Posts by jake

Spent the weekend watching Game of Thrones? You're a FAT LONELY SADDO

@ Richard 81 (was:Re: The credentials of the authors of the paper ...)

"If they had a PhD in sandwich making, would you still take their conclusions seriously?

Again, their credentials don't necessarily negate the observation.

Hey, ElReg (was:@dogged(was: Re: @Don Dumb)))

Why the fuck was THAT post nixed? Does ElReg approve of parents referring to their kids as "little shits", and disapprove of non-family members feeling sorry for the kid(s) involved (through no fault of their own) in said family relationship?

@ dan1980 (was:Re: The credentials of the authors of the paper ...)

Wow. Nice screed.

You might have convinced yourself, but you haven't convinced me.

The credentials of the authors of the paper ...

... don't automagically negate the observation.

I'm no fan of advertising, it all sucks.

However, hibernating in front of your TV for a weekend is just plain sad.

How Pivotal cracked the one-billion-dollar code

Unfortunately ...

... the pumps don't work because the vandals stole the handles.

Robert Zimmerman was right, even if he didn't know it at the time.

Atlassian HipChat service popped

@ Nigel The Pigeon (was: Re: Popped)

Yes, Nigel. We know. Thank you. But not exactly my question, now was it?

@C. (was: Re: "Popped"?)

Ok, if you say so.

Where, exactly, did the term come from? Honestly, I'm curious.

(We used to use "rooted", is this politically incorrect in Aus?)

"Popped"?

There's a term I've never seen in this context ... Did I miss a meme somewhere?

BURIED: Oz gov won't reveal telcos' guess at data retention costs

Once again ...

... The Australian Government demonstrates for the rest of the planet just exactly why politics and computer technology don't mix.

Google PRECOGS to pay researchers before they find software flaws

US$3133.70?

Less than half a week's pay (when I work for a multi-national)?

No thanks. Have fun being exploited, kids.

Drunk on Friday night? Then YOU probably DIDN'T spot Facebook's privacy tweak

Uh, no. I wasn't drunk on Friday Night.

Nor did I notice anything on facebook. Not that I ever do.

Tango UP – Google graduates 3D tablet from the labs

OH LOOK, A COOL DEVICE!

Is it shiny? Can I look at funny cats with it? Is it shinier/cooler than my iFad?

IMO, all this shiny kit needs to go powder it's nose ...

Cisco simplifies software licences, by selling them under three programs

Personally, I use BSD ...

... on non-proprietary kit, where most folks use Cisco.

No muss, no fuss.

National Lottery sleeps through Sunday

Perhaps @TNLUK briefly had misgivings because ...

... the lottery is a tax on idiots who can't do math(s), and they were ashamed.

But then common sense took over, and TNLUK will continue fleecing the populous.

BYOD is NOT the Next Biggest Thing™: Bring me Ye Olde Lappetoppe

@ P. Lee (was: Re: Evolution?)

/dev/random was the misbegotten child of /dev/null and /dev/zero ... From nothingness came randomness.

Thus the wonderfulness we have today. All praise /dev

"BYOD" actually stands for "Break Your Own Defenses".

Search on "jake +BYOD" here on ElReg ... It's been my mantra since BYOD became a meme amongst the technologically clueless corporate mindset, a little over two and a half years ago.

Post-pub nosh neckfiller: Sizzling sag aloo

Aloo is "classic" Indian food? Really?

When exactly did spuds get to India? By this logic, I guess that tomatoes are classic Italian, vanilla is classicly from Madagascar, Chocolate comes from Holland, Coffee comes from Jamaica and Pineapples come from Hawai'i.

Living with a Renault Twizy: Pah! Bring out the HOVERCRAFT

Methinks the wife&I's tandem bicycle ...

... is a lot more cost effective, usable, environmentally friendly, etc. than the Twizy. In all departments. Initial cost, range "on a charge", park-ability, maintenance costs, longevity, bail-out-ability when idiots in cages do something stupid, etc.

HP: We're gonna book $1bn worth of Server 2003 sales THIS WEEK

@AC"20hrs" (whatever that means, ElReg) (was:Re: WTF?)

What part of "right mind" did you fail to comprehend?

WTF?

Who in their right mind would buy into this?

El Reg Redesign - leave your comment here.

Re: @ diodesign (was:where did everyone go?)

"I am not able rightly to apprehend the kind of confusion of ideas that could provoke such a question."

The idea is to get it right the first time[0] for the intended audience. If they complain, listen to them. Don't send them "out back", to a "just in case" interface. Comprehend[1] yet?

[0] Preferably with pilot, alpha & beta tester folks who actually use the site.

[1] Reading between the lines, not trying to cause confusion ...

@ diodesign (was:Re: where did everyone go?)

You are arguing against actual computer users who understand interface design, in favo(u)r of the 1D10T GreatUnwashed who have zero clue beyond their fondle-slab?

Really? What has ElReg come to?

@romanempire

"The 'Expand comments' crap forces me back to the mouse which doesn't help my RSI!"

Indeed. I don't have that problem, but my daughter's hubby does.

"The Register: Biting the eyes that read IT"

How about "starting to bite, in the world of IT"?

Seriously, ElReg, listen to your users. We pay your bills.

Privacy alert: Outlook for iOS does security STUPIDLY, says dev

::giggles::

The Nintendo generatiion writing software for the iFad generation.

What could possibly go wrong?

Drinking to forget? OK. But first, eat a curry... QUICK!

@Sirius (was: Re: What causes the runs?)

Gut feeling?[0]

The problem is the lack of proper diet in the first place, PROBABLY caused by entirely too much fast-food[1] and not enough fiber & veggies. The Wife & I have no diarrhea/gas issues with this kind of food, nor do we get the supposed "ring of fire".

[0] If you'll pardon the expression in this context.

[1] I suspect it's the fat and salt, combined with entirely too much simple sugar, active yeast and actual alcohol. YMMV. Enjoy your ... err ... bliss.

Hmmm ...

"If you've had the kind of Patch Tuesday that ends in a mass attack of BSODs, new vulns in Java and someone advertising your routes as traversing Norfolk Island ..."

Uh ... I think I divested myself of all that half a decade ago.

Redmond-free, since Jan 1st, 2010.

Your anonymous code contributions probably aren't: boffins

Re: @ Kristian Walsh (was: object orientated)

Again, not everything compiled with a "C++" compiler is actually written in C++.

HTH, HAND.

Re: @ Kristian Walsh (was: object orientated)

No, Kristian, my ears are quite clear of bogus marketing bullshit.

But then I code close to silicon, not close to marketing memes.

For me, GCC spits out assembler. I hand massage it. My customers are happy.

Re: @ Kristian Walsh (was: object orientated)

Symbian? There's a fail. And it was/is all K&R C.

scmRTOS? That's all K&R C.

miosix? "supports" C++ ... Straight C otherwise.

C++ is indeed a superset of C. That doesn't mean that everything compiled with a "C++" compiler is actually written in C++.

@ Kristian Walsh (was: Re: object orientated)

"C++ code runs exactly as fast as the equivalent C code"

Uh ... no. Show me real-time code that is written in C++.

@Dan 55 (was: Re: @Dan 55 (was: C++ ...))

"If the code doesn't have to hit the hardware"

WTF? Code doesn't run in a vacuum, code tells hardware what to do.

@AC "21 hrs" (whatever that means, ElReg)Re: C++ ...

"You can recognize a personality in any language."

OK, I'll bite.

"It takes me a few split seconds to look at a piece of the Linux kernel code"

Find me. I've been contributing to the Linux kernel for over two decades.

Re: @Dan 55 (was: C++ ...)

"The remainder are C, or Objective-C for less performance-critical ones."

So the "performance-critical ones" are written in C? Seems to negate the entire rest of your post. Think about it.

"As it is, Cupertino's current device driver and I/O layer is written in C++, and so are many of the low-level libraries unique to OS X."

And the bugs creep in where, exactly? It ain't in the kernel ...

"But, going back to kernels: The reason why the BSD kernel is written in C is because AT&T's UNIX kernel was written in C, and that was because C was the language that K&R developed specifically to allow their UNIX OS to be portable across AT&T's various system architectures."

What you are forgetting (or ignoring) is that nobody has invented anything better than K&R for cross-platform kernel development. It's not inertia, it's reality.

@Dan 55 (was: Re: C++ ...)

"the average program does not."

There's another problem. I was talking about fast, secure code. Not average code. See the difference?

C++ ...

... there's your problem. Too much room for personality.

K&R C and assembler tell the hardware what to do, and don't leave much room for personality to stand out ... at least not when done right. And the result is a hell of a lot faster (and arguably safer from a security standpoint) than code written in C++.

(Before you try to argue with me, ask Cupertino what their kernel is written in.)

What gets the internet REALLY excited? Kittens? No. EXPLODING Kittens

You crack me up, Mr. Pott

When you put your opinion into the public domain, you should have the cajones/backbone to back up that opinion when someone calls you on it.

Or you can simply nix this post (as you did the other two), bury your head in the sand, and try to convince yourself that you actually know what you are talking about.

ElReg? How about not allowing authors to moderate posts to their own articles?

Post-pub nosh neckfiller: Chickpea stew à la Bureau des Projets Spéciaux

@Chris W (was: Re: Boil pancetta (note splelling)?)

"few people in Sonoma are an authority on Spanish spelling"

Uh ... OK. If you say so. Might want to look up and understand the meaning of "Alta California". And then come visit my foreman, whose family has been here for at least seven generations.

Re: Boil pancetta (note splelling)?

Occasionally you'll boil the small-end of the ham in a soup or stew so as to not waste the wonderfulness that is pig. But it's not really a major part of Cozido.

"Panceta is the correct spelink."

Not where I make it.

Re: Boil pancetta (note splelling)?

""remove rind and feed to dogs""

Oh. You don't know how to make pancetta. Thank you for the clarification. When done right, it's all human food.

But BOILING preserved pork? Would you boil jamón ibérico or jamón serrano? And which part of either of these would you feed to the dawgs?

Boil pancetta (note splelling)?

Remove rind & discard?

Heathen.

Oi, Aussie sports fans! Take that selfie stick and stick it

Here in Sonoma, we're a trifle more polite ...

... "Would you like me to take that picture for you, so it's framed properly?" is a (fairly) common question around the Plaza.

You'd be surprised how many people get pissed off when they immediately assume that their photography skills are being dissed.

'One day, YOU won't be able to SENSE the INTERNET,' vows Schmidt

In other words ...

... Schmidt is a corporate biggie-wiggie marketard with no actual concept of how tehintrawebtubes actually work, and is listening to peon marketards who also have zero concept of how tehintrawebtubes work.

Gee. Whodathunkit.

Google. Shun them. It's a slow-motion train wreck in progress.

SUPERHANDS! Fossils of early human ancestors reveal a GRIPPING development

Sadly, several million years later ...

... all ElReg+readers find a use for this is one/zero "thumbs".

Bloody waste of evolution, that.

4Chan man Moot logs off as admin for last time

Was 4chan ever useful?

Given the existence of Usenet, that's probably a moot point ;-)

Netadmin wanted for 'terrible, terrible, awful job nobody wants'

No.

I'll happily take the gig to fix the problem later, though ;-)

Ta for the tip, ElReg! I'll keep an eye on the clusterfuck.

New York State plots broadband future

@AC "2 days" (whatever that means, ElReg) Was: Re: Words, words, words

"Yes - NYC is soooo much older than London, Paris, Rome, or Tokyo."

When it comes to internet access, why yes. Yes it is.

In certain neighborhoods, anyway.

@ Radelix (was: Re: Go ask New Jersey)

"This was more in the vain of the early 90's when NJ" dot dot dot.

.gov does't get more vain than NJ politicians ...

@ Dan Paul (was: Re: EVERY city's infrastructure is old)

The REAL problem in hamster-house-collectives like NYC is that yanking out all the completely overloaded copper cable tracks and replacing it with fiber would probably take down land-line capability of tens of millions for up to two months per user account.

Ain't going to happen. If you want connectivity, move to the 'burbs. If you can afford to rent in NYC, you can probably purchase[1] a home in NJ, less than half an hour outside Manhattan.

[1] As apposed to throwing away your money on rent ...

Remember back when "Broadband" ...

... meant frequency division multiplexing, not "as many bits per second as I can personally get"?

How many frequency divisions, exactly, does your so-called "broadband" system operate across? And in what frequency spectrum are they running, exactly, Cuomo?

Kids these days. No clues at all, just believers in marketing hype.

$500 TEDDY BEAR teaches tots to spit up personal data

@Sweep (was: Re: @JDX (was: Nearly 60 years ago, my parents started raising me.))

You wonder: "What do you reckon the infant mortality rate was 100,000 years ago?"

I dunno. Do we have stats from an electronic 100,000 year old teddy-bear? Until you can answer that, the question is pretty much moot, at least in this scenario & in this forum.