Posts by Jon Double Nice

In case you're not already sick of Spectre... Boffins demo Speculator tool for sniffing out data-leaking CPU holes

They should've called it

Speculum...

Hacker exposed bank loophole to buy luxury cars and a face tattoo

Re: ACID, I blame ACID

My guess is a batch job that runs at midnight, which blocks any new ledger entries being processed until its finished.

Jay-Z freestyle attack on Tidal's rivals leaked to Tidal's rivals

I think its a name problem

Look, 'Tidal' is short and snappy, but it has too many vowels between the sylables. He should've called it TDL, or something, and made some of the letters caps and other not, or added an extra bit of punctuation, like t:Dl then you get a big grinny face in the middle. And the lower case t looks a bit like a hat like the rappers wear.

You know, the rappers? They run down the wall, next to the thing. It's a bit like a bus shelter, but not. Where the shopping trolleys go, and they run down the wall and. The rappers. You know them?

Say goodbye to the noughties: Yesterday’s hi-fi biz is BUSTED, bro

Re: multiroom

This actually works very well. When I were lad I actually had a 'multihouse' system which my neighbours didn't really seem to appreciate quite as much as I did.

Apple plans to waggle iNormous 4½-incher in fanbois' faces

How about MOBE

rather than just mobe, so mobe is normal, MOBE is big/VPL/phablet?

You can add exclamation points to indicate larger phones, so a MOBE!!! would be bigger than a MOBE! And phones in between MOBE and mobe could be MOBE? if its just a bit bigger.

Spock-style gadget can SMELL my PEE! Weird gizmos of CES 2014

HDMI overlay

If memory serves correct, you can overlay stuff onto an existing HDMI signal traveling down a wire, you just can't extract the existing video.

I might have imagined that though...

Jokesters develop new cryptocurrency using Kanye West's face

And remember

She's NOT a Hobbit, ya?

What is thy bidding? Han Solo’s shooter goes under the hammer

If you're interested

I haz some magic beans you can buy, just £1000 each to you guv, you got an honest face.

Acorn’s would-be ZX Spectrum killer, the Electron, is 30

Re: These articles make me so sad ..

Oh, what I would've give to be able to write it out in long hand on my bedroom floor and type it up on a BBC B and save it to floppy.

I had to scrawl my project onto scraps of sack, huddled in the coal cellar where I were kept, then etc etc etc...

Boffin blends benevolent beer

Re: Beer == energy drink?

If that's what grapes your squildo....

Violent Hamlet 'bard' by British Library Wi-Fi filters

Re: Well...

Is that a fetish?

Can't agree on a coding style? Maybe the NEW YORK TIMES can help

In Objective-C

can't you imply/omit the curly braces using indentation after the if(), Python stylee? I quite like that.

Russia's post-Snowden spooks have not reverted to type

Re: Why laugh?

Here's an article about the keystroke capture thing:

http://www.berkeley.edu/news/media/releases/2005/09/14_key.shtml

I guess it should be able to use it for typewriters as well.

Bad Vibes, man: Babble app chaps unwrapped in phish trap hack flap

Not being funny right

But if I you're making a messaging app-ma-bob, don't you sort of need some of those details in your db. You know, for your users, and for routing messages and things. Or did I miss something here?

Titsup Apple Developer Centre mystery: Database interloper fingered

Refresh Button is one of those new made up drugs

you know, a bit like CAKE

Apple patents touch display that KNOWS YOU by your fingers

Re: What if you don't have fingerprints?

This is actually a possibility.... Working with clay on a potters wheel can wear your fingerprints away so that you have smooth fingertips.

PRISM scandal: Brit spooks operated within the law, say politicos

Re: "Operated within the law"

Most people like eating cake

NSA hacked China's top carriers in hunt for SMS data - report

Re: Stuart Longland Stuart Longland Pot, meet Kettle

I was going to say that you missed out 'sheeple' in your earlier post, but I see that you've used it now - excellent work!

Short-staffed website swaps DOGS for DEVELOPERS

All the good talent goes to petsovernight.com

http://www.rockstargames.com/grandtheftauto3/petsOvernight/

Slim Shady wannabe Zuck's Facebook 'STOLE' MY SONG - Eminem

Don't policemen look young nowadays

In other news, has anybody noticed Professor Green's accent has changed a little bit seeing as he comes from Hackney and all that.

Galaxy S4 radiant, but has black holes

Re: iPhone 5 still leading the market.

I have an iphone 5

I am still flabbergasted at how pants the map app is.

Peak Apple: First 'profit slip' in a decade - and, boy, it's gonna be BIG

Re: Poor results?

whatball now?

Do you have an analogy using twiglets or something that might be meaningful?

Tax man to take a bite of tech employees' free meals?

Re: Depends on the country

Where do I have to work to gt these bags of acorns?

GoPro accused of using DMCA to take down product review

Maybe GoPro should

make cameras that don't look stupid mounted in a little clear plastic box on top of your bike helmet. The 'bullet' form factor is shirley the way to go, unless anyone else knows otherwise?

Researcher sets up illegal 420,000 node botnet for IPv4 internet map

"Goddess of Door Hinges"

I wonder who the goddess of blu tac is?

Holly(oaks) talking head is FUTURE of face messaging, claims prof

Reminds me a bit of this:

But sort of the other way around, mapping other faces onto your face in real time.

http://vimeo.com/29279198

Microsoft issues manual on Brits to Cambridge exports

Re: Classic Yanklish

I have a friend who worked in New York a while ago, on being issued with her work Blackberry she was advised chirpily "If you don't have any pockets, just clip it to our fanny - thats what I do" by the person showing her around.

Penguins, only YOU can turn desktop disk IO into legacy tech

QuarkXPress?

You poor poppet.

Ubuntu 13.04 beta touts search privacy - before it hooks in eBay, IMDb etc

Re: Of the things I'd like to see in the next...

Shirley you could just run Taskmanager.exe under WINE?

Apple files 'iWatch' patent application

Their diagram reminded me of this:

http://horsewithhandsridingabike.blogspot.co.uk/

MIT boffin teases space-station probe's DARK MATTER DISCOVERY

Its the new black

etc

iPad? Pah. Behold the EYEPAD, patented by Sony for the 'PS4'

This is just Sonys initial spec to get the headlines

By the time it comes out it will have been reduced to the back of an envelope that a bank statement came in, half a crayon and a sachet of mayonaise cadged from Weatherspoons.

Curiosity raises mighty robotic fist, punches hole in Mars

Re: "the unpredictable rocks on Mars"

I thought it meant that Barry Unpredictable was holding a reunion gig there....

Don't Menshn the snore: Chick-lit queen's jabber site killed in its sleep

Re: Oh noes!

FLICKR?

Schoolgirl's Hello Kitty catonaut soars to 93,000ft

Re: Hydrogen FTW

FTW INAW Shirley?

Tell Facebook who's the greatest: YOU are!

Oh Hai!

Is this teh ironies?

VIA bakes a fruitier Rock cake to rival the Brit Raspberry Pi

But what of the

Lizard and Spock versions?

Latest Java patch is not enough, warns US gov: Axe plugins NOW

"If you can't avoid...

...using a handful of websites that demand your browser supports Java", why not apply a small piece of selotape to a corn cob.

Lenovo, EA, Intel unite to DESTROY our childhood memories

Re: i think the latency is better on the real game as well

Isn't it obvious?

WAKE UP SHEEPLE!

Apple: What do our Maps need? Stalk-yer-buddies Foursquare tech, NATCH!

They could really improve their map app

by making it so that when you hold the screen, and all the icons jiggle around so you can rearrange them, giving it a little 'x' button on it so you can DELETE IT FROM YOUR PHONE

Musos blast US copyright bods: 'ARTISTS MAKE LOUSY SLAVES!'

Knees?

Knees? I would dream of having knees...

UK cops: How we sniffed out convicted AnonOps admin 'Nerdo'

Re: good work

Also, nobody changed any sprockets on a cassette, so no bicycle maintenance either...

Revealed: The Brit-built GRAVITY-powered light that costs $5

I have one of those espress things they invented

they are awesome!

You do tend to drink quite a lot of espresso if you get one though.

Re: Pedantry...

But the weight has some gravity too, so it pulls itself back down to the floor...*

*Might not be actual science.

When GiffGaff falls over, is it even news any more?

The mobile network run by me...

Works about as well as I would expect it to, seeing as I know nothing about running a mobile network. But still, unlimited data + spotify = woo!

Dry martini, shaken not stirred: Cracking the physics of Bond's martini

SICK WIERDOS!

Make martinis etc with GIN. Preferably with Oxley gin, and only vaguely muddled with ice. With a sealed bottle of vermouth in a cupboard nearby. I prefer a cocktail onion in mine.

Incidentally, at the Fountain Bleu in Miami, they have a signature cocktail which is basically a martini (gin) with three olives stuffed with blue cheese. Absolutely fantastic!

Can we have a martini glass icon please?

Light ties itself in knots - spontaneously

LASER SHOELACES!

thats what the article says to me

Bond's Walther PPK goes digital: A civilized gun updated

"No Country for Old Men"

Now that is one seriously shat film.

Apple CEO: Microsoft Surface 'compromised, confusing'

Re: I knew Steve Jobs...

I'm Steve Jobs

And so's my wife

13-inch 'Retina Display' MacBook Pro to uncloak next Tuesday?

Updated Mac Pros?

please?