Posts by Semper Phoenix

Microsoft forges One Teams App To Rule Them All

"New" Teams = New Coke

The "New" versions of Microsoft applications are backwards steps. They reduce the levels of functionality from the "old" / "classic" versions. For example, New Outlook looks and feels like Outlook Web. New Teams makes me re-pin things every single day, and won't let me see two areas within the same organisation in the same navigation pane. No, I have to select which one I want and stick with it. Micro$quash (pace Berkeley Breathed) are mushrooming its user base, whom it clearly regards as infants.

Google looking outside the usual channels to fix security skills gap

Hoop jumping

Out of curiosity, I had look at the application process for the 6 months scholarship program, being a woman in IT. Not only is registration on the sans.org website obligatory, but then they also require that you register with the Cyversity website.

This alarmed me a little, as the two options are Professional, or Student. Professional means forking over $100 per year.

Anyway, after jumping through hoops, a link for a 50 question (2 hour) assessment is e-mailed to you, to complete within 5 days.

I'll let you know what happens when I complete the assessment....

UK chemicals multinational to build hydrogen 'gigafactory'

Where are our "Mr Fusion" reactors from 2015?

We're now seven years past when Doc Brown took Marty & Jennifer to 2015. Where are all our Mr Fusion reactors, providing 1.21 GW of power?

Ok, yes, I know Mr Fusion powered the flux capacitor, not the DeLorean itself; But surely some clever engineers could come up with a way of hooking up the Mr Fusion reactors, so that we don't have to plug in electric / hybrid vehicles to charge their batteries any longer?!

BOFH: The vengeance bus is coming, and everybody's jumping. An Xmas bonus hits me…

Bravo, Simon :)

Oh Simon, thank you :) I didn't take you for a man who was in to the Vengaboys (unless it's an El Reg editor titivating the title and caressing the caption). Well done for not losing the upper hand over Stephen the Pimply-Faced "Youth" :) Always be your bastard self, please :)

The server is down, money is not being made, and you want me to fix what?

coughs gently *Ahem*

Oh, Richard? Can you please correct "whinging", to "whingeing"? Thank you :)

Mine's the duffel with the dead tree dictionary in the pocket....

Not content with distorting actual reality, Facebook now wants to build a digital layer for the world

Ah, Douglas, how we miss thee....

His Joo Janta 200 Super-Chromatic Peril Sensitive Sunglasses come to mind....

https://hitchhikers.fandom.com/wiki/Joo_Janta_200_Super-Chromatic_Peril_Sensitive_Sunglasses

Whoa-o BlackBerry, bam-ba-lam: QWERTY phone had a child. 5G thing's newly styled

A 2nd Alt key?

Enquiring minds want to know (ok, me; still using my antiquated 2012 BB Curve) if the new BB will have a 2nd Alt key, on the righthand side of the keyboard?

What do you call megabucks Microsoft? No really, it's not a joke. El Reg needs you

Berkeley Breathed...

...christened them MicroSquash, in Bloom County / Outland.

I like the idea of homaging the Kaleds, especially because then fun can be hand with Davros / Davos. But more so for changing "EXTERMINATE" to "DEFENESTRATE" :) Or Skaro?

Mayday! Mayday! The next Windows 10 update is finally on approach to a PC near you

What tweaks to Notepad?

Richard? What have Micro$quash done to the Notepad?

TensorFlow gets its quantum of solace, lid lifted on 'all-seeing crime-detecting' AI upstart, and more

"EDM music"?

Really? Electronic Dance Music music.... *smh* :(

Be still, our drinking hearts: Help Reg name whisky beast conjured by Swedish distillers and AI blendbot

Valcohol (Valhalla + alcohol)....

… Mjölner mjölk :)

That Old Time 2018 IT songbook: Verity, Verity - give us your lyrics, do! We're half crazy, all for the love of you

Brava! Encore :)

Patent quality has fallen, confirm Euro examiners

Re: How the EU will deal with this...

Shurely, Farage's Maxim (not that Nige deserves the honour of being immortalised like Godwin)?!

A smartphone recession is coming and animated poo emojis can't stop it

Not looking forward to next phone

For my sins, when my much loved Nokia needed replacing in 2012, I opted for a BlackBerry (work related reasons). If had I realised that the wretched thing only had an Alt key on *one* side of its keyboard, I wouldn't have done so. Now its battery is pants, understandably, and WhatsApp no longer support RIM's outdated BlackBerry OS. I can't afford an Apple X and grudgingly concede next phone will need to be an Android (not so much for evil Google, but 'cos of feminist linguist reasons). *sigh*

Good news: Apple designs a notebook keyboard that doesn't suck

Wot, no backspace?

Is everyone exhausted from belabouring Cupertino re the whole delete / backspace issue, also?!

Britain ignores booze guidelines – heads for the pub

Re: No safe level of anything

Oo, sitting is terribly lethal also, don'tcha know?! https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/adult-health/expert-answers/sitting/faq-20058005

Careful with the 'virtual hugs' says new FreeBSD Code of Conduct

Berkeley Breathed...

...anticipated this in an early Bloom County, bless him.

https://imgur.com/gallery/eaKNnAt

Paging all Microsoft System Center users: Your treadmill is here

№ 5, № 9, Coco or Gabrielle?

"first Semi-Annual Chanel version of System Centre" - how very fragrant, and haute couture, of MicroSquash ;)

BOFH: CSI Haxploitation Cube Farm Apocalypse

Ninja icon, lack thereof?

Hi Sarah Bee and all at The Reg. Having just completed my re-read of all Simon's work, both here & at http://bofh.ntk.net/index.php, I noticed mention in the fora of a Ninja icon. Is that available only for the Platinum cookie members? Please keep up the splendid work, which has kept me from running amok on a regular basis. Cheers :D