* Posts by bpfh

749 posts • joined 26 Jan 2011

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The old New: Windows veteran explains that menu item

bpfh
WTF?

Euh?

Windows has allowed this since ...... well forever in 32 bits, certainly since XP. Why is this news or have I missed something?

Black screens in Windows 11? Bork has seen it all before

bpfh
Childcatcher

Guru meditation error

I think it’s in Varnish cache.

Also, I cut my teeth on OS/2 white in black “Trap D”’s (mostly D, although a couple of other letters too). Way more scary than a Win3.1 blue screen

Revealed: Why Windows Task Manager took a cuddlier approach to (process) death and destruction

bpfh

Re: -9

#echo "boo" > /dev/kmem would generally also end up with a stop or restart.

BOFH: Oh for Pete’s sake. Don’t make a spectacle of yourself

bpfh
Devil

Re: Where can I buy the kit?

Same. Add in an enhanced cattle prod too please.

Do you want to become a vulture? Now's your chance to join The Register's news desk

bpfh
Pint

Chainsmoking and heavy drinking

Come back Chris Hitchens! We have the perfect role for you!

BOFH: When the Sun rises in the West and sets in the East, only then will the UPS cease to supply uninterrupted voltage

bpfh
Angel

Aaaaah finally, a kzert!

Been wating for loong time!

BOFH: I'm so pleased to be on the call, Boss. No, of course this isn't a recording

bpfh

Re: Dave

When you are on zoom, nobody knows where you are…

US nuclear weapon bunker security secrets spill from online flashcards since 2013

bpfh

Re: Matryoshka

The "shape of the hole" is an interesting concept. I moved to France in 1991, and watching both British and French news about the latest goings on in Iraq, and was interesting to see that the different state media organisations had very different takes on the on-goings, and things reported in one country were totally avoided by the other and vice versa.

bpfh

Re: Ah, siteguard

That’s called an own-goal, no? And as for being tired…. “Exhausting” I think is the correct term…

<shudder>

Tesla owners win legal fight after software update crippled older Model S batteries

bpfh

Re: Carbon neutral

What? Do you know how many parts go into an ICE? So Tesla have a brain box, battery, a set of motors made of bearings, magnets and miles of windings.

An ICE has these (well, one electric motor for a starter and alternator) plus all the bits to make an Otto cycle run, precision castings, pistons, cylinders, pumps, joints, seals, bearings and all the depollution bits and high pressure fuel injection, turbochargers, gearboxes and all sorts of pieces of metal spinning at high speeds and in synch.

Builiding an EV is quite simple. “Anyone” can do it - but making one a commercial success, with batteries that don’t run out of electrons after 50 miles or weigh 4 tons and pollute the hell out of parts of China or South America, that’s the hard part!

New IETF draft reveals Egyptians invented pyramids to sharpen razor blades

bpfh

Yes please

White, no sugar.

Apple sent my data to the FBI, says boss of controversial research paper trove Sci-Hub

bpfh
Joke

Re: Apple sent my data to the FBI, says boss

Sarcasm is a category 2 micro-agression and will no longer be tolerated in this Safe Space. You will be reported to Human Remains for retraining.

bpfh
Coat

Re: That's fine for academics, but...

Semantically speaking…. An RFC - Request For Comments - is not a standard, but a document still working towards its final version.

Actual standards - IETF STD documents are rarer… although they are still free!

Zis konkludes my ekzplanation and I vill get mein coat.

Tesla Autopilot is a lot dumber than CEO Musk claims, says Cali DMV after speaking to the software's boss

bpfh

Re: Christ Almighty…

About 10 years ago, stuck in a jam at 9 AM at Porte Maillot on a Pacific Coast. Car in front about 10 cm from my front wheel, and the car behind 10 cm from the boot. Suddenly my bike starts falling over, as one guy starts to gently push my bike over and try to get a head start into the jam... Good days... :(

bpfh

Christ Almighty…

Porte Maillot and The Étoile roundabout around the Arc de Triomphe are scary enough as it is, on 2 or 4 wheels and you need your head on a gimball and even that mag not be enough. I’d love to see a fully automatic car navigate that at 8:30 on a Tuesday morning…

Crane horror Reg reader uses his severed finger to unlock Samsung Galaxy phone

bpfh
Coat

Talk about giving biometric security the finger...

I'll get my coat -->

NYPD puts down $94k robot canine contract after outcry

bpfh
Joke

Lassie?

Or LaCie?

We've finally hit Peak Bork: Microsoft man reveals home-grown welcome back BSOD at Redmond HQ

bpfh
Devil

Re: Pointless?

Shirley you have got Windows confused with Android?

They said it'd never happen, but here we are in the year of our Lord 2021 and Microsoft has its own OpenJDK flavour

bpfh
Mushroom

Have we not been here before?

> The company warned that the binaries "may contain backported fixes and enhancements we deem important to our customers and our internal users"

The rotting undead lawsuit riddled corpses of J++ and Microsoft's Java Virtual Machine crawl out of their unmarked tombs from where they were unceremoniously dumped by torch and pitchfork wielding internet users, lawyers and Scott McNealy almost 20 years ago, staggering around and moaning for brains....

Scientists stumped by strange X-rays from Uranus

bpfh
Mushroom

X-rays from Uranus

Must have been one hell of a curry!

Yes, there's nothing quite like braving the M4 into London on the eve of a bank holiday just to eject a non-bootable floppy

bpfh

Re: HR's Disappearing Data

There is no I in Team but there is a U in Cun*

Proof that Surface devices are not a niche product obsessed over by Microsoft fans: A patent lawsuit from Caltech

bpfh

Re: Re:Qualcomm will not only sell you chips

Where do you draw the line between software and mathematics? Or mathematics in software? It’s a long slippery road that one...

Staff and students at Victoria University of Wellington learn the most important lesson of all: Keep your files backed up

bpfh

Re: The only things

About everyone I work with who is not an IT professional unfortunately. I’ve already told the story about the guy that saved his photos to his email’s “Deleted Items” bin and was gutted when I informed him - after he emptied it - that there was no way back, and he thought that “deleted items” actually meant “read items”, trendy the users who create files outside their expected directories, although this has got better over the years with Windows complaining of you create folders outside of your well known directories making backup easier when someone needs help with reinstalling and knows I’m lying when I tell them that I know nothing about this stuff...

Half a million stolen French medical records, drowned in feeble excuses

bpfh

Re: Drink water?

Ribs of Vienna - if it survives Covid - was awesome. Get ribs by the metre.

Also, Figlmuller for authentic wienerschnizel!

bpfh

Re: 8 glasses

2.5 litres a day = 0.4 footballs or 4.77 grapefruits. It’s not enough to register as a fraction of an Olympic swimming pool on the El Reg standards converter ( https://www.theregister.com/Design/page/reg-standards-converter.html )

bpfh

Re: Drink water?

Kentucky Fried Kitten had one which was 2 slices of fried chicken with the cheese and salad in the middle. Was awesome but it did look like something the dog brought up!

bpfh

Re: Drink water?

Bat is rarely on the menu in France, but mental note, don’t have it tartare or anything less than “bien cuit” in future.

BOFH: 7 jars of Marmite, a laptop and a good time

bpfh

Re: Surprise!

I thought the saliva test required electrocution...

bpfh
Trollface

Re: Surprise!

This is also done by infra red. Please bend over, take your mouse....

1Password has none, KeePass has none... So why are there seven embedded trackers in the LastPass Android app?

bpfh

Re: KeyPass as an alternative? Are you sure you didn't mean KeePass?

I have a copy of wordstar - v3 iirc. Last run on an OS/2 Warp vm of DOS 1.2 - if the floppy disk still works!!!

bpfh

Re: KeyPass as an alternative? Are you sure you didn't mean KeePass?

Only problem was keeping all my devices in synch between several OS on several laptops plus a mobile phone was a pain in the butt, especially if you have to add a password to your iPhone.

In any case time to give 1password a look. If I’m paying for a service (and I am paying for a family subscription of LastPass), it should not have any 3rd party trackers in it at all!

Apache foundation ousts TinkerPop project co-founder for tweeting 'offensive humor that borders on hate speech'

bpfh
Coffee/keyboard

Re: Hey, Apache Software Foundation ...

The Cherokees are moaning about Chrysler’s use of their tribe name as mentioned today on the BBC’s site, saying they do not feel honoured by having their tribe name on a car, so in that light, Hughes^M^M^MMcDonnell Douglas^M^M^MBoeing need to rename one of their helicopters, and the ASF needs to drop that same A. If you are going to be painfully petty and politically correct, you can’t have a two speed system.

Also, these codes of conduct to enforce PC, ensure people don’t rock the boat and toe the party line will only end in tears. I wonder what Jobs, Ballmer and Ellison would have become if they got their butts in a sling every time they went on a power-rant!

The wastepaper basket is on the other side of the office – that must be why they put all these slots in the computer

bpfh

Re: The human mind is a frightening thing

IBM Gold Service sales team. The sales guys with the high end pc’s and webcams - unheard of in the 90’s.

Mr star sales raises a support ticket as his pc won’t start.

Admits to me that maybe forcing the 20v power supply jack to his home speakers into the computers audio output rather than into the speakers may have burned out the mobo.

Yup. It did. No repercussions for that either.

bpfh

Re: Whoops mind your head if there is a fire, and dont trip

Reminds me of the area around Malaga in the 80’s. Construction for time-shares everywhere. All floors propped up by hundreds of tree branches while construction went on above. Not an acro as we know and love to be seen. A scary sight to behold...

Dangerous flying car drone zoomed into UK's Gatwick Airport airspace after killswitch failed

bpfh

Re: What the AAIB had to say

This could be quite fun actually: loading à volunteer into a light GRP shell surrounded by 4 unprotected meat sliders - each one within arms reach - with a questionable hand built control system and get them to fly around a track for 10 minutes.

A safer alternative sport would be soap box carts going down Bury Hill with swords stuck in the grass verge and barbed wire randomly stretched across the road.

Atheists warn followers of unholy data leak, hint dark deeds may have tried to make it go away

bpfh

Re: Just like the Peoples Fronts and Judea

As much as state schools have to follow religious guidelines dicated by the Representative and Reincarnation of God on Earth, Queen Elizabeth II, by the Grace of God, of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland and of her other realms and territories Queen, Head of the Commonwealth, Defender of the Faith, she does not come down from her throne and beat you with her orb and sceptre if you refuse to believe, you still have a freedom of religion - or to not have one, although when I was in primary school, getting rid of the assembly several times a week to sing hymns would have been nice...

You want me to do WHAT in that prepaid envelope?

bpfh
Headmaster

Re: Club 50+

I can thankfully confirm after living here for almost 30 years, that the only suppositories I have seen were infant paracetamol, and reserved for a specific use case. Other than that, the rumours about the french love of "suppos" is more of a joke than reality!!

Voyager 2 receives and executes first command in 11 months as sole antenna that reaches it returns to work

bpfh

Re: It's a different world

And all relying on one single “Jesus Nut” at the top of the rotors to keep all aforementioned 200 000 parts globally flying in the same formation rather than straight down...

Microsoft will release a web browser for Linux next month. Repeat, Microsoft will release a browser for Linux – and it uses Google's technology

bpfh

Stuff the browser I want MS Office on Linux!

(And let the flames and the downvotes begin)

No joy for Julian Assange as Uncle Sam confirms it will keep pushing for WikiLeaker's extradition to America

bpfh
WTF?

Quid pro quo

You open proceedings to extradite the American who's dangerous driving ran over and killed a cyclist who then fled justice to America under the pretext of diplomatic immunity, and we will open proceedings about people who only really publicly embarrassed you (Assange) & a multi-billion dollar company (Lynch), otherwise, jog on...

BOFH: Are you a druid? Legally, you have to tell me if you're a druid

bpfh

Re: armed robots...

That’s an evolution, “almost weapons grade devices”. I think that in the past it actually had weapons during a billing dispute with a supplier...

Don't break your swanky new Motorola Razr, you probably won't be able to get it fixed

bpfh

Re: I wish they brought back the original V3i RAZR

Ha, I know the feeling, replace RAZR with iPhone. Every 2 or 3 months almost everyone in our account management team had either managed to have their phone get lost, get stolen or get broken. Some of the "breakages" that happened when the phone "never left my pocket", including damage that strangely exactly matched the boot (trunk) locking lugs in the company car - I recognised the pattern from years ago when my CEO did the same with his brand new top of the line HP laptop - he at least admitted he slammed the boot without checking the bag was actually inside but I digress, and another one never left their suit, but had marks of a mountain bike tire straight up the middle, including mud and a bit of grass...

As soon as the company implemented a one replacement a year with either a police report for theft or handing in the broken device to warrant the free exchange, this dropped off to the odd breakage, with an honest explanation... Funny that.

Funnier still, when our department got sold off, the company phones were part of the sale, and new policy is you can get a phone, and the company pays for your complete subscription, and reimburses you up to 100 quid for what ever you up fronted for a new device or a renewal, there has only been 1 broken phone in 3 years across the whole company.

Google, Microsoft pitch in some spare change to keep Mozilla's Web Docs online bible alive

bpfh

Re: Niche skill

Oh, an old memory of finding in a cupboard 2 snap locked binders with volume one and two of the IBM C compiler. I didn’t think of snaffeling them. I now regret it, that and the unopened packs of OS/2 2.11 - just to show my grand kids what IT used to be now that I’ve become the dinosaur I used to joke about!!

bpfh

Re: Niche skill

Oh This. Have an upvote. VB6 days, the MSDN used to be a great repo of information and examples, and even some of the VC++ guys had examples of creating anonymous functions in VB allowing you function by function access to the win32 api. About 15 years ago, saved my bacon a couple of times.

Explained: The thinking behind the 32GB Windows Format limit on FAT32

bpfh
Mushroom

Being more like mac...

Use the extension to identify the file association and the icon to use in the background, and just display "my file" with say a corresponding word icon. It's something that I deactivate on each windows I use, but i will admit that it has stopped a lot of "what is X extension" or our account managers thinking that all the files on the desktop looked ugly so they took the extensions off the end, then after dillegently doing this for like 80 files, then come and complain that "all their files have gone" (but 80 "default" icons have taken their place) and they cannot figure out why suddently when they open "billing report" in notepad though it that was originally an Excel sheet, it displays hieroglyphs rather than their calculated bonuses and wailing that "this computer is sh*t, it's always breaking never does what it's supposed to...

Unfortunately they have got hold of forbidden litterature and found out what PEBSAK means...

I'll go take my pills now.

bpfh

Re: UID

2^32 = covers 0 to 4 billion - unless you are using signed whereby you can count from negative 2 billion subscriptions to positive 2 billion subscriptions. Does not solve the overall problem, but may push it off a bit.

bpfh
Headmaster

Future proofing size constraints

I remember a discussion with a developer in the late 90's who was designing gaming software for casinos, and I remember incrediously listening to him telling me that within 20 years we will have 2 tb storage on something the size of a finger nail.

Whelp, last year (dammit, year before last, we are 2021 now) Sandisk came out with a 1 terabyte microSD card. I suppose two stacked on top of each other would meet that 2tb definition given to me in 1997, yet in the days of when high tech was a 2 gb hard drive and 16 meg of RAM, 2 tb on a postage stamp was star trek science fiction.

So, I guess we should channel both Moore and his law, and Bill Gates and his 640k is enough for anyone, and actually not try to limit ourselves - Storage is always going to be bigger, and it's going to arrive faster than we think. Flexibility is key, and if you have absolutes, make sure they are actual technical ones - like 32 bits is always going to be 2 or 4 billion depending on signing, and not arbitrary "lets set this number limit at 10 million and call it a day". It will trip you up in database ID sequences just as bad as file system design one day in the - possibly not so distant - future!

Ever had a bogus call from someone claiming to be the IRS? A tax scam ringleader just got sent down for 20 years

bpfh
Trollface

Oooohhh

I need to remember this one :)

BOFH: Time for the MMOCC. You know, the Massively Moronic Online Christmas Call

bpfh
Flame

Cattle prods and electrical shenanigans

Are back!

Search history can calculate better credit ratings than pay slips, says International Monetary Fund

bpfh
Trollface

Ouch.....

Well, as people should know, even in private browsing mode, your network use is known by your ISP and your favorite search engine - if you are using Google, it can be scary to look at your history and see what you were looking up 10 or so years ago, as the Chocolate Factory certainly has this data squirreled away somewhere.

So, Lock Picking Lawyer, EURIon constellations, muzzle velocity, making black powder using bishop's urine, atomic bomb assembly, Freeman Dyson & design of chemical weapons.... Not only am I probably already on a ton of watchlists, but I would guess that this would preclude me totally from any loan as a danger to humanity!!!

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