Posts by Solly

AI-created faces now look so real, humans can't spot the difference

Thankfully the tech isn't ready to do it in real-time

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qXLugdeogQU

Oh nevermind.

Maersk prepares to lay off the Maidenhead staffers who rescued it from NotPetya super-pwnage

Seems a lot like fascism then yes?

Google burns down more than 500 private-data-stealing, ad-defrauding Chrome extensions installed by 1.7m netizens

Adblock

Can someone combine this with Adblock, so I don't get that annoying disable adblock to continue guff...

It will never be safe to turn off your computer: Prankster harnesses the power of Windows 95 to torment fellow students

Leaning

Almost all our PC's have dual screens, one of our users has a nice landscape with a flat horizon as his background wallpaper, same image showing on both screens. I loaded up the landscape image into an art program and rotated the image by about 3 degrees, I then adjusted the screens so the horizon lines up again between the two displays. But when he actually tries to do some work all his windows are now leaning by 3 degrees (until he re-straightens the displays). I'm a bad person...

Pair programming? That's so 2017. Try out this deep-learning AI bot that autocompletes lines of source code for you

Relevant etc

It's been done before...

https://m.xkcd.com/2173/

Standards group W3C wins support from all major players to get AI working in the browser

Re: Feature creep

It's obvious really, you'll use it to automate completion of those annoying "I am not a robot" captchas...

Thousands of hornets swarm over innocent fire service drone

Re: "drone was attacked by the hornets while being used [..] to locate the creatures' nest"

The problem is preventing the existing insect species also exposing themselves to the Fipronil.

Perhaps someone could use machine learning of these hornets, sorta like hotdog not hotdog

https://www.theregister.co.uk/2017/07/10/skills_for_ai/

but with images of the hornets. A camera on a dual baited switchable food dispenser (one benign, the other poisoned) could use such a system where only the Asian Hornets receive the poisoned trough?

'Crazy bad' bug in Microsoft's Windows malware scanner can be used to install malware

Hmmm

Surely you could flood it with possible usernames with a zero byte password to establish which usernames had valid accounts, and then step one byte at a time revealing the passwords...

UK.gov gears up for IR35 private sector crackdown – say industry folk

You can run but you can't hide...

Where's the scary Terry Icon?

Algorithm advance alleviates AI amnesia

Bring yourself back online...

Can't they just apply the reveries update?

Batten down the hatches! OpenSSL preps fix for high impact vuln

Re: <Insert name here>

OpenSSLBug McOpenSSLBuggyface?

Squeeze the banana to log into this office Wi-Fi

How big is this thing?

If only there was something in the picture to assist in ascertaining the size and scale of this device.

SpaceX: launch, check. Landing? Needs work

Just Read the Instructions

That's a very Iain M Banks-esque name for a ship....

Cyber-terror: How real is the threat? Squirrels are more of a danger

1 in 5 Squirrels

etc

Bacon can kill: Official

Well it's official: eating bacon is as cool as smoking. Mind you I should be careful since I knock back 40 rashers a day....

World panics, children cry, workers sigh ... Facebook.com TITSUP

And www.isitdownrightnow.com

Is down as well, to many people trying to see if facebook is down is my guess...

NEW ERA for HUMANITY? NASA says something 'major' FOUND ON MARS

I've said it before....

http://forums.theregister.co.uk/forum/3/2013/02/09/mysterious_metal_mars_object/#c_1725881

MIT's robo-cheetah leaps walls in a cyborg hunt for Sarah Connor

It can't be bargained with. It can't be reasoned with. It doesn't feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are dead.

But hey, it's great at jumping :-)

Chap mines Bitcoin with PUNCH CARDS and ancient mainframe

Till the sun explodes...

Isn't the sun exploding right now?

Intel has ambitions to turn modems into virtual servers and reinvent broadband

This seems like a great idea, said every spook agency everywhere....

Man in the Middle Attack anyone?

Samsung's bend blame blast: We DEMAND a Galaxy S6 Edge do-over

You're bending it wrong...

Space Commanders lock missiles on Elite's Frontier Devs

I don't want a refund

Mind you, flying about in a spacecraft using a hands on throttle and stick with an Oculus Rift DK2 is the single greatest gaming experience I've ever had, nothing comes close...

Microsoft says to expect AWESOME things of Windows 10 in January

Re: High school adjectives for business solutions

"full of awe" you say? there is an auto-antonym which matches that: awful...

Feds dig up law from 1789 to demand Apple, Google decrypt smartphones, slabs

I've heard encryption described as a weapon, if that's the case doesn't the 2nd amendment trump this old law?

Creating your golden statue of Nicolas Cage finally possible

Whilst he may be cheesy in many of his films, I did think he was excellent in "Adaptation", also in "Leaving Las Vegas" and while we are on the subject of Birds he was also pretty good in "Birdy"... but yes he has been in some right turkeys....

Google, Apple pop a cap in that Flappy Birds crapp app flapp

Flappy Turd? surely Crappy Turd would've been more appropriate...

Romance is dead: Part-time model slings $1.5bn SUEBALL at Match.com

I'll believe it when i see it

Pic's or it didn't happen..... oh wait

'F-CK YOU GOOGLE+' ukelele missy scoops BIG WAD of $$ - for Google

I think you should all look at this...

http://www.b3ta.com/links/1093923/

Antivirus bods grilled: Do YOU turn a blind eye to government spyware?

Of course they will say they do

But I wouldn't be totally surprised if state sponsored spyware arrives in some of those AV definition updates - I mean AV scanners typically look at the whole drive every day, what spy agency wouldn't want a slice of that pie....

Former Microsoftie in AUTOMATIC BEER MAKER funding plea

Don't take the piss out of MS Beer...

...They'll be nothing left in the glass

NSA: Yes, some of our spooks DID snoop on overseas lovers

Not sure

My computer is running slow, is it windows being a shit or am I about to get a knock on the door by a sexy female spook.....

waits

Korean stealth-scraper plans will turn 450 metre tower INVISIBLE

Prior Art

Didn't Guy Fawkes attempt this in 1605?

Life … moves … in … slow … motion … for … little … critters … like … flies

It's always seemed obvious that animals with smaller bodies would have faster reaction times as the lengths of nerves connecting their muscles to their grey matter would be significantly shorter. It kinda follows that their perception of time would scale accordingly.

As for kids, well I think some of it is relative to experience, if you're a day old newborn, then another 24 hours would seem like a long time. Whereas if your 40 years old - a day is ever shrinking sliver of your collective experience hence the old adage "The years just flash by when you get to my age"

PRISM leaks: WTF, you don't spy on your friends, splutters EU

It's not just terrorism y'know

I'd bet that one of the trigger words which flags an individual for closer inspection is "invention", no matter where they are in the world...

CIA-funded upstart: The truth about Prism and NSA's web snooping

Scary

And my 8 year old son was doing prisms and pyramids in his maths homework only yesterday - clearly it's a VAST conspiracy....

Gourmet chemists sniff out ultimate cheese on toast

Toast bread well on one side and lightly on t'other. Grate some strong cheddar cheese, add a small splash of milk and a pinch of dried herbs maybe some chilli flakes if you fancy. Mash the cheese and additives together with a fork - it should be a firm paste (otherwise you've added too much milk). Spread the mixture onto the lightly toasted side with a knife and place back under the grill for about 90 seconds.

Allow 30 seconds to cool slightly and then eat before anyone sees you (because they WILL want to steal it)

variants: substitute natural yogurt for the milk, thinly spread marmite/harrissa/sundried tomato puree on the bread before you add the cheese topping etc

Finally – mind-controlled limbs without brain surgery

The 6 million dollar question

Is there a little window in the back of his head so you can see through his bionic eye?

IT'S OFFICIAL: Hipster era is OVER – sorry, beanie boiz...

I thought the vid was going to be this

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lhAr_UeroCk

Rules, shmules: Fliers leaving devices switched on in droves

Even in Aeroplane Mode

The phone has to periodically power up the radio to report back you GPS location to the FBI, Illuminati, Cabal of Lizard people..

Wake up sheeple!

Scottish SF master Iain M Banks reveals he has less than a year to live

When/If the aliens turn up...

They will be reading his culture series for helpful pointers and advice.

Though I've never met you, good luck old friend.

Razzie voters drive stake through Twilight

Re: Django Unchained ... Original Screenplay Oscar

Actually, Inglorious Bastards does share the same back story as the original and then diverges from the original when a critical scene in the original film goes one way and the Tarantino version goes another (and creates an alternate history in the process...) - kinda like the film sliding doors - but with nazi's...

Curiosity photographs mysterious metal object on Martian rock

It clearly a replacement part for a Tralfamadorian spaceship.

<Lights Moonmist Cigarette>

Baby sharks are so HARDCORE they avoid baddies like tiny ninjas

But..

... can they get Channel 5?

Pentagon hacker McKinnon will NOT be prosecuted in the UK

Re: Looks like cruel and unusual punishment to me.

"In America and England you cannot commit a crime, then get caught for that crime, and just walk away without a consequence of some kind."

Tell that to the board of HSBC

Apple shares take biggest one-day hammering in 4 years

It's ok

I sold all my apple shares to buy ones in facebook...

Adobe demands 7,000 years a day from humankind

TL:DR

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F1C4gWyW1Ng

Apple, HTC kiss and make up

I'm probably wrong but...

My guess is that Apple are playing Taiwan off against mainland China to secure themselves a better unit price, the margin difference being far better in the long run for Apple than having to settle with Samsung in South Korea with it's more progressive workers rights and safety legislation (=greater costs). The issue for HTC however is that it will be seen as sleeping with the enemy. If Apple can force them to self alienate themselves then that serves them well even if HTC are off the hook for 10 years.

UK prosecutors, cops ponder new probe into NASA hacker McKinnon

Re: The US should be thankful..

Well if my house was full of gold bars then maybe I should fit Fort Knox style locks, however from what i gather these systems were effectively locked doors with the key left in the lock, by your reasoned logic the information on the NASA and Military systems wasn't worth securing properly until after someone tried to nick it... real smart

But props to you for calling me a cretin, I am suitably chastised

The US should be thankful..

..that it was McKinnon poking around on the their "secure" systems looking for a UFO cover-up rather than a foreign power looking to steal secrets and subvert systems.

I'd say the following security review probably served them well in the long run. He should be getting paid for his exposure of the sloppy security they had in place prior to being caught, not banged up.