* Posts by CharleyBoy

44 publicly visible posts • joined 7 Jun 2007

Geeks whup Marine ass in Call Of Duty 5


Major assumption

Most comments here seem to be assuming that the marines weren't also geeks. I don't think that they are exclusive. I lot of the ex-soldiers I know have said that they used long period of "wait time" to hone up their gaming - not online though, I think.

Dutch court convicts teens for stealing pixels


In the real world

Sounds like they got exactly what they deserved. Time spent away from their computers amongst real people. Admittedly, when I was younger, I had quite a few of those moments when you look up from a game and notice that is now light again outside [later on that tended to happen with programming ], but that's no excuse for giving some one a thumping offline instead of on.

NASA: Mars is good habitat for Terry Pratchett dragons



We found a nasty substance where we sampled - ergo Mars is full of nasty substances. Meanwhile one metre to either side...

More dodgy phone-ins cost BBC £400,000


re: Forget fines, I want a discount.

The BBC don't set the license fee. It is a tax set by the treasury and collected on the Government's behalf by the BBC (for a cut) and then allocated back to them as long as they provide public service broadcasting. the Gov. doesn't actually HAVE to give any money to the BBC - though they are commited to doing so for quite some time to come. So, technically, the fee is the tax you pay the Gov. to be allowed to receive a video broadcast - that's TV, realtime internet streamed video - (video message from a phone?). I think the legal term it a Hypothcated Tax IIRC

Get a discount! Don't make me laugh.

Woman finds Lithuanian living in shed



That's the shed?

I took a look at the image on the link and have to admit I was expecting a small, boarded shed type thing, maybe enough for a few spades and tins of screws and the likes - but that looks bloody massive. No wonder he moved in. Bit of find if your homeless I should imagine.

ICANN approves customized top-level domains


Never mind the phish

The following won't be much of a problem





but maybe these will



natwest.co.uk != nâtwest.co.uk

I think take up of a these new format domains will be slow if only

because a huge amount of filtering software -esp. for email will

simply block based on rules for what is acceptable to that provider.

Mega-mortuary creaks open its doors in Westminster


just what they deserve

"– and give victims the justice they deserve"

Hmm, Slice and Dice by the Government - just what people deserve. They shouldn't have been so negligent as to be involved in a crime in the first place.

Captain Cyborg plans to milk you, human scum


Don't know off this guy

I don't have a T.V. so I've never seen this guy, but from all accounts isn't he merely this generation's Wilf Lunn. I used to cringe as a kid every time *he* was trundled out - on seemingly every blood opportunity - with his latest "super" invention. I guess there is simply some sort of deep need in the media exec's mindset that needs this kind of guy to fulfill.

Tesco slaps cutlery ban on under-18s


Why is this news?

Notices have been up to this effect on any item containing a knife - of any description sice the law changed.

Frankly I feel sorry for the teenagers. I had to start to shave when I was leaving my thirteenth year (not every day, but it was necessary). If I was of that age now I wouldn't be able to even BUY a pack of safety razors. You know, those packs of really expensive extruded plastic with tiny, tiny slithers of metal that last about two shaves before you have to landfill them. What do they think people are going to do, smash fifty of them and glue them to a stick or something? Hell, half an hour with a nail file(metal obviously) and a sturdy rock and you have a knife blade of some lethality. Attach a decent handle and your away.

I used to do this as a kid using my back door step. Admittedly, the worst thing I ever did was to serious maul some sticks with my wittling attempts (look, pointy stick!). Ban all nail care product now I say! Who knows how they may be used!

Plastic police to enforce London bag ban?


Errmm - lots of hot air here I think

I don't have a car - never have, a life choice. I shop at Morrisions, Tesco, LIDL and ALDI. Basically because they are near to where I work or live. I shop using either a large rucksack, or a small rucksack.

What I see in the first two supermarkets who give away bags is this:

People shop by filling a basket or a trolley. They get to the checkout and pack everything into bags which they put back into the trolley. They go to their car and move the bags to the boot. They drive off. Then presumably when they get home they empty the bags and throw them/reuse them. So, the bags are used as a very small convenience in getting the shopping in and out of the car. That's it.

What I see in the other two supermarkets - who charge for carrier bags - is that when people get to the checkout they generally put the shopping back into the trolley, mostly buying bags for the frozen items. Presumably, for the sake of five pence, or so, people are quite happy to take a little longer to load/unload their car - or perhaps have the foresight to bring a box in the boot.

Bottom line: I can see the sense in making supermarkets charge for bags. It makes for a level playing field. They only give them away free because it is cheap for them to do so and is seen by customers as an advantage. Hell, I bet most people only pack into bags because they *are* getting something free. Even if they throw them away half an hour later.

Next: get them to cut down on the amount of bloody packaging they use. If they're selling loose apple then why the hell do they need the same ones packed up in five different ways as well?

Satanic car key traps 12 motorists in car park of horror


You really believe OFCOM!?

As if OFCOM could actually be of some use. Come on. It is clear that they are guessing. The car owners are simply being "fobbed" off with a rubbish answer.

ROTM - obviously.

Nvidia introduces 'G92'


What's this?

What's this? Looks like a PCI chocolate bar. Where are all the corrugated bits? Where are the big whirring windmills and pipes.


Way too girly to sell. They need to stick on some meccano to make things like this fly off the shelves. Who's going to believe it is more powerful than the last one unless it looks like a construction set explosion. I mean, really.

Mammoth wool gives up genetic secrets


ancient humans?

"... and even ancient humans, held in the vaults of the world's museums."

Aha! So that's what the Government is planning on doing instead of continuing state pensions.

Master crim leaves vital clue at scene of burglary



So they cause £2,175 worth of damage and the courts make them pay back £1,500 between them (eventually - maybe, no doubt). Is it just me that thinks that is just wrong?

Movie pirate forced to ditch Linux



Surely they are only "monitoring" his online activities?

If so, he can stay offline with his pet ubuntu, or install windows - assuming he can afford it - and use that for his online whatever.

As for him having, " served his time". Well, no he hasn't. He's served half his time - the bit inside. So, if he does not like the terms I suggest he go back inside and use the facilities there. If he doesn't like it he should not have committed the crime.

Nicole Richie does 82 minutes hard time


What's the point

If they are sentencing people to time inside but releasing them within 12 hours anyway. Then what's the point of sentencing them to "do time" at all. Effectively it isn't a sentence at all. Better all round to punish them in a different way.

Before anyone posts the "where's the IT angle" knee-jerk post. Can I point out that this is in the "Odds and Sods" section and so does not need one? Yes? Jolly good.

Robber held up bookies with vibrator


Terrifying indead!

Maybe he should have gone for something with a"pump action" instead. :-)

'Grim reaper' dog senses nursing home deaths



Maybe this is the nursing home's attempt to get the lazier residents up and taking some exercise. I can just see them standing at the end of a corridor announcing in a raise voice,

"Come on then Scamp. Let's take you around to see the residents then.".

Meanwhile residents are shuffling like crazy to the other end of the home, jumping out the windows, smashing into fire exits. Obviously, everyone there is going to know that if they're not fast enough in getting out of the way then, they've had it.

I'd hate to be a new resident there (evidently they go through a few - forty gone in three years!).

"Hello, chaps. This is Mr. Smith he's coming to live here today. Please, make him welcome".

"Sure, Sure."

"Shh. Shh, Don't mention Scamp. Maybe that way we'll have a chance.".

"Wa? Wassat?"

"Nothing, Nothing Old chap. Have a seat. Here by the nurses station. Never mind the dog basket. You'll be fine there. [snigger]."

'Law and Order' cop accused of child porn possession


Poor sod

Frankly, whatever he was up to I feel sorry for the chap who found the pictures.

I had reason to work for a client some time back who specialised in web-services for transexual/gender non-specifics. Perfectly legal (I checked, believe me). I have no problems with that sort of thing, what people do with their own life, and so on, but I don't lean that way myself and don't seek out or want to look at such images - even rendered "legal". Amazing how much work you can get done by REALLY focusing on just the spot on-screen that you have to and ignoring the rest as best you can. Afterwards I flet as though I wanted to wash my eyeballs.

So, although the world takes all types. I feel sorry for the chap who came across these images. I assume he's not into that sort of thing himself.


BT rubbishes BBC bandwidth throttling reports


License Fee

You don't pay your license fee to the BBC for services. You pay your license fee to the Government for the privilege of receiving realtime (or near-realtime) video broadcasts. The Gov. then allocates it for public services television - so far it all goes to the BBC (some is earmarked for SKY in the near future as a one off payment, I believe).

They deliberately confuse things by having the BBC act as a public authority in collecting the damned thing - who then sensibly distance themselves by paying a third party to do the actual grunt work.

Make no mistake this is a tax, a hypothecated tax no less, If you need context thing road tax for video broadcasts. If you need more info, or want to confirm this, check out the governments office of statistics, the Lor Justice Aulds review of the criminal justice system. Hell, just google "hypothecated tax television".

Personally, I think they should just come out an make it very, very plain to the population that this is a tax, and not a "fee", for the BBC.

Council worker develops PC energy-saving program


Re: How to switch off the monitor/lamp/printer/mobile charger by your PC

A small circuit and relay attached to a USB line can turn devices on and off with the computer. It isn't using the USB protocol just the presence, or not, of the 5v supply. Someone built me one of these a few years ago (I no longer have it). It consisted of about 4, or 5 components (on the circuit) and switched an extension cord on and off. Absolutely fantastic. I could do with one again now that I'm proliferating eSATA drives left, right and center.


Matthew: Ta. I figured when I read it that it was simply written badly, but, just in case there is some fantastic device, or setup available to council services which is able to able to scan hard-drives remotely whilst the machine is off, I had to ask.

I'll take off my tin-foil helmet now then. :-)


scans while switched off?


Kear said: "We already have software that scans every county council computer when they are switched off to ensure they have the latest anti-virus protection installed.


Okay, I'm missing something here - maybe some background in my education. Are these thin-clients? It does not read that way. If not then how the hell do you scan them when they are switched off?

MySpace erases 29,000 sex offenders


You Brits have a great word for this kind of nonsense:

Ah... Nearly right.

It's, "Bollocks". A Bullock is a gelded/castrated bull. But having pointed that out I can see why it might come to mind in a conversation covering actions taken against sex offenders.



Tell you what

Tell you what, if I had a MySpace account right now I'd be making sure that everyone knew it was still active. I wonder how many are looking around their MySpace contacts looking for ones that have recently gone quiet.

"Hey, I have not heard from 'Georgina, 15 from Liverpool' for a while - gosh! S/he must have been a perv!"

Mozilla confirms own URL handling bug


Gaol the lot of them

I run my browsers on linux from within a chroot-ed jail. I've never had a problem and don't worry too much about them breaking out and savaging the system. In fact, I have set these up in the same way for a few newby linux users who wanted the security once they heard that it was - and I've never heard complaints from any of them. Of course updating the browser is a little more of a chore - but you need to do so less often also.

Fasthosts update: still above water


Who offers similar deals

I use Cyberquest/UK1. They are a small family run business. They have their own datacentre in Preston and offer machines, or will take care of your own, virual hosting, etc. etc. etc, all the standard stuff. You can always get them on the phone, they are friendly and helpful. Their own website(s) look poo but I think that it's more to do with them concentrating on what they do best - which isn't web design, it's hosting internet services. Been with them 5+ years and never a problem servers and server software is updated frequently.

Preston does have a river but I've never heard of it blowing it's banks - it was straightend in the late 1800's I believe. And ... No volcanoes!

Motorola discovers cheaper phones lead to lower profits


headcount reductions?

So will they be reducing heads (nasty), or the number of times they count them?

Brings to mind an image of nursery school teachers standing over a class of toddlers.

"15?, 15! There's supposed to be 16! Who'll tell the parents?!"

German hurls computer from apartment block


If it happened in England

Of course if it had happened in England the chap would probably be locked up now awaiting investigation for terrorism - having caused an explosion- and the tabloids would be having a feild day describing the neighbourhood as in SHOCK, or PANICING, whilst living in TERROR at the HORROR they now feel regarding falling consumer electronics.

P.S. Was it just the computer case he threw out? I have visions of a real Blue-screen-of-death decending from the skies and landing on some hapless passerby.

Iowa plans audacious Harry Potter butter sculpture


The butter

I don't know about the butter but the thought of this is making my stomach churn




Jonathan King in Harold Shipman song rumpus


Age of Consent

Hmmm. My, albeit naive understanding has always been the following.

The "Age of Consent" marks the point before which a person is legally considered to be incapable of giving consent. That has always seemed really clear-cut to me. doesn't matter how eager, or what-not they seem. They are legally incapable of consenting and so can't and haven't.

So, have sexual relations with anyone below that age and your commiting rape with a minor. Easy enough to understand I've always thought.

El Reg seeks ultimate 'nom de sex'


Mrs K.

I used to work at a Call centre for a very well known credit company. A large proportion of the staff were rendered speakless one day when one lady rang up. She had the surname "kisscock". This wasn't her maiden name which was when the silence and slack jawed-ness tended to hit people - imagine the wedding ceremony!

She must have really loved him.

I don't do to well on the names front: "Fluffy Longford"

Experian rejects ID theft notification proposal


Hmmm. Experian in the UK

I know Experian is a multi-national so I can't comment on countries than the UK and my info is a few years out of date, but I used to work with the Experian computer/databases and the following is a very high level view of what is stored.

If you have anything owning to a credit-provider then they register the fact that a payment is required at a certain point. If a payment is received successfully then they record that. If it isn't then they record that also and they record if, for some reason thay payment was subsequently not required after all. So a three state flag. (actually is also sorted how late a payment was also)

"CompanyX 1 1 1 1 2 1 2 3 1 1 1 0 0 0 "

Companies purchasing services from Experian would typically simply take Experian's "summary" information on how good a credit risk you are - the number of payments wanted on time compared to how many were received. Offset by the severity of late payments. Basically that's the "credit rating". What they do with that information is up to them. Many credit providers like payers who are often slightly late, but not too much, as they incure charges and provide income for the companies. The information held is supposed to cycle out over seven years.

If you have never taken anything on credit, no loans, mortgages, catalogue purchases (student loans don't count I'm told) then you will not have a credit history/ record AT ALL. This is *not* the same as a good credit history and in fact if you are 28(ish)+ and have never had credit you may find it hard to do so. The tip we used to give such people was to take out a catalogue account, make a small purchase and make all the payments, regularly and on time.

Banks typically hold their own information and take more information from Experian than just the basic "credit-rating". They use this to generate a Delphi score which is different for each bank and involves lots of high voodoo. You have access to your credit history and can request corrections if you can prove they are wrong but good luck finding out about the Delphi score(s).


I don't know if this has changed much but Equifax used to mirror the Experian data (though not all of it) over night and so typically lagged by 24 hours or so, but had the same info - a reason they were always a bit cheaper - they were a reseller basically.

Chinese netizens prevent 800-cat stir-fry


Maybe it was a multi-offer

Maybe the purchasers were looking to provide a multi-offer. Two portions of cat Chow Mein and we'll throw in a couple sets of fur ear muffs, and some violin strings.

Durex seeks hardened condom testers



I suppose that this is one job where you would actually have to try and get the sack

Chinese women crave Bill Gates' sperm


Chinese women crave Bill Gates' sperm???!



... but think about all the bugs!

Enraged reader savages iPhone fanboys


Re: If you don't calm down...

> "...Mr and Mrs Spank will be paying a short, sharp trip to botty land."

Better be quick before that extreme porn law gets in then

Plain chocolate could help your heart


It may be called chocolate...

It may be called chocolate, it may be the purest chocolate around, but anything 80% and above isn't chocolate - it's bakelite

Possession of extreme porn to become criminal offence


Venereal Disease?

Hmmm, how far does this go?

What consitiutes injury?

Getting infected with a venereal disease though sex, or whatever, can result in some really nasty effects, esp. if left untreated. So would pictures of people having unprotected sex - which it could be argued would be, "likely to result in injury" (your knob drops off, you become HIV+) - be covered? Who decides?

Would a bit of "slap and tickle", a British phrase if ever there was one, count? Who decides? The prosecutor, the judge? If I remember my biology your skin goes red when struck because the surrounding flesh gets suffused with histamines to help reduce any "injury" so would slapping someone enough to raise a red mark be enough?

In fact - "likely to cause injury", would a photo of a couple kissing where one was poised to slap the other's backside consitute likely, etc., etc., etc.

Ebuyer in hard-drive warranty debacle


Hmm, paper trail

Just a few points I'm pondering.

1. Do the buyers have an actual paper warranty?

If not and if they didn't notice then (Ie. this had not come to light like it has), then how would they prove that they ever had the warranty. I CAN imagine ebuyer saying three years down the line - "nope, sorry mate that's an OEM drive, standard warranty of one year. Five years! Don't know what your talking about". And I have dealt with ebuyer and can believe this would happen. Even with things like archive.org things vanish forever when they are only available online.

2. Silly thought really. They haven't cut-and-pasted the description, including warranty information from a competitors site have they? Not noticing the difference - their are retail, ours are OWM. Naaaah! I'm sure they've stopped all that now.

Wind-powered phone-charger coming to market?



I remember reading about this device a while back. It was suggested that it be left on the tent charging your phone while you go off and enjoy your self. What an excelent way to let people know you are leaving you phone behind in your tent! Plus, I'd bet that these are hot items for nicking and flogging on the black-market. So would people use them like this? Nah!

I do have visions of people walking about with then stuck to the top of their rucksacks though (don't mention beany hats).

A lot of comments above seem to have jumped straight into the standard, frothing at the mouth, "is is REALLY green" topic. Is that a major issue? I thought that this was simply an alternative to buying expensive duplicate batteries. With the amount of picture and video messageing that goes on at concerts I can see battery life being an issue too.

Ofcom responds to threatened luvvies


Re: Re: Impoverished

>Hurt theatre and you cut off the talent supply from television...


Put that way. PLEASE hurt the theatres.

Iran approves death penalty for pornographers


You're all looking at this wrong

You're all looking at this wrong, a middle-eastern country is trying to restrict something that America makes a lot of money out of. Hell, pornography is probably the second biggest industry after oil ;-)

So, Iran should be watching its borders intently now for the inevitable 'help' it will 'receive' from the good ol' u.s. of a. They can't go around restricting American industry like that after all.

Long Beach cops boast first Segway-borne bust


I expect the height increase helps too

Height is intimidating. I expect having to look up to a cop who is towering an extra 9 inches above you adds a bit of presence the their, well, presence. I seem to remember hearing somewhere that this was one of the reasons for the British bobbies helmet shape (I'm sure not the only one). In so much as it added to the perceive height of the officer and helped to add to their authority.

On the other hand if I had to talk to an "officer" and they were stood towering above me on a segway I'd probably get pretty pissed off by it in short order. It's bad enough being shouted down at by mounted police.

So what's in a URL? The Reg URL?


The .co.uk is not just a domain name

The .co.uk is not just a domain name it is also an indicator that the site is British. this may sound obvious but is an American visited a site an came across a huge bunch of nasty colloquialisms then the .co.uk is a clear sign that these are intended. If theregister dropped the .co.uk then I think there would be pressure to make the articles, or at least more of the language used in them "one-size-fits-all".

Personally, I think the Americans should get more practice in reading language that isn't exactly what they are used to. I used to work at a University in the North-West of England and was always surprised by the American students who would turn their nose-up and complain when things were not couched in language they were familiar with (often easy to work out from context). The attitude was rarely, "What does that mean? Oh, right, I'll remember that.", but, "What! If your not going to speak so that I understand then you won't believe the fuss I going to kick up. Speak Am-er-ican!".

Anyway. I vote to keep it .co.uk