Posts by Lester Haines

Heathrow Airbus collision 'not a drone incident'

Er, let me just check my records... <straps on jetpack and flies to North Korea>

Perfectly reasonable to assume there may have been someone testing a jetpack from Richmond Park.

NASA eyes stadium-sized orb launch: Part 3

Re: For those not yet converted.

Get to it: http://www.theregister.co.uk/Design/page/reg-standards-converter.html

Redback sinks fangs into Oz builder's todger

What?

What? What?

Europe's Earth-watching sat rides Soyuz to orbit

Re: The Worlds première space port.

From good old Wikipedia: "Kourou is located approximately 500 kilometres (310 mi) north of the equator, at a latitude of 5°10'. The near-equatorial launch location provides an advantage for launches to low-inclination (or geostationary) Earth orbits compared to launches from spaceports at higher latitude. For example, the eastward boost provided by the Earth's rotation is about 463 m/s (1,035 miles per hour) at the Guiana Space Centre vis-à-vis about 406 m/s (908 miles per hour) at the United States east coast Cape Canaveral and Kennedy Space Center spaceports which are at 28°27′N latitude in Florida.[6][7] The proximity to the equator also makes maneuvering satellites for geosynchronous orbits simpler and less costly."

Re: союз v. Ariane

Soyuz has a lifting capability between the Vega and Ariane, so it fills the payload gap.

Stroke of luck, wasn't it?

Tokyo rebrands 2020 Olympics

Re: Re: Lisa Simpson

Merely making an observation. The designer really should have spotted the outrage before unleashing his filth on an unsuspecting world.

Lisa Simpson

Yeah, it really sucked.

Re: The whalesong is deafening where I work...

Superb. Care to email that to me?

El Reg Quid-A-Day Nosh Posse spared chickpea ordeal

Re: Sorry to hear the project is on hold

Live Below the Line decided to take a break and regroup for 2017. So, the decision was made for us.

Google Loon balloon crash lands in Chile

Not even a millicat, I reckon.

Soyuz to loft Sentinel-1B Earth-watching sat

Re: Re: Horizontal integration

This is true. Carry on.

Horizontal integration

I believe we've already exhausted this particular innuendo vein on previous stories.

Are bearded blokes more sexist?

Re: MISOGNY!

Fair enough. I think we should survey 500 bearded ladies and ask them: "Is patriarchal conservatism behind the exclusion of bearded ladies from beard surveys?"

Chilling evidence emerges of Kilocat weapon

Re: Have a beer...

Thank you sir, I will indeed take a couple of ales later.

Mighty big sandwich

It'd be a couple of these, for sure...

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2014/12/06/post_pub_nosh_francesinha/

ISS to host space truck rally

Re: Re: fingers crossed

This article was published before the Falcon 9 launch. That'd explain it.

Dropping 1,000 cats from 32km: How practical is that?

Yeah, nice one.

Bavarian town rescinds Hitler's honorary citizenship

Re: Lester, your Prime Minister

Poor old Rajoy. He's done nothing worse than turn a blind eye while his corrupt mates have pocketed as much wonga as possible. Bless.

Re: Oh, Adolf...

Could have been Dave Hitler, the "lesser known brother of evil". Had no problem with Jews, enjoyed the occasional drink with Slavs and held down a respectable day job as a human right lawyer.

Re: Re: only 71? bah!

Thanks for the Chancellor appointment date correction - updated.

Paul von Hindenburg was the man responsible, no matter what the extenuating circumstances. Whether history has been unkind to him will doubtless be a matter of eternal debate.

Inflatable space podule set for orbital trial

Re: LOHAN

Just as likely as getting FAA approval ;-)

Brits rattle tin for 'revolutionary' hydrogen-powered car

Re: Re: 8.5kW and 0-60 in 10 seconds?

Indeed - the capacitors are vital in providing the acceleration va-va-voom.

Re: ero emissions?

In the car, in a fuel cell. As for the rest of it, that's not so clear.

April Fool decries Blighty's dodecaquid

Fair enough. Have a big hug and welcome to El Reg.

Re: Re: " fair game for a ribbing."

Precisely.

Re: Re: " fair game for a ribbing."

Bless. Imagine if we had to invite everyone who wasn't a 12-sided muppet for a beer. The bar bill would be well over 50 quid, maybe even as high as £100.

Re: " fair game for a ribbing."

The welcome awaiting a newbie depends on the manner of his or her entrance. What do you expect here - a big hug and an invitation for a pint?

Flying Finns arm octocopter with chainsaw

Re: I wonder...

Programme in a giant todger shape and set it loose on the neighbour's privet hedge? Hmmmm...

Blighty starts pumping out 12-sided quids

Re: Huh?

Oh dear, oh dear.

Ah, but wait...

"The shiny new pound has been well received, apart from predictable grumblings from vending machine manufacturers about the cost of converting their kit to accept the dodecaquid."

Sick to death of mighty rocket launches? Avoid these dates

Re: 3 Soyuz launches

They do get around a bit.

Spanish launch heroic bid to seize Brit polar vessel

Re: Re: Regardless of what NERC decide

Cammell Laird in Merseyside. Get to it.

Too Naked for the Nazis streaks to literary glory

That's me trying to establish my intellectual credentials when running for Russian president. Should have been on horseback, really.

Mighty Soyuz stands proud at Baikonur

Thank the NASA snapper - a fine job

Flying Scotsman attacked by drone

Re: Lester

Correct ;-)

Iron pigeon

It is pretty good.

'Naut triumvirate set for ISS launch

Re: .:.

It'd be good, wouldn't it?

Hi-def ExoMars launch vid lacks volcanic lair vibe

Hypergolic

All three stages, plus the Briz-M upper stage burn N2O4/UDMH. Old school stuff.

Want to kick butts? Go cold turkey

Long odds

That's correct. The odds are clearly against quitting.

NASA's mighty SLS to burn 1.215 Olympic-sized pools

Re: Needless confusion!?!!?!

And that's exactly why we have the Olympic-sized pool as the standard.

Airbags

By covering it with an insulating layer of aerogel-filled Bulgarian airbags, apparently

Monster motor breathes fire in Mississippi

Re: Re: That's enough to drain an average family-sized swimming pool

I don't know, but here's our readership in Olympic-sized swimming pools: http://www.theregister.co.uk/2013/01/22/readership_stats/

ExoMars ready to roll atop bloody big rocket

Re: Re: bloody big rocket

It's certainly a matter for future consideration, vis-a-vis brontosauruses.

German lodges todger in 13 steel rings

Re: Mr. Haines + comments

You're too kind, even if my grammar is fewer than satisfactory for some of our beloved commentards.

US chap sharpens paradigm-busting scissors

Re: Invented by the Romans?

In a moment of inspiration celebrated by the poet Cutullus.

Re: Re: Simpler solution - angle grinder

Agreed.

Re: Wear gloves.

Right-handed or left-handed?

Austrian mayor spunks €40k on virgin-eating dragon

Re: Hang on.....

Well yeah, but it'd be a bit off to chain a virgin to a tower as bait, unless it's Ann Widdicombe.