* Posts by Neil

113 publicly visible posts • joined 30 May 2007


Who will win the epic battle for the kitchen OS?

Paris Hilton

You're fired

This won't knock the Amstrad Em@iler of the phone throne, it doesn't even run Spectrum games.

Paris, because I'd be her apprentice.

Ingram sore over Belgian warehouse burglary


Not surprised

I deal with Ingram at a push, but I tend to favour C2000 and other distrubutors for this exact reason. Trying to deal with Ingram when you have anything more than a purchase to make is right up there with British Telecom, only more less indian and more mockney.

Cobol hits fifty


@ Richard

Nor did I lol, but the natural progression would have been C or some OoP based language, not Cobol!



I remember in 1999 we were set to start our second year of computer science at college. The C programming tutor had some kind of breakdown leaving us with a void in the curriculum. The solution? We all had to learn Cobol for a year instead. It really wasn't the progression from Pascal we were hoping for, and I'm glad to say I have never had to deal with it ever since then!

Happy birthday Cobol.

Tory who claimed brother's tech gear on expenses quits


phone the police?

What she has done is nothing short of defrauding each and every one of us, it sickens me.

Gov spunks hundreds of thousands on mobe condom clip


Wasted money

Would have been cheaper to send them all chastity belts and bonjella.

Intel hit with largest ever EU fine

Thumb Down


Perhaps if Intel didn't take these anti-competetive measures AMD would have more money to develop faster chips.

Microsoft teams up with US gov on double 'ard XP


Double team

I teamed up with myself to make my XP installation more secure. I run as a user and downloaded windows updates. I also installed a firewall. Would you like to interview me now or tomorrow?

Renault intros e-MPV



how about.....reverse?

Microsoft's new search - Built on open-source


Like a red rag to a bull

Will there ever be an informed, nuetral article on The Reg which includes the word Microsoft? I've read more informative articles in The Sun.

Windows 7’s XP Mode — Virtually worth the effort



I think people are missing the point on this. For a start how many of your applications aren't compatible with Windows 7 in native mode? Not that many at all.

XP Mode is really there to draw a line under 32bit Windows and legacy code. It gives Windows 8 the ability to jettison all the old code and cater for backwards compatability through virtualisation and move on to a leaner code base.

I can't see why you would bitch about this, it's the best new feature to appear in Windows for years.

Satellite to offer 10Mbit broadband to entire UK



Any competition is good competition. Maybe it will prompt BT to climb out of the dark ages without spitting their dummies out.

Microsoft releases Vista SP2 to manufacturing



Flog that dead horse, flog it good.

Windows 7 gets built in XP mode


In response

@Eddie....Active Directory? Come on seriously? you think NT4 is worth sticking with?

@Stuart I think you'll be surprised if you actually use it. I'm running Windows 7 on a 2ghz Pentium-M and it's just as quick and responsive as XP. Vista didn't last 2 days on it.

I think MS are referring to virtualisation in the style of Xen or Hypervisor. It's not a large additional overhead, it's only virtualising the application, not a copy of XP for each and every old app you run.

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Copied from OSX

OSX included the virtualised environment for legacy compatability, and it did the trick for the transition period until everything went Intel native.

This atually really great news for Windows. By virtualising everything made for XP and before, when Windows 8 arrives MS can strip out all 16/32bit legacy code and have a really quick and lean OS.

The Registers articles are getting less and less credible lately.

Microsoft names Windows 7 RC1 dates


I'm looking forward to it

Credit where credit is due. Windows 7 is a great OS and I'm looking forward to trying out the RC. The beta works well on everything I have tried from my old laptop to my multi-core desktop.

'Miracle' bra saves Detroit woman from robber's bullet

Paris Hilton


Paris.....because she has deflected many shots at her breast without the aid of a bra.

Researchers dissect world's first Mac botnet



"Just because it uses over 100% CPU, that does not make kernel_task a virus!"

Macs can run tasks at over 100% of the available CPU power?

How much can they go up to? 110%? 1000%? 100000%?

Peugeot's on-road, off-road ‘leccy ATV



If only someone could take out my engine and drop in an electric one, even if it means losing the boot to batterys.

We need normal cars with electric motors, not wacky 1 seaters. If the technology can't produce this yet then it's not ready for mass use.

Wanna upgrade from Windows 7 beta? Go back to Vista first



It's nothing to cry about. Why bother spending all that time building and testing an upgrade path from a Beta product.

Lets not lose sight of what Beta is. The only reason this is a problem is because 7 has proven to be a great product and the uptake of the Beta is so high.

Conficker zombie botnet drops to 3.5 million



I'll eat when I get hungry

I'll drink when I get dry

If the life I live don't kill me

Then I guess I'll never die

I'll tune up my fiddle

I'll rosin up my bow

And find a girl to hold me tight

Anywhere I go

Corn liquor corn liquor's what I cry

If you don't give me corn liquor boy

Somebody's gonna die

Somebody's gonna die oh lord

Somebody's gonna die

MS punts stripped down Windows Server 2008 at tiny SMBs



SBS 2003 is a great product.

SBS2008 offers the same.....but it's about 150% more expensive.

Ahhh say Microsoft, it's cheaper though if you look at the CAL costs. Yes...if you buy more than 25 CALS that is.

MS have priced their SMB product out of the SMB market.

Sun packs 150 billion web pages into meat locker


Nice box

any illegal immegrants hiding in there?

Cold-water treatment for Ballmer on Windows Mobile


Mobile bashing

I use windows mobile 6 with the company exchange server. Push mail works a treat, google maps plays nicely with the gps. Granted it's not the prettiest OS but it works for me, I think people are being a bit over the top when it comes to bashing it.

Yes it's starting to look aged and needs some new features, but it works.

Apple overhauls MobileMe


all is forgiven....

....because it has an apple sticker on it.

Woolies Pic'n'Mix bows out with eBay auction


The penultimate bag of pic and mix...

....because I've still got a bag here with sweeties in it from Woolies!

Off to ebay

Vista SP2 release candidate imminent?


RE: Can you small it?

"You can dress a pig in silk slippers, but its still a pig and smells just as bad!"

But this isn't about Mac's

Microsoft plans to issue non-update update for Win 7


@ Andrew

"And why does the get-me-coat icon look like a pick-pocket at work?"

I always thought it looked like the invisible man receiving hand relief.

Apple iPhone police censor South Park


4 words

donkey r*ping sh** eaters

Copyright cops launch MS-happy software compliance tool


Pulling a fast one

Are fast still offering up to £1000 if you dob someone in for copying software?

Can't believe they are still in operation

Cocaine now cheaper than lager


coke is the real thing

I bet this really gets up Gordons nose

Mortal Kombat maker Midway goes titsup


Insert Coin to Continue


Microsoft SKUs Windows 7 clarity


Digging a hole

I just got an email from MS...a technet update about Windows 7, and in the first paragraph it says:

"So what are my first impressions? Well, for me it's those small changes which make it an exciting new OS. When I first tried to access my wireless at home it asked for the network key. But now the default is to display the characters, and the option is to hide them. Hurrah"

How is that secure? come on MS, get the basics right!




Why not just kick out one version, with all the features, priced in the middle.

Mac flirts with 10 per cent web share

Jobs Horns

Drill it down mofo

Safari on a PC doesn't = a Mac user :p

Windows 7 UAC shutoff 'bug' leaves Microsoft unmoved



@Anonymous Coward

It's not a bug, but a risk. If malware can turn off UAC it current;y doesnt pop up and prompt the user. Therefore the malware can silently disable it.

It's Beta. It's hardly earth shattering news. Beta has flaw. shock horror.

We can moan if it's in the final. UAC is as someone else put it, a bandaid.

Stop putting "everyone" or "domain users" in the local admin groups. Stop running as admin.

Google mistakes entire web for malware


ho ho ho

I bet Yahoo and AltaVista thought they had all their christmas presents early......and then had them snatched away again an hour later.

Memo to Microsoft: Enough with the SKUed Windows


Windows 7

I'm impressed with the Windows 7 Beta so far.

If they release 1 sku it will be the icing on the cake.

I have lost count of the number of times I have been asked to install a server for a small business, and found they are all running XP home (no domain option).

Make it small, fast, secure and affordable....and MS will be on to a winner

Linux to spend eternity in shadow of 'little blue E'


The real problem is....

....that unless Linux takes a giant leap into precompiled, click and go usefulness the masses will never "get it", and Windows will continue to eveolve.

Linux was handed its chance with Vista. After testing Windows 7 Beta I think that door is about to be closed for another 3 years.

Govt uses Obscenity Law to stuff up cartoon sex loophole


Shut your ******* face uncle ******

Does this spell the end of...south park?

EU says Microsoft violated law with IE on Windows

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I'm for it

The sooner companies are forced to strip the crap out of their OS's the better.

I want my OS to be small, functional and fast. I don't want it to include applications, only system tools. I'll choose the applications thank you.

But is a browser now an essential system tool, or an application?

First Windows 7 beta puts fresh face on Vista

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Just an exuse to stop downgrades....

This biggest benefit of making version 7 instead of Vista SP2 for MS is that it will include downgrade rights to....vista....not xp. Our hand will be forced.

The Apple Armada - Still worthy of the Jolly Roger?


Mac Vs PC

come on guys....let's clear up Amiga Vs Atari first :p

Vista scrabbles for X Factor


Fill in the blank

Was it just me or did the advert not mention the word "Vista" once, only "Windows". Even MS won't utter the dreaded V word.

Linux at 17 - What Windows promised to be


Computer says no

reasons Linux isn't suitable for *me* yet:



Active Directory

It's not windows itself that stops me from switching full time, it's the functionality that's available to me in an understandable and accessible way. God knows Windows is flawed, and Linux has the potential to destroy it, but these 3 things are what keep me with Windows.

Developers to get Windows 7 pre beta next month


Misty Eyes

Lets not get all sentimentale about XP, Vista is aweful, but XP isn't perfect, I still see spyware infections daily on XP machines (not in my office mind) :) it's far from perfect.

Tesco reveals unannounced Dell 12in netbook



yes lets buy our laptops from Tesco so that local businesses will not be able to compete and our town centres will fill with charity shops.

Bugger, too late.

Orange can't find BlackBerry maps


Typical Orange

I had 3 Tyttn2 phones in my office last month, one on orange, one of vodafone and one on O2. All the same handset.

I wanted to use push email with a self signed certificate, 2 of the phones installed the cert no problem, the Orange refused.

Despite numerous HTC the handset makers revealved all. They told us that Orange use their own firmware and that we should email a special orange address to have the certificate made in to a signed cab file that will work on the phone. It worked. Just a shame Orange themselves were completely clueless about it.

I for one will not be going near orange any time soon. They are up there with BT for poor customer service.

Customs raids tech trade show


@ El'Reg

"Darkies" and "Duskies"

Does anyone moderate this? I'm all for a giggle on the comments boards but not racist remarks, even if they are a poor attempt at humour.

Anatomy of a malware scam



I have been cleaning at least 2 PC's a day of this from various home and business customers. It's getting through Symantec, Trend, Norton and AVG. I fix it using SDFix, Spybot and an AVG scan in safe mode.

Another reason why Windows 7 should not be a rehash of Vista!