* Posts by eswan

90 posts • joined 29 Oct 2010


Square peg of modem won't fit into round hole of PC? I saw to it, bloke tells horrified mate


Re: *Hisses & wards against Evil*

Would not suprise me in the least. Had a Legend 486dx33 come into the shop for diagnostics. The top of the cpu had been sanded. Held at the right angle to the light and you could see the 25Mhz markings.


Re: DIMM Slots

Remember those notebook docks where you slid open a door on the back of the notebook, put it on a couple of locating pins and throw a lever to push it into the 50-billion pin connector? I had to inform a user that it worked better if you opened the sliding door first. Although, to give her credit, she almost made it through the plastic.

From Amanda Holden to petrol-filled water guns: It has been a weird week for 5G


Re: The B Ark.

And Europe is going to be wiped out due to a lack of telephone sanitizers.

IBM's outgoing boss Rometty awarded $20m+ in 2019 for growing revenue 0.1%


Re: Her times were among the WORST for growth...

This chart says it all-


Going Dutch: The Bakker Elkhuizen UltraBoard 950 Wireless... because looks aren't everything


qwerty row offset?

Anybody notice the odd offset to the querty row? Looks like it's lined up verticaly with the zxcvb row, 'Y' being directly above 'B'. Seems like the kind of thing that would really trip me up.

Microsoft's little eyes light up as Oscar-winning Taika Waititi says Apple keyboards make him 'want to go back to PCs'


Why does that picture of a C64 keyboard have 2 CRSR up/down keys? For some reason, that really bugs me.

BSOD Burgerwatch latest: Do you want fries with that plaintext password?



Nah, it stands for X-Pest-Aging. Its the file share where they archive bugsfixes.

Ever wondered what Microsoft really thought about the iPad? Ex-Windows boss spills beans


> "Microsoft was a tablet pioneer. The company released Windows XP Tablet Edition in 2003 – seven years before the iPad"

I've still got a Toshiba T200 running Windows for Pen Computing 3.1, from about 10 years before that. Battery even still holds a charge. Back in the day, I had it up and running with a Raytheon Aviator wireless card and Mosaic 2.0.0b4.

Windows 7 back in black as holdouts report wallpaper-stripping shenanigans


Re: My Windows desktop is black...

Same here, but has the sun directly behind it.

Amazon straightens up its IoT house, complete with virtual Alexa, ahead of Las Vegas shindig


Re: Smart toilet seats

Fecal Recognition

Gospel according to HPE: And lo, on the 32,768th hour did thy SSD give up the ghost


"We are currently notifying customers of the need to install this update as soon as possible. Helping our customers to remediate this issue is our highest priority."

Well, the ones with up-to-date service contracts at least.

Physicists are rather giddy after creating a rare type of laser using laughing gas


“Now we’re saying they can be small, tunable, and much more efficient. You could fit this in your backpack, or in your vehicle for wireless communication or high-resolution imaging. Because you don’t want a cyclotron in your car.”

I don't?

They terrrk err jerrrbs! Vodafone replaces 2,600 roles with '600 bots' in bid to shrink €48bn debt


Re: we have already reduced 2,600 roles

Well, I'd hope so! Why would you want phreakers working at the phone company?

You'e yping i wong: macOS Catalina stops Twitter desktop app from accepting B, L, M, R, and T in passwords


Steve Ballmer

Dry patch? Have you considered peppering your flirts with emojis?


Re: Why can't we use emojis when...

And don't call us Shirley. We're a different demographic, altogether.


Sad SACK: Linux PCs, servers, gadgets may be crashed by 'Ping of Death' network packets


I'm disappointed...


"SACK Slowness, aka CVE-2019-5599, which affects FreeBSD 12 using the RACK TCP stack"


Good heavens, is it time to patch Cisco kit again? Prime Infrastructure root privileges hole plugged


Nah. Cisco's had 'undisclosed technician accounts' in their systems since at least the mid '90s. By this point I figure the simplest answer is that it's ingrained in their corporate culture to have backdoors in their equipment.

Let's check in with our friends in England and, oh good, bloke fined after hiding face from police mug-recog cam


"...it was estimated the technology had a whopping 98 per cent false positive rate."

That's not a facial recognition system. That's an excuse to harass anybody they feel like harassing system. Might as well use a motion detector and a lamp labeled 'Bad guy sensor'.

The peelable, foldable phone has become the great white whale of tech


Nobody said it yet?


You're folding it wrong.

US states join watchdog probing CenturyLink's Xmas data center outage that screwed 911 system


Somebody plugged a 4-mbit card into a 16-mbit ring?

... turned off spanning tree protocol?

2018 ain't done yet... Amazon sent Alexa recordings of man and girlfriend to stranger


Re: ""We ... took measures to further optimize our processes."

Pray we do not optimize them more.

Microsoft readies the swatter as more bugs wriggle out of the Windows 10 woodwork


"The paranoid, or those still clinging to the glory days of Windows Media Center, might regard this as evidence of an attempt to remove the aged player from the OS once and for all."

More like pieces falling off as the OS rattles off into the sunset.

Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean hackers won't nuke your employer into the ground tomorrow


Of course there is an xkcd for that.


Cray's pre-exascale Shasta supercomputer gets energy research boffins hot under collar


Where do you put the quarters?

(google image search for 'shasta vending machine')

Pirate radio = drug dealing and municipal broadband is anti-competitive censorship


Ministry of Free Press - MinPress

Sorry friends, I'm afraid I just can't quite afford the Bitcoin to stop that vid from leaking everywhere


I got one of these this week. Well, actually it was addressed to the web server but I handle the email for it. So I guess the web server was browsing porn? Maybe pictures of servers with their covers off? Oh wait, maybe that was me.

Seagate passes gassy 14TB whopper: He He He, one for each of you


"IronWolf Pro, supporting up to 24-bay NAS enclosures, capacity ranges from 2TB to 14B, while the ordinary IronWolf, supporting one- to 8-bay enclosures, goes from 1TB to 14TB."

So if you put the regular IronWolf in a 9-bay enclosure, does it spontaneously combust?

Intel hands first Optane DIMM to Google, where it'll collect dust until a supporting CPU arrives


"...features AI-focused Deep Learning Boost (DLBOOST) tech intended to provide an 11x AI performance boost over Xeon Skylake."

Is that the replacement for NetBurst Technology?

The last phablet? 6.4in Samsung Galaxy Note 9 leaves you $1k lighter, needs 'water cooling'


So with the 512 GB version of this, plus a 512 GB micro sd, you could have a phone with a terabyte of storage....

Supermicro breathes in, shimmies a PB of Intel flash into one rack unit


That's alot of porn.

Cracking the passwords of some WPA2 Wi-Fi networks just got easier


Re: Nice Model M KB in piccie

Looks at pic. Looks at desk.

Better get your monitor calibrated.

(Model M F5-F8 are greyish)

Span hits F#, LinkedIn gets mumbly, and UWP (yes, it's still clinging on) furnished with new toys


"Universal Windows Platform (UWP) apps have a noble goal."

Oh, that's what UWP stands for. Thought it was "Ugly Windows Phone app".

US voting systems (in Oregon) potentially could be hacked (11 years ago) by anybody (in tech support)


Also equally valid--

"It is also critical to understand that this remote connection support model was never used, nor was it ever possible to be used, on any printer, as printers do not contain the required operating system or remote connection software necessary to enable a remote connection," the vendor tells Wyden.

"To be clear, ES&S never installed remote connection software on any printer it has ever delivered to a customer, nor has it ever been possible to do so- either before or after the creation of the EAC."

Now the device that manages, configures, and controls the printer....

LocationDumb: Phone tracker foul-up exposes world+dog to tracking


Re: I give up

>> Tossing all my electronics and will pick up trash for a living (no shortage of that ever)

They've already automated the 'lift the bin and dump it in the truck' part. All they need now are self driving garbage trucks.

Heir to SMS finally excites carriers, by making Google grovel


Re: Just what the world needs

"Yet another messaging system.."

You mean "Yet another advertising platform.."

BOFH: But I did log in to the portal, Dave


Who's got the RAT on my system

Ok, yesterday trying to do some SSL certificate management.

The unamed SSL issuer sends me a link and a username/temp password for their portal

Go to the link, login with the username and temp password, get prompted for old/new/new password.

Type those in, get a 'your session has been terminated, login again'.

Try to login with username/new password. 'invalid'

Try again to login with username/new password. 'invalid'

Maybe I used different capitalization? 'account locked out for 15 minutes'

15 minutes later. Maybe the new password didn't take? username/oldpassword, 'you must change your password now'.

enter old/new/new password. 'your session has expired'

I'm not falling for it this time, login with username/old password.

'you must change your password now'.

enter _really quickly_ old/new/new password.

'you must now set up 3 security questions'

go through that, 'your session has expired'

login again with new password. 'you must now set up 3 security questions'

run through the 3 security questions as quickly as possible. 'you must now give a phone number for 2 factor authentication'

give it my cell number. 'please enter the recieved pin'

Type in the pin. 'your session has expired'


Some joker set the session timeout to about 30 seconds.

It's US Tax Day, so of course the IRS's servers have taken a swan dive


Have they tried turning--

"the agency is hoping a hard reboot of its systems will resolve the issue"

Ah, well then. That should sort it out.

ZTE now stands for 'zero tech exports' – US govt slaps 7-year ban on biz


Pot, kettle

"ZTE made false statements to the US government when they were originally caught and put on the Entity List, made false statements during the reprieve it was given, and made false statements again during its probation," said US Secretary of Commerce Wilbur Ross.

Who do they think they are, banking executives?

From wikipedia--

"... leaked documents known as the Paradise Papers showed that Ross had failed to clearly disclose financial ties to Russian interests in his confirmation hearings."

UK mobe network Three's profits hit by IT upgrade costs


Ka-shing out?

Microsoft floats feelers for fake worlds


First read through of the title was interpreted as "Microsoft floats feelers for fake Words" and I thought it was going to be a VR version of Word.

Brit semiconductor tech ended up in Chinese naval railgun – report


Do they make zhou-zhou trains?

Devs see red after not seeing Big Red on Stack Overflow database poll


"the Oracle-developed, but open-source MySQL"

You misspelled purchased.

Microsoft to rebuild Redmond campus, including cricket pitch


The Campus Formerly Known As Metro

Official Secrets Act alert went off after embassy hired local tech support


>One such trip involved “four of us sitting around a cage full of monkeys,

>feeding them fruit” because one of the simians had swallowed a USB

>drive that contained classified files.

You should always mount a scratch monkey before copying files.

Hackers abusing digital certs smuggle malware past security scanners


From signedmalware.org-

Serial Number Publisher Issuer

00ACDB7F6460A6B323B6D2EAD85BC30CA6 Reg Revenue COMODO Code Signing CA 2


First iPhone X fondlers struggle to admit that Face ID sort of sucks


Rectal scan.

Super Cali goes ballistic, Gatorade app is bogus: Even the sound of it is something quite atrocious


It's got Electrolytes!

Python explosion blamed on pandas


> How did the pandas get explosives?

From the guerrillas, duh.

Microsoft drops Office 365 for biz. Now it's just Microsoft 365. Word


"We are transforming the way we partner with you," corporate VP Ron Huddleston intoned.

"Pray we do not transform it further".

OLE-y hell. Bug in MSFT Word allows total PC p0wnage


Re: Blocking this attack?

I've just dropped a squid proxy rule into place-

acl mimeblock rep_mime_type ^application/hta$

Might be a bit naive, but won't hurt. And I don't see

any legitimate reason to allow them.



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