* Posts by David 18

174 publicly visible posts • joined 27 Jul 2010


How to get banned from social media without posting a thing

David 18

Possibly the name itself

Maybe the two 8s next to each other triggered an overzealous algorithm?...

What's inside a tech freelancer's backpack? That's right, EVERYTHING

David 18

Re: Power Blocks

Warm and Fuzzy I would expect?

This AI is full of holes: Brit council fixes thousands of road cracks spotted by algorithm using sat snaps

David 18

Nonsense Management Speak overload

"“We hope that Project Amber will act as a showcase of what can be achieved by local authorities working in partnership with the supply chain to achieve lower whole life costs in highway maintenance through the use of surface treatments,”

WTF is wrong with "We hope Project Amber will demonstrate how repairs can be carried out more cheaply"? Anything has to be better than that rambling orgasm of manglement speak.

Even "Tech's cheaper, innit" leaves a less putrid taste in the mouth than that pretentious bollox.

Will Asimov fix my doorbell? There should be a law about this

David 18

Demonic apple cores

Is it just me who find the apple core particularly disturbing? Those demonic eyes staring balefully out of the picture, daring you throw it in the bin.

I'm guessing they are a French representation of Cox's Orange Pippins, Golden Delicious are presumably happy and smiling .

Capita Education Services accidentally spaffs email addresses in Helpdesk snafu

David 18

Reply all

I wonder how many hit Reply All saying "was this meant for me?"..... and how many new tickets were created from that....

Apple calls BS on FBI, AG: We're totally not dragging our feet in murder probe iPhone decryption. PS: No backdoors

David 18
Black Helicopters

Double Bluff?

Whilst the mucky-mucks at the FBI etc might tech illiterate and maybe only risen to the top by virtue of the Peter Principle, I am certain there is a huge army of some of the best tech minds in their employ.

Is it beyond imagination that they have actually cracked the security? What better way to slurp data from important suspects than by ensuring they use something widely known to be impenetrable?

To ensure the high profile crims use that "impenetrable" device just kick off a high profile case every now and then, which they hope to lose because it so obviously flies in the face of what the "Land of the Free" (wish we had a sarcostrophe ) stands for.

Wasn't there a tinfoil hat icon at one point?

Windows 10 Insiders: Begone, foul Store version of Notepad!

David 18

""Notepad++ is seriously showing its age"

For example ?"

Perhaps because it has a usable, intuitive menu (a throwback to the era of usable UIs, when they reached their peak of perfection, before Ribbons messed it all up).

Perhaps because it is fast, extensible, lightweight and useful?

Or maybe just because it's not in the Cloud with built in AI and a mobile app?

Can't you hear me knocking? But I installed a smart knocker

David 18

Re: Then there's compatability..

I do hope you are not looking for sympathy on these pages after admitting to owning a hive and worse, wanting to buy more IoTat! :D

Judge shoots down Trump admin's efforts to allow folks to post shoddy 3D printer gun blueprints online

David 18

Re: More guns = safer for everyone

"Conversely, the least safe states and cities - such as Chicago - have extremely strict gun laws."

You very much can argue with cherry picked statistics. Correlation <> Causation

I would imagine that in genteel old New Hampshire, there was little gun crime anyway, compared to the mean streets of Chicago. I suspect they have tried to tighten gun control to cut the pre-existing problem.

Disclaimer: I am not a USAian, so not personally familiar with either place. Maybe outside popular TV and movies New Hampshire is really a hot bed of gang activity and Chicago is really a peaceful garden city populated entirely by retired lawyers tending their rose gardens.

David 18

Re: Judge Canut was it?

"Cnut forbade the tide from coming in to demonstrate that his power to decree was clearly limited."

Glad there are still a few of us left who know the real story, have a beer and an upvote.

Remember the Uber self-driving car that killed a woman crossing the street? The AI had no clue about jaywalkers

David 18

Re: tl;dr

Looks like I have almost perfectly, and inadvertently, duplicated your post :D

David 18



AI still a myth and a marketeer's wet dream. It's not ready for prime-time and certainly nowhere near ready for anything involving safety in the real world

Heads up from Internet of S*!# land: Best Buy's Insignia 'smart' home gear will become very dumb this Wednesday

David 18

Re: Somewhat curious...

"A subscription model would do it, but how many eejits - even the sort that seem to fall for these things all the time - would fall for "pay us £5 per year per light switch"?"

A similar number to the number of eejits with more money than sense who bought the shite in the first place probably.

US Air Force inks deal with Raytheon on Windows 10 (and other) support for ARSE

David 18

Re: Windows 10 in the Military near the frontline?

"Does it also disable all the call-home functionality under the hood?"

I guess we'll find out when Redmond is a smoking crater.

It's back: The mercifully normal-looking Moto 360 smartwatch

David 18

Re: Don't want a watch

Those are actually some pretty smart ideas! So much "smart" shit about now, which isn't, those are damned good ideas and all eminently do-able with current tech I should imagine. Quick! Get a US patent.

Oh good. They're looking for an NHSX CTO. Hopefully they'll see off 'snake oil' pushers, says GP

David 18

Re: "it still takes me 17 minutes to log on"

"Um, sorry but that's not a Windows problem, it's a hardware problem...."

Which all sounds like an ill-informed enthusiast with apparently little knowledge of all the additional processes, policies, configuration etc required in a large business.

Certainly a bog standard PC World PC will boot fast. It doesn't have to connect and authenticate potentially many disparate systems, that's what takes the time.

Reaction Engines' precooler tech demo chills 1,000°C air in less than 1/20th of a second

David 18

Re: That's quite hot

"Very rightly said, as you watch a CNC machine with a gnarly carbide tool simply buff the surface."

Carbide, you jest, CBN at least. IIRC you can't use diamond because of the Iron content.

David 18

Re: That's quite hot

"And after some experience with such materials, all I can say is "They're right bastards to machine"

Amen to that, not sure what would be worse, big old turbine blades or the 3mm diameter, hollow, tapered to a razor edge metal to glass seals I used to have to machine to 5 micron tolerances in a former life.

The sound of silence is actually the sound of a malicious smart speaker app listening in on you

David 18

Not so awful if it worked

All this "smart" shit wouldn't be quite so bad if it actually fucking worked!

I use Amazon music on my phone after being mugged into getting Prime, and it's hooked up to one of those el-cheapo bluetooth to FM transmitters in the fag lighter. So far so good.

Amazon app, "Alexa play such and such" - works ok(ish) unless it's feeling un-cooperative (try getting it to play Count Basie without it saying "can't find count bessie").

Bluetooth FM jobby mic works exceptionally well, crystal clear on a phone call, so why the hell can't I say "Alexa, play such and such" when the app is merrily playing music on my locked phone in the car. That voice control would actually be useful. WTF is the point if I have to have phone unlocked and in my hand!

Similarly, Android itself won't do anything useful by voice control when locked in the car, but mention google in conversation to a colleague when it's locked on your desk and up it chimes with "No search results" or similar.

Ill conceived, useless shiny bullshit.

How do we stop filling the oceans with Lego? By being a BaaS-tard, toy maker suggests

David 18

Baby and bathwater

It's all gone bloody mad. As someone concerned about plastic waste, decades before it was fashionable I do wish people would realise plastic is not the problem, it's a wonder material. Single use plastic, poorly disposed of is the problem.

We're going deeper Underground: Vulture clicks claws over London's hidden tracks

David 18

Why obsolete?

Why obsolete?

Electric - Tick

Rail - Tick

Eases congestion - Tick

Efficient and fast - Tick

Environmentally friendly - Tick

Presumably replaced with diesel fume belching or "green" electric trucks adding to congestion.


Imagine if Facebook could read your mind: Er, I have some bad news for you...

David 18


And there was me thinking early on reading the article that I could post the first comment recommending people get Charles McGill to represent them!

Thumbs up Dabbsy for referencing the excellent Better Call Saul.

Cloud, internet biz will take a Yellowhammer to the head in 'worst case' no-deal Brexit

David 18

Re: Yellowhammer's were nice yellow birds

@Roj Blake - funniest comment I've seen in a long time here, have a beer. It will have to be a home-grown, warm craft ale, none of that fancy, cold European lager available soon.

GIMP open source image editor forked to fix 'problematic' name

David 18


I'll never forget the time, at work, that without thinking I googled how to use the masking technique in GIMP. With the benefit of hindsight the outcome was expected...

Wait a minute, we're supposed to haggle! ISPs want folk to bargain over broadband

David 18

And this is news?

I've maintained for the last 15+ years during my time with Telewest, then VirginMedia that they are more like a Turkish bazaar than a large comms company.

Fed-up graphic design outfit dangles cash to anyone who can free infosec of hoodie pics

David 18

Re: More importantly....

Here, have one of mine. Dammit, I've run out....

David 18

More importantly....

I'd rather see replacements for the stock marketing images of be-suited, diverse, tie-less "professionals" smiling and pointing at a laptop in a glass-encased conference room.

These seem to appear everywhere, in every context imaginable. I want to poke the eyes out of the phony, smug, gurning imbeciles. Has anyone ever attended an IT-type meeting like that?

Brit infosec firms urge PM Boris to reform the Computer Misuse Act

David 18

Re: “accredited professionals who act ethically ... to detect and prevent criminal activity."

Ah, but with a well worded Act, the burden of proof would be on the authorities to prove without reasonable doubt you were doing it for bad.

If at first you don't succeed, Fold? Nope. Samsung redesigns bendy screen for fresh launch in September

David 18

Re: Another solution...

Sabroni, you're barking up the wrong tree with me. I have absolutely nothing against invention and progress but I despise marketing.

Foldable/bendable/rollable screen tech is genuinely groundbreaking and I salute them, it's far more advanced than most of the bullshit app, IoT etc development that is heralded as "innovative".

I can see a multitude of genuinely useful applications for the technology and I get that without marketing to drones who lap it up, the money will not be there to actually make it work well enough. So I am torn.

Personally I would not ever need one, I do still miss having a phone with a decent size screen and real qwerty buttons to type quickly, but I know I am unusual there.

David 18

Re: Another solution...

"Another solution...

...in search of a problem.

Does anyone genuinely want a folding phone? "

Totally agree with your sentiment, however I am sure that very few people do actually /need/ a folding phone, but many millions will genuinely /want/ one, because they will have been told they do. That seems the general MO of any marketing these days.

When the marketing is really good, these drones genuinely believe they need it too.

The Empire Strikes Back: Trump discovers $10bn JEDI cloud deal may go to nemesis Jeff Bezos, demands probe

David 18

How it would impact his thinking...

"It is yet to be seen how these vendettas and relationships would impact Trump's thinking on the matter – or if they would even factor in to the President's decision making at all."

As far as the orange fascist is able to think, his gossamer-thin skin generally seems to suggest those are the only factors ever considered when any thought process more complicated than a desire for a Coke is coaxed into life.

Humans may be able to live on Mars within halls of aerogel – a wonder material that can trap heat and block radiation

David 18

Re: Why not test it on earth?

Exactly. Recent technological advances have mainly been "soft" or incremental improvement of much older advances - hanging from the nasal hairs of giants, rather than standing on their shoulders. Especially in computing.

Materials have advanced considerably, but air transport has largely got slower, bigger and more economical, where are the huge strides like Concorde, Blackbird etc.

These days it's ALL about profit. Everything is designed down to a cost by a committee of bean-counters, visionary engineers cannot thrive.

Very occasionally there is a huge breakthrough in something, but most of the breathlessly announced "groundbreaking" tech I've seen lately have been slightly rehashed old ideas, dusted off or rediscovered by a disruptor with a flair for marketing.

If they discover an untapped wealth of useful minerals on Mars then we will see people working there in 10 years. Otherwise it's unlikely anyone will even set foot on it for 50. Unless China, or any other recently wealthy country wants to make a point.

Loose tongues and oily seamen: Lost in machine translation yet again

David 18

"my mother regularly used to add a small fabric covered blue coloured "pill" "

I thought this was going to something about going to the disco with your sister at first!

Metropolitan Police's facial recognition tech not only crap, but also of dubious legality – report

David 18

Exactly, with the sort of accuracy it seems to have, they would probably get a higher percentage of wanted offenders v false positives if they just had a simple randomising program telling them when to stop a passer-by.

David 18

Re: It's in its infancy, but it will improve

Ignore it, it's obviously a poorly programmed Russian or Chinese Troll-Bot.

There's that phrase again: JP Morgan CIO told Autonomy's first HP boss it was 'a shit show'

David 18

Re: The Photo

"with knees ajar as if sitting on a toadstool ?"

They need to be careful doing that, that's how fairies get pregnant.

Queue baa, Libra: People will buy what Facebook's selling. They shouldn't, but they will

David 18

The new(ish) Mercedes ranges, which look like they were accidentally left on top of a hot stove and have started to melt and droop at each end?

Please be aliens, please be aliens, please be aliens... Boffins discover mystery mass beneath Moon's biggest crater

David 18

Re: It's the core - hand-waving maths for fun

Are you sure the Hawaii isn't a little publicised RI unit of volume? I thought the Wales was area only.

Judge slaps down Meg Whitman for accusing Autonomy boss of being a 'fraudster who committed fraud'

David 18

"...better judicial system. Just saying."

...Real judicial system... even

IEEE tells contributors with links to Chinese corp: Don't let the door hit you on Huawei out

David 18

Re: Presitator for life

"If he were to attempt to stay, that freedom to bear arms suddenly makes sense (although I really doubt even Trump would be stupid enough to try and stay in power)."

I was sort of thinking the same thing, that is (sort of) one of the reasons for that being in the constitution, as I understand it from here in the UK anyway.

The problem is, most of the gun-totin' fraternity, the ones with the biggest firepower anyway, are likely to be firmly entrenched in Camp Trump.

Anyway, we are likely going to have our own civil war to worry about instead soon, if the Brexit nonsense keeps up any longer.

Jeff Bezos finally gets .Amazon after DNS overlord ICANN runs out of excuses to delay decision any further

David 18

Re: Once upon a time ...

"All this in aid of what? All intelligent polite answers gratefully received."

Money for old rope.

Polygraph knows all: You've been using our user feedback form

David 18

Re: Hot desking

Glad to be of assistance. It's about the only radio station I listen to now.

Always an Eclectic mix and usually interesting. I would happily pay my TV licence solely to keep Radio 4 going unchanged.

Seems to be last place where complex and emotive issues can be truly discussed without generating a Twitter storm that anyone should dare think outside or question Groupthink. The Moral Maze frequently has "did they really just say that?" moments.

David 18

Re: Hot desking

Couldn't agree more. Maybe the tide will turn back soon, I would hope that the decision makers might like programmes like Radio 4's "In Business".

The episode last night mentioned research into why even open plan is a totally shit idea (they were more polite of course)

Link in case anyone wants an interesting listen.


Dedicated techie risks life and limb to locate office conference phone hiding under newspaper

David 18

Passive Aggressive closure

I hope an incident ticket was raised and closed with a suitable "User error", "Training Issue", "No Fault" type code and a good summary of the steps taken and resolution.

Banhammer Republic: Trump declares national emergency, starts ball rolling to boot Huawei out of ALL US networks

David 18

Re: Huawei + China Vs Cisco Systems + United States of America

They could try improving their education (and healthcare) systems.....

AI has automated everything including this headline curly bracket semicolon

David 18

Re: It's already upon us, and it wants to sell ads.

Well, I had a play on that site and I rather hope the "AI" in self driving cars is a little better.

What a load of utter tosh!

David 18

Unfortunately the smell from Lush in my local shopping centre does nothing to blot out the revolting stench from Yo Sushi which permeates the whole centre.

David 18

Completing the circle

I like that concept, AI bollox disappearing infinitely up it's own virtual arsehole in perpetuity.

Dante's virtual 10th circle, reserved for purveyors of snake oil.

A day in the life of London seen through spam and weak Wi-Fi

David 18

"Don't get me wrong, I love you guys to bits. But the British food..? Spleen? Really? Never got used to that affection for disembodied organs. But then again, if we're talking nourishment anyway..."

Is it world Miss The Point of the Joke Day today or something?

David 18

Re: Tsk, tsk, Dabsy

WHOOOOSH, watch out for that low flying humour there Pascal. First time on SFtW?