Posts by Simon Harvey

Kraft cans Vegemite iSnack2.0

Who gives a rats abut the name ...

it tastes like shite. Complete shite.

I think some of the following would be more appropriate:

- Un-Austrailan

- Vegeshite

- Marmite (well we know it tastes like crap)

grrrrr

Vodafone pledges fix for Snow Leopard 3G modem woes

Similar Fix for E169s and Clean Installs

G'day Poms,

I had the same problem with the E169 on both Vodafone and Optus; made worse because I did a clean-and-install rather than an upgrade to Snow Leopard.

The issue is with the naff client software rather than the drivers themselves, so I posted a solution here: http://forums.whirlpool.net.au/forum-replies.cfm?t=1272603 (I've also just noticed Optus have posted a better solution at the same link which points you directly to the drivers on your USB key, rather than on the internet).

Irish politico in Facebook jub-rub outrage

Re: OK, fuck Canada

@Andrew: Julia Gillard as a milf?! Natasha Stott Despoja as a hottie? I think being in Canada has warped you somehow :-)

We do have one hot pollie left - a Ms. Kate Ellis, who is the Minister for Youth and Sport: http://www.kateellis.com.au/contact/

I'm off to renew my Irish passport now, think a voting trip may be in order ...

Aussies backtrack on firewall plans

Conroy's background ...

If you want a laugh, Senator Conroy was destroyed on the ABC's Q&A programme the week before. I actually had a really good question accepted but couldn't get my webcam to work in time. But it went along the lines of how did Conroy feel about Australia being included on Reporters Sans Frontier's watchilist of "potential enemies of the Internet" and elevated to the same level as Yemen and Sri Lanka. One bloke asked him if he believed 1984 was a novel or an instructional manual. Transcript and download of the show here: http://www.abc.net.au/tv/qanda/txt/s2521164.htm

More importantly, we should also be aware that Conroy wasn't born here. He was actually born in Ely, UK. Bloody Poms coming over here and restricting our internet. Must be your revenge for losing the Ashes series every time (except once recently, which was quite funny really).

:-)

BBC Click paid cybercrooks to buy botnet

For those of us OUTSIDE of the mother country ...

... you can watch the episode here: http://www.bbcworldnews.com/Pages/ProgrammeMultiFeature.aspx?id=18 or on BBC World (or whatever the hell they call it now).

'Bloody' is an offensive word, declares ASA

PS: to Bloody Oath

A typical Australian TV advert: http://theinspirationroom.com/daily/2006/inghams-chicken-swearing/

Also, wtf are the pommy government moaning about. Wasn't it Tony Blair who, when he landed in Canberra to meet our government, said in a jetlagged and weary voice: "Where the bloody hell am I?" (Which, to be fair, is what most of us say when we go to Canberra - think Milton Keynes full of Pollies and you've got our capital city).

OK ... final PS ...

Some analysis on the use of the word "bloody" in TV adverts ...

http://www.pingudownunder.com/blog/2007/10/12/why-we-curse-bloody-aye-and-origin-of-the-word-pom/

Bloody Oath!

hahahaha ... how stuck up are they.

Trying to resist making obvious jokes about the state of English Rugby after being destroyed by both the Wallabies and the Kangaroos ... in retaliation for the gold medal count ...*

Simon (an ex-Pom himself), Australia

* Goodonya to the Welsh though.

Police vet live music, DJs for 'terror risk'

wtf? UK Music chief Feargal Sharkey?

*please* tell me this is the same Feargal Sharkey that was the 80s crooner singing about "A Good Heart"?

omg - it seems so: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Feargal_Sharkey

Skiving Aussie fingered on Facebook

It's a Hoax

http://www.news.com.au/story/0,27574,24549798-421,00.html

just checked on FB ...

... and the photo is the same but his privacy settings are on so can't verify. He is part of the Australia network though.

Daylight savings shift to cause phone havoc Down Under

QUEENSLANDER

Queenslanders are proud that we can't be stuffed messing about with time zones at any time of the year. Its something that the Mexican states do - whatever. They can keep that terrible AFL game as well.

Messing about with the clocks means 2 minutes of drinking time being lost. Can't have that can we, especially with the drought.

OMFG, what have you done?

Moans from Down Under

<AOLer> me too </AOLer>

Not too keen on the new masthead/logo (is El Reg turning into The Sun?); definately lose the fixed width; and bring back the old comment icons.

Otherwise its all good, mate. Now I'm off to flame my gallah. Strewth!

Oz carrier Primus blitzed by DDoS attack

2nd to Telstra? yeah nah!

yeah right - Optus is the second major carrier in Oz not iPrimus. Optus is owned by SingTel.

Kudos to the bloke above for stealing my Aussie chatup line:

Me: Fancy an Aussie Kiss?

Hottie: *thump* *pause* Whats that?

Me: Like a French Kiss but Down Under.

Hottie: *look of disgust and walks away* *comes back later* onyamate

Independent dubs El Reg lesbian

But I'm a lesbian ...

... in a bloke's body.

Obligatory Paris icon added.

Vodafone sews up iPhone distribution

Vodafone has 3G in Australia ...

... well I think it does anyway, according to my handset I have a 3G connection (or a 3.5G if in Sydney and Melbourne).

I wouldn't class Australia as a "secondary market", more of a technology-savvy market where new technologies can be trialled before making larger investments in countries that can't play cricket, for example.

I reckon we'll get the 3G iPhone first ...

:-)

An Ex-Pom-now-turned-'straylian

Beer set to hit four quid a pint

Its OK for you poms ...

... down in 'straya our problem is that we don't have enough water to make the beer in the first place. Couple that with the ongoing drought (double whammy - crops failing and the fact it takes 4 pints of water to make a pint of beer) means that our national staple diet is going to go through the roof. its bad enough paying $5 for a schooner (about 2/3 of a pint) already.

The biggest consumer of water in SEQ (http://www.qwc.qld.gov.au/Water+restriction) is the XXXX brewery. If they cut the supply to that you're looking at a revolution here. There's no bloody way we're drinking that VB or Fosters crap.

B3ta served DMCA notice for Photoshop Prince challenge

Satire/Parody - something that the Yanks (and Websheriff) don't understand?

am not a lawyer so don't trust me - yadayadayada

Did a quick google and found this question on MeFI - http://ask.metafilter.com/11615/. If you can argue that b3ta is a work of parody then you're protected from these fsckwits under US law:

To be considered parody, the work must "reasonably be perceived as commenting on the original or criticizing it, to some degree" (U.S. Supreme Court, Campbell v. Acuff-Rose Music - http://caselaw.lp.findlaw.com/scripts/getcase.pl?court=US&vol=000&invol=u10426).

Criticising Prince, of course, should be enshrined in law as a human right anyway.

Oz motorist reacts rather testily to small todger slur

But its not been asked yet ...

... why was she making the pinkie gesture? Sorry, but even chicks in Sydney aren't shallow enough to do the gesture at random without reason.

I suspect the bloke in question have been acting like a hoon, driving dangerously and being a tw@t - probably all three at the same time (particularly if he was driving across the bridge and still had time to throw a bottle out of the window - obviously not concentrating on his driving.

Good on her. And the Magistrate should be shamed for not asking the above question.

Oz barmaid fined for crushing beer cans between jubs

Aussie Aussie Aussie

nice to see that us Aussies get a fair reporting on a pommy website. As an ex-Pom-who-has-seen-the-light-and-become-an-Aussie I am digusted at the level of "negative" reporting by the Reg.

Anyway on to more important stuff. Does anyone have her phone number, think we need to invite her over here to Queensland to invesitgate wether ...um ... it is still a crime in this state.

Unimpressed Sheilas mock boy racers' todgers

@Anonymous Cowards @lglethal

Onya lglethal.

Having lived here for 3 years, i can agree that the hoons down under are absolute fckwits who don't have any common sense. And - given that most of them are young males aged 16-25 who "know better" than everyone else, the only thing that they will listen to is usually young female hotties.

Fully agree that Darwinian Selection comes into play - if they want to kill themselves thats fine. But If it saves even only one (innocent) life then it's money well spent.

Australian court rings to the sound of satisfaction

yeah ... nah ...

... Ipswitch is in SE Queensland not far from Brisbane (or Brissie). Only a true Queenslander would have the nerve (a.k.a. "i dont' give a rat's about authority") to have that ringtone. I'm suprised that he even bothered to turn it off, unless of course he was in the dock.

More info here: http://www.news.com.au/couriermail/story/0,23739,22523472-952,00.html

Cheers

Simon

Aussie bin Laden penetrates APEC security

nah ...

Jasper is not worshipped here, i don't think the ABC even show him anymore.. but nobody watches it anyway, except for the Chasers.

BTW ... Botany Bay is where the airport is. Sydney's CBD and harbour is on Port Stephen.

So what's in a URL? The Reg URL?

Vote for .co.uk - and theregister.us - make .com global and not american!

Need to keep it.co.uk. The yanks generally don't understand our sarcastic humour. Need to give them a clue.

If you fancy starting up theregister.com.au and want to give me a job, I'm up for that. Already live there.