* Posts by Duffaboy

296 posts • joined 8 Mar 2011

Page:

Apple to Epic: Sue me? No, sue you, pal!

Duffaboy
Joke

Oh, suits you

No Suits you sir, you want it don't you....

India's telecoms given ten years to pay $22bn in back taxes they've already disputed for a decade

Duffaboy
Joke

I think that

a payment of £2 a week should cover it.

Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it's a 56-year-old satellite burning up in the sky spotted by sharp school kids

Duffaboy
Joke

Dam I would have gotten away with it

if it wan't for those pesky kids

ANPR maker Neology sues Newcastle City Council after failing to win 'air quality' snoopcam project bid

Duffaboy
Unhappy

It's my Football

And I'm taking it so you can't play

Windows 10 Insider wondering where Notepad has gone? Fear not, Microsoft found it down the back of Dev Channel

Duffaboy
Joke

WTF ?

It will be Minesweeper next

Customers of Brit ISP Virgin Media have downloaded an extra 325GB since March, though we can't think why

Duffaboy
Joke

Paging "private browsing"

You knows it....

Couple wrongly arrested over Gatwick Airport drone debacle score £200k payout from cops

Duffaboy
Holmes

I thought at the time this is just kids,

At the time this story broke i felt that it was some child playing with their birthday pressie not realising the chaos they were causing. The keystone cops should have a root and branch review into their lack of common sense and understanding of the tech

Sony reveals PlayStation 5 will offer heretical no-optical-disk option. And yes, it has an AMD CPU-GPU combo

Duffaboy
Facepalm

Yes but what everyone wants to know is

HOW MUCH IS IT GOING TO COST ?

Play stupid games, win stupid prizes: UK man gets 3 years for torching 4G phone mast over 5G fears

Duffaboy
Trollface

I bet his Great, Great, Great Grandfather thought

That you would suffocate if you rode on a steam train.

Microsoft throws extended support lifeline for folk stuck on car-crash Windows 10 1809

Duffaboy
Alert

Still a lot of Windows 7 out there

Considering the global covid-19 outbreak this has put some migrations on the back burner...

Remember Tapplock, the 'unbreakable' smart lock that was allergic to screwdrivers? The FTC just slapped it down for 'deceiving' folks

Duffaboy
Pirate

Nothing is secure

By design there is always a work around to defeat any type of security as this let's the manufacturers in for testing. What they hope for is that this is never leaked or discovered and it keeps the opportunist out, anyone determined to get in will.

'Anything' related to remote working is a winner for Euro disties, but classic enterprise hardware? That's another story

Duffaboy

Re: But if there is ever an end to this...

Trust me there are big corporates who are now evaluating home working as it will save them a bucket load of cash on building costs. They just needed a nudge to encourage them to explore this, and the longer it goes on they will be very reluctant to go back to having it's staff in large offices that they will have to heat and pay rent on.

Real-time tragedy: Dumb deletion leaves librarian red-faced and fails to nix teenage kicks on the school network

Duffaboy
Thumb Up

Ah Altavista

I loved that search engine

UK to Chinese telecoms giant: From 5G in Tiree to the Isles of Ebony, carry me on the waves… Sail Huawei, sail Huawei, sail Huawei

Duffaboy
FAIL

Re: Who do we have to blame for this?

your just sore cause you didn't get your free broadband and umbrella (for when it rained)

Brit banking sector hasn't gone a single day of 2020 without something breaking

Duffaboy
FAIL

I always laugh when companies use the phrases

Some = All

A few = All

Small number = All

Limited = All

Labour: Free British broadband for country if we win general election

Duffaboy

The reason Labour are touting this is

They know they haven't a prayer of winning the 2019 election. Just think about it for a minute they are promising full fibre internet everywhere even so that includes rural and remote places like snowdonia. That's right the Labour Party are promising free internet access to every home in the uk by 2030 you can't even make a cell phone call in some parts of scotland and wales.

Londoner accused of accessing National Lottery users' accounts

Duffaboy
FAIL

No case to answer M'lud

Unless he is found guilty of stealing your Free goes he has no charges to answer. All I seem to get is from the National Lottery is "Exciting news about your ticket" "you've won a free go!" broadly translated as "you've won naff all, we will cash your cash next week"

Don't panic: Dixons Carphone's share price crashes 30% after statutory losses hit £329m

Duffaboy
Trollface

Wanna buy a new phone ?

Na, I got one last year

Oracle suspects Pentagon fell for a JEDI Prime trick: Amazon now accused of luring two officials with jobs

Duffaboy
FAIL

Dam you Elreg

For a moment I was drawn to the article thinking that much anticipated return of the much loved show and cheap sets would be making a return..

Oh dear, Lads: Spam marketing bosses banned from forming UK firms for clobbering folk with 500k calls and texts

This post has been deleted by a moderator

Duffaboy
FAIL

This will hardly stop them from setting up again.

They will just ask someone else to be the front of the company.

London's Met police confess: We made just one successful collar in latest facial recog trial

Duffaboy
Joke

A police spokesman said

Damn those Pesky Guy Fawkes masks.

Tedious Service Bulletin: No prizes for guessing which UK bank's services are DOWN for business users

Duffaboy
FAIL

“working hard to fix this”

i.e we have no %$^&ing idea whats gone wrong

NASA's Opportunity rover celebrates 15 years on Mars – by staying as dead as a doornail

Duffaboy
Joke

Last GPS signal it gave was

Somewhere near Heathrow I believe

Error pop-up? Don't worry, let's just get this migration done... BTW it's my day off tomorrow

Duffaboy

Typical User

No end of times I get this.

User " An error popped up".

Me "Ok, What did it say"

User " I can't remember"

Me "What were you doing at the time"

User "I can't Remember"

Me "When did it last happen"

User "Months ago" (even though you are there on an unrelated matter.

or

User " I have a message here what do I do"

Me "Ok what is it saying"

User "Well its just asking me to click OK"

Me "Anything Else"

User "No, Just ok"

Me "Well you don't have much choice really than to just click OK."

A few reasons why cops haven't immediately shot down London Gatwick airport drone menace

Duffaboy
Alert

Has any one thought

That this could just be kids messing about with drones as they have broken up early for christmas.

Scumbag hackers lift $1m from children's charity

Duffaboy
FAIL

Wonder how much the It Training budget is?

I guess minimal or nothing.

GCSE computer science should be exam only, says Ofqual

Duffaboy
FAIL

When the kids own IT at home is better than the Sh*t they have at school

Most schools where I live use a certain supplier who's kit has been renowned for years to be a pile of stinking crap.

Russian rocket goes BOOM again – this time with a crew on it

Duffaboy

Damn them pesky

Windows 10 updates

Day two – and Windows 10 October 2018 Update trips over Intel audio

Duffaboy

So in summary

It's Intel's fault

A story of M, a failed retailer: We'll give you a clue – it rhymes with Charlie Chaplin

Duffaboy
FAIL

They failed because

1. Lacking in customer service, you walking in the store and had to dodge the pushy sales staff who wanted to bother you all the time (take note PC World)

2. Overpriced 10 quid for a lighting cable for instance

3. Staff lacked technical knowledge of the products they were selling, back in my student days the staff knew what component xyz did and could suggest an alternative.

4. Too many stores, you have to sell a lot of kit to cover wages, rates etc

Amazon Alexa outage: Voice-activated devices are down in UK and beyond

Duffaboy
Joke

Hang on what if

in the throws of ecstasy and passion Alexa misinterprets the command "yes yes yes" and puts on a track from the English prog rock band

Duffaboy
Joke

It's Skynet

I'll be back

HP Ink should cough up $1.5m for bricking printers using unofficial cartridges – lawsuit

Duffaboy
FAIL

though i never use refills myself

Hp have no right to do this to "your" equipment you bought it you own so therefore you should be able to do with it as you please.

You know all those movies you bought from Apple? Um, well, think different: You didn't

Duffaboy
Trollface

Please read the 500 odd

pages of your T&C's as it is buried there in the very small print

This page is left intentionally blank

This suggestion has been deleted by a moderator

This suggestion has been deleted by a moderator

A third of London boroughs 'fess to running unsupported server software

Duffaboy

Xp is still alive

worked on a couple of boxes this week

London's Gatwick Airport flies back to the future as screens fail

Duffaboy
FAIL

When will they learn

Seriously cutting costs never ever saves money in the long term

Almost 1 in 3 Brits think they lack computer skills to do their jobs well

Duffaboy
FAIL

there is a simple reason for this.

99% of companies issue their end users with IT kit without any sort of training on how to use it. I have only ever once witnessed an instance where training was mandatory, each user had to sit with a trainer going through the new features of windows and office. If all companies did this then us support staff would have little to do. There are numerous times i have been asked by a user who has logged a fault because they can't do the simplest of things such as printing, connecting a projector saving a file, creating an email signature, etc.

ZX Spectrum reboot latest: Some Vega+s arrive, Sky pulls plug, Clive drops ball

Duffaboy

Re: I was "lucky" enough to receive one...

"But you're not going away empty-handed - no, by Jiminy, you're not! You're taking away with you" (pause for dramatic effect) - "a botched together vega +!"

Duffaboy
FAIL

Re: Give it 10 years

it would have probably disintegrated by then,

ZX Spectrum reboot firm boss delays director vote date again

Duffaboy

Pic of shipped vega

https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/38420942_10155407196092062_1611979386003652608_n.jpg?_nc_cat=0&oh=765289cd1007fca3f16141ea8dfe9d3d&oe=5BD5037E

Duffaboy
FAIL

limited numbers of vega's have shipped and El Reg were informed of this

https://www.eurogamer.net/articles/2018-07-30-backers-have-started-to-receive-the-beleaguered-zx-spectrum-vega-plus-but-early-impressions-arent-great

Outage outrage: TSB app offers users a TITSUP* encore

Duffaboy

Re: Why

Well indeed but however you would let the heat die down first, they have failed again with what little confidence as a customer you had left

Duffaboy
FAIL

Why

Would you even think that it was a good idea to run another update on your systems considering the previous problems switching apps/platforms caused

IBM memo to staff: Our CEO Ginni is visiting so please 'act normally!'

Duffaboy

Re: Desks should be clear anyway,...

A clean desk is a sure sign of no work been done

Duffaboy
Trollface

where i work

this is achieved by walking around with a bit of paper in your hand.

Duffaboy
Joke

Quick everyone

Remove the pictures of meg whitman

Page:

SUBSCRIBE TO OUR WEEKLY TECH NEWSLETTER

Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2020