone 4 merely useful, verses, well, useless.

What? Too soon?

DWP's Harley tops government CIO pay list

Complaints?

Let's see how well the PM functions as an IT manager...

They tried their hand here in Australia, and think it's a good idea to create a fibre to the home network at x5+ the cost it was done in other countries.

Then they invent a super secret internet filter that removes normal porn, casino sites and R rating games sites (as well as a dentist just in case he tried something funny).

Seriously, if a corporate flavoured IT manager tried that here, he'd find his brake lines cut courtesy of their local BOFH.

Fanboys flabbergasted by 'Apple TV runs iOS' revelation

Why is everyone so amazed that the Apple TV runs iOS?

Because Apple fanbois get excited over little things like that.

If Apple made burgers, and Steve Jobs *personally* spat in every fourth burger, there would be rioting in the streets over who would get into the shops first.

Like homer says about the KrustyBurgers: "Hmm I like those odds!"

'Unicorn' captured in remote Laos mountain forests

Good to see the human domination project coming along.

If it ain't human, kill it.

For that matter, if IS human, kill it anyway just in case.

4chan launches DDoS against entertainment industry

How many wrongs does it take to make a right?

Three apparently. :-)

Undiplomatic tweet from French diplomats

Measures? What measures?

"The tweet has gone now and been replaced with a message which said the @francediplo account had been hacked, the message had been erased and measures taken to ensure it did not happen again."

Measures? So the "1234" password was not so secure after all?

Facebook Places checks in to UK

I can only see good things come of this.

For Facebook.

Everyone else can get screwed.

And deservedly - when the creator calls you a f*cking idiot, and you still come back for more, I mean it *is* Facebook after all.

O2 shocks customers by slashing iPad data allowance

You signed for it, you have only yourself to blame...

"30-day rolling contracts"?

That's akin to a blank cheque. What did the idiot users THINK was going to happen?

A quarter of Americans using mobile apps

What I'd *really* like to see...

Is a study of downloaders' IQ verses class of app they buy.

Can I guess the obvious, that farting apps would attract IQs that are comparable with their age?

Yahoo! boffin scores pi's two quadrillionth bit

Even easier!

> I worked it out with a pencil, like all good mathematicians.

> It's 4.

> Prove me wrong!

Sure, it's 3. The convention (unless otherwise specified) is to round down for decimals up to .4, and round up at .5 and higher.

Since it's already been established that pi to one decimal place is 3.1 (look it up if you don't believe me), it rounds to 3.

Do I get a prize for this?

Bugger that, I'm getting a beer.

Mobile phones for minimalists

ahem

It beats the early iPhone (without the cut/copy/paste functionality) in that it supplies a pen.

And no, I'm not ever going to let them live that one down.

Still think the screen is too small. I can hear the "where's my glasses" again...

Yahoo! 'handicaps' its search ad auctions

Don't see that flying for long

I recall some car game on an early archade system for two players, that penalised the faster car, giving a chance to the, ahem, loser.

That's not how real life works. In real life, if you make an error, you wear that error, and hope the leading car makes an equally stupid error. Otherwise, you lose, plain and simple.

This yahoo method will ensure one thing and one thing only. The crap that doesn't sell (presumably because it's crap) will now sell.

This is not a good thing.

Mozambique blocked rioters' texts

Sure...

"The prices shot up thanks to lack of rain in Russia and excessive rain in Canada."

Those had everything to do with the rise in petrol and power I bet...

When govco rorts its people - who can ill afford in the first place - what did they *think* was going to happen?

Perhaps they thought if their people can afford phones, they can afford the higher price of bread.

Or, if not, get rid of the phones.

Perhaps govco thought they were doing their people a favour?

Microsoft: IE9 will never run on Windows XP

Oh really?

"You don't want to differentiate on HTML5 - [as a coder] I want to be able to write this mark up once and it runs across all browsers,"

After what they've done to HTML1,2,3, & 4, it's rich coming from them...

Police spent tens of thousands on failed BitTorrent probe

"Police spent tens of thousands on failed BitTorrent probe"

What, did they run out of drug dealers to chase?

Or was it cheaper to fruitlessly chase a software pirate, rather than lose a couple of kilos of coke in a deal that goes nowhere?

Playboy centrefold freaks out at 10,000 feet

Anxiety attacks aren't about logic.

Having suffered them myself on and off for years, I can tell you, logic is the last thing on your mind.

So while I can't blame her entirely for that in particular...

On the other hand, not travelling with your meds? Stupid.

Kinda like blaming your actions on your being drunk, when you had to be perfectly sober to start drinking in the first place...

Cheers. :-)

Smartbook done to death by Apple iPad

People are idiots.

Let's get things straight. Apple didn't kill the tablet, it was already dead.

Tablets died in the 90's a natural death. It appears people didn't want them anymore.

Now, Apple thought it could bring them back, entirely through marketing.

And some other idiot manufacturers thought they'd try to get on the bandwagon too.

Ones who should know better...

Turns out, people weren't interested after all.

Shock horror. I'm surprised that anyone is surprised it didn't die sooner.

Cinema chain bans laptops, tablets

Ahh, the cinema industry marketing types, bless their hearts.

They're just trying to make a buck, even if they only do have two brain cells left...

Banning laptops, although misguided, is almost understandable, but have a listen to what they've tried here in Australia in the past (and failed miserably).

In our sunday papers, there's a regular cinema section where they advertise what's playing, and their time schedules. They canned that, for a 1900 paid-for phone dial up service, so you have to fiddle with some moron who can't set up an automated system. And pay for it dearly too.

Of course, only having two brain cells, means they forgot their web sites do the same job better, and it's free.

Needless to say normal programming was resumed after they wondered why their patronage dropped off.

Another was when they banned outside food from being brought in. Though, you could still purchase THEIR food and drink at the usual outrageosly inflated prices. How thoughtful of them.

Again, after noticing people didn't visit them as frequently as usual, they canned that idea too.

Don't be too hard on them, they do after all do their best on two brain cells.

iPhone finds its Google Voice

Three times?!

Who in their right minds pays for essencially the same app three times just so it "keeps working"?

Then again, we are talking about Apple fanbois.

(where is that rotten apple with a worm poking it's head out icon?)

Google Instant sinks raft of search controls

Their marketing team should be shot.

It has more recently been publicised that it is not available in Australia, "yet".

Yet I've seen it, and have indeed used some of the suggestions in the past couple of months.

But they've broken it again till it's "officially" released here.

So, as per usual, we're good enough to test something, but not good enough to deploy.

Even the workaround www.google.com/ncr re-directs to the more usual google.com.au/.

Really, do they go on training courses to learn how to piss off their users?

Apple issues moral regulations apps dev guide

What?!

What if I want to develop a better farting app than what's already out there??

Craigslist blocks US escort ads

Won't make a squat of difference...

Like any attempt at censorship, no matter how well-meaning, it won't do squat.

Long before this, I heard most if not the majority were "worded" in a manner that prospective clients knew, but a casual look doesn't raise any questions. Much like a drug user can point out sellers at their local shopping mall, but the casual shoppers wouldn't have noticed at all.

Google's Schmidt satirised as privacy pervert

The problem with Do Not [whatever] Lists...

...is that they don't actually do anything.

Oz school in homosexual kookaburra rumpus

Good luck with that.

"I wasn't trying to insult gay people."

You should have thought of that back when you joined the Politically Correct bandwagon, in your attempt to not insult gay people.

With your current actions, you've insulted gays anyway, and it's in the media so EVERYONE knows about it, and you end up looking like a right tool.

They did the same thing with the Australian National Anthem. Tools.

It's alive! Duke Nukem Forever breaks out of vapour trail

Just another cynical response.

I won't be holding my breath.

I'll wait for the release time for people to say it either doesn't have a map builder, or it's a cost extra.

I'll wait for them to say the Australian version will be sanitised to hell (like the fuckers did the last time).

I'll wait for them to say you need a constant internet connection to make the thing work.

I'll wait for the cracked version to appear two weeks later, before I don't bother downloading that either.

Bah, who cares. I'm all over it.

HMRC issues CD-rom alert to employers

Am I missing something?

Forgive me, but I'm a mere Australian, but boiled down, it's a story about a firm that is advising its users to upgrade to the latest version. Er, big deal?

The ONLY thing that would make this newsworthy is if the HMRC is noted for not updating software at all. Heck, even here in australia we get a bunch of accounting softwares that update with our Australian Taxation Office ruling changes every year, and manage to do that on time without fanfare.

I must be missing something.

iTunes update plugs WebKit flaw

Security vulnerability?

Isn't iTunes a security vulnerability in itself?

Yes yes, I'm going...

US undergrads crash NASA satellite into Arctic

A good thing I suppose...

It's one rare instance where you can claim that you were directly responsible for the crash and burn on your resume, and it be a good thing...

Survey scammers serve up supposed shelter from survey scams

And the problem is?

Scammers are moving from email to social networking sites...

Fine with me!

Microsoft wins wants right to appeal Word patent ruling

Didn't I say this in another thread?

Once there's no-one left, the patent trolls will go after each other.

Soon after, they'll disappear up the vacuum of their own arses.

Good riddance, I don't care, I'll be at the pub.

Apple QuickTime backdoor creates code-execution peril

Beep,Beep,Beep - BREAKING NEWS

Apple writes backdoor into their software.

Journalist actually surprised.

VW to eliminate worst road hazard: drivers

Not going to happen.

In 20 years time, liquid or gasseous fuel, or electricity will be so expensive, that no-one but the elite would be able to afford it.

And by that stage, collision avoidance had better be advanced enough, because the super-fast cars will need some way to avoid the remainder of the population who's fallen back to using horses and fucking bulls to do their towing.

Paul Allen launches patent broadside on world+dog

Oh never mind, it doesn't matter anyway.

The patent trolls will feed off the innovators (or at the very least the ones who try to innovate).

When there are no innovators left, they'll feed of each other (your patent infringes on my patent).

And when the number of trolls reaches critical mass, they'll get sucked into the vacuum of their own arses and vanish altogether.

By that stage, the true owners of the earth, bacteria (they were here when the earth started, and they'll the be only ones left when our sun goes nova) will take over the earth. And any remaining lawers...

And I for one, welcome our new bacterial overlords....

Boffins build lie detector for crooked CEOs

Do I have to be the one?

"You're fucking holding it wrong".

Google unleashes phone calls from Gmail

Phew!

"If Google started noticing there's a world beyond America too. Google Voice, Google Calls, Google almost everything else - unavailable outside the U.S."

I for one am glad that Australia IS NOT treated like a beta test site for subsequent world-wide releases. It gets pretty frustrating when we're fed the latest gadgets, firmware and software, except that they're almost always is broken in some way.

Apple to reveal musical something on September 1

Yawn.

That is all.

Google Nexus One 'too popular' in dev phone afterlife

Shock horror.

Phone sells better in unlocked state, rather than forcing users on costly contract.

Who would have thought?

Exiting workers more likely to steal data than stationery

There IS comparison...

"If I take a stapler, I am depriving the company of the stapler. It's probably theft.

If I take a copy of some data, the company loses nothing. It's definitely not theft."

Oh but it can be. If the company spends two years work on obtaining, collating, calculating or otherwise collecting that data (intellectual property) and you either hand it out to a competitor, (or they get the data via other means), you've saved the competitor two years worth of work.

This also means the company where the data originated, now has lost any lead they had compared to their competitors. The market might start buying from the competitors, rather than the origin.

Putting a number on this can vary widely, depending on circumstances and who you're dealing with, this could translate to millions. Or it might go no-where. Either way, I assure you, if you get caught, you will NOT be the one making the determination that it cost no-one anything.

Personally, all the bits and bytes in the world can't staple my pages together, so, in my case, thanks, I'll just take the stapler.

PA school district avoids charges over webcam spy scandal

As a general rule,

I rebuild computers/laptops etc as I get them. Format the bitch and start again from scratch.

I don't trust normal vendors, what makes you thing I'm going to trust the board of education?

Google spanked for bidding on its own ad auctions

I don't quite see the fuss?

Television networks do this all the time, they litter their advertising space with self advertisments of their own programs and such.

However, I won't be fooled into thinking they're anything other than just that : Just more bloody ads.

Either way with me, I flter Goolge ads, and don't watch television outside of a PVR, so I don't get ads in the first place. Not in the way THEY want to deliver them to me anyway.

For all the anti-freetards out there, screw you. I'll get my ads in a controlled manner, when I want them, in the manner I want them, on the exact subject I'm interested in. Not when some marketing retard thinks it's a good time for me to get them.

So there, deal with it.

Shopping mall mulls Supreme Court bid to back no-speaking ban

Legal yes, Stupid, also yes.

On your property you can make up any rules (policies) you like as long as they don't contravene established state, federal, international, whatever etc laws.

A shopping centre here in Australia a couple of years ago created a policy that you're not allowed to wear thongs (the australian rubber footwear flipflop type thongs), while using the escalators (the moving stairway thingies).

They had legal right to ask and/or force you to leave if you insisted on using the escalators with thongs.

We speculated they only did that to satisfy a discount on their legal liability premiums in case someone's loose footware was to jam within the jaws of death and lose a foot...

They were very much within legal rights to do that. They were also very stupid to try it too.

It lasted barely a month.

Police slam internet justice - then use it themselves

Hmm

Do as we say, not as we do.

Erg. Where have I heard that before?

Google's Inventor gets short shrift

Oh dear...

When you take an otherwise complex process, and you try to simplify things down to the point that any layman can understand, you get schlock software that doesn't work.

All the good programming practices we've learned go out the window, forget about maintenance, making sense of the mess for bugfixes and the likelyhood of updates vanish since if the "programmer" didn't want to go to the trouble of even learning a pretend programming language, what makes you think they're going to bother actually improving their original mess?

You've heard about "make something idiot proof, and someone will find a better idiot", heck, this just INVITES idiots.

Can replication replace backup?

Just my 2c worth

Without arguing replication and backup, as already stated they're two different things, I really need to give my 2c worth regarding using the cloud as an alternative.

I wouldn't, and you're going to have a hard time convincing me it's a good idea.

Firstly, if the cloud target isn't your own equipment, you can't trust it. I don't care who says what, since we have no control over their data storage, we have no guarantee it's going to be secure.

If it *IS* your own, then you need to pay for and manage that too.

Also, unless you have an encrypted tunnel to the target, again, as far as security goes, it's free for all.

And tell me why, that once you mention "cloud", people somehow manage to forget their ISP data costs are going rise dramatically.

Put those three points together, and dollar for dollar, tape looks good.

Sheeze. And people wonder why.

Hackers spoof car warning system

Easy to fix...

Firstly, a screwdriver through the alarm speaker (if you haven't already gotten sick of it endlessly fucking beeping while your door is open), then, a bit of black marker over the dash obscuring the warning light.