* Posts by BrownishMonstr

535 publicly visible posts • joined 22 May 2011

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We don't mean to poo-poo this, but... The Internet of S**t has literally arrived thanks to Pampers smart diapers

BrownishMonstr

Re: Push Notifications?

Having become a parent, though it feels recent it was a year ago, I have learnt I can get happy seeing my daughter having a shit after days of constipation. A happiness I never knew could fucking exist, but there I was, face full of glee looking at a pile of mustardy, runny shit.

2019 set to be the worst year yet for smartphone market as lack of worthy upgrades dents demand

BrownishMonstr

Re: bought a USED one year old smart phone last year...

On the other hand, by buying old you're restricting yourself to updates, depending on the manuf.

For pity's sake, groans Mimecast, teach your workforce not to open obviously dodgy emails

BrownishMonstr

Re: you could do that, but...

You don't even need a non-smart person, you just need a smart person to have an "Ohfuck" moment.

Industry reps told the UK taxman everything wrong with extending IR35. What happened next will astound you

BrownishMonstr

Re: up to a 20 per cent pay cut overnight... For many, the cost of their current mortgage

IR35 has fucked over the wrong folks. It should be the clients paying this, not the contractors. I bet the Gov are hoping the contractors are gonna do their bidding for them.

BrownishMonstr

Re: up to a 20 per cent pay cut overnight... For many, the cost of their current mortgage

He said "unintentional". The banks should let people have normal mortgages to let, if it isn't for long-term. What happens if you buy a BTL mortgage but only intend to let it for a few years before you move in?

I don't have to save my work, it's in The Cloud. But Microsoft really must fix this files issue

BrownishMonstr

Re: Lets step back a bit

I'm pretty sure you can view previous versions, at least with O365 personal.

Accounts whistleblower blackmailed Autonomy for a payoff, Mike Lynch tells High Court

BrownishMonstr

Re: How much?????

Could be four milli-pounds xxx

Chinese government has got it 'spot on' when it comes to face-recog tech says, er, London's Met cops' top rep

BrownishMonstr

Re: Decisions, Decisions...

You could phrase it as this : if you were in charge of a country and you're suspicious another country would try to take you out of power. What would you do?

To what extent would you infringe your citizens' rights and freedoms to protect the country. You of course think you're running the country the best way you could, the enemy doesn't give a shit about your country, so you should therefore protect the country for its people

Very few people, if any, think themselves as evil, so they feel justified in what they do. Likewise governments will they are doing the best for everyone, as much as the people deserve it. Whether you disagree with them is a matter of opinion. Right and wrong are what we define them to be and they inherently change in time, culture, etc.

Well, I think the OP was talking about that.

Florida man pretending to be police pulls over real police, ends badly, claim cops

BrownishMonstr

Re: Chris Evans

Some cops are twats. Would have been best just to leave you with a warning.

My brother got a warning from a copper on his way to work. He stopped at a red light, and just before it was to go green he started to creep his car forward. Copper pulls him over and argues he didn't stop at the light. My brother argues he did stop, so the copper said "well, you went over the line" and asks for ID.

My brother argues he didn't go over and realised he only has one type of ID on him, which he is reluctant to show. He figures since the officer had asked for the ID he doesn't have a choice but to show it. Once my brother shows his warrant card, since he himself is also a police officer and on the way to the police station, the officer who pulled him over takes the body-cam off and starts acting different. "Oh, I was only going to caution you", to which my brother said "well, I didn't go over the line so there wasn't any reason to caution me anyway".

So yes, some officers can be knobheads, except to their own.

Metropolitan Police's facial recognition tech not only crap, but also of dubious legality – report

BrownishMonstr

Re: It's in its infancy, but it will improve

Absolute lies, every website has to implement their own spell checker.

Let's talk about April Fools' Day jokes. Are they ever really harmless?

BrownishMonstr

Re: Menu names

He sounds like a fucker

Here's a great idea: Why don't we hardcode the same private key into all our smart home hubs?

BrownishMonstr

Re: RE: TonyJ

I was replying to Huw D's comment saying people are being lazy.

Not everyone is lazy, for some people using IOT devices might be a temporary/permanent necessity.

BrownishMonstr

Re: RE: TonyJ

Yep, totally being lazy.

Has absolutely nothing to do with being disabled/frail/injured and wanting some sort of independence.

One-time permanent DWP secretary Robert Devereux set to rock up at 'ethical' tech biz Salesforce

BrownishMonstr

Fuckety auto correct. Plus tiredness.

BrownishMonstr

Ahhh, why the fuck do our ministers and knobs-in-charge* make decisions which are least likely to affect them. Fucking imbeciles. Fuck leaving the EU, let's do away with our own fucking parliament.

*I'm not sexiest, so pussies-in-charge, if your prefer.

Could an AI android live forever? What, like your other IT devices?

BrownishMonstr

Re: best assessment of likelyhood of AI apocalypse

Don't be fooled, people! Dabbsy is trying to distract you all from the truth. He is obviously a robot—I mean, look at his display picture!

Distractable

Android

B-something

B-something

System

Eggheads have found a positive link between the number of racist tweets and the number of racist hate crimes in US cities

BrownishMonstr

Re: Places where

I think it may be illegal to not hire someone based on their criminal history, depending on the job, and depending on whether the conviction is spent or not.

Hot desk hell: Staff spend two weeks a year looking for seats in open-plan offices

BrownishMonstr

Re: Hotdesking is awful?

I think it has its benefits. In my previous job we had some people in between two sites coming over hotdesking now and again. Oh and some woman in HR would come and hotdesk in the office some days a year for some fucking reason.

Well I think that's hotdesking.

Hipster yap app chaps Slack finally strap into NYSE: Shares of 'WORK' open at $38.50 apiece

BrownishMonstr

Re: Selling tools to prospectors

Don't think Slack UI is that much better. Constantly get "Please try refreshing Slack" for the desktop app several times in a row.

We knew it was coming: Bureaucratic cockup triggers '6-month' delay of age verification block on porno in the UK

BrownishMonstr

Re: This was always May's toy

The Great Blair. Oh, long live He, the Wise and All Knowing.

Blighty's online pr0n gatekeepers are begging for a regulatory beating, says digital rights org

BrownishMonstr

Re: "We want the UK to be the safest place in the world to be online"

Like a lot of things on the Internet, I would say depends what it is.

Anything depicting rape or anything else which is illegal is very obviously out. As well as anything too far out of the ordinary.

I wonder if it's best to allow some porn through the filter, but only the ones you've approved. That way they think they''ve gotten away with it but in reality they're most likely seeing the ones you prefer they watch.

As a newish parent, you want what is best for them and I remember thinking differently before she was born. It's easy to blame parents, but shit creeps up on you. Like fucking quick.

Hate your IT job? Sick of computers? Good news: An electronics-frying Sun superflare may hit 'in next 100 years'

BrownishMonstr

Re: Yeah let's frrrryyyyyyy

Couldn't this affect nuclear power plants, or weapons, and other things which need to be constantly monitored, or do these have good fail-safes and we can expect those responsible not to take any shortcuts?

Tech lobbyists turn on Trump over Mexican tariffs, then quickly try to smooth the waters

BrownishMonstr

Good tactic, pretty sure the president only remembers the last thing someone said. Although that may mean he won't take action on anything said prior to that.

Let's check in with our friends in England and, oh good, bloke fined after hiding face from police mug-recog cam

BrownishMonstr

Re: Social norms

Sounds like we're being ruled by a bunch of unsocial people.

BrownishMonstr

Re: What the heck

I thought he said he basically told them to fuck off, which isn't really any better.

Anyway, wasn't the advice he received basically that it's a no go zone?

BrownishMonstr

Big Brother is bending you over without even giving a reach-around, then fining you if you complain about it.

Freaky photo flingers face fat fines for flagrant phallus flashing fun

BrownishMonstr

Re: Potentially a good idea.

I'm an Accrington man.

Close enough, just not as orange.

BrownishMonstr

Re: Potentially a good idea.

Not sure about that.

I bet I can fit one up my arse!

Hi! It looks like you're working on a marketing strategy for a product nowhere near release! Would you like help?

BrownishMonstr

You can't come here and not provide the full story.

BrownishMonstr

Aye that is true.

BrownishMonstr

I don't think there's anything wrong with taking a stroll from your desk. It can be seen as unproductive, but sometimes just talking to colleagues gives you an insight into what they're working on and if they are currently finding it difficult to solve a problem. Alternatively, you might find out something interesting from them.

You might be able to fix that problem quicker, so helping them to solve it quicker will no doubt reduce the colleague's brain-drain. That is, their motivation may reduce as it takes them longer to find a solution to something which they find uninteresting.

Zavvi tells customers: You've won VIP tickets to Champions League final! And you've won tickets, and you've won tickets, and you, and...

BrownishMonstr

Re: On the plus side ...

I'll get me -->

Your dildo?

Not another pro-Brexit demo... though easy to confuse: Each Union Jack marks a pile of poo

BrownishMonstr

*County, dammit.

BrownishMonstr

I am rather sad there wasn't any derogatory comment about my country.

Cheapskate Brits appear to love their Poundland MVNOs as UK's big four snubbed in survey again

BrownishMonstr

Re: 1Gb Data a month - Really ?

Sometimes when I'm connected to WiFi (xkcd).

Loose Women woman's IR35 win deals another high-profile blow to UK taxman's grip on rules

BrownishMonstr

Re: Avoidance vs Evasion

I'm not sure how this would work as Starbuck's parent company is a different legal entity. If I created my own company and licensed something from another company, would the same rules apply?

Would the rules depend on how autonomous the child company is? Because depending how powerful the parent company is, they could exert some pressure on the child company even if the CEO of the child company wished it weren't so.

As long as there's fibre somewhere along the line, High Court judge reckons it's fine to flog it as 'fibre' broadband

BrownishMonstr

Re: "I'm a judge, and I can't understand the difference, so nobody can"

Damn you beat me to a good analogy. I was going to say something along the line of a house being connected to the water main, just the last mile has to be transported in a wheel Barrow.

A quick cup of coffee leaves production manager in fits and a cleaner in tears

BrownishMonstr

Re: Never Turn up Early!?

OTOH my manager praises me for coming in earlier and says people notice when you are in early but not when you leave.

HMRC accused of not understanding its own IR35 tax reforms ahead of private sector rollout

BrownishMonstr

Re: Admit it

It could be summed up as follows :

No government agency have full knowledge of their own rules, because it rarely applies to them. Until it does in which case they will rule in their favour.

Prepare yourselves for Windows 10 May-hem. Or is it June, no, July?

BrownishMonstr

Re: Windows Brexit Edition?

Is that the Windows as a service one? You pay a monthly fee but still won't get it for another 24 months, or maybe 6, or maybe 30.

Perhaps the chap who worked on the Windows progress ETA is on the brexit team.

No dice, comrade! Senate floats Russia-busting election law

BrownishMonstr

Re: Stable boor bolted :)

You just bought the show "orange is the new black"'a name to my head. Although the name is fitting, it perhaps isn't right to say...

The completely rational take you need on Europe approving Article 13: An ill-defined copyright regime to tame US tech

BrownishMonstr

Re: "and that group makes all the decisions on copying and sale."

I want to ask why the copyright should be with the artists if they were getting paid to create it? Should it not be the person or entity paying them?

Meet games-streaming Stadia, yet another thing Google will axe in two years

BrownishMonstr

Re: Making gaming even less attactive!

I have a colleague who rents a powerful VM out at about £30 pm so he can play games in good graphics. Otherwise he would have to buy a gaming pc which would be out of date soon. Supposedly the graphics are amazing and justifies the cost of the service and requiring a good fibre service from the ISP.

Not something for me because I wouldn't even have the time to start a game without the missus or the baby needing something.

Could OpenAI's 'too dangerous to release' language model be used to mimic you online? Yes, says this chap: I built a bot to prove it

BrownishMonstr

Damn it's a scary world. Let's ban AI..and computers.

You know, to protect the children and all that.

Protip: If you'd rather cyber-scoundrels didn't know the contents of your comp, don't apply for a Pakistani passport

BrownishMonstr

Re: "We contacted the Pakistani government..."

Perhaps corruption within the ranks. But the Gov probably has easier ways to get the data.

Age checks for online pr0n? I've never heard of it but it sounds like a good idea – survey

BrownishMonstr

Re: Porn block from Easter 2019

It will be blamed on the EU but then by the time it goes through to reconsideration people will be using it because, well, they're too fucking horny. At which point their response will be "well, people are using it so it isn't an issue".

Harassment, hate and bile, suicide instructions for kids... anything else social media's good at? Ah yes, cybercrime

BrownishMonstr

Re: But, but,,,,

I once saw some racist messages on a Facebook group (5yrs ago) and reported it. No surprise it was still there a week later. Not sure if Facebook's moderation methods have changed or remain the same.

Long phone is loooong: Sony swipes at flagship fatigue with 21:9 tall boy

BrownishMonstr

Re: 21:9 ratio, you say

Can't blame them doing this.

People ranted at Microsoft for not updating their phone to WP8 (or whatever) when the whole OS changed, even though it wasn't possible. They were updated to a newer version of 7 with ports of some of the features (where possible). Had MS just called it WP8 they wouldn't have complained even though it's a just a number.

Expect stupidity to hit even the wisest people.

BrownishMonstr

Android always feels like Windows 95 on LSD, not that the competitors are much better. But the crapware and malware on the play store puts me off, especially suggesting it to my parents who will no doubt install everything from the play store and wonder why ads are popping up on the phone at the OS level (my dad's samsung does this).

Artificial Intelligence: You know it isn't real, yeah?

BrownishMonstr

Re: It's Just Pattern Recognition

Isn't that what teachers do, though?

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